© This work is the property of the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill. It may be used freely by individuals for research, teaching and personal use as long as this statement of availability is included in the text.
The electronic edition is a part of the UNC-CH
digitization project, Documenting the American South.
Transcript of the manuscript. The original is in the Southern Historical Collection, University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill.
This electronic edition has been created by Optical Character Recognition (OCR). OCR-ed text has been compared against the original document and corrected. The text has been encoded using the recommendations for Level 4 of the TEI in Libraries Guidelines.
Original grammar, punctuation, and spelling have been preserved. Encountered typographical errors have been preserved, and appear in red type.
In Volume One of the Manuscript, page number 135 is skipped. No text is missing.
In Volume Four of the Manuscript, page numbers 286 and 319 are skipped. No text is missing.
Any hyphens occurring in line breaks have been removed, and the trailing part of a word has been joined to the preceding line.
All quotation marks, em dashes and ampersand have been transcribed as entity references.
All double right and left quotation marks are encoded as ” and “ respectively.
All single right and left quotation marks are encoded as ’ and ‘ respectively.
All em dashes are encoded as —
Indentation in lines has not been preserved.
Spell-check and verification made against printed text using Author/Editor (SoftQuad) and Microsoft Word spell check programs.
A month since, we had the pleasure of receiving a visit from Uncles Moses and Dole; while here they invited me to go north with them this Summer; I declined, thinking that I could not leave school so long, but as Uncle Dole wrote from Georgia and again invited me, and as I wished very much to go, Father and Mother gave me permission.
We expect Uncle Dole about the seventeenth of the month. I anticipate with great pleasure the trip up the Mississippi and the meeting with my relatives; it is now three years since I have seen any of them except Grandma; and my cousins must have altered very much. Uncle Pike now owns an extensive farm, and lives in the largest house in the village, his son Charley, now in his sixteenth year has grown from childhood into youth since I saw him; cousin Eddie Joselyn when I saw him last, was a handsome intelligent child of eleven years, he has probably by this time grown into a tall mannish youth, little Bertie has grown much; they have no doubt forgotten that cousin Sarah has also grown, and will scarcely recognise in me their favorite playfellow of former days.
I can picture in my mind the grassy hills and the large lilac bushes of my birthplace, but no doubt they are also changed, and new houses will take the place of green lanes, ornamental shrubbery will have grown where the purple lilacs used to bloom. Strangers will say “How much the village has improved since I last saw it”. But to me associations of pleasure cluster around the Snug little house with its painted floors and border of currant bushes and in this as in every thing else I am averse to change.
With me that which I have used for many years becomes sacred; a time
We have at last commenced our journey and are nearly two hundred
miles on the way. Vicksburg
Father, Uncle Dole and myself arrived in Vicksburg at eight o'clock last night, we had a very dusty ride from Amite to Jackson, which place we reached at about six o'clock, the rest of the way was very pleasant; we are staying at the Washington House and do not expect to leave until tomorrow as there will be no boat until then.
I expect to enjoy myself very much, Uncle Dole is very kind indeed,
we are to go up the Mississippi to Rock Island, thence to Chicago by railroad,
and also by railroad to Buffalo and Niagara Falls, thence to Montreal
probably by the St. Lawrence river, thence to Portland, Maine, and then to
South Newmarket. How delightful it will be to visit Montreal, how strange
it will be to me, for I have never yet been out of my native country;
Niagara too, and the Father of Waters, the great western prairies and
the wide expanse of the great lakes all will be new to me and I shall
enjoy it very much. Uncle Dole thinks we shall arrive in New Hampshire
about the fifteenth of September and return to Georgia in October, so
that I shall have a whole month of pleasure, and pleasure too as new,
Since writing the above I have learned that we are to stay here until
Friday, Uncle Dole says that the City of Memphis is an old boat and that
the Morrison, which will be here Friday twelve o'clock is far preferable,
besides he and Father wish to go out to Morton the present terminus of the
Southern road, to look at some lands and do not feel very anxious to get
off; they left for Morton this evening at three o'clock and will be absent
until tomorrow night.
Yesterday I was quite lonely and the time passed heavily but today has been very pleasant. A lady from Mississippi called Mrs. Smyley, her two sons, one grown and the other a little boy, and Miss Crawford a young lady travelling with her, came here last night, I saw them this morning and passed five hours in their company so that the time seemed shorter.
Mrs. Smyley is a very cultivated and pleasant lady; Miss Crawford is young, just two years from school, very well educated but not easy in her manners and conversation, or tasty in her dress this is almost her first journey, she was however quite pleasant and communicative, the young man appeared to be intent upon his own affairs and neglected his Mother and her friend very much leaving them to manage for themselves, his Mother idolizes him and thinks him perfect, although according to Miss Crawford he is both high tempered and dissipated. They went away on the City of Memphis.
Mr. Boulineau, his wife and two children came today, Mr. B. is a gentleman from Savannah whom Father is going to employ on the Southern road.
Yesterday I was prevented from writing by several things, In the morning I went out immediately after breakfast, to Mr. Reading's old house and remained there until after twelve when I dressed for dinner; after dinner, being very much fatigued I went to my room, intending to lie down, but before I had put my clothes away I recollected Mrs. Boulineau and went to her room which I did not leave until time to dress for tea. At eight o'clock or half past Father and Uncle Dole came, I was very glad indeed to see them. Uncle Dole has bought a place near Morton. As the Capitol is a very fine boat we concluded not to wait for the Morrison but to come on the Capitol, it was half past five when we came on board. I have a good stateroom indeed.
I should like to write more but the boat shakes too much.
We have not many passengers and I am glad that we have not, because I should not then have my stateroom to myself. The company is not very pleasant and I have formed no acquaintance with any of them, there are two young ladies on board who are going to school, one of them came and spoke to me yesterday, asking me quite a number of questions all of which I answered but asked none in return.
The scenery upon the river is not very much varied, it consists chiefly
of plantations of cotton wood which are so straight and so near of a size
that seem as if planted by the hand of man, moderately high bluffs, and
sandy stretches of shore covered with an apparently recent growth of bright
We have just left Napoleon, in Arkansas and have Mississippi for our left shore and Arkansas for our right. We passed three steamers yesterday and six today.—
We arrived here at about ten o'clock this morning and should have been here by eight, but for an accident which happened last night and which detained us for some time.
The boat was going very fast indeed, when she struck a very large snag which came through the guards just forward of the wheel-house and through the kitchen of boat, it was some time before it could be cut away, and in its passage broke nearly all the glass and some of the crockery; there was but one person hurt, who was the head cook, and who could not be found; it was thought that when the snag entered, it injured him in some way, and that he being very much frightened at the crash jumped overboard, and being unable to swim he probably drowned. We are stopping at the Cayoso House.
I was obliged to hurry my journal of the 28th very much because I had that evening written to Father and Mother and it was dusk when I commenced my journal, and as we have been travelling upon the railroad for the last few days I have not written again until now.
I shall copy a letter to Mother which I have just finished.
My dear Mother, We are now in St. Louis, and are stopping at the Planter's House, we arrived at three o'clock yesterday evening and will probably remain until tomorrow morning, seven o'clock.
I wrote to you and Father at Memphis, informing you of our safe arrival at that place; we left there at half past five Monday morning, at about half past two we arrived at Columbus, Kentucky.
The road from Memphis to Columbus lay through Tennessee and a little of Kentucky—the country was cool and pleasant, so cool indeed that I was none too warm with my thick dress and heavy gray cape.
A noisy party—Uncle Dole—his notice of ladies—he is taken for my brother We had a very pleasant quiet ride until we come to a place called Trenton, where our quiet was effectually ended by an influx of five boisterous Tennessee females, and more than that number of males, their loud talking, shouts of merriment, and discordant songs drowned the voice of the iron horse, and perfectly astounded Uncle Dole who said several times, that the people could not be sober, indeed, their behavior forcibly reminded me of my imaginations of the feasts of Bacchus in olden times. I learned from their conversation that they were from Jackson Tenn. and had been attending a Baptist convention at Trenton; so much for Tennessee and her children.
But before I go on, I must tell you how observant Uncle Dole is, he notices the ladies so much, and makes so many remarks upon them and their manners, that I told him one day that he most have some reason for such particular observation, “Oh No'' he said “I always liked to look at them”; every one takes him for my brother, a young lady on board the steamer Capitol asked me if “that gentleman” was not my brother, when I told her that he was my Uncle
she was perfectly astonished, “she thought he was too young for my Uncle”; another person asked if he was my brother or my husband; yesterday when we came here, Uncle Dole went to get our rooms and left me in the parlor, presently the proprietor came and asked me if I had not a brother with me? Although laughing to myself at his mistake I did not set him right, and he showed me to my room with great affability. Journey—Centralia—Prairie ride—the “skittish” horse— I have wandered so far from my route that I expect you will have to turn back before you remember that I was at Columbus last, we went on board the steamer W. A. Eaves at this place, and after a ride of nearly three hours we arrived at Cairo; while on this boat I made the acquaintance of a New York lady whom Uncle Dole said was the best looking and the
bestlady we had seen since we left home.At Cairo we took the five o'clock train for Centralia where we stopped that night.
It is a considerable town, and the house where we stayed was a good country tavern. I have never enjoyed a better
nights sleep than I enjoyed there.As the morning train for St. Louis did not start until nine; and Centralia was situated in the midst of a prairie, Uncle Dole thought he would try and get a conveyance, so as to show me the country; accordingly he went out and succeeded in getting a light buggy and a young horse, which— according to the owner's definition “Is rather skittish but there ain't nothin' bad about him”; we drove some ways out of the town and saw very pretty little farms and a team of four oxen breaking up the prairie. We were about half way back, when we heard a whistle and saw the train upon which we wished to take passage coming slowly up to the station.
Uncle Dole now attempted to drive the “skittish” horse a little faster,
for he had been walking since we left the house, whereupon he threw up his head and began to make some demonstration of temper by leaping out of the road, but as he was fortunately very easily controlled he soon ceased these gyrations and consented to come into the road again, but upon the least application of the whip he would renew them, and did not seem at all inclined to put himself in a hurry, how provoking it was! there we were in sight of the train and only a quarter of a mile distant, and if, as Uncle Dole said, we had “had a horse that was a horse” we might easily have reached the train, but we were obliged to endure all the tortures of suspense, while our horse, wholly unconcerned, trotted leisurely along. However, very fortunately for us, the train stopped at Centralia for breakfast and we reached the station in time to get on board the cars a few moments before they started, although we were very glad of this it was almost as bad to have to endure the fear of being left as to be actually left; Uncle Dole said that he had acted against his better judgment in that case, and that he never would do so again. I forgot to tell you about the weather in Illinois, we reached Centralia at ten o'clock at night, and though I was wrapped up in my thickest clothes I trembled all over, and my teeth actually chattered with the cold. I also had some
excellentfruit in Illinois. Uncle Dole gave me one of the largest Indian peaches I have ever seen, while peeling it I had some difficulty to prevent the juice from running through my fingers, it was delicious, and the apples! I wish I could send you some.I was very much pleased with the country from Centralia to St. Louis; the first part of the way the prairies extended as far as the eye could reach, and were dotted here and there by herds of cattle which were grazing quietly upon the rich pasturage, now and then we saw a little farm house, and sometimes
enormous fields of the best kind of corn with Hay fields newly mown and large stacks of hay around. Illinois people. Reasons for travelling by land. Ride to fair ground St. L. As we went farther on, the ground became rolling the houses, fields and cattle very numerous and we saw some fine orchards of peach and apple trees, the peaches looked as if bearing down the limbs with their weight and many red
cheecks gleamed through the dark foliage of the apple trees, the stations along the road were all prosperous little towns, the people looked sober healthful, and industrious, in a word everything denoted the presence of a healthy enterprising spirit throughout the state.—I have not mentioned in my journal the reason why we came to St. Louis by railroad instead of Steamboat, Uncle Dole was told that It was very dangerous to navigate the river above Memphis on account of the low water and the numerous snags, a proof of this danger we had already had, and although I had not written either Father or Mother about our accident, I thought they might see it in the papers, and I knew that they would be alarmed if they knew that we were on the river, therefore, as Uncle Dole left the decision with me, I concluded to come by land.
After dinner Uncle Dole and I went out to ride, and to see what was to be seen in St. Louis, we rode through the city and out to the fair ground, which is the pride of the place, it is indeed a very pretty and pleasant enclosure; St Louis is a large place and has same very fine stores but I do not think that I should like to live here.
I must now put away my writing for it is now pretty late and we leave here at seven tomorrow morning.—
We left St. Louis at seven o'clock yesterday morning on the Steamer Baltimore for Alton. After a ride of two hours we reached that place, a town of about the size of Vicksburg and almost as hilly. We then took the cars upon the St. Louis, Alton and Chicago R. R. for Chicago, the country consisted principally of grassy slopes thinly wooded, and small prairies.
Towards the close of the day we came through very extensive prairies one of them more than twelve miles through, and the boundaries of which could scarcely be discerned on either side.
It was after ten o'clock when I was waked from my comfortable nap by the bustle in the cars, and looking round perceived that everyone was gathering up their wrappers and placing themselves in attitudes of readiness. Uncle Dole informed me that we were entering into Chicago; and at last the train stopped; “Chicago” said a man coming into the car with a lantern.
Then came the hurry to leave the train, the contact with the cold
cutting air, and the tedious ride through the silent, deserted streets,
it was after eleven when we reached the Richmond house, we were shown to
my room, where we waited, cold, tired and sleepy for more than half an hour
for our baggage, at last it came. Uncle Dole went to his room really sick;
and on looking into the glass I saw such a haggard, blue face that I quickly
withdrew my gaze; a good
This afternoon we drove round the city, but before going anywhere else Uncle Dole called on a Doctor Smith a young friend of his from South Newmarket, and obtained him as a chaperone during our ride; we went first to the Court house, and on arriving at the top of the building we had a view of the whole of Chicago. It is a much larger place than I expected to see, a river runs through the town, which divides into two branches, and forms the North, South, and west sides of Chicago; we drove through a great many streets only a few of which I can recollect, upon Michigan and Wabash Avenues we saw very many fine residences, the former street runs along the side of the lake, of which we had a very good view. Upon Lake Street we saw some very fine stores, there are some handsome Churches here, mostly Presbyterian, although Dr Smith informed me that there are some Episcopal ones on the north side which are handsomer than those which we saw, there is one fine Methodist Church, and a very pretty Universalist one, but I was most pleased with the second Presbyterian Church, it is built of a peculiar kind of stone, found as Dr Smith told me, only in this locality, a kind of bitumen oozes out of the stone in warm weather, (although it is solid, and good building material) which gives it a blackened and ancient appearance, the architecture too is rather peculiar, it has one lofty spire and numerous smaller points which rise from all parts of the building, this, together with the gray stone and its painted glass windows, gives it a venerable and antique appearance which is to me very pleasing.
Chicago does not look like a very new place as I expected it would, it is true that nearly all the buildings are put up in modern style, but then they look substantial, and not like mushrooms which spring up and die in a day, I am very much pleased with the place.
We are stopping at a very nice house, it is so quiet and so free from the crowd; we have a table to ourselves at breakfast, dinner and supper, and though the house is full we are not troubled by noisy servants or rude neighbors. We have excellent coffee and milk and good fare, and the servants are very civil and as attentive as can be expected at a public house.
The chambermaid informed me today while she was lacing my dress that this is the only house in the place where negro waiters are employed.
It is two weeks tomorrow since I left home and in seven days we shall be in New Hampshire. We left Chicago yesterday morning at eight o'clock, and arrived here at about half past seven in the evening, tomorrow we shall leave for Niagara Falls, perhaps we shall stop at Buffalo.
This morning Uncle Dole ordered a carriage to take us to the Presbyterian
Church, the carriage did not come and as we were afraid of being
late we thought that we could find it and walked along up the street. We
soon came to a large brick building, which Uncle Dole said was a Methodist
Church. We entered thinking that this would do as well as any, and applied
to the sexton for a seat he conducted us through the door and into the
vestibule which was crowded, when we arrived at the inner door and I looked
into the supposed Methodist Church I was very much surprised to see the
light of candles in midday. On looking further I perceived the figure of
Jesus painted on a cross and the virgin standing at the foot. I immediately
Ten days since I wrote in my journal! A long time it seems to count the days, but a very short one it has been to me, every moment of my time has been so fully occupied that I could scarcely find time to send short and half written despatches to Mother; but at length we have arrived at South Newmarket, and as Uncle Moses and Dole have gone to Boston this morning I find time to write up my journal since leaving Detroit.
We left this place at quarter past eight on Monday morning, in order to reach the railroad upon which we were to travel (the Great Western) we were obliged to go across the river to a place called Windsor, which is situated in Canada.
When we had ferried nearly across, a gentleman came into the saloon whom Uncle Dole recognized as Mr. Congdon, a gentleman from Massachusetts originally, but who resided in Savannah for some time. Father thinks him a fine man, he is one of Miss Clark's particular friends. We had the pleasure of his company as far as Suspension bridge; during the conversation he remarked how very much I looked like my Mother, and said that he should know me from my resemblance to her, he also said that he should have known Miss Clark had taught me because my conversation and manners are so much like hers.
I did not like the looks of Canada nearly so much as I did those of
Illinois. We arrived at Suspension bridge at nearly four o'clock, here we
After a good night's sleep we arose the next morning prepared to visit and admire the falls. The locality of Niagara is so well known that no description need be given either of it, or the country around. Suffice it to say, that we visited the museum, went under the horseshoe fall, visited table rock, Lundy's lane battle ground, the burning spring, the suspension bridge, Coat Island, Terrapin tower and descended Biddle's stairs that morning. We returned home just in time to dress for dinner at three o'clock.
In the afternoon my cold, which had become worse since we left Detroit, gave me much trouble I had to go to bed and suffered all the afternoon with fever and a bad headache. I went down to tea, however, and a cup of hot coffee and a good night's sleep, did me a great deal of good.
After breakfast we walked down to the ferry house, and were rowed across the river in a little skiff. I felt somewhat afraid when we went up so near the fall in order to reach the eddy, but there was no danger and we crossed in safety.
We went immediately on board the “Maid of the Mist” and as there were
several other couples we all put on waterproof cloaks with a hood of the
same, and went up on deck. The view from the maid of the mist was nothing
for when we were not blinded by the mist the sun shining upon the white foam
was so dazzling that no mortal eyes could look upon it, the cool spray bath
was very pleasant, though, and I did not regret going. When the little steamer
might have been safe although it looked very
dangerous. After spending nearly two hours in the delightful grounds at the
top of the inclined plane, we descended and were ferried back to the Canada
side. I went to my room and had just sealed a hurried letter to Mother when
Uncle Dole came for me to go to dinner.
We left Niagara at half past one A.M. Wednesday the 7th of September.
I had been dreading to visit The Falls ever since I left home, because
I feared to be disappointed.
I always enjoy things more when I can step by step unfold and appreciate them.
But I must leave Niagara, although I have but sketched the outlines of our visit there, and describe our journey down the St. Lawrence.
Leaving Niagara at half past one, in the omnibus, we proceeded to
Lewiston is situated near the mouth of the Niagara river. It was at Queenston, opposite Lewiston, that the British general, Isaac Brock fell, in the bloody battle of 1812, his monument stands on Queenston heights a little above the town.
I shall wait until tomorrow to describe the St. Lawrence, for it is now two o'clock and I must go over to Aunt Lydia's and practice.
I have not been able to write in my journal for the last few days and so I have given up ever writing about the St. Lawrence and Montreal; a few words about these must suffice.
We left Lewiston at 2 o'clock, Wednesday the 7th of Sep. on the steamer New York, crossed the lake and touched at Toronto before sunset, remained on the New York until about ten the next morning when we arrived at Ogdensburgh, where we went on board the steamer Welland, which boat conveyed us through the rapids to Montreal.
We arrived at Montreal at seven o'clock Thursday afternoon; remained there until three o'clock Friday afternoon, when we left the place and pursued our way our way on the Grand Trunk railway. We stopped Friday night at Island Pond in Vermont, the first time, by the way, that I ever visited the Green mountain state.
We left Island Pond at seven o'clock Saturday morning, arrived at Portland,
Thursday my two uncles, Aunt Lydia and I went to see my Father's old relations. We went to see Uncle Colcord, Aunt Judy Morrill, Cousin Oliver Wadley and Aunt Jose Wadley, this occupied a whole day and when we arrived at home late in the evening I was very much tired.
The day following, which was Friday, we all rose early in the morning
and left for Dover, here we spent a day. We went to the print works, where
we saw the art of printing
Saturday we stayed at home and I busied myself with altering my travelling Dress. I had to make it at least a half an inch larger in the body.
Sunday Aunt Lydia attended morning service in the Methodist Church, we heard a sermon the text of which was taken from the gospel of St. John, sixth Chapter, 37th verse.
Monday, Aunt Satira and I went to visit some cousins in Haverhill. We spent the day with Mrs. Chase, and in the afternoon herself and husband took us out riding to see the town in general and their children in particular. It was night when we returned home, willing to rest ourselves by a comfortable night's sleep.
Tuesday, today, my Uncles and myself went to Concord, we spent two
or three hours very pleasantly there; after Uncle Moses had attended to
Since Tuesday we have had very bad weather until then it had been unusually pleasant, we had had nothing but sunshine, but Wednesday, Thursday, and today have been rainy, we have remained at home.
When I wrote in my journal last, I was not expecting to remain here until now, but we have been unavoidably detained day after day until October has come in and found us still here, but before many weeks have passed I expect to find myself in Georgia. The routine of our lives has been broken by visits to Exeter and Portland, by one letter from home, and by visits to a few of the neighbors.
Monday night Aunt Lydia and myself went to see Mr. and Mrs. Paul, they were at home and seemed glad to see me. Yesterday afternoon Aunt Lydia and I went into the schools of South Newmarket, there are three, but we only went into two the most advanced scholars in the place are taught by Miss Judkins; and the tiny little boys and girls by Miss Emily Smith. With the exception of these two calls I have been very busy indoors for the last few days making me a dress; it is my first attempt at dress making and it is quite hard work for me. I cannot write any longer now for I am anxious to finish my dress and must go to work.
Monday. October 10th /59 We are to leave here tomorrow morning at six o'clock
My Uncles Moses and Dole and myself left South Newmarket at twenty
minutes past six
We arrived at Boston at eight o'clock, and stopped at the American House, where we had an excellent dinner; we left for Worcester at about three o'clock In the afternoon. While in Boston both my Uncles had their Ambrotypes taken and gave them to me. Uncle Dole's is a very handsome picture and a perfect likeness, Uncle Moses' is a very good likeness but an imperfect picture, he is going to have another taken for me in Savannah.
We arrived in Worcester at about quarter of four o'clock, here there were no carriages in waiting at the depot, and in order to reach the stable we were obliged to ride in the only vehicle to be found which was an express wagon, accordingly we mounted up and drove through the principal street to the nearest stable, where we exchanged our wagon for a more suitable conveyance and drove out to Mr. Clark's residence two and a half miles from the center of the city but still within the corporated limits.
We found both Mr. Clark and his wife very well, and remained with them until about six o'clock when we returned to the depot and at seven o'clock were speeding on our way to Norwich, where we arrived at about ten o'clock and took the steamer for New York. We arrived here yesterday (Wednesday) morning at about eight o'clock, and are stopping at the Astor House.
After a few hours rest we went out to Barnum's Museum and spent some
time very pleasantly in looking at the
The second curiosity was a man, seven feet and some inches tall and perfectly proportioned he had no surplus flesh about, Uncle Dole felt of his arm and said that it was as solid as a rock, he seemed pleased to show his strength for he squeezed both my Uncle's hands until the fingers ached, he shook hands with me, but mercifully refrained from grasping my hand too firmly; we were told that he was from Arabia and belonged to some military company of Massachusetts.
From the Museum we went to Stewart's where I purchased some articles which Mother sent for, I could not however fill her order there and am going to Genin's bazaar this morning. My Uncles went out yesterday to secure state rooms for us, but they were all engaged except some in the lower cabin, and we are waiting for Grandma to come in order that she may choose between the steamer and the land route; it is time for her to be here and I cannot imagine why she does not come.
Grandma has arrived, they were detained by a fog this morning. We leave here at six this evening, and are going by the land route.
I went to Genin's this morning and bought two cloaks one for Miss Mary and one for Eva. I hope that the things will suit Mother.
Leaving New York Thursday the 13th, we went right on to Richmond Va. without stopping except to change cars. We passed through Trenton, Philadelphia, Wilmington, Havre de Grace, Baltimore and Washington. We passed through Washington early in the morning, in riding through the place we had a view of the Capitol, I thought it a splendid edifice but would have been much better satisfied if I could have gone inside and examined it.
At Washington we took the Steamer for Aquia, the Steamer was named Mt. Vernon. I always had a desire to see and travel upon the Potomac river and although this was far from being the most beautiful part yet I was much pleased with it, some day I hope to go as far up as Harper's Ferry.
We touched at Alexandria and passed by Mt. Vernon. Of the latter place we had a very good view, from the river, I thought the situation a very pretty one, I should like very much to visit the place.
At Aquia we took the cars again, crossed the Rappahannock and Pamunky rivers and arrived at Richmond at about two o'clock in the afternoon.
Although we stopped at Richmond at two o'clock in the afternoon and remained there until four the next morning, Grandma and I did not go out of the Exchange Hotel for we were very much fatigued and wished to rest.
Leaving Richmond in the cars at half past four Saturday morning we pursued our way through Virginia and the Carolinas.
I liked the country through North Carolina very well, we passed through that part in which turpentine is made.
South Carolina I did not like so well; Wilmington was the only city
which we passed through. We arrived at Augusta at about one o'clock Sunday
afternoon, and after eating dinner at the “Augusta Hotel” we left on the
I remained at Scarboro until Friday, when Aunt Mary and I went down to Savannah; we left here at about six o'clock, Friday evening and arrived at S. at half past nine. I went to the Pulaski House with Aunt Mary and spent the night, and in the morning we went out to Grandma's house. We had a long walk and were quite tired when we arrived there.
Grandma and Lois were both at home. I did not go out at all Saturday;
Sunday Lois and I went Sunday School and Church. Monday, we spent the morning
Tuesday morning just as we were sitting down to breakfast, Uncle Dole came to the door, I went up to open it for him, he had not time to come in, but we stood talking for some time, he said that Aunt Mary was going up that morning and that he would go up in the night, and that I must either go with Aunt Mary or alone, of course I chose to go with her.
We left Savannah at twelve o'clock Tuesday morning and arrived at Scarboro at about half past three o'clock in the afternoon.
I have not yet left Georgia, but it will not be many days before, for the third time, I turn my back upon this lovely state and face again the “far West”.
Last Friday Aunt Mary and I left Scarborough for Jefferson County, for
We spent Saturday and Sunday in Jefferson and left early Monday morning; but it will not do to pass over that eventful morning so briefly. Sunday was a very cold day and Sunday night of course still colder. Aunt Mary and I were afraid of being left and we rose perhaps a little earlier than necessary. At any rate we were up and dressed at twenty minutes of three. We then went into the parlor and searched for wood to make a fire; we had succeeded in kindling a little blaze over which we were warming our benumbed hands, when Uncle Dole entered the room, he went out for some wood and soon returned with an armful, which he threw on the andirons and we soon had a blazing fire. We spent about an hour in getting thoroughly warmed before we set out for the depot, well bundled up in shawls and blankets. Oh the horrors of that ride! they will never be effaced from my memory; the place where we had left the cars coming up, was not a regular station, and we had to ride to another, which was further off.
Imagine a ride of three miles over a road by turns sandy and rooty, before sunrise and in freezing weather, and you may form a faint idea of our feelings during that weary ride.
Uncle Dole drove us, and I think he deserves the highest praise for the exemplary patience with which he bore the cold and Jolts. But all things have an end, and at last we reached the station, and sitting by a fire in the warehouse we almost forget the discomforts we had endured.
The whistle of the engine was soon heard, and hastily stepping on the
train we said good morning to Uncle Dole, and were soon speeding on our way
towards Washington Co. Just as I was seating myself some one said “Good
At about seven o'clock we arrived at Robison's Turnout, and were met by
old General Robison, he took us up to his house, and after breakfast, Aunt
Mary and I exchanged our travelling dresses for
In the afternoon we went out to ride, we passed the old place on our way to one of the neighbors, how natural it looked. I almost stopped my breath as I gazed upon it, and imagined the past two years as a dream, and that we were once more at the dear old home, and I was but returning from a trip to Savannah. But no, we have left it forever and it is better so, but the tears will start when I think of the happy days I have spent there.
I would not go up to the house, to have seen it in the possession of strangers would have been more than I could bear, but I could not leave without going to the spring, the dear spring, every tree of which was a friend, every step of ground hallowed by remembrances of the past. I followed a little by path which led to the spring and which I had often traveled before, everything was perfectly familiar and I hastened on, picturing to myself how everything would look. At length I reached the little stream which ran down from the spring, crossed where I had often crossed before, and stood at the fence; could I be right? Could this wilderness of cane and underbrush be the beautiful spot which we had all loved and cherished so long? Yes, it was sadly changed indeed, but still the same; but why dwell upon my disappointment, why recount the sadness with which I viewed the change.
I ascended the hill, skirted the orchard and giving one last lingering
We remained at the General's until the next morning, and then left on the seven o'clock train. We arrived at Gordon at about eight, and Aunt Mary remained with me about four hours, when she returned home. My Uncles and myself leave here tomorrow night, I think that we shall go down the Alabama river.
We left Gordon, as we intended, on Thursday night. I am rejoiced to be again with my Uncles, and to be on my way to the loved ones at home; I am anxious to see them all again.
As I expected, we have come by the Alabama river, I think it is the pleasantest route, and am glad that my Uncles decided upon it.
The Coquette is a very good boat, but it is rather too much crowded. Uncle Moses was not able to get me a stateroom alone. Last night I had a very agreeable young lady with me, but she stopped at Selma, and I thought that I should be alone the rest of the way, but no, a number of passengers came on at Selma, and a lady with three children was put in my room; the lady although not very intelligent is neat and modest, and the children are pretty, well behaved little things, so that it is not so bad as it might be.
In travelling one must learn to bear little inconveniences patiently, or they can have but little enjoyment.
We arrived here at about one o'clock last night, and left the boat in time to eat breakfast. We are stopping at the Battle House.
When Father and I went to Georgia last year we stopped at this house,
a day, and I think I have the same room now that I had then, it is very nicely
I spent a very pleasant Sabbath yesterday, and if I were not so anxious to get home I should have been willing to have remained on the river longer.
I took up my journal book several times yesterday intending to write, but could not look off the beautiful scenery long enough to do so. We leave for New Orleans at one o'clock.
The Coquette is a very nice little boat, the fare is excellent and the waiters civil.
We left Mobile Monday afternoon at about two o'clock and arrived at New Orleans Tuesday morning the 8th, but as we were not in time to take the morning train up to Amite we were obliged to wait until night. After taking breakfast at the City Hotel, Uncle Moses hired a carriage and we drove round to Mrs. Martin's, 333 Magazine St. Here Uncle Moses left me, and rejoined Uncle Dole. I found Mrs. Garrett and her family at Mrs. Martin's, which was a surprise to me, for I did not know that they had removed to the City.
After spending an hour or two at Mrs. Martin's I went to Mrs. Garrett's and stayed there until after dinner, when I returned to Mrs. Martin's. I left at six o'clock for the depot, Miss Calwell, Miss Lou and Julia Waters accompanied me to the depot, where I bade them goodbye and went into the cars with My Uncles; when the cars stopped at Henner I was surprised and delighted to meet Father, he had received the despatch which Uncle Moses sent from N. O. and had come down to meet us.
We arrived at Amite at about half past ten, and found them all sitting up except Georgie.
The next day (the 9th) Father and Mother went down to N. O. taking Eva
and Lory with them. They stayed until Saturday (the 12th) when they returned
Monday morning Uncles Moses and Dole left for Vicksburg, they have just returned this afternoon. We expected Father and Mother also, but Mother was not able to come, Father went down to Independence, five miles below here, where he is having some cars built, and Willie has taken the buggy down, to bring him back. He is going to take the children up with him tomorrow.
Father took Miss Mary, Eva, Lory and George up to Vicksburg yesterday. This morning Uncle Moses went up, and this afternoon at three o'clock Uncle Dole left for Georgia. Miss Clark, Willie and I are here alone.
I expected that before this time we should all be up in Vicksburg, as it is, Willie and I are all that are left here. Father and Mother and the children are up in V. Miss Clark is down to the city on a visit, and Willie and I, as I said before, are still here.
I am staying at Mrs. Ridgill's, with Miss Valeria and have been here since Thursday, the day that Miss Clark went down, and have been expecting to receive a summons up to Vicksburg ever since Wednesday, but I have heard nothing from them as yet, and do not know how much longer I shall have to wait in expectancy. I hope to hear from them today.
Today is my birthday, I am fifteen. Two years ago today We were on the eve of moving from Georgia, and now I am expecting to move to Vicksburg in a few days.
At last I date my journal from our future home, it is very satisfactory
to feel that, for a few years at least, we can call some place home. Saturday
I had hardly reached the door when Angus called out, “Your Mother is here”. I did regard his words, for Angus is so full of frolic and mischief that I thought him joking, but smiled and bade him and Willie goodmorning, he then repeated his words and thinking it might be true my heart bounded suddenly, as I turned from one to the other. “You are not in earnest, Angus?” “Has she come Willie” they both assured me that they were in earnest and after gathering up my things, we said goodbye to the family and drove home.
At eleven o'clock I left Amite. I had a long lonely ride up to Jackson,
rendered sad by thoughts and recollections awakened by leaving Amite, and by
some recent events; I cheered myself, however, by thinking of the pleasant
meeting of Father and the children, and with this, and the unconsciousness
which sleep occasionally afforded, I did not get very much tired.
At about six o'clock we arrived at Jackson where I met Father, the ride from Jackson to Vicksburg was quite pleasant. We arrived at the depot at half past eight o'clock and as there were no carriages waiting we were obliged to walk up to the house, which is about a mile distant from the depot.
The children were all in bed and asleep except Miss Mary, who was sitting up for us. I should have written yesterday, but I was busy all day, unpacking my trunks and mending some things for the children.
The furniture has not come yet, so that I cannot describe my room, but I hope to be able to do so soon.
Last Saturday morning the last detachment of the family came up, and we are now all here; but there is still some furniture, bedding, and a great many other things to come, which are expected by the freight train tonight, some furniture from New Orleans came yesterday, and we hope to have everything here and get settled next week.
For the last week we have had some of the coldest, if not the coldest weather that I have ever experienced. Tuesday night it commenced to sleet at about six o'clock in the evening, and continued until midnight, between which and morning, there was a heavy fall of snow. When we arose and looked out, the piazzas and roofs of houses and the streets and gardens were all white, while the icicles hung from all the window sills; after breakfast the sun came out, for the first time in several days, and shone brightly, but although it continued to shine all day, the snow and ice did not melt, and the night being moonlight The spectacle was beautiful; I stood at my window admiring it until I was forced by the cold to retire. It is now three o'clock, and the ice is not melted yet. I must run to dinner now.
Friday——When I went to dinner yesterday I intended to come back after that important ceremony was over, and finish writing, but Miss Annie Horn, a young lady who dined with us, did not leave until it was nearly dark and so I postponed finishing until now.
The weather has moderated considerably since yesterday, the snow and ice has nearly all melted, this is the only snow I ever saw, which did not melt as soon as the noon came, it is quite a strange sight to me.
We were disappointed about our furniture from Amite, it did not come
last night. Wednesday morning Father received a despatch from Uncle David
saying that Uncle Dole was sick, unable to attend to his business, and that
Uncle Moses came over from the Swamp Friday night, he had received the despatch, and was very anxious about Uncle Dole; he was very anxious to see Father, but could not, as he had left early Friday morning on the pay train.
He remained with us until Saturday afternoon. As we were sitting at dinner Saturday, the wished despatch arrived, it read as follows, “Dole has typhoid fever, I do not think him dangerously ill”. Uncle Moses, though less anxious was still impatient to see his brother, and left at three o'clock, he expects to be in Georgia by the 14th of this month. Father came home Saturday night, he had met Uncle M. at Jackson.
Our freight from Amite has not yet arrived—.
Sunday we, that is Father, Mother, Mrs. Horn, Miss Annie and I, went to the Episcopal Church—
Here I have been interrupted by the arrival of some of our freight. I
am so very glad to have it come that I can write no more at present.
The week is now nearly closed and in the quiet of the evening hour I sit down to give an account of the week.
Willie has been sick in bed ever since Monday, yesterday and today he
has been better, he dressed this morning but was not able to sit up long,
he is so very weak. Thursday night George was taken very ill with the croup,
he is much better today, but is not quite recovered yet. We rec'd a telegraph
from Uncle Moses Wednesday saying that Uncle Dole was better. I believe that
Wednesday I unpacked all the boxes (9) and arranged the books, It was
dark when I finished. Thursday, Uncle Jim and Emmeline put up my wardrobe,
or just before
dark. Friday I spent in putting my work boxes, sewing trunk and scrap bag
in order, sewing on buttons, minding the baby and attending to Willie. My
room is now all in order, Father having screwed my glass on the bureau
this evening.
I will now proceed to describe my room, it has three front windows
opening on a balcony and facing the south, opposite the most westerly window
is a door leading into the hall, and opposite the most easterly is another
door opening the room which Grandma is to occupy when she comes. Our bed is
placed in front of the middle window so that it divides the room into
At the southern side is my dear bureau, my especial pet which I am very glad to have in my own room once more. In the western continent there is a wardrobe and a washstand. On each side of the bed there is a piece of carpet and a chair, one for Miss Mary, one for me, and beside each chair comfortably reposes a pair of dressing slippers.
I have longer than I meant to and the dark has overtaken before I have
Yesterday, Christmas day, it was fair and very pleasant weather. This is the first real Christmas that we have had for a long time, Christmas Eve, for the first time in three years I hang up my stocking by the side of the Chimney and dreamed of Christmas gifts all night, at four o'clock Miss Mary and I woke up and hearing the cock crow we thought it was morning so we woke up Rose after considerable calling; and, as there were no matches in our room she went into Miss Clark's for some, the first time she only brought one and as that did not light she went for a second supply, this time Miss Clark looked at her watch and sent word that it was not morning, but we concluded that at any rate we would get up.
Miss Mary first examined her presents, she found a very pretty little stove, the joint property of herself and Eva, one which they had seen in the store window and which they had admired very much; also a very pretty lamplighter stand, and a pair of little candlesticks.
I then lifted my paper, and what was my delight to find exposed to view
a beautiful book in English binding, entitled ‘The Waverly gallery’. The outside
was indeed beautiful, but when I opened and found it full of beautiful
engravings my feelings as the story books say “may be imagined but cannot be
described”. After inspecting the stove and the book to our satisfaction, Miss
Mary and I returned to bed, but not to sleep, for though I would willingly have
courted repose Miss Mary kept me awake by exclaiming constantly “Oh Sarah, let
me get up”, I shall be sick if I lie here much longer”, “I am sure it is
morning now” and sundry other observations too numerous to mention. At length
the wished for morning came, Rose made our fire and Miss Mary jumped out of
I have lingered so long over my description that the darkness is overtaking
me. We had Mr. Horne's family here to dinner and Mrs. Bason and Dr.
Young. Mother's table did credit to her housewifery and her market man, and
the
At sunset our guests dispersed, and the day ended as happily if not as merrily as it began.
Today has been a real rainy day. For some time we have heard nothing from
Uncle Dole, this afternoon Miss Clark received a letter from Uncle Moses
saying that he was very sick but he hoped not dangerously, it was dated the
18th / probably he is no worse or we should have had a telegraph——
I wished to close up my account of the old year before a new one came
in, but was unable to do so, because of other engagements. There is little
to record, however, save that we have had another week of cold weather, last
Friday night the 30th we had quite a snow storm, it was a beautiful sight,
which was presented to so pure and white and soft; New Year's day was clear but cold, the snow has
not melted yet.
Willie is now quite recovered from his illness. I received a letter from
Miss Mary and Eva commenced school at Mrs. Garland's today. Monday I commenced my Latin again. My piano has not been set up yet, so that I do not practice.
Last Thursday Willie and I left Vicksburg to pay our long deferred visit to Capt. Terry and as I had not written any here for some time I brought my book with me.
We had Father in company with us to this place, he went down to New Orleans. When we reached Jackson we met Capt. Terry there, very much to our surprise; his sister was sick and he had gone to get some ice for her; we arrived at Terry at about seven o'clock and bidding Father goodbye we stepped into a buggy which was in waiting and drove rapidly out to the Captain's house, which is about a mile distant from the depot.
We have spent a very pleasant week and are now ready to return in a few hours, today being the last which Mother allotted for our stay. Since we have been here the weather has been very fine. The last few evenings we have sat out upon the piazza as if it was summer.
Looking over my last journal I see that my piano had not then arrived, it came the next Saturday (7th) and was tuned the next week. I think that moving it so much has injured it somewhat.
I do not think that Uncle Moses has arrived yet, when we left Vicksburg they were expecting him daily.—
Willie and I arrived safely last night; Dr. and Mrs. Young were on the train with us.
Uncle Moses arrived here Monday morning (the 23rd) Uncle Dole was much better when he left. We found Father at home, he arrived Tuesday morning—
Uncle Moses came here today. Mother and Miss Clark were out and I was
the only one to see him, he stayed but a few moments and then returned to
the swamp, he will be here again Saturday. I was very glad to see him.
A letter came from Aunt Satira this morning, she says that Uncle Dole continues improving. I hope we will soon hear that he is well.
I have spent the day alone, Father is gone out on the Southern road,
and Mother and Miss Clark have been paying calls all day. Ella Reading a
neighbor of ours came to see me this afternoon, she is the first one who
has been to see me since we came here; but I do not want any acquaintances,
I fear I am becoming a little morose. I have never had many young acquaintances
and but very few have been friends.
Yesterday afternoon I accompanied Mother and Miss Clark to Mrs. Cook's she is a teacher of music and paintings; I enjoyed looking at her pictures, but was wicked enough to feel badly because I might never hope to equal her in music; I feel like giving up practising sometimes, the task is apparently hopeless, for I do not progress at all, and the two hours which I devote to it might be spent more profitably.
I looked back to see how long since I have written here, nearly a month; but
then I have had very little to write, and as long as I do not forget the
journal so much as not to record all important matters such as departures and
arrivals, it does not matter; I did not recollect that any one had departed
lately when I began, but I suppose I must file that as usual; Willie left us
No more acquaintances as yet, I shall enter my first caller with a full description that will be a perquisite of mine taken as a salvo for their tardiness.—
Miss Clark, Uncle Moses and I came down here Monday, we left Vicksburg at 7 o'clock in the morning and arrived at Jackson at ten minutes of ten. Uncle Moses obtained a carriage and we rode out to the insane asylum which is some distance out of town, from here we went to the penitentiary and state-house. The state-house is not a fine building, but Miss Clark and I were both very much pleased with the Asylum, the building was large, neat and airy, and the physician who showed us round seemed very kind to his patients, two of the female lunatics have pianos and were very fond of playing on them.
After eating a very good dinner at the hotel, we went down to the depot and left on the cars at a quarter of two o'clock, we arrived here at twelve in the night. The City hotel was very much crowded and if we had not had a room engaged we should probably have been obliged to have slept in the parlor.
Yesterday morning I came to Mrs. Garrett's where I now am, at about one o'clock. Miss Clark suffered very much all yesterday with headache, she spent the night here, but is out shopping this morning.
Father arrived here this morning, but I have not seen him, yet, he has
been to Meridian and came here by the way of Mobile. I went to a Jewish wedding
The marriage ceremony was neither as long or as imposing as I expected,
they said, however, that it was shortened because the bridal company did
not arrive until after sunset. The groom was married with his hat on, with
the exception of this and the drinking of wine, breaking the glass and
Hebrew chanting the ceremony was much like that of some Christian denominations.
The wine glass, after the bride and groom had drunk the wine, was
placed in a waiter upon the floor, and the bridegroom very
We came up Saturday night, and I have been, as usual, so busy that I have not before had time to record our arrival. I can now write no more.
This has been quite an eventful month, I have not kept my journal as regularly as perhaps I ought to have done, I will now square up the record.
It has been nearly two weeks since Uncle Dole and Grandma arrived here,
They soon arrived, and received from us all a warm welcome, Uncle Dole was and is quite weak, but I think him improved from his journey.
On the following Monday, Miss Clark and my two Uncles went over the river,
Miss Clark and Uncle Dole intending to go to Munroe, distant about eighty miles
Tuesday morning Father went out on the Southern railroad, taking with him Grandma, Miss Mary, Eva, and Lory. Mother and I were having a quiet time together when some one came in at the street door. Wondering who it could be, I looked out and saw Uncle Dole, at first I was alarmed, thinking that he was sick, but he said he was not, and when he was seated he told us that he thought himself unequal to such a long ride and leaving Miss Clark with Uncle Moses he returned.
Father and his party came back at night, Grandma liked the country very much, since she has been here we have rode all about town, she thinks it is rather too hilly here.
Uncle Moses and Miss Clark returned Thursday morning, they did not go to Munroe as the roads were too muddy, but turned back after going fifteen miles beyond the railroad.
I have a long story to tell, I may as well tell it now as later, for probably this book will not be read again until the last scene of the play is acted; but to commence at the beginning I must go back to my journey North, last summer.
I believe that in my journal for August I mentioned how particularly Uncle Dole noticed all the ladies, the further we proceeded on our journey and the more I became acquainted with my Uncle, the stronger became my conviction that he wanted to marry. But I will pass over my convictions, and relate only facts.
In my journal I have already mentioned my visit to Dover to see the print
works, but so briefly that I did not speak of the lady and gentleman who so
kindly accompanied us; they were Mr. and Mrs. Paul; after leaving the print-works
she might suit Uncle Dole; when he came up I repeated
the remark to him, “indeed!” said he, “you must tell Mrs. Paul to send me
her daguerreotype”.
Here the cars came up and bidding our friends goodbye we left Dover. I should have considered this all a jest and soon forgotten it, but not so Uncle Dole; he thought of it for some days, and then proposed that he and I should go back to Dover to see the young lady, whose name is Miss Lizzie Paice. But I declined, assuring him that Mrs. Paul would suspect his purpose if I went with him, and I recommended him to get Aunt Lydia to go; he did so, and they returned both very much pleased with her. Still, Uncle Dole would have left New Hampshire without seeing her again, for this was within a few days of our departure, had not a seeming accident thrown them together.
In my journal for this time, I only casually mentioned my Uncle's visit to Portland. Uncle Moses went to this place to get some carpenters to work upon a mill which they then thought of building in Mississippi, he completed his negotiations as nearly as possible and then returned; in a day or two a letter came to him from the men he thought he had engaged refusing to come out here, it then became necessary for one of the brothers to go to Portland again, and Uncle Moses urged Uncle Dole to go, at length he consented a little unwillingly, and went.
On his way back, when the train stopped at Dover, he thought of Miss Lizzie,
and looked out, a lady came in the cars who looked very much like her, he was
doubtful whether to speak to her or not, rose once to go, sat down again, and
again rose and went forward; it was Miss Lizzie, he stood and conversed with
But I must not stop to moralize, the precious moments are flying fast, and I am not yet through my story.
If I had thought that at the first meeting of these two, Cupid had discharged his arrows at my Uncle's heart, I was now sure that his aim had been true, and his shaft was firmly fixed.
But not yet had Uncle Dole consented to fall in love, he wished to
see a lady in Hudson city, opposite New York, before he decided, the young lady
had been highly recommended, may I use the expression?, by a friend of
his, (Miss Clark), and we delayed our departure in order that he might go
and see her, and then return to South Newmarket. He went, and returned,
Miss Lizzie Pierce had taken too firm a hold upon his affections, for Miss
Lizzie Green to be very prepossessing. During the week that followed, he
paid three visits to Portsmouth; for Miss Lizzie's school was suspended for
a time on account of a fair which was then held in Dover. When she returned
to D. Aunt Lydia and Uncle Dole paid a second visit to Mrs. Paul (?) and
Uncle Dole came back an engaged man.
This was Saturday night, Monday morning we left for Georgia, and here
for the present my story ends, for I shall record only facts, not feelings,
let my Uncle's confidence in me be sacred. In a few months, as soon as
Uncle Dole can go North without danger, he will claim Miss Lizzie Pierce
as his bride, and bring to me, not only an Aunt but a companion, for there is
but five years difference in our ages, she being little more than twenty.
The family of which Miss Lizzie is a member consists of a Mother and
In a letter from Aunt Lydia received about a month ago, she says,
“I have become considerably acquainted with Lizzie, and like her much,
she is amiable and has good sense. She was sorry she could not have seen
you when you were here. I think you will love her. She is a sweet singer,
and finally she is an accomplished girl”. I am almost sure I shall love her,
her sweet name attracts me, and there is something in a name.
Uncle left us for Georgia, day before yesterday (2), Miss Clark accompanied him to Canton, she returned last night. The Mr. Price who arrived here the 31st March, breakfasted with us yesterday, he is quite tall, taller than Father, stoops a little in the shoulders, with a large frame, black whiskers, edged with red, dark hair, an eye of light greyish blue, and a nose inclined to turn up. His family, consisting of a wife and two children, one four the other two years old, are at Gardener on the Kennebec. He left here yesterday afternoon on his way North, and is to return and take a contract on the Vicksburg and Shreveport railroad in about a month.
Today has been very warm.
One more member has been added to our family, a little baby boy was born this morning, he looks very much as Georgie did the first time I saw him, Mother is doing very well.
The warm weather continues.
Our baby is one week old today, he is still doing well and has grown
a good deal since his birth, his name is John Everingham, he is named for
Emmeline had a baby last night, it is a boy. Miss Clark and Uncle Moses went out to Morton this morning, they expect to return tomorrow night.
Mother and the baby still do very well, I am housekeeper now, and have much to occupy me.
We all continue as well as usual. Mother begins to sit up a little. Father has gone away to New Orleans and will be back Tuesday. Miss Clark is going to Munroe with Uncle Moses Monday; they will be gone nearly two weeks. I received a letter from Aunt Lydia a few days ago, she has been to Dover to see Miss Lizzie, and likes her more than ever, Oh how impatient I am to see her!
Miss Clark and Uncle Moses left us for Munroe Wednesday last, they returned today, having spent a week in journeying there, and back again.
I went out to a picnic yesterday, took Miss Mary, Eva, and Lory, the day was very tedious and I was heartily glad to get back home.
Uncle Moses received a letter from Uncle Dole today, he says that Miss Lizzie has given up her school.
Mother is not very well today she has taken cold and has had a bad headache all day, she has not been out of her room yet; the baby is doing finely.
The weather has become warm again and I am very glad of it.
Grandma, Willie and Miss Clark went down to Terry yesterday morning,
we expect them back tonight. Ma went out to dinner yesterday and will go out
Grandma, Willie and I have just returned from the swamp, we went over Wednesday, and spent our time very pleasantly until this morning at seven o'clock when we left for Mississippi again.
Father, Mr. Horne, General and Dr. Myrick and Mr. Compton (the three last from Georgia) went out yesterday, we saw them this morning.
Grandma, Uncle Moses and Miss Clark expect to leave next Monday, I am prepared to have them defer their departure however, for Miss C. and Uncle Moses intended to leave a week ago.
Mother has gone to spend the day with Mrs. Horne she has taken the baby with her. Emmeline has come into the house again.
They all left today, I have just returned from the boat, whither I went to bid them goodbye, they went on the Vicksburg, it is considered a fine boat and I dare say they will have a pleasant passage down the river; Miss Clark has been expecting to go so long that it seems a relief to have her off; although we shall at first feel a little lonely I think it best for our family to be alone for awhile.
Willie will leave us soon to go out in the world, and act for himself, he is only nineteen but he is a man in stature and appearance, he has for a year been wishing to go to work, and last week Father concluded that he had best not go to planting yet as he was so young, and moreover Father is not able to give him a plantation, so it is settled that he is to contract for grading, on the Vicksburg, Shreveport and Texas railroad.
Pierce Horne and Dr. Myrick are to form a partnership with him, to buy
the mules and carts
They will commence in October, in the meantime Willie will be occupied in getting his things ready, and he expects also to go to Georgia.
This seems an eventful Spring, I look forward and everything is wrapped in uncertainty, I expect we shall move somewhere near Willie. Father says he cannot afford to live in a town at present, but I will not anticipate.
It is well for us that we cannot lift the veil that shrouds the future;
Willie will commence now where Father was twenty years ago. God grant that
when he is thirty nine he may be as far advanced, in honour and in prosperity
as is my loved and respected parent.
Miss Lizzie Pierce's brother, (the one who has been with Uncle Moses all winter) was here this morning he resembles his elder brother somewhat, but is better looking and not so tall.
Emmeline has been packing away the winter clothing this morning, and Mother has been cleaning up closets, in about two weeks we shall get settled for the summer.
Father went out on the Southern road this morning, he will be back tomorrow night.
I commenced my lessons yesterday, for the present I shall only study Arithmetic and Latin.
Father went down to New Orleans Sunday evening, he will be absent a week. The weather is quite warm and more settled than it has been before.
Father received a letter from Uncle Moses on Saturday, they were then at New Orleans but intended leaving for Mobile the next day. I suppose they are now in Georgia, Aunt Mary writes that she is expecting Miss Clark to spend a week with her.
I have been busy studying and practising ever since I commenced my Lessons. I like my teacher in Arithmetic and Latin very much and think him an excellent teacher, his name is Burr, he is the gentleman who taught Willie, I recite three times a week. I took my second music lesson this morning, my music teacher, Mr. Eaton, also understands his profession, but I am not pleased with him in other respects.
Willie went down to Amite on Monday, Miss Valeria Ridgill is coming back with him. He intended to remain until Saturday but I wrote him today to return, and expect that he will be back Friday.
General Robison, from Georgia, is coming here tomorrow evening, his servant and baggage arrived here this morning, but he met Father on the road and went to Morton with him.
Went to Church this morning and heard an excellent sermon upon religion and its offices.
I received a letter from Uncle Dole dated the 23rd, the travellers had arrived. Uncle Dole writes that Miss Lizzie is taking music lessons in Portland.
Willie arrived Thursday night, but Miss Valeria did not come.
Mr. Horne and family left for Georgia on Thursday, May 31st.
Father came up from Independence a week ago today and brought Miss Valeria up with him. Since then we have been busily employed in riding out to see the beauties of Vicksburg, altogether we have had quite a gay week. Mr. Raoul, from Independence, Mr. Greene, Father's assistant on the Southern road and Mr. Horne have all been here, and Mr. Greene will return tonight.
Mr. Eaton, my music teacher, has just finished giving me a lesson, I am
Miss Clark was in New York on the 14th we shall soon receive a letter from Worcester. Mr. Burr asked me a few days since when she was to be married, I told him that I had no idea when; every body here seems to consider the matter as settled.
I am looking to a general settling of things this summer, every day I watch eagerly for letters expecting to hear of one more chapter in the two romances which are in progress.
Mr. Pierce (the elder) was here yesterday his younger brother, whose name is Elbridge, is sick with the swamp fever, but is getting well now. Mother invited him to come over here and spend a few days, until he became perfectly well.
Miss Valeria, Willie, Miss Mary, Eva and I went to the Catholic Church Sunday evening to hear vespers, but the singing was not at all fine.
Father has gone, he left us yesterday and will be gone until the tenth of next month, he has left the road in charge of Mr. Greene, who will be in Vicksburg about once a week during Father's absence and will probably stop here. Mr. Elbridge Pierce has accepted Mother's invitation and came in today, he is looking very badly indeed, and seems quite melancholy.
Captain Terry, his wife and daughter Carrie came here day before yesterday and left yesterday afternoon, their daughter Jane has arrived at home to spend her vacation of two months, their son Joseph, or Tump as they call him, will be home in a week or two.
Miss Valeria left us this morning we were reluctant to let her go, but
she was getting anxious to see her family and thought that she could not remain
any longer; she had been here nearly two weeks but it did not seem so long
Dr. Balfour came to see Mr. Pierce this morning, he said that he could not be too careful of himself, as the swamp doctors had treated his case imprudently.
Just a week today since Mr. Pierce came; and eight days since Father left us, Oh what a long, long week it has been to me, it seems as if the two weeks which must pass before Father returns, are too long to look forward to. Mr. Pierce has improved very much and is still improving, he is still rather weak, however; he is much more talkative than when he came, and speaks a great deal of his family, especially his sister Lizzie, he seems to be very fond of his family.
Mother received a letter from Miss Clark dated the 16th. Miss Clark and Uncle Moses had arrived, at Worcester, the day before, and Uncle Moses had left that morning for South Newmarket.
I took the last lesson that I am to have in latin this summer, yesterday; my vacation had now commenced and I shall have no school duties, except practising, for two months, during this time I hope to read more than I have for some time past.
My dear Father has been sick since he left us, he had chills and fever in Philadelphia, but was only delayed by it three days at the end of which time he went on to New Hampshire.
Mr. Elbridge Pierce has been over in the swamp a week, on Monday he brought over his elder brother who has also been sick with the swamp fever. He (Mr. George Pierce) has been here ever since, his brother returned today and they will probably both leave us tomorrow evening.
Uncle Dole will leave Georgia for New Hampshire on the 15th of this
Our weather is now oppressively warm, and the
Another letter from my dear Father this morning, and also one from
Uncle Dole, both full of interest to us. My dear Aunt Lydia is very sick,
her disease is a cancer in the mouthhad been
dangerously ill but was then out of danger and slowly improving. My poor
Aunt, she is of a warm, affectionate disposition and the removal of her
sister from New Hampshire was too much for her. I fear it will be long ere
she regains even that partial health which it has always been her portion
to bear.
But I must also speak of other items in Father's letter, he said that
he found Cousin Abbie Colcord, Uncle Moses and, Miss Clark at Aunt Lydia's
and that he was never more surprised than when he met Miss C. at the door,
no wonder, peculiar as she is I should never have expected that step from
her. Uncle Moses had telegraphed for Aunt Satira and Grandma and they left
Savannah on the 30th so we learned from Uncle Dole's letter; they are no
doubt with her long before this.
Father said that if Aunt Lydia continued to improve he would leave New
Hampshire on Tuesday, nearly a week ago. Uncle Dole said that Aunt Mary and
her children had gone North
Father has arrived, he came Saturday night, and he brought me such a
beautiful present it is an elegant paint box fitted with every convenience,
it contains eighteen Crayons and is made of rose wood, it is about a foot
long and nearly as wide. Every one of us children had a pretty, appropriate
present. Mother's was a grenadine dress, a workbag, and a
Father and Mother have concluded that we had better not spend the summer
here; we are to go to Cohuttah Springs, Murray County Georgia, until
cold weather. The fever is said to be in New Orleans and if it is it will
probably come here. Cohuttah Springs is not a fashionable place but is very
cool and healthy, being at the foot of one of the mountains of the
Mr. Elbridge Pismo is sick again, he came over last week, Dr. Balfour says that he must go north immediately, but he does not wish to go until his brother closes up their business at the Macon, which will probably be in about a week, so that he will go on with us.
We leave for Cohutta on Monday.
We arrived here on Thursday, and after a rather adventurous trip were glad to arrive where we could rest from the fatigue of travelling.
Father came with us to Canton Mississippi, where he left us and returned
to Vicksburg, we came on with Mr. Horne and Willie for escorts, but Willie
afforded us very little assistance. When we left Vicksburg he complained of
a very bad headache and had a little fever, but Mother thought that it
would pass away in a few hours and as she had all her things ready she did
not wish to postpone leaving, but his headache did not get any better. We
could not go any further than Chattanooga, we arrived there
at one o'clock and took rooms in the Hotel, Mr. Horne went on.
Wednesday morning Mother gave Willie a purgative but he did not get much better, the Hotel at Chattanooga is very badly kept and we were all very uncomfortable. Mother sent for the proprietor in order to try and learn something about the stages between Dalton and Cohuttah. While she was in the parlor waiting for him, a little girl came in, seeing that she was alone Mother asked her if she lived at the Hotel she said that she lived in Georgia. Mother then asked in what part of Georgia, she answered Dalton; this interested Mother, and thinking that she might ascertain something about the stages from this source, she asked her a few more questions and found that she was travelling with her Uncle. The little girl said that she would ask her Uncle to come in and see Mother, and that he could tell her all about the stages; he soon came in, he is a young man about twenty eight or thirty years old, has a very honest face and polite manners, his name is John Owen, and he lives in Winchester Tennessee. Now I have always entertained a prejudice against Tennesseans, I have always thought them coarse and rough, but hereafter I shall have a better opinion of them.
Mr. Owen was very kind, he gave Mother all the information that she
wished, and even offered to take charge of her family and baggage as far as
Dalton, Mother thanked him, but said she hoped that Willie might be well
enough to take care of us, but in the afternoon Willie was hardly able to go
on the cars, much less to take any care of the baggage, so we were obliged
When we arrived at Dalton Willie seemed very much better, and after a
We had two hacks and a baggage waggon, for the first hour or two we were quite happy in the thoughts that we were near our journey's end and that we were once more in Georgia, but after that we were very quiet.
The road until within about five miles of the Springs was tolerably level, and smooth, but after that we began to got into the mountains and had a number of jolts. We left Dalton at half past six in the morning, and arrived here at half past twelve.
The house here is situated at the foot, not of one mountain, but of several, it is quite a romantic situation being surrounded by mountains on all sides, with only an opening for a road in front, and a little stream running over the rocks about a hundred or fifty yards distant.
The principal spring is situated nearly at the foot of the mountain at
one side of the house, but there are others scattered around, there is a very
pretty path leading to a
There are four families here, two are in the hotel and the others are spending the summer in some cabins a few yards off. Miss Julia Rucker a very pleasant young lady is also spending the summer here. The Miss Underwoods are also very pleasant, they are in one of the cabins with their family. There is also another young lady a Miss Morriss, (one of the occupants of the other cabin) whom I have not yet seen.
The
Yesterday afternoon a party of us went up on the mountain, there were four young ladies, three gentlemen and a number of younger girls. We had a very pleasant walk up and had beautiful views from several points; a lovely little valley covered with green grass and corn lay at our feet while the thickly wooded hills and beyond them the lofty mountains rising above each other till the most distant formed a blue line against the sky, formed a beautiful frame for the smiling picture below us.
The day is now nearly closed, and I sit down to review my conduct on
this, the first Sabbath that I have ever spent at Cohuttah. I began the day
rather badly, by being late at breakfast, the Hotel was so much more quiet
than usual, that after I was waked up by the chambermaid bringing in water,
I went to sleep again and did not wake until quite late. And after breakfast
I took Georgie and went down to the Spring thinking that I would find a cool
and retired place to sit and think, what was my surprise when I saw the
benches filled with ladies, gentlemen, and children, it was a pretty scene,
the ladies in their pink and white dresses with picturesque hats, and gentlemen
Thinking that I might spend the Sabbath more profitably I returned to the house but had such a headache that I was obliged to lie down. After resting about an hour I was aroused from my reverie by Miss Helen who came to bring me a rock which she had found. I went out into the hall and talked with her sister, Miss Lou until they went home, when I returned to my room and read the morning service until summoned to dinner; since then I have been employed in attending to Willie and George.
And now let me close my journal of the day by transcribing this beautiful and appropriate hymn.
I am learning to play chess, Miss Helen Underwood is teaching me. I
forgot to mention in my Saturday's journal that Mr. Elbridge Pierce was too
ill to come with us, both he and his brother were sick when we left, we
have not heard from them since. Referring to them makes me sad, it makes me
think of my dear Aunt, so often when I feel a little gay and am talking with
some a thought of her will come over me, and I am sad, oh! how dreadful to
feel that one has been taken from a hitherto unbroken circle of
Willie is now much better, he went down to breakfast this morning. I am not well myself but I hope it is merely fatigue from my journey, and will soon pass away.
I have written two letters today, and practised a little, the first I have practised since we came here. Miss Helen Underwood lent a music book of hers the other day, and as I was looking over it this morning I found a beautiful song, it is entitled the Erl king which signifies in English, death. The idea of the son pleading with the Father to save him is very touching, I will copy it below.
I spent today in writing letters to send by Willie tomorrow; for Willie is to leave us tomorrow, he is now perfectly recovered and he cannot be content to stay here any longer. I am very sorry that he must leave us but he goes for his own pleasure, therefore it is not so hard to bid him goodbye.
We are now having very cold weather for August, it rained all day Sunday, and yesterday morning it cleared off quite cold, after breakfast we were all so chilled that I proposed a game of blind man's buff to warm us. We all went down into the ballrooms, called Willie and Mr. Woodburn (a young student who is spending his vacation here) and had a good play, pretty soon Miss Helen and Miss Lou Underwood came in and joined us, after exercising for an hour or two we went up into the parlour and played more quiet games. Miss Helen and Mr. Bell played cards, Miss Lou and I chess, and Willie and Florence Illges draughts, the rest looked on at the games so that we had three little circles in the room. After Miss Lou and Miss Helen left; Mr. McJunkin and I played chess until we were called to dinner; Mr. McJunkin is private secretary to Mr. Alex. Stephens; he is a very pleasant gentleman.
In the afternoon we took a long walk, we went to the post office, a mile and a quarter from here; on the way back the sun was setting behind us, the air was cool and pleasant and overhead the sky was that greyish blue which distinguishes it in warm winter days.
I was forcibly reminded of those lines of Bryant's
for although this is August it seems very such like Autumn to me, even
the wind as it blows through the trees reminds me of Autumn.
Today, as I said before, I have passed in writing letters, I have also
But I must now close, I fell down yesterday while playing and feel quite stiff today, writing so much has made my arm Lame.
Willie left us yesterday morning very early; we miss him so much, it
seems as if he had been gone a week instead of a day.
We moved downstairs yesterday, and find our new rooms very comfortable
now, though I am afraid they will prove a little too open in really cold
weather. They are not ceiled at all, and have only a thin partition between
them, which does not reach all the way up, so that a conversation can be
carried on with ease by persons in different rooms. This makes no difference
with us, on the contrary it is rath
I must now close, as the first bell has rung for dinner.
I have so much news to write that I scarcely know where to begin; in the first place we received a mail from the Cohuttah post office this morning, and as all my news is contained in these letters, this is the most important item. We had three letters, one from Pa, one from Aunt Satira, and the other for me from Miss Ginnie Calwell. Pa says that Mr. and Mrs. Rigby (from Vicksburg) are coming to Cohuttah Springs, but if they come, I do not think they will stay, Cohuttah is too quiet a place for Mrs. Rigby.
Miss Ginnie writes that Mrs. Garrett's house has been burned, and every thing lost, I am very sorry. Miss Ginnie also says that it is so very warm in Amite they cannot sleep, but have often sat up all night on the piazza.
And last and greatest of all, Uncle Moses is at length married, Aunt Satira
writes that they had been married a week when she wrote; alas! my new Aunt
cannot fill the place of the one I have lost. But this is not a fit marriage
The weather is now quite warm, this is the first oppressive day we
have had for a week.
It is three weeks today since we left home, but it seems a much longer time to me. I have spent it quite pleasantly however.
Mr. McJunkin is going to leave us on Wednesday, we shall all miss him very much for he is the only pleasant young gentleman here. Mr. Woodburn is not at all agreeable.
I rode out this morning with a very pleasant old gentleman, Mr. Ross, he and his wife are here spending the summer, or a part of it, at the springs, they came for the health of Mrs. Ross who is an invalid. Mr. Ross brought his horse and buggy with him, and has take all the young ladies out to ride, today he said that it was my turn.
We had a very pleasant drive of about two miles, and stopped nearly an hour at the house of Mr. McKamy, where we had some delicious fruit; while we were there Mr. Lough Miller came driving up with his hack full of ladies whom he had brought out for a ride, they were Mother, Mrs. Hammond, Mrs. Lough Miller, and Mrs. Field.
Mother promised this morning to send Mrs. Ross a recipe, I put it down here so that it shall not be forgotten.
I feel quite lonely this morning, five of our company have left us. Mr.
McJunkin is gone I felt very sorry to part with him, he said that he would
come out west in the winter and that he might meet us again, poor young man,
Mr. and Mrs. Ross left us this morning, they do not expect to return, but there is a possibility that they may, I wish they would, they are so genial and agreeable that we shall miss them very much indeed. The other two departures were those of Mrs. Loughmiller and her sister Miss Vernon who has been spending a few days here. Mrs. Loughmiller will return again in a few days.
Mrs. Hammond went away yesterday evening, she has gone to see her sister and will come back on Monday.
And now that there are so many departures I must record one arrival, which I had forgotten before, a family came here on Saturday, they have rented one of the cabins and expect to spend the summer here, I believe. There is a young lady in the family, Miss Julia, and I intend to call upon her today. We should have done it before, but did not have time while Mr. McJunkin was here, as we had to write some letters to send by him.
I received a letter from Willie Monday afternoon, he had arrived safely at General Robison's and was enjoying himself very much indeed, he said that Uncle Davie had gone North. Mother and I also received a letter each from Father; he was well, and was about to set out upon a trip to Shreveport.
Mr. and Mrs. Horne were here yesterday to spend the day; they went to Dalton the morning we left, and arrived after we had been gone about half an hour. Mr. Horne is going to start for New York tomorrow, and will take Miss Annie with him.
I went down to see Miss Cobb this morning, she is quite pleasant though not so much so as her sister Mrs. Wilkes; Mrs. W. is in very delicate health but has improved a great deal since she came here.
Mrs. Field left us this morning, she does not think that she will return any more. A family came to the Hotel last night, I have not become acquainted with them yet. Miss Julia Rucker has been rather unwell for the last two days, she has not been in bed, but is in very low spirits, she seems to have something upon her mind. I must go up stairs now and see if I can cheer her up a little.
Miss Helen and Miss Lou Underwood have been spending this week at Dalton, they are expected back today. I shall be very glad to see them for Miss Julia and I have missed them very much this week.
We had a delightful walk yesterday afternoon, indeed a more proper name
for it would be a scramble, for it was more of a scramble than a walk. Mr.
Loughmiller was our guide, he undertook to show us some falls which he said
were on the side of the mountain, going past the mineral springs we stopped
there to drink some water, and to get all our party together. As we started,
Mr. Bell went behind with Miss Julia and I called Mr. Wurley to come on with
Miss Lizzie Cobb and I, thus Mr. Woodburn was left without a companion and
he fell back in the rear. I am afraid I hurt his feelings but he is such a
disagreeable companion that I could not bear to have him along with me; this
morning he left the breakfast table very soon and as he was going out Mother
called to him and said “Mr. Woodburn, the water seems to lessen rather than
increase your appetite”, he never made any reply but walked on straight out
of the room, he is really the most singular man I ever saw. I avoid him as
much as I can without being positively rude. But how have I digressed from
my description of our walk.
We went on up to the freestone spring and a little beyond, when Mr.
Loughmiller said “Yonder is the place where the falls were, but the branch is
On the other side that charming little valley which I spoke of before
lay surrounded by ranges of mountains and dotted with little hills and clumps
of trees. Mr. Bell and Mr. Wurley tried which could throw stones the farthest,
and we watched them until the glories of the setting sun admonished us to return;
taking a more
I gathered a
Supper was exceedingly welcome to us, fried chicken and hot shortcake
Can any one imagine who came this morning? It is almost impossible, so I will tell, it was Mr. McJunkin. Oh! I was so much surprised and excited that I now feel quite weak, I did not think that he would come back here again. He looks very much better than he did when he went away, he says that he went all around,—to Cotoosa, Lookout and Stone mountains and to Atlanta, and that he felt much more at home here than anywhere else.
This has been quite a lonely day, Miss Helen, Miss Julia, Florence Illges, and Florence Underwood, and Messrs McJunkin and Bell have all gone to the camp meeting; Miss Lou and I staid at home from choice, we have been together nearly all day; for we wish to spend the last day we have as much together as possible. Miss Lou and Miss Helen with their sisters Florence and Ida are going home tomorrow, we shall miss them very much. We shall soon be alone here, for Mrs. Illges is going next week and she will take Miss Julia with her.
Mrs. Illges has had a great disagreement (to call it by no harsher name) with Miss Lizzie, the housekeeper here, and she does not wish to stay any longer than she can help.
—I have just turned back and been reading my last summer's journal,
her name and think
that nevermore shall I hear the soft tones of her voice or look into those
loving eyes, the expression of which was but the index of her warm heart,
ever throbbing with love for me. Oh! would that I could walk in the path
which she trod, that her beautiful nature might fall as a mantle on my
shoulders; my God give me strength to act so as to meet her in that bright
happy realm to which she has gone; O God guide her motherless children, thou
who hast called little children to thee take them in thy arms and protect
them from every storm.
Miss Helen and Miss Lou with their two sisters left as they expected, Mr. Woodburn and Mr. Bell went with them. I felt sad to part with them all, except Mr. Woodburn, and I was really glad to see him go.
Well, we are nearly alone now, Mrs. Illges and her family and Mr. McJunkins left us yesterday. It was hard to part with them, and I miss them very much, but I daresay it is better for us to be here alone . Tuesday night we all sat up until nearly midnight dancing and playing games. Mr. Bell brought the hack for Mrs. Illges so we had one addition to our party. I was not at all sleepy and could have sat up all night, even after I had retired I lay awake a long time and woke up before daylight in the morning. I dressed myself and Miss Julia and I went down to the spring, whither we were soon followed by Miss Mary and Florence Illges. We had sat there some time when Mr. McJunkin came up, and we were soon after called to breakfast.—
I took my first lessons in shooting the other day. Miss Julia, Mr. Mc
Junkin and I were up at the spring when Mr. McJ. asked us if we would not
like to shoot. Upon our answering in the affirmative he put his hand in his
breast and took out a pistol, I confess I was a little startled when it
Dr. Hammond has been quite unwell all day, Mother as Mr. Wilkes to go for Mrs. Hammond this afternoon and we are expecting them every moment.
Mrs. Underwood's waggon came today, she is going to leave tomorrow. Mrs. Cobb's son also came this evening, they will start away tomorrow. Mr. Wurley, who has been all the week at the camp meeting came back this evening with Mr. Cobb.
Well! all have gone and left us, the Underwoods and Cobbs both went
Friday. We share the hotel with Dr. and Mrs. Hammond, the only regular boarders
here except ourselves, by the way the Dr. is still quite unwell, but has improved
since his wife came. We have had one topic for conversation ever since
Mrs. Illges and her party left, this is the nature of the attention paid by
Mr. McJunkin to Miss Julia. There are three opinions, Mrs. and Mr. Loughmiller
and Mr. Wurley think that they are in love and will marry, Ma thinks that Mr.
McJunkin sees that Miss Julia likes gentlemen's attention and is flirting with
her, Mrs. Hammond and I do not see that Mr. McJunkin has paid Miss Julia any
particular attention. I had formed a higher opinion of Mr. McJ. than that he
is a male flirt and I cannot—I was about to say I will not—believe it. I
did not think that he paid her any more attention than he did the other young
ladies here, the only thing that I cannot explain to myself is one circumstance,
when Mrs. Illges left she and her family, including Miss Julia went in the hack
We all went up on the mountain yesterday evening, all the white people that more left at home were Mr. Loughmiller and the little children. Mother stood the walk better than I expected, but is very much tired today.
Who do you think we found here when we came back to the house? Mr. Woodburn! the last person in the world I should have wished to see, but my displeasure at his coming was considerably mollified when he handed me a letter from my beloved Father. Father says that he picked up several little rocks for me in Texas, oh! how my heart ran over with love for him when I read that, even when far off in Texas on a business tour he recollected my peculiarities, and gentle and loving as he always is he brought back a memento for me, those little rooks are dearer to me than the costliest gift he could have procured, for they show that he does not disdain to humour his little daughter's oddities even when in the midst of business.
But the dinner bell has rung and I must away.—
I am going down to the spring to spend the evening in reading, but
before I go I want to note down one thing. Father said that he had received
a letter from Uncle Dole, saying that he would be married soon, this is very
different from the conduct of Uncle Moses and Miss Clark, who never have
given us the slightest intimation of their marriage. Mother received a letter
from her, signed “M. J. W.” but not speaking of the marriage or making any
Mr. Woodburn has gone, he left this morning, he seemed very nervous
and looked rather sad at leaving, I was sorry for him, but I must confess
I was glad of his departure. He asked me to
This is a “misty morning” my hands and feet were so cold that I had a fire kindled in my room and am now sitting by it.
I had just finished writing the above on Monday when we were all gladdened by the sight of a hack coming down the road, and we were still more glad when we recognized General Robison and Grandma and the occupants. Grandma is thinner than when I saw her last, but she is not sick at present.
The General went away yesterday, he said that he had never missed attending the superior court and could not now, so he just stopped long enough to tell us the news and then went off.
We are having delightful weather now, so cool and bracing. I have just returned from a ramble in the woods, and feel as if I had a new life in me, when I first came here and for some time before, I felt depressed and weak, and thought (does it not seem strange?) that I was beginning to lose the freshness and vigor of youth, but now the blood courses swiftly through my veins and the bright hue of health is beginning to come into my usually pale cheeks. I am sure I have no reason to be dissatisfied with Cohuttah, nor am I, I have enjoyed myself here, and hope I may sometime come here again.
Mrs. Hammond left yesterday, I was very sorry to tell her goodbye, she may come back again, however.
Grandma, Dr. Hammond and Miss Lizzie (the housekeeper) all went away this morning, we are now quite alone, with the exception of Mrs. Loughmiller, who is quite a pleasant lady. Two gentlemen came this evening to measure some land, they are going away in the morning, however.
Today was Monday, and of course we all looked eagerly for the mail and received it joyfully when it arrived, it was an unusually large mail today, and contained interesting letters and papers from various parts of the union,
But before I give an abstract of the news, I must speak of an adventure we had yesterday; in the afternoon we all went out to take a walk over the mountain, one of the mountains which we had not visited before, we arrived at the summit after a short walk and stopped to rest awhile and look at a very pleasant view which was spread out before us, at length we started down and as none of us knew the way (Mrs. Loughmiller and her little Lizzie were the only ones in the party besides our family) Mother began to entertain fears lest we should have some trouble about getting
I sprang forward and with my usual impetuosity plunged through the bushes
until I arrived at a point from which I could see the path and the little
stream which runs along through the hollow, here I shouted to the others and
they soon came in sight, I then went on in the plain cart road and having
no obstacles in the shape of mountains to contend with my thoughts pursued
that calm and tranquil way which is in unison with the character of the
Sabbath, and I walked, my hands folded behind me and my eyes elevated from
the ground. In this calm mood and composed situation what was my surprise, nay
more properly my horror and terror at seeing stretched across the road , its
head elevated upon a small stone, a large black snake! Now I instinctively
I have detailed our adventure so minutely that I have not much more time to write, and fear I must defer mentioning the contents of my letters until tomorrow, however, I will write a little longer as I shall have to answer my letters tomorrow and will not have time to journalize.
In the first place I received a letter from my dear Father in which,
besides telling us of his health he says that he expects to come for us about
the 4th of next month, he also says that Mr. Green came to our house the night
before with a chill on him, that he had not seen him that morning and therefore
did not how he was; Father was on the point of leaving for New Orleans
and only wrote a few lines. I received a letter from Willie, he is still well,
he says that Aunt Satira has arrived at Scarborough, and that Uncles David
Mother received a note and paper from Mr. Woodburn, also a book which she requested him to send. My surprise was great upon finding in the mail a package directed to me and postmarked ‘Columbia, ‘So. Carolina. Upon opening it I found a very pretty copy of Childe Harold with the words written on the fly leaf through the respect of a friend”. I was sorry to have the book from him, but of course it was not to be helped.
I forgot to mention that Mother received Uncle Moses' cards two weeks ago, today she had a letter from Miss Clark.
I have begun the month badly, I was so weak this morning when I first rose, that I was obliged to go to bed again. I dressed myself after drinking a cup of coffee and been sewing all the morning, still I feel very badly and am scarcely able to stand up. I am waiting rather impatiently for the mail, and to make the time pass more quickly I am going down to the spring.
Mother received a letter from Father yesterday, he says that he expects
to leave about the 5th or 6th of the month and that we will probably be in
Vicksburg about the 15th. I was disappointed in not receiving a letter from
poetry from Mr. Woodburn.
In one of her letters Mother jestingly asked Father how he would like
a minister for a from metaphysics to which I think she is
rather too much inclined.
Neither my Father nor Mother have a cause to fear lest I should make an unwise choice, for I intend to pass a single life and to prove false the sentence “If matrimony have many trials, celibacy has no pleasures”. This is not a romantic maiden's vow, but it tis a conclusion to which I have come after sober thought. I think it would be wrong for me to marry, my health, or more properly my constitution is too feeble to sustain the burden which a wife and Mother must bear. I know too well the disappointments attendant upon a feeble constitution to wish to entail them upon another generation sprung from me.
A Miss Lizzie Keany came here this morning she has been sick nearly two months, and had to be carried to her room. She lives in Jackson, Miss. but went to spend her vacation with one of the Miss Edmondson's of Spring place, she was taken sick the day after her arrival, and has been confined to her room ever since.
Father came yesterday morning, I was so much delighted, we all (all
of us children) walked nearly up to the store to meet him, and at every
turn of the fence we wished that a buggy would come in sight, we had turned
This morning after breakfast Father took all of us except Georgie and went to walk, intending to try to go to where they are picking chestnuts out in the mountains. We walked about five miles and back, making ten in all. I never should have thought I could walk so far, we were back to dinner at one o'clock, we gathered about a gallon of chestnuts, but did not go to where they are very plenty.
Monday night the weather turned quite cold, and last night we expected frost, it is now warmer.
Oh! the weather is so cold. I have been shivering nearly all day, the
sky looks gray and cold and the sun has not shone today.
I would not very much care for the weather, disagreeable as it is, were
it not that Father is suffering a great deal with the rheumatism, he was
taken yesterday morning, and could not lie down at all last night, he was
in such pain; Thursday evening we went up on the mountain, all of us went
except John, we had a delightful time, and I went to bed thinking how much
I should enjoy a few more such rambles with Pa, but in the morning how sad
to find him suffering.
Miss Mary Vernon, a sister of Mrs. Loughmiller's, came here on Tuesday. Father thinks it was carrying George up the mountain and then sitting down in the cool air that brought on this attack, he did not carry George but a little way, but that was very steep.
Here is some poetry I found in an old collection of Mrs. Loughmiller's.—
I think the above lines are beautiful, they breathe such a sense of subdued sorrow, not passionate like Byron, but seeming just like what I should imagine Wordsworth to be.
Father is getting better, he has been free from pain for several days
but is very weak, Mother thinks he has had the broken bone fever and not
the
Miss Lizzie Keeney and Miss Mary Vernon went away yesterday, I was rather sorry to part with Miss Lizzie, she is a very pleasant young lady.
We expect to go away Monday, I am almost sorry to leave here we have
spent such a quiet, pleasant summer that I hate to go back to the noise
and bustle of the town, I hate to take up again the burden of working life,
after such a respite from care as I have had for the last two months, still
I wish to go to studying again for I feel more than ever before my great
ignorance in all that pertains to the knowledge of a student. I know nothing
of the sciences and no language except my own and a little of the latin, then
there are accomplishments, music, which is almost necessary and drawing and
painting, which I dearly love. Ah! I have much, very much to learn.
We are still having cold weather, we have had two heavy frosts, the side of the mountain looks beautiful now, bright red and yellow leaves are intermixed with the dark pines, and the lively green of some trees which have not yet begun to turn.
Mrs. Loughmiller, her sister, Mr. Henry and all of us went up the mountain
If Pa had been able to have gone our pleasure would have been without alloy.
We have arrived at Vicksburg once more, how long to remain I know not. We left Cohuttah last Monday, met Mrs. Horne's Family at Dalton, and came through to V. only stopping one night at Chattanooga.
From Chattanooga to Stevenson I was in a continual
After we left Stevenson we saw many beautiful groves and passed along some pretty places but we saw no more such scenery as that of which I first spoke.
All day some of the dust and
cinders get dinner, and then embarking on the freight train we came on to
Vicksburg where we arrived at dark. Here we were met by Mr. Green, who told
as the sad tidings that Mr. Horne was sick, confined to his bed. Poor Mrs.
Horne was greatly agitated. Father procured her a skiff and Mr. Green accompanied
her over to De Soto where she found Mr. Horne much better but not able
to go out, he has continued to improve but Saturday and Sunday he was thought
unable to live.
Miss Annie Lamar and the children came home with us, they have been here ever since for their house is being painted and they cannot sleep there.
Uncle Moses and his wife are here, at least in Vicksburg, they are boarding
at the Washington Hotel, they were here nearly a week before we came. I
went down to see Aunt Jane yesterday, Mother was too much fatigued to go, and
Willie has come on and has left for Louisiana, he has taken away one
of his mules which we had for the carriage and bought another so as to have
a team, he has gone to work. I felt so much disappointed when I heard that
he had gone, we miss him very much.
We found Uncle Dole's cards awaiting us when we arrived here, he send one to Mr. and Mrs. Wadley and Family and then another envelope for me, I was very much gratified. I think so much of such little things.
I cannot take lessons from Mr. Burr any longer, they say he is an abolitionist, at any rate, he has not come back, and his house is for sale, he sent a young man here to teach his school, but he did not get one scholar, and the people paid his expenses back to the North as he had no money; it is said that Mr. Burr took a negro girl on with him whom he had previously bought and taught to read.
There is a great excitement here concerning the coming election. God
grant that it may not be the cause of breaking up our glorious Union, but
still the Union is but a name, there is no concord, no real heart Union any
longer. The Abolitionists have sowed the seeds of dissension and insurrection
among us, those seeds are fast ripening and a blood harvest seems impending;
they have burnt our homesteads, killed our citizens, and incited our servants
to
Oh! may our countrymen see our wrongs ere it is too late, may they retrace
their course ere they plunge themselves into a gulf of ruin from which
they cannot escape. The North has more towns and villages, she has a greater
population, but some true hearts left.
I have been confined to my bed since Saturday, and am very weak now, I ought not to be writing, but I have just finished my solitary supper and feel so quiet up here that I cannot help writing a little bit.
Mr. Horne was to have come here yesterday but his wife persuaded him to remain quiet a week longer, his family are still here. Oh! 'tis impossible for me to attempt to write I must put down the pen and go to bed.
We are a little more settled than we were when I wrote here last. Mr.
Horne has come over & his family have gone to their house. Father has been to
Munroe once, returned, and gone again, he will bring Willie back with him
Sunday. Mother has decided that we are not to go to school this winter, I am
I wrote a letter to Miss Julia Rucker before leaving Cohuttah which I was so careless as to mislay so I must write again, I want to do it this evening but it is getting so dark that I do not think I can, how quickly the twilight comes now, winter is here, but I can scarcely believe it. I feel as if the winter is strange and often my mind reverts to last winter as a time long past, more a dream than reality.
This is election day but we have not been disturbed by noise in this part of the town, everything has been quiet thus far.
Tomorrow Father and Willie will come, how glad I shall be. I have been hard at work sweeping and dusting this morning and feel quite tired. I am so easily fatigued, perhaps if I took more exercise of this kind I might stronger.
I really do not know why I opened my journal this morning, for I having nothing to write, the great news of the day is that Lincoln is elected, and South Carolina is in a state of great excitement. I hope it will all end well.
We are having very pleasant weather, I am sitting with my windows open and I hear a bird singing from the mulberry trees outside.
Willie has come and gone, he and Father came over Monday morning, and we were all delighted to see them, especially Georgie, he came to the door and would not let Pa kiss him hardly, but said where is my brother Willie, when he saw Willie coming up the street with his high boots on, the saddlebags over his arm and his beard long, he would not believe that it was his “Brother Willie” but ran away from him; he soon became accustomed to him however, and was on his knee or in his arms almost all the time.
Monday was the twentieth anniversary of Father and Mother's marriage, and to celebrate it, they invited Mr. Horne's family, Aunt Jane and Dr. Young to dine with us. Uncle Moses was obliged to go over the river.
Willie looked in better health than when he left Cohuttah, but was rather thin, he is very much pleased with the country out there, likes it a great deal better than Vicksburg. Father has taken him into partnership with him the firm is “Wm Wadley & Son” contractors for grading the Vicksburg, Shreveport and Texas railroad.
Willie seemed more mild and affectionate than ever, I hated to see him go away.
Mr. and Mrs. Raoul from Independence came to visit us
I liked Mrs. Raoul very well, she reminded a great deal of Mrs. Garrett; Mr. Raoul appears much better with his wife than without her, before this visit I always felt uncomfortable in his presence, he seemed so nervous, but he was not so with his wife. They left yesterday.
Mother bought me a case of pencils the other day, I was so much pleased, they are just what I have wanted for three or four years.
Miss Mary and I commenced taking Music lessons from Mr. Nocepolius Monday, I like him better than Mr. Eaton he manifests more interest in his employment.
For the last two weeks I have written on Saturday and now I sit down again to record the events of the past week. Father came in to see us Sunday morning, and went after dinner, he has been gone all the week. We expected him today but as it is past twelve and he has not come we can only hope to see him.
The weather is so cold. Thursday it rained all day, yesterday was dark
and unpleasant, and today is bright and frosty, the mud in the streets was
all frozen up this morning, and all standing was turned to ice. Eva and I
have just returned from a ramble over fort hill, we went up by the regular
road but came down on the steepest side, we saw a little fall where the water
was all turned to icicles, by the time we arrived back home we were in a
perspiration.
Dr. Young was here yesterday afternoon, he had just returned from New
Orleans, and said that it was impossible to borrow money, he says that he
I received a letter from Aunt Satira a few days since, the tone of her letter is melancholy she says that this world will never be to her again what it has been. I know how I miss dear Aunt Lydia, I have never been very much with her but I knew her well enough to love her dearly and I have many little things to remind me constantly of her, how much worse must it be for Aunt Satira. Aunt Lydia was a true Christian but Aunt Satira has no religious belief. Much as I sorrow for her, I think my Aunt's death has done me good, I feel nearer to heaven since she has gone there and I have learned now to feel resigned at her loss. She was too tender in body and heart for this life, she must be happier now, for her poor motherless children I mourn, they never knew her worth.
Day before yesterday was my sixteenth birthday, it passed away quite as every other day does except that I took my music lesson as it was Monday.
Mother said she intended to have given me a birthday present but the times are so hard she could not afford it.
Mr. Horne has gone to Georgia to try and raise some money and Father left for New Orleans yesterday on the same errand I expect; Father expects to come back tomorrow night. I hope this pressure will not last long, Father does not think it will, but there are many others who do.
We have had no service in Church for two Sundays, Dr. Lord has been too sick to preach. Mr. Nocepelius says he has a bad cold, I hope he will recover before next Sabbath.
Mr. Green was here to dinner Sunday, he was as usual very pleasant, said
he really thought to go to church in the morning, but went down to the depot
and found things in such disorder there, that he had to stay and right them
supefluoustime.
Mother has engaged a white woman as a sort of head servant, she seems to be a very good woman, was born in Scotland and raised in Philadelphia. Mother has taken her on trial for a month, I think she will keep her.
It has been raining all the week, and will probably continue until the end, for it is too warm to clear off yet.
I have so much much news that I do not know what to write first, but as I must make a beginning I will commence with Father. He has just come but I have not had time to learn how he came, the rains last week damaged the New Orleans and Jackson road so much and Father was so long a time getting over the breaks that he could not come home Thursday as he expected. We heard dreadful accounts of the road it was said that there were fourteen breaks in it and that Father could not get home unless he went round by the river, but he has come, and by the railroad too. He says the New Orleans road is worse broken in pocket than the track.
And now I have bad news to write, Willie has very narrowly escaped being
killed, he was out in the woods having same trees cut down when one fell, and
hitting him on the side of his head, grazed his shoulder and knocked him down.
Had it struck him a half an inch further on his head he would have died. Oh!
how thankful I feel to the power that preserved him to us; he is now quite
well, so Mr. Green (the engineer on the other side) says.
The Southern road has not come out unhurt from the rains, one of the bridges is washed away.
Dr. Lord has recovered from his illness, sufficiently to preach. We had service yesterday but Dr. Lord looked quite unwell.
We had a rain again last night, but the sky is clear again, though it is very muddy.
Mr. Nocepelius has not given us a lesson for a week, I think he must be sick for he was in Church yesterday; he is the organist.
I wrote so soon after Father's return yesterday (indeed I commenced writing before it) that I had not learned any of his news; he had to walk six miles Sunday and rode some distance on an engine, and worse than all he fell into a river at one time and sat in the sun until his pants were half dry. I am afraid that not even his iron constitution can bear such exposure without injury.
Father says that since his visit to New Orleans he is convinced that we must secede, it is impossible for the North and South to coalesce.
Dr. Palmer, pastor of the first Presbyterian Church in New Orleans,
delivered an excellent sermon on thanksgiving day. Father brought the paper
containing it up to us, he (Dr. P.) says that he has never before intruded
his opinions upon political subjects, but that for some months he has right, that the slave being by
nature incapable of self government is dependent upon his master for protection
and that it is the duty of the master to extend that protection to
him, his forcible and eloquent words are these
“He leans upon me for protection for counsel and for blessing; and so long as the relation continues no power but the power of Almighty God shall come between him and me. Were there no argument but this, it binds upon us the providential duty of preserving the relation that we may save him from a doom worse than death” again “Strike now a blow at this system of labor and the world itself totters at the stroke, shall we permit the blow to fall? do we not owe it to civilized man to stand in the breach and stay the uplifted arm?” again “This trust we will discharge in the face of the worst possible peril. Though war be the aggregation of all evils, yet should the madness of the hour appeal to the arbitration of the sword, we will not shrink from the baptism of fire. If modern crusaders stand in serried ranks upon some plain of Esdraelon, there shall we be in defence of our trust.
Not till the last man has fallen behind the last rampart, shall it drop from our hands; and then only in surrender to God who gave it” and in conclusion the position of the South is at this moment sublime. If she has grace given her to know her hour she will save herself, her country and the world. It will involve indeed temporary prostration and distress; the dykes of Holland must be out to save her from the troops of Phillip. But I warn my countrymen, the historic moment, once passed, never returns. If she will arise in her majesty and speak now as with the voice of one man, she will roll back for all time the curse that is upon her. If she succumbs now, she transmits that curse as an heirloom to posterity”.
These are only Dr. Palmer's conclusions that I have quoted, he supports them by sound and christian reasoning, the whole sermon is forcible, temperate and sensible, there is no attempt to stimulate the imagination, but to convince the reason and strengthen the courage of his hearers.
Dr. Palmer is a talented minister, well known throughout these states,
and his sermon, which Father thinks will be issued in
Oh! if the South would only unite and not disgrace herself in this hour of common peril by internal bickerings.
The week has passed very quietly indeed to me, my mornings have been spent in alternate hours of practising and painting and the evenings in reading “Lardner on the steam engine, and having Father explain what I did not understand. It is so pleasant to have Father at home, he has not been home a whole week before since we returned from Cohuttah.
We are to move over the river as soon as we can, probably in about three weeks, Miss Mary and I are going down to Amite, during the moving time, to see Miss Valeria Ridgill & her sisters, and Mrs. Raoul, Mr. Raoul was here to dinner yesterday, he went away on the evening train but would have remained another day if we could have gone home with him.
Mr. Nocepelius has been on a “spree” the reason why he did not give us our music lessons. He came Thursday and excused himself by saying that he had sprain his ankle and could not walk, poor man! I feel very sorry for him, he is an educated man, is a perfect gentleman when sober, but he is too weak to resist the love of liquor, he was pale and haggard Thursday and his ankle was so lame that he walked with difficulty.
The first part of the week was very cold indeed, but yesterday the weather moderated very much and this morning it was like spring. I have taken two very long walks this week, and a few short ones, exercise benefits me, I feel very well indeed.
We all went to Church yesterday and heard a fine sermon from Dr. Lord,
Father was very such pleased with it, he spoke of the mistaken piety of
Mr. Green was here last night, and in speaking of the sermon I remarked
that I did not think the sermon applied, or was intended to apply, to the
abolitionists alone, but to every one who thought they possessed in their
consciences a surer guide to virtue and a greater
Mr. Horne returned yesterday, we met him as we came from Church, he succeeded in getting a little money and is promised some more, he says the times are not near as bad in Georgia as they are here.
But I must really stop writing I have to strain my eyes to see the letters, Mr. Nocepelius gave us a lesson, Miss Annie and Lamar were in the room at the time and he was so embarrassed he could scarcely give the lesson.
I have been busy packing all day and am not yet more than half through my part, I spent the morning in packing my own dear keepsakes and a few books that I must carry with me, these had to be so carefully stowed away that they filled one trunk and kept me busy packing them until dinner time.
It makes me melancholy to look over these things, they recall so many past scenes some pleasant, some painful.
After dinner, with Miss Allen's help I packed four boxes of books just
as tight as possible, which Uncle Jim is now screwing up, these are to be
Eva and Lory are delighted at the prospect of going over where Willie is, but while I was packing the books I could not but think of the first time those boxes were packed how delighted I was when they came up from the depot and how important I felt because I was chosen to help Pa and Willie pack. I remember now how I sat perched up on a pile of boxes, pencil and book in hand taking a list of books, my journal for that time says that like all children I was pleased with novelty.
Father went over the river Tuesday, we expect him and Willie back Sunday; I have been so busy this week finishing up my correspondence for this year practising, sewing and visiting, that the time has seemed short to me, Oh! there is the supper bell I must go.—
Mr. Gnocepelius (that is the way he spells his name I believe) gave a lesson Thursday he says he will come over to Monroe once a week and give his lessons as soon as the road is completed.
I am very tired, and as I have a good
The weather yesterday and today has been very cloudy and unpleasant, it rained a little last night but I do not think it will rain more for it grows colder as the evening advances.
Father arrived very unexpectedly yesterday morning, and Willie came
today. Willie is going down to Amite with us, I am so glad I was afraid
we should have to go alone, it is settled that we are to Tuesday.
Mr. Green was here this morning, I saw him only for a moment, he
came to ask Father's advice about his business, some of the directors of
Mother said he seemed very much hurt by it, he went down to New
Orleans this evening, said he would wait till tomorrow if we could go
then, but Father told Willie could go with us
We are still here.
I felt yesterday so thankful that we had been kept from going, I
thought I thought I would never again repine at a
I do not know now whether we shall go down to Amite at all, Mother
I was perfectly surprised, nay astonished, amazed at this paragraph, how was it possible
that anyone, even the dullest of men could consider my coldness my repeated
repulses and avoidances as manifestations of exalted friendship, and
then he went on to say that it was amusing to see the military aspect
Columbia had assumed, and the excitement there prevailing—, amusing
indeed, a man of feeling and patriotism could not speak thus, a man of
sense would be ashamed to treat so grave a subject with such silly levity,
he must either be deficient in brains himself or must have a very poor
opinion of me to think to interest me with such nonsense; but really I
have become quite excited, more indignant than such a thing deserves, but
I must be pardoned, my excuse is that I am very inexperienced; a few years
from this time, I will wonder that such a thing could ever have moved me,
even as I now wonder at the outbreakings of angered vanity which I remember
in my early childhood.
Father has not returned yet, I do not think he
Georgie's throat is almost well, he has been out today; John was very sick last night, but is much better today.
It is Christmas day, the great festival of the year, but this Christmas is not very merry to us, nor, I dare say, to many others in This country.
Dr. Lord said last Sunday that we ought to let the great wave of political troubles roll by for a while, and try and forget the exigencies of the times during Christmas, the anniversary of that day in which rose the sun of Righteousness; but this is very hard to do. We can have no tangible expressions of merry making, which though far less dignified than a deep Christian rejoicing goes very far towards promoting universal thankfulness and love in the household.
I wrote to Eddie Josselyn a few weeks ago and was very much gratified last Sunday to receive a reply, what was my surprise after reading nearly through the letter to see this sentence “Father has married our housekeeper, Emma H. Richardson”. I could not believe it and handed the letter to Mother that her reading might testify to the correctness of mine, poor children! I hope for them and pray that my hopes may be realized.
Mr. Green was here as usual Sunday night, he and father conversed
principally upon the state of the New Orleans and Jackson Railroad, it
Uncle Moses and Aunt Jane are coming to dine with us today. Father asked Mr. Green, but he had to go out on the road, I believe. Miss Mary and I expect now to leave here tomorrow on our way to Amite. Father thinks he will go with us, the free ticket is found, but Father says if it had not been he would rather pay our passages twice over than to have us not go, he does not wish to move us all at one time, Mother expects to leave here the last of this month or the first of next, it is a little undecided yet. Father and Willie have been very busy packing yesterday and this morning, there is not a great deal to do now.
This is the first good opportunity I have had to write in my journal since we arrived here.
We spent Christmas day very quietly, our only extra amusement was going to the Christmas tree at the Church. Eva was one of the Sabbath school scholars and Willie, Miss Mary and I went with her. Lamar Horne came round and we went together. Early the next morning rose, and after a good deal of bustle and confusion we told them all goodbye and bade a farewell also to our home in Vicksburg.
Father came with us, it was so pleasant to have him. At Jackson we
met Mr. Green, it was a very unexpected meeting to me, I did not see him
until he held out his hand to me. I fancied afterwards, it might have been
All along on the New Orleans and Jackson railroad I felt so melancholy,
I always do when I am on that road. I remember so many
After knocking twice one of the servants came to the door and recognising
us screamed out, “Miss Mary and Miss Sarah I declare”, upon this Gussie
peeped out of a door and I created a
We have spent our time so pleasantly, the days fly before we know it.
We sent down to see Mrs. Stewart's Thursday morning, and passed the morning very pleasantly giving and receiving information about each other's family and friends.
Yesterday evening we went to see Mrs. Duncan, it rained while we were there, and John had to put boards in the carriage for us to put our feet on coming home; Mrs. Duncan welcomed us very warmly.
All this morning has been occupied by visitors, Judge Huling and a Dr Richardson came over to see us, and Dr. Richardson staid all the morning, old Judge Huling went down to the depot for the mail, and told him to stay till he came back, so that no choice was left to the Doctor; he was quite agreeable.
Mother told us when we came away that we must practise an hour a day, we have not done it yet, and it seems as if we shall not be able to do it. Miss Mary seems to be enjoying herself very much, she and Gussie keep us laughing (that is Miss Maria and I) nearly all the time, and then they scold us for giggling so much.
The last day of the old year! What sad thoughts arise within us as we think over the changes of the past twelve months, some have been taken away some have been added to us in that time.
How mournfully I think over the fruitless efforts the dead hopes that
have passed over me; the unexecuted plans and resolves of last New Years
rise up in accusation against me, a long train of accusers; and who can
tell what another year may bring forth, in the midst of political excitement,
of family confusion it befits me to trust all to God, and only to
strive for a greater spirit of love and faith for him, so that I can apply
to myself the promise “All things work together for good to them that
love God”.—And truly we have much to be thankful for, God in his
mercy has seen fit to take from us one whom we all love, but we have the
consolation of believing that he has taken her to himself, and that he
will not forget the
I received a letter from Mother today, it is dated the 29th. She says
Yesterday morning when we first rose it was raining hard and towards noon it commenced sleeting and continued till night. Oh! it was so cold this morning.
Judge Huling and Dr. Richardson spent the evening here, the Judge came over in the morning and said that the Dr. was sick, he had a “beating in the breast” and the Judge wanted to bring him over so that Miss Valeria might prescribe for him.
The new year has come in peaceably enough with us, but with confusion and terror in some parts of our country, the papers say that the ship Harriet Lane has been sent to Charleston, and been denied admittance into the Harbour, it is said that Charleston is full of Soldiers and that the ladies are all busy preparing lint and bandages.
The years 1860 and 1861 will long be remembered, not only in this, but in other countries.
Monday evening we went down to see Mr. Waters, he is at home alone, Miss Lizzie is in the city, he seemed very much gratified that we had come to see him.
New Years day and the day after we spent quietly at home, at least
at home, not very quietly it is true, for we have been preparing for some
Tableaux, which we are to have tonight. We have enjoyed contriving the
dresses very much and we think that the Tableaux will be very pretty,
they are entirely among ourselves, no one is invited except Miss Sallie,
We had our tableaux last night, nearly all the scenes were very pretty, and would have been beautiful if we had had a stronger light upon them. Miss Mary, Gussie, Charlie and Emma were the actors, Miss Valeria and I the dressing maids, and Miss Sallie and Octavia Huling, Master Octave Byzantzine, their cousin, and Mr. Richardson (a brother of the Dr.) the spectators, besides the family. John and Angus criticized the scenes very freely; in one Gussie was dressed in an antique manner, standing alone, in a graceful, pensive attitude, the picture was really very pretty indeed; as the curtain drew up Miss Valeria said that is Louisa (the name of the picture) ‘indeed’ said Angus ‘that is Gussie” “Yes,” remarked John, “and Gussie has on false hair too” at this Miss Sallie Huling laughed loudly. I expected every moment to see Gussie smile, and was provoked with John and Angus for talking to, but she did not move a muscle until the curtain dropped and then poor Gussie! she ran into the room and gave way to her anger. Gussie is very impulsive, and they were really quite provoking to speak so when she looked so pretty, but boys will be boys, one can not change their thoughtless natures.
Miss Mary was alone in the last scene, she looked really beautiful,
she will make a belle when she is grown, she is tall and (unconsciously)
a little haughty in her expression, her complexion is very fair and sometimes
enlivened by a peachlike bloom, her mouth is small and she has very
full red lips, her eyes hazel with a kind of very pretty, and if she
would only cultivate her mind she might be beautiful, as it is her greatest
very practical, has not much taste for reading of
any kind, and cannot bear poetry; but really I had forgotten all about
the tableaux, I
John, on the contrary, has devoted himself to one particular Goddess, but at the supper table tonight he made the very uncommon remark for disconsolate young men, that very few women are constant, that perhaps his fair lady has jilted him. Both the boys are very agreeable indeed, but I believe that I like Angus (the youngest) best, he is quicker than John, very frank, and exceedingly agreeable and quite witty in conversation.
John is very nice in his dress, always keeps his hair smooth and glossy, corrects the children if they do not speak grammatically, and makes a good many puns, he is very kind to drive us wherever we wish to go, and makes no objection to any of our arrangements, he is seventeen.
Oh, dear! what writing, but I have a good excuse. I wish I were an artist to portray the scene in this room a little while ago.
Miss Valeria, Miss Mary Gussie and I were all sitting round the fireplace
in which is blazing a pine fire, Miss Valeria sitting in a rocking
chair with her feet on the side of the mantel (not a graceful position, but
nevertheless very comfortable) was writing her journal, I sitting down on
the rug engaged in the same occupation and as my ink is pale and I write
by firelight the characters are of course not very distinct. Gussie and
Miss Mary were on the other side of the fire, Miss Mary sitting (in a
Miss Mary and Gussie have gone to bed now, but they did not go until they had made us laugh about fifteen minutes by their droll sayings.
Old Judge Huling was over here this evening, he asked me what sort of a man I wanted to marry, I was perfectly surprised and a little annoyed by the question, answered him politely but very vaguely, he then turned to Miss Mary and obtained more satisfaction from her; she expressed her likes and dislikes pretty plainly; the Judge told me I had a very good nose, a large nose and heavy eyebrows he says are sure signs of a fine mind. He has told me that twice, I expect he wants to console me for my ugliness, he said also that I was just about the right size. I wonder if he knows how I dislike my short stature.
Today was appointed as a day of fasting and prayer by the President, we all went to Church this morning and have not indulged in any great excitement either of mind or body but yet we have not kept a strict fast.
I must really stop I have sat doubled up so long that I feel all lame.
The week is now ended, and we are here still, I could stay two or three weeks longer and not be tired, I feel perfectly at home here, for I know that we are welcome guests. Father may come any night and I suppose he will wish to go on immediately, so that we hold ourselves in readiness to leave any time.
Today has been beautiful, the sun has shone out bright and clear all
day. This evening we went down the Hotel to see Mrs. Grice and had a
pleasant visit, on our way back we stopped to see Mrs. Stewart and
Amite has increased in size since we left here, it is quite a little town, the Church is a very neat little edifice, has been plastered since we left, and the ladies are endeavoring to get a carpet, melodian and bell, they expect to obtain these soon.
Mrs. Grice told us that Mr. Williams had an elegant service of silver presented to him New Years eve by the employees of the road, it is said that he was so much surprised by the present that he could not make a speech in thanks, the service is said to have cost eleven hundred dollars. I was glad to hear that he was popular enough to receive such a present, but was astonished when I heard of it.
Mr. Ridgill returned home tonight, he has a very bad cold; he says that no mails have been received in the city for several days, and that all the news comes by telegraph, as the despatches are often contradictory they are not considered very reliable; it has been telegraphed and is considered true that a fort in Georgia near Savannah and one near Mobile Alabama have been taken by the troops of the respective states, various rumours are floating about regarding Charleston, the city (Charleston) is full of soldiers, troops from Georgia have tendered their services and been accepted. The confidence of the South Carolinians is unabated, my my sympathies are with them.
Father came yesterday morning as we were at breakfast; he had been over the river twice since he left here, but Mother is still in Vicksburg at Mr. Horne's.
Father had been walking so much and had been through so much fatigue
that he was very stiff and lame, and looked Oh! so tired his eyes seemed
Father commenced reading the paper but soon fell asleep and slept for about an hour, when he woke up he consented to lie down and take a nap. This so refreshed him that after washing and shaving he looked like a different man; he left on the train Sunday night for New Orleans.
Miss Valeria, Miss Mary, Gussie, John, Angus and myself walked down with him as far as the Church, where we stopped, and heard part of a very good though not very polished Methodist sermon. We had a very pleasant walk, back, our conversation might perhaps have been too merry for the Sabbath but I think our mirth was harmless, it was only the natural manifestation of youth and high spirits; Angus walked in such a funny manner with his hands in his pockets and his overcoat hanging over his shoulders, and talked so goodnaturedly about his being affected by Dr. Richardson's malady, a beating of the breast and therefore unable to walk straight, that we could not help laughing at this all the way. John, too contributed his share to our amusement by making some laughable criticisms on Angus and Gussie.
After we came upstairs I read aloud to Miss Valeria, a very interesting sermon delivered by the Rev. Mr. Vandyke in the first Presbyterian Church, Brooklyn, New York, upon the subject of slavery. It was a very able discourse treating abolitionism on scriptural ground and only touching lightly upon Political subjects.
We expect to leave here Wednesday for Independence. Father intends to
come up the road tomorrow morning and move Mother over the river Wednesday,
that is, if it does not rain, we shall see him as he goes up. Mr. Ridgill
It is eleven o'clock now and my feeling admonish me that it is time to retire. Tonight after John and Angus returned from the depot we all sat up a long time talking and laughing about our summer at Cohuttah. Miss Mary gave some very graphic accounts of our life there, and delivered them in such a peculiarly funny manner that she made us all laugh a great deal.
Just a week since I last wrote here. We went down to Independence Wednesday as we expected, John Ridgill put us on the cars, and in a few minutes the train stopped at Independence. Mr. Raoul was waiting for us, and with his assistance I was able to step from the car to the platform though I was so nervous I scarcely could stand. His little son Giffen drove us to the house, where we were met with great cordiality by Mrs. Raoul who introduced us to her daughter Florence, thirteen years old, and Mr. Raoul's daughter Rosine, fifteen.
After removing our bonnets and cloaks Mrs. Raoul conducted us to the parlor and made us acquainted with her Mother, Mrs. Stanton, a remarkable old lady, so cheerful and intelligent in conversation, so kind and attentive to the wants of the whole family. Mr. Raoul says she is the youngest one in the house. They are altogether a remarkable family, they have three sets of children, Mr. Raoul's, Mrs. Raoul's and their mutual offspring, and they live together in perfect amity. Mrs. Raoul's children call Mrs. Stanton Grandma, and are as fond of her as her own. Grandchildren. Our visit was very pleasant indeed.
One evening we walked over to Mr. Raoul's mill and saw them sawing
and planing plank and making cars, on our way back the sun was setting
on the high green pines it made them perfectly beautiful. I felt as if I
We left Independence Saturday morning after many invitations to return,
and pay them another visit, they very pressingly invited us to remain
longer but I told them that Father expected me to come up Saturday
and I could not remain. I was very glad that I came when I heard that
Father had told Mr. Terry we were coming Saturday, how could I ever
At Amite John came in to see us and brought a book and some clothing that we had left at Mrs. Ridgill's; Miss Valeria did not come in the cars but she with Mrs. Stewart, Emma and Charley stood at Mrs. Stewart's door and waved us a final adieu.
The conductor was so kind as to give me a delta to read and between
reading, sleeping, and looking around at the varied characters in the car
the day passed quickly away. I began to feel rather nervous as we approached
Terry and I thought that perhaps the Captain might not be at the depot, but
my apprehensions were set at rest by the sight of his handsome face and
his warm welcome; Miss Ellen Eagan, a cousin of Mrs. Terry's came with us
from Crystal Springs. I was introduced to her by Captain Terry at the depot
and we all rode to the house together. We found Jane Terry, the Captain's
eldest daughter, at home so that I have at last the pleasure of being acquainted
with the “curly head” whom I have so often heard extolled by
Father and Willie, she is a very pleasant, quite an
I received a letter from Aunt Jane Saturday evening, she says that
We are enjoying ourselves very well, I believe Miss Mary is very well contented though she did not wish to come up here.
Yesterday and today the weather has been cloudy and unpleasant, it
is not cold at all. This afternoon a relative of Capt. Terry's, Mr. James
Moore came to see us.
I expected to have been at “home” (strange word) by this time, but Father was unable to care for us Wednesday and wrote to Captain Terry that he must keep us two or three days longer, I do not know now when to expect him but should not be surprised to see him any day.
We had a little dance here Tuesday night, I enjoyed myself very much
indeed. I dreaded it for some time but when I am obliged to go into company
I enjoy myself as such as anybody. We only had four gentlemen and
one girl, a cousin of Jane's, little Willie Terry danced almost every set,
he was so anxious to dance that he could not sit down at all, for myself
I danced every set except four out of ten, I believe. I was not sorry when
the time came for the gentlemen to retire although they were all very pleasant
and three of them I liked very well.
I have taken up a new accomplishment lately, that of knitting stockings,
Jane, Miss Mary, Miss Ellen Eagan and I, spent the day out yesterday. We started off at about ten o'clock, Jane and Miss Mary in the buggy and Miss Ellen and I on horseback. My horse was a very gentle, pretty little grey pony, but he had not had a lady on his back for so long that it required a good deal of coaxing to get him to let me mount him, and it is so long since I rode a horse that I felt afraid of him nearly all the time.
At first we rode up to Mrs. Mim's, about a mile and a half or two
miles from here and spent about half an hour and then came back to Mrs.
Burnett's, where we spent the reminder of the day. Here I had the pleasure
of meeting Captain Terry's Father, a fine, young looking old gentleman,
but in my opinion not so handsome as Captain Terry who resembles very
much the portraits of the first great Napoleon.
We left Miss Ellen at Mrs. Burnett's to spend the night, little Bobbie Terry went for her this morning but she has not yet returned. It rained quite hard last night, but the sun rose clear and bright this morning.
Octave Byzantzine stayed here last night, he came up to meet a
young engineer who had appointed this as a for him.
As I have not written any here since we left Terry, not indeed
since several days before our
We had another little dance on Saturday night at the Captain's, it was rather a storm party, the Captain knew nothing about it until evening, the young gentlemen liked the first dance so much that they made up a party among themselves and sent word to Jane, through Mr. Moore, that they were coming up in the evening. It was the same number, and the same party that were there before, with the exception of one young man, we enjoyed ourselves very much, but as it was Saturday night we retired early.
Monday we heard that Pa was coming for us Wednesday, so we prepared to leave then.
Tuesday night the young men sent us word by the school children
that they were coming up to serenade us. We all went to work and prepared
hearts of Arbourvitae sawed on cards to throw out to them, as we
had no flowers, and went to bed with the pleasing expectation of being
waked up about midnight by sweet music 'neath our windows, but midnight
passed without any music, and in the morning we had to console (?) us
the humiliating reflection that we had prepared for a serenade and been
I forgot to state in its order that Miss Ellen Eagan left us Sunday
Wednesday morning I packed our trunk put on my travelling dress,
and waited for Father to come, at last the whistle blew, and soon after,
we were called out to the piazza by the cry the buggy the buggy is
coming, for some time we could not tell whether any one had come or not,
but after a while it was certain that some gentleman was there, but
the tall beaver hat certainly could not be Father's, no, it was not. I
was afraid must have looked
forced. I managed to enquire after to Father and the Hornes very well
untill I learned that we were to remain nearly a week at their house, a
week at Mr. Hornes! a week in Springfield! how could I bear it.
My trunk would have to be unpacked, my washing would have to be given
out, what vexations would I not have to endure, I could hardly keep my
countenance straight. As soon as I could, I left the room, and gave way
to my feelings in a good cry, after this I felt somewhat relieved, but
still very sad, very much depressed and withal very much perplexed, for
Captain Terry had asked me to stay and go to a little party at Mrs.
Burnett's that night, he said he would take me to Jackson the next morning,
and we could go on to Vicksburg alone. I did not know what to do,
Miss Mary wanted to stay and so did I but then I thought, “Mr. Horne
has come down here for us by Father's request, would he not be displeased
if we did not go back with him, would not Father dislike it”,
I debated for some time in my own mind and at last decided to go, after
this I felt better for I felt that, however disagreeable it was, I was
doing right. Jane and Carrie went down to the depot to see us off; I
asked Jane to come up to Vicksburg and come home with us, she said she
We bade all goodbye, and left Terry looking very lonely and desolate through the drizzling rain. Mr. League (one of the party at our two dances) went with us the first ten miles, I was glad when he left the car, for though very pleasant he is one of those people towards whom I have an aversion.
We arrived at Vicksburg rather late and drove through the drizzling
rain to the suburb called Springfield where Mr. Horne resides. Mrs.
Horne and Lelia were sitting up for us, Miss Annie and Lamar in consequence
of unusual fatigue the night before, had retired. After supper
we glad to go to our room and to bed, Mrs. Horne gave me two letters,
but I looked at the direction and knowing by that, that they were from
Aunts Mary and Satira, I was
Thursday I spent the morning in writing to Mother and Aunt Mary and lounging about the sitting room. I felt too weary to write in my journal. In the afternoon Miss Mary, Lamar and myself went down town to see Aunt Jane and to make some necessary purchases; Aunt Jane welcomed us warmly and pressed me to spend the night with her as Uncle Moses was on his work. I very willingly accepted her invitation and remained.
Friday Miss Mary and Lamar came down and we all dined at the hotel,
in the afternoon we went up to prayers at the Church. Lelia and Howell
Horne were baptized. After prayers we went to walk up on Fort hill, and
did not get back until dark. While we were on the hill, a few flakes of
snow fell and after dark it snowed so as to cover the ground. Just as I
I will tell you the rest when I see you” finally she told
Mr. Green that her nieces would probably be down to see her the next
morning, he said, as of course he must, that he would call and see them.
She asked us to come down and see her in the morning.
Saturday morning Miss Mary and I went down to the hotel, the sun
shone very brightly, the air was clear and cold, and the snow on the
ground was so little that we had no difficulty in walking. The rest
that Aunt Jane had to tell me, was that Mr. Green said he had never
been invited to Mr. Horne's and therefore did not wish to go there.
We had been at the hotel about an hour, when Mr. Horne called to
tell me that the railroad was finished
Sunday morning after breakfast Father came, and soon we had bade them goodbye and were riding down to the ferry with him.
We came on the first train that ever ran through to Munroe, it was not the regular passenger train, but had some few of persons on board who were allowed to go as a favor. Mr. Horne came through, and when we arrived within twenty miles of Monroe, some gentlemen came on board who had come out to meet the train, they were John Rae and Mr. Bry, the latter is the owner of this place. I was introduced to them both. When we came to Munroe, we were met with cheers from the large crowd who had collected on each side of the track, they were composed of all classes, young and old, male and female, black and white, many of whom had never seen a locomotive before. Our engine was decorated with red, blue and white, streamers (although Louisiana no longer acknowledges the authority of the stars and stripes).
Father had brought our carriage along, and Willie met us at Munroe with a couple of mules so that we could come right on, our house is six miles west of Munroe.
We did not arrive here till nearly eight o'clock, the roads are so bad now that we had to come very slowly. When we arrived here George and John were asleep, but the rest of the family were waiting for us.
After a hearty supper which was very welcome, to us for I had not eaten anything but one biscuit since breakfast, we retired to bed and were soon wrapped in sound refreshing slumber.
The next day, Monday, I spent in looking about at our new residence and in walking down to Willie's camp, which is a mile from here.
Tuesday I went to work to clean out our room the floor of which was covered with Mr. Bry's library and papers, also divers broken chairs and desks, selfsealing cans, bottles, demijohns, and a great many seeds.
I had all these last mentioned articles carried out and then set myself seriously to a task, namely, classifying the books and arranging them upon shelves, for Mr. Bry told me that I might have the use of his library if I was willing to take care of it; the books were covered with long accumulated dust and were in the greatest confusion imaginable I worked until the sun went down and it was so dark I could not see, and then was reluctant to stop although I was very tired.
Mr. John Green the engineer on the railroad came to supper and spent the night here, I did not go out to supper, but saw him the next morning at breakfast.
Wednesday I went again to my room and by working hard finished arranging the books, and had my room scoured. Thursday I directed a servant about scouring a desk and the shelves and some other things, Thursday night Father came home.
Friday I did not do much of anything the weather was cloudy, cold and consequently disagreeable, and as my room has no glasses in it, but only think wooden shutters it is not very pleasant in very cold or rainy weather. Towards night a few large flakes of snow fell but it turned off into a slow freezing rain almost like sleet. Father was coming home on horseback from Munroe, and as he had no overcoat or blanket but only a thin robber coat over him, he was nearly frozen, he said never recollected having such a cold ride; some negroe men were coming along in carts with our furniture, and they suffered greatly, our trunk did not get here till Friday.
In the night we had a dreadful rain and it was unpleasant all day
Saturday. Sunday we spent very quietly at home, Willie came to breakfast
and spent the day with us. The weather was very pleasant, bright
and clear but quite cold; we went out to walk and had a delightful
Monday and yesterday I passed in unpacking my trunk, arranging my
papers and writing materials in an old writing desk I found here (mine
is not coming at present) and sewing.
Yesterday (Tuesday) evening Mother and I went to see some neighbors of ours named Adams who live about a quarter of a mile from here by the road, their house is in sight across the fields, they are very pleasant, plain people, old Mr. Adams and his wife are quite aged, they have a married son and a married daughter living near them, also an unmarried son.
Father has been away from home since Monday morning, an express came for him Sunday night saying that two of the bridges were broken and asking him to come and have them mended; the regular trains are not running Monroe yet, Father is having a turn table made at Monroe.
There is to be a meeting of the stockholders of this road on the
15th of this month, Uncle David and Uncle Dole will be here in all probability
and may bring their wives, I hope they will. I am now very tired
I do not know how I could write so long as I have, but I have been feeling ever since my trunk came that I ought to write up my journal, and now that it is done I feel very much relieved in mind.—
The time has passed very quietly since I wrote here last, but the days have been so fully and pleasantly occupied that I have not been lonely, nor has the time seemed long to me.
We have moved into our room, and now as I look around upon it, the rough white-washed walls and neat but simple furniture, lighted up by the cheerful light of a wood fire, it looks very comfortable indeed.
Father came in the other morning after I had arranged my things, and said “ah, you have made your little room look very cheerful and cozy”, and Mother said I had arranged it very neatly indeed, sweet praise, more delightful to me than any other.
Saturday night Father had the piano brought and put it up, it is very pleasant to have it. I did not know how much company it was until I was without it. I recommenced giving Eva lessons yesterday, she improves very well, I feel happy to think that I am able to contribute to her improvement. I persuaded Miss Mary to begin a journal today, she is sadly deficient in both composition and spelling, and I know by experience that daily journal writing is a great help to learning both.
Father left us yesterday to go to Vicksburg, he expects to return
Yesterday evening Mother, Lory, George, Rose with the baby, and myself all took a ride in the cart up to Mrs. Young's, the doctor's wife. We had a very funny time riding there, and back, the mule is one which is so lazy that Willie could not work it, and he gave it to Uncle Jim to haul wood with. Uncle Jim had to beat it almost every step, and between the jolts caused by the roughness of the road and Uncle Jim's funny remarks we had a very merry time.
I wish we had this house for a longer time, it is so pleasant out here, but Mr. Bry says we cannot have it longer than June, I dare say it is all for the best however, though we cannot see it now.
But I must close my book and retire, for it is rather late and Miss Mary has asked me several times if I were not almost done.—
Father came, as he had expected Wednesday night, but had to return to Vicksburg early the next morning, so as to present at the meeting, which commenced yesterday. Father is to write us word whether any one of our relatives have come from Georgia to attend it. Father brought us some newspapers from which we learned that Jeff. Davis of Mississippi and Alexander Stephens of Georgia have been elected President and vice president of the Southern confederacy, formed of all the seceding states. I had almost written the United States, how sad to think that we are united no longer, that we are no more natives of one common country, necessary as is the separation how can we think of it without grief. I am glad that there has been a good choice of rulers made, both the president and vice president are said to be wise, upright and moderate men, all southerners know of their eloquence and experience in public life.
Thursday we were all a great deal surprised to receive a visitor
who had passed out of my mind, at least, so perfectly that I regarded
somewhat in the light of a stranger dropped from the clouds, though
this was owing more to the suddenness of his appearance than to any
thing
Mr. Barron also spoke of some others whom we used to know slightly when we were in Amite.
I have quite a number of items for today's journal, although I have put off writing so long that I have not a great deal of time to devote to it. Between sewing (of which I do not do a great quantity) practising, reading, and painting, my days fly away very fast indeed, and after all I fear that I waste some time, the very fear of not improving it all makes me waste some little scraps.
Father returned on Monday, neither of my Uncles from Georgia came
with him, but in their stead he brought Uncle Moses and the two Mr. Grants
members of “Fannin, Grant & Co.” the last two from Georgia, the conversation
was principally upon railroad matters. Father has not yet determined
They all left early in the morning, and Georgie and I went as far as Munroe with them, we had a very pleasant ride, I was interested during the ride thither by the conversation, which was principally upon grading, not a very interesting topic one would think, but I was pleased to observe how geology and and the science of mathematics were made to blend together, and to serve a most practical and useful end.
Father went to the Boeuf river to attend to the repairing of a bridge, last night he came home lame and walking with a crutch. He fell from the bridge, by the carelessness of one of his assistants, and very narrowly escaped an instant and terrible death, as it was, he caught upon a timber and escaped with a severe sprain in his heel. This is another signal mercy from our Father in Heaven. Father left again this morning to meet the first regular passenger train from Vicksburg to Munroe.
I must go now and read some, I am reading the Waverly novels aloud, I have only read Ivanhoe, and an going to commence Rob Roy today.
Mother and Loring went to Monroe today to bring Father home in the
carriage, as it hurts his foot to ride on horseback. When the carriage
drove up I was transfixed with astonishment, for there, reclining upon
the cushions, pale and languid as it is possible for him to look I saw
Uncle Dole, after having given up all hope of seeing them this winter.
It was indeed a joyful surprise, Uncle Moses was with him, but he had
left Aunt Lizzie in Georgia. I was very much
Uncle Dole has not been well for the last few days, and looks badly,
Father did not come home, he remained in Monroe with the members of “Fannin, Grant & Company” who have adjourned to that place. I am afraid that Father is having much trouble with the many unreasonable members. Uncle Dole says that Uncle David and his family yet think of coming out, but I am afraid they will not come, Uncle Dole says the times are very hard in Georgia, and maybe they do not feel able to come out.
Father came home Friday night, very unexpectedly to us all, he did arrive until after we had retired. Fannin, Grant & Co. have sold out to the railroad company who take possession at the road next month. Mr. Horne's office as superintendent has of course expired, with the firm by which he was employed, that office will probably be tendered to Father and it is not likely that he will refuse it, the new era which I prophesied is drawing very near, we will enter upon it at the time when our country enters upon hers, when the infant confederacy follows out self sustained, the destiny which she entered in common with her sister states.
Sunday we spent very quietly at home, hearing for a great part of the day Father's proposals as to our future, and his conversation with Uncles Moses and Dole upon business affairs. Father's foot is a great deal better he can now wear his boot and walk almost as well as ever.
Father and Uncles M. and D. went away Monday morning, Uncle Dole went to Georgia, Father and Uncle Moses accompanied him as far as Vicksburg.
The weather continues mild and pleasant, we had a little rain Tuesday
The first day of Spring! and worthy indeed is this delightful day
to bear the name, the air soft and balmy seems to woo her to bestow
her leaves and buds upon us, while the birds all sing a merry welcome,
yea, Spring, bright joyous, beautiful Spring is again with us, how
happy I feel to think we shall soon luxuriate in her beautiful flowers,
even as we now rejoice in her warm air and gentle breezes. As I sit
here I can almost fancy that through the song of the birds I hear her
joyous voice
Saturday night Father, Uncle Moses and Aunt Jane came, Pa had to send after the carriage, so that they did not get here until after nine o'clock. I was very tired, and became quite sleepy before they arrived; Father stayed at home Sunday but was very much fatigued and slept nearly all the time, he left Monday morning, Uncle Moses left Sunday evening. I really do not know why I am writing, for I have nothing particular to say; I was waiting for Aunt Jane to get ready for a walk, and thought I would note down her arrival.
The weather is cooler today, the wind is quite sharp; yet the bright green grass which is just springing up in some places and the oak blossoms which now cover the trees, remind us that Spring in here.
Aunt Jane left us Thursday, after having paid us a visit of nearly
two weeks, she and Uncle Moses expect to go to Georgia soon. While she
was here we took some long walks in the woods; it is now delightful to
walk out, vegetation is bursting into life and beauty on every side, the
Truly what is life without affection, and yet when we survey life, when we recollect how our short pilgrimage is full of fruitless cares and idle sorrows, life seems as a fitful dream, until it is again dignified by the thought that God has placed us here to prepare ourselves for heaven; and when we reflect that our little cares and sorrows even the very least of them were deemed worthy of the endurance of our God, and there is a Christ who hath died for sinners. truly life loses its insignificance and becomes grand when studied by the light of Calvary.
Whenever I for a moment lose sight of the bible and of religion,
my mind becomes involved in mazy labyrinths of doubt 'till I almost
question the fact of my existence and wonder if I am not one of the
fabled creations of ancient days, and I can conceive of no greater
agony than that feeling that one is without God in the world, cut
loose from the idea of a Creator upon what can the soul anchor itself?
having rejected the first idea of nature, what shall we accept, where
or in whom shall we place confidence, shall we believe the conceptions
of minds, or the inspirations of souls which are subject to dissolution
and final death? without Faith and confidence in something life is a
desert and the grave is a terrible doom, the end of life, the termination
of a destiny, the quenching of a human soul, which existed only to suffer
and if not to suffer became degraded to a level with the body.
Why should that be thought evil which is our only true good? why
should an affectionate parent wish to see a child forgetful of its
highest earthly, its only heavenly good, and doom it to fear the terrors
of a God whose only attribute is justice and whose favour can be obtained
only by performances, the very suggestion of which excites despair
by proving their impossibility?
Father has been here ever since Saturday until this evening, when
he left for Vicksburg. I said he has been here, I should have added he
has spent his nights here, for he leaves after breakfast in the morning
and does not return until sunset, or sometimes dark in the evening.
The foot which Father sprained by falling from the bridge is now
nearly well, but while he was at Independence last week a heavy piece
of iron fell upon the other one, and hurt it badly. When he returned
Father is now Superintendent of the Vicksburg, Shreveport and Texas railroad, the company have concluded to go on with the construction of the road, and Uncle Moses has decided to build the bridge over the Ouachita for them.
Father has I think determined to build out here, we all went this
morning to look at a building site on a hill near Dr. Young's residence,
and owned by him, if Father can afford it and is willing to do it, there
is nothing which I desire more. I do so want a home.
I believe I have not mentioned that Mother answered an advertisement for a situation as a Teacher, she received a letter from the lady Saturday, and was very well pleased with it. The lady has been teaching twenty years, teaches English, French, drawing, painting, music and embroidery, in her own words endeavors to fit her pupils to discharge the duties of daughter, wife or Mother; she is a Virginian, an Episcopalian, and finally, a maiden lady without relatives. She desires more than anything else a comfortable home and likes the country, her salary is moderate, six hundred dollars a year.
Mother wrote a letter in reply, stating our unsettled situation,
but expressing her desire to obtain her services and a readiness for
further correspondence if the lady should be willing to consider the
subject favourably towards us. Mother composed and wrote the letter,
Father read it, noted his objections, and ended by revising it and
Uncle Moses spent last night with us, he and Willie have bought an old mill house and engine and are going to saw the timber for the bridge in partnership.
Father returned from Vicksburg Friday, and has not been away, except to Monroe since.
Last night General Wyrick and Mr. Mitchell from Georgia, came out to see us, the return to Vicksburg this evening and I think Father intends to go with them.
I received a letter from Miss Valeria a few days ago, she has a new brother, at whose advent she is very much rejoiced; her letter was very interesting, and if it had not been, I was so glad to hear from her that I should have imagined it interesting. I also received a letter from Miss Lou Garrett by the same mail, Dr. Young tells me that Mrs. Garrett wrote him that Charlie, her second son, had stabbed a boy dangerously; Miss Lou did not mention it probably she did not know it, when she wrote. I am indeed sorry for Mrs. Garrett, her misfortunes have been so many, and this is the greatest of all.
This is a delightful day, we had a heavy rain yesterday morning, and the trees are leaving out fast. We all walked up to Dr. Young's this morning, and stayed a few minutes, on the way we gathered some beautiful dogwood flowers, almost dazzling in their whiteness.
I have been reading Redgauntlet this morning, I am much interested
in it, the engraving of “Greenmantle” in my Waverly gallery is
very much like my friend Miss Valeria, & I fancy that their characters
resemble each other somewhat.
I have read Ivanhoe, Rob Roy, The Pirate, Peveril of the Peak, and the black dwarf all aloud; we select the novels from the engravings, reading about our favorite heroines first, of course, of the pictures I think Alice Bridgenorth is the most beautiful, though she does not play so conspicuous a part as her face entitles her to.
Uncle Moses was at Willie's camp yesterday but did not come up here, he and Willie are very busy about their mill.
Father returned home Friday night in a storm of wind and hail, the hailstones were very large but fortunately the shower was short, and did not damage the fruit at all.
Spring has now ascended her leafy throne and her sway is complete, the little blue violets are fast disappearing, and all the trees have leaved out almost entirely.
Mr. John Green the engineer of this road was here Saturday night
and part of Sunday morning, all the time I found myself making, not perhaps
comparisons, but comparing him with Mr. Robt. or as we say, little
Mr. Green, and I think nearly always, excepting of course the point of
stature, in the favor of the latter. I think Mr. John Green not quite
so polite, certainly not so polished as Mr. Robt. but more talkative
and easier to become acquainted with. Altogether the taller Mr. Green
has a lighter mind and perhaps less sterling qualities. Father thinks
them both excellent persons and to Father's opinion I nearly always lean.
Sunday afternoon we walked up to our place, which is now bought,
so delightful to have a home in such
near prospect, I am thinking about it nearly all the time, they commenced
clearing out the undergrowth this morning. Father, Willie, Miss
Mary, Lory and I went up there and spent about half an hour in looking
at them and directing them how to cut. Willie seven or eight hands
there, and the clearing will soon be completed, Father has drawn the plan
of the house, it is to be all on one story; a hollow square with a
court in the centre and piazzas all round, inside and out, the number
of rooms is twenty, counting in dressing rooms bath rooms Storeroom,
pantry, and so forth. Father has projected innumerable improvements
and beauties to be placed on our two hills, I hope they will be realized.
Father left us for Vicksburg this afternoon. We are expecting Aunt Jane tonight.
Aunt Jane has been here nearly two weeks and will probably remain
two more. Since I wrote last, we have had a great deal of rain. Willie
went to Monroe a week ago today with a team to haul out the boiler for
their mill, it commenced raining Wednesday night, rained Thursday, and
poured down Thursday night, in consequence of this the creeks all overflowed
their banks, bridges were reported swept away, and the mud was
perfectly
We were sitting down quietly after dinner, I reading Waverly and Miss Mary and Aunt Jane listening, when we heard a familiar voice holloa Whoa! we jumped, ran out to the door and there was Father, dripping wet, he had ridden all the way from Monroe in the rain. He went to the fire and we left him to change his clothes, hardly had we got out when Mrs. Adams' buggy drove up with Mother, while she was getting out, the galloping of horses hoofs was heard and turning round we beheld Willie, urging Mollie to her greatest speed, dressed in a thin pair of summer pants and without a coat. He dashed into the house and almost his first sentence after saluting us was “Sadie, I have lost your letters”; they were some which I had sent to be mailed. I was too glad to see Willie back in safety to care anything about my letters.
Saturday and Sunday Father remained at home, we have had no rain
since Friday until this morning. Yesterday we had all just set out to
visit our place before Father went in to Monroe, we had passed out the
gate and were walking up the road when we met Mr. Raoul, we were all
perfectly astonished but very much pleased to see him, he said that he
had come up to Vicksburg intending to go out to Meridian (on the Southern
road) with Mr. Smedes and Mr. Green, but that Mr. Smedes had put it
I think this will be a real rainy day, it commenced before breakfast and has continued ever since. I do not mind it so much now as Willie has brought the boiler nearly to the mill, but I would rather it would not rain until he had it all the way.
Ah, me! Shall I ever finish recording the accidents of this unhappy year; poor Willie is the sufferer this time, he has cut his foot, not dangerously to be sure but seriously enough to prevent his walking for two or three days. He was driving a plank under the waggon wheel yesterday afternoon, with the eye of an axe when the helve broke, the axe flew off upon a plank and then rebounding cut through his boat and wounded his foot near the joint of the great toe, cutting one or two small arteries. He immediately mounted a mule and came home, when he arrived his foot had bled nearly a quart, and was still bleeding profusely, his whole boot and the clothes which he had wrapped around were full of clotted blood.
Mother immediately sent for Dr. White, who arrived in a few minutes, stopped the blood and bound up the foot, it is doing very well now, but Willie is so restless and anxious to attend to his business that we can scarcely keep him still. The boiler is at last at the mill, after having been nine days on the way.
I am not very well, all day yesterday, that is after 10 o'clock,
I was confined to the couch with a dreadful headache.
I am afraid war is inevitable, Ft. Sumter is ours by surrender, Ft.
Pickens has been reinforced and was to be attacked on the 15th. The
President of the United States has issued a proclamation which may be
considered a virtual declaration of war, and which must irritate the
south, he refuses to recognise the claim of the Southern confederacy
to a place in the family of nations, but considers secession rebellion
and commands all persons forming this ''combination” to disperse and
regain their position as peaceful citizens of the United States in
twenty days. He says that the rights and property of all peaceful citizens
shall be respected, this proclamation was issued before the
Charleston guns had compelled the surrender of Ft. Sumter, since then,
from the tenor of the dispatches we may suppose that Lincoln has wavered
a little; Oh! how melancholy, how melancholy is the state of our country,
never since the death of Cain was such unnatural, uncalled for war; where
is the reason of the North fled, she has utterly withdrawn her light,
what do they purpose? What benefits can they have in view that they
will introduce all the horrors of civil war into our country, think they,
that they can compel the South into a Union which they have so perfidiously
disregarded, Oh! rather will every man, woman, and child perish
upon the soil that gave them birth and from which they draw their sustenance
rather than call down the curses of our free Forefathers upon the
degenerate race who could stoop to ask admittance again
My heart shrinks and all my bravery seems to fly when I think
of what may come upon us, but we are in the right, and he who ruleth the
Earth and who is King however much the people rage together, he will
protect us. He protected our Forefathers, who in the first revolution,
a little band of Patriots dared to withstand the hordes which Englishmen
sent to subdue them, and though our enemies are greater in number
and in resources than we, we have truth on our side and truth must prevail.
Recruiting officers are all around the country, it is humbling to see them reeling with intoxication, and urging with profane tongues the cause of liberty and independence, yet these mean instruments must be tolerated for the great end which we have in view. Mother's half brother, Horace Holton, is serving at Ft. Morgan.
Father went to New Orleans Tuesday, he will not return until Saturday night. Mr. John Green spent the day here Sunday, and took dinner with us on Tuesday.
The cleaning is still going on up at our place, Willie's negro men are getting out sills; The place looks more beautiful to me every time I go up there, which is about once every two day.
Father returned last night, he is looking very well, but is not so
A very sorrowful accident happened yesterday to a man who was getting out timber for Uncle Moses, a large limb lodged in a tree, and fell upon this man, as he was walking under it, crushing the bones in shoulder and injuring his head so severely that he died in less than an hour. Willie and Uncle Moses have gone to see him buried this morning, they say he is a lone man, without friends or relatives to care for him; but a few short months ago Willie himself narrowly escaped a death so sudden and so painful, can he ever cease to thank God for his goodness?
Virginia has seceded, General Scott has resigned his position as
commander in chief of the United States Army and tendered his services
to Virginia (his native state). Tennessee has offered us troops, the
requirements of President Davis have been fully met by the Confederate
States; our people have determined to fight to the last and lastly we
have right and Liberty on our side, if war must come we are prepared to
meet it. Father says if he were a younger man he would have been among
the first to offer his services to the government, as it is, if the North
prosecutes her madness, so far as to enter our country, of course he
will enroll; who knows what may be before us, but whatever comes, it is
woman's lot to wait and pray; if I were a man—but I am not; my
spirit of ten makes me chafe at the regulations which it is right a
This is one of my dark days, one in which I feel weak so wicked, I struggle against it but cannot overcome;
when when shall I learn to trust Providence, when shall I cease
to care about the disappointments of this world.
Father returned in safety last night, there is no news, except
that General Scott has not resigned, nor does he intend to.
Father went to Monroe this morning. The Mississippi is rising, great fears are entertained of an overflow.
It is quite a long time since I have written here, not because I
have been very busy, not because I have been sick as my last entry
makes it appear probable, only I have not felt like it, and then I
might as well not write anything as such entries as my last few,
thoughts and reflections indeed, they seem very sensible when I am
writing them, but when I look over them afterwards I do not know
whether to laugh or blush, but I must be careful not to go on with
a page full of them now, for Uncle Jim is going up to the place and
Well! I have been to the place and returned, Miss Mary and I, just in time to escape the dark; and after resting and brushing my hair, for supper I sit down to write a little.
On our way up to the place I saw Mrs. Reynolds out before the door milking and stopped to speak to her, she told me some news, Carrie Young, the doctor's eldest daughter, came home with him night before last, she is six months older than I am and was to have graduated at Nashville, Tenn. next month, her Mother spent the day here Wednesday and said she did not expect her until the last of June, her coming was therefore very unexpected.
Father went to Vicksburg Tuesday, we expect him back tonight; Uncle Moses was there yesterday, he says that they are afraid that the levees are broken up above, the river is rising more slowly and they do not apprehend an overflow.
Our house is begun, or at least the carpenter is engaged, the spot
cleared and staked and a shelter erected to work under, we are only to
have three rooms this summer, one a future school room, which is to be
larger and more finished than the other two, which are to be moved if
Father decides to remain and erect a house upon the place; we have to
move from here, by the first of next month, Father tried to get our time
extended but could not, and a few days since a lady told Mother that Mrs.
Bry sent her word she should be out here the first of June and wanted
her house.
Uncle Moses' and Willie's mill has commenced sawing.
Aunt Jane has been sick for the last ten days, she suffers much,
Mr. Elbridge Pierce came out to the mill Wednesday, he is to help Willie; he is not very well now, having been sick with chills for some time.
Father has staid at home three whole days, that is, he has not been
anywhere except to the mill and up to the place, Oh it will be so hard
to have him go away again, he says he must go to New Orleans either this
evening or tomorrow. I will begin and give the record of the days since
Friday: Saturday afternoon I went up to Mrs. Young's to see her daughter
Carrie, whom I found very pleasant, although I had a slight feeling
that my manners might seem a little brusque by the side of the tall,
sedate boarding school young lady, who being just from school has not
had time to settle into our country ways. She is quite tall and slender
with a small face and features, dark eyes and hair and a very good complexion
with no freckles; what a contrast to me, short, thick, square
faced and large featured, grey eyes, reddish yellow hair and a complexion
once fair but now, between tan and freckles almost brown, I do not mind
all the rest, but as I looked at Carrie I said to myself as I have often
said before, “if I was only tall”.
Father came up to Dr. Young's and walked home with me, Dr. and Mrs. Young and their daughter came as far as our place where we stopped to see how the builders were getting on, they have erected the frame of an out house which we are to occupy at first, but which is afterwards to serve as kitchens and servant's rooms while we live at the “school house”.
Sunday we were as usual all together, with the addition of some
visitors, Mr. Pierce came up with Wilhe in the morning and stayed some
Mr. Green has joined a company in Madison County of this state, he is a private, the company is called the Madison Infantry; his conversation was upon the subject of Soldiers and Soldiering generally, and was on that account interesting to me; he left some time after dinner.
Late in the afternoon, Miss Bry with a young friend called to see us, they had been spending the day with Mrs. Adams; their call was short and on both sides a very little constrained.
Yesterday morning, Father took us all down to the mill in the carriage, one of the springs of which was broken, and which Father spent several hours in mending, his trade is that of a Blacksmith and though he has had no practice for many years he has not forgotten how to shoe a horse or weld a piece of iron. I spent the day in watching Father, looking after the children and sitting in the mill observing their motions, before we left they commenced to saw, and Miss Mary and I amused ourselves very much watching their operations.
Uncle Moses was the only one who really understood what was to be
done and it was really laughable to see him run from the boiler to the
engine, then to the saw, then to the end of the log, where an inexperienced
negro was turning the wrong way, then up stairs to look at the cistern;
every little while vociferating orders in no very mild tone of voice,
We came home in time to go up to the place and see what was doing. Father has a carpenter, two white men and a negroe up there at work on our “shanty”.
Aunt Jane has very sick today, I was quite alarmed this evening;
for Mother went up to see Mrs. Axley (our carpenter's wife) whose sister's
child is dead, and I did not know what I should do if she were to be
Father has been at the mill all day it is time he was returning now. We had a heavy rain last night and it has been quite cool all day, we had a little fire this morning.
Aunt Jane has gone to Monroe, she left Saturday in the carriage and bore the journey very well, Eva met Uncle Moses yesterday and he said that Aunt Jane was just as sick as she was here.
Father returned from New Orleans Sunday night, and remained at home
Yesterday, he expects to leave for Vicksburg today, but John was quite
sick last night and he may not go, we were afraid last night that John
Mother, Father and I went up to the place yesterday evening and from thence to Dr. Young's, we rode home in the “big waggon.”
The place is getting to look more cultivated, the shed for us is not half done yet, and those for the negroes not commenced, and we have only ten days more in this house!
I received a letter from Miss Lou Garrett last night, she invited me to come down to Handsboro and see her, quite an impossibility.
It is quite cool this morning, but was oppressively warm yesterday and the day before.
The last day of the month, a month passed with but little improvement to me, I have idled away too much time which might have been improved. Mr. and Mrs. Horne, Leila and Howell came to see us Monday night, and after a very pleasant visit, as far as we were concerned, left yesterday afternoon.
Father has gone to Chatanooga to attend a railroad convention, he will probably go to Savannah and will be gone two weeks, a long time, and which it saddens me to think must be passed without him, he left yesterday afternoon with the Horne's, Mother accompanied them to Monroe, and visited Aunt Jane who, Mother thinks, is looking very well indeed.
Mr. Axley (Father's carpenter) has been sick for a week. Father has engaged another carpenter who will begin work tomorrow. Major Bry has allowed us to remain here until the 15th of June.
Willie is not well, he was taken with a very sore tongue Saturday afternoon, went to Dr. White, who gave him a wash and some pills, his a little tongue is a little better, but is still very painful indeed.
The new carpenter has gone to work and our “shanty” seems in a fair way of building after all, Mother has undertaken to board the carpenter, he is a Yankee, but has been South five years and now classes himself with the Southerners.
We had a delightful rain yesterday, it came just in time, for the gardens were quite dry and the roads very dusty. I am writing before breakfast having risen at half past five to be ready for the early breakfast which Mother has on the carpenter's account.
The morning is delightful, everything looks so cheerful, gilded by the morning sunlight, the birds too are singing very sweetly.
Afternoon—Mr. John Green has just left, he came to bid us goodbye his company leaves Saturday or Monday, Captain George Wardell.
Father sent Mother a letter by Mr. Green, saying that there is a rumour that invasion is threatened on the North of Arkansas, and that if this rumour is true Willie must mount his horse, throw business to the winds and fly to defend our homes, and yet Willie is sick, my heart turns faint as I write it, his tongue is worse and he thinks ulcers are forming in his throat. Oh! if it should be the dreaded canker! Mother will take him to Monroe this evening to consult a doctor there. May God in his mercy avert this trial.
Willie's tongue is much better, the improvement became perceptible yesterday. Last night we had a joyful surprise, Miss Mary and I were in our night dresses when Rose came into the room exclaiming “Miss Sarah and Miss Mary come and see your Pa” “I ain't fooling you he is come”, hardly believing her we went into the room, and there sure enough was Father, I have not seen him yet this morning, and do not know what news he brings.
Mother's drygoods from New Orleans came up the other day and we are all quite busy sewing. Miss Mary and I went to Mrs. Axley's yesterday to have some things fitted. Mr. Axley is still sick.
The weather as may be expected in June, is warm; Thursday was a very oppressive day.
Once more I feel that I am justified in using the word “home”,
and though our home is very rude and very much crowded still a feeling
of satisfaction comes over me when I think that for the first time
in more than three years, our house and land, little as it is, is yet
ours. But it has been a long time since I have written any, and I
must briefly note the events which have occurred since “June the 8th”.
In the first place Willie has gone back to the mill, his tongue is
Father went to Vicksburg Sunday afternoon but returned Thursday
morning, and then we commenced moving. Father slept up here Thursday
and Friday nights, Friday after dinner I came up and spent the evening
in arranging furniture and clothing and Saturday night Miss Mary, Eva
Sunday night we came up here to sleep, leaving Mother as before,
Monday morning walked down to breakfast again and rode back on the wagon,
in the afternoon Mother came up and Monday night for the first time we
It really would be amusing to a person not initiated into the
customs of Southern country people to have seen how we lived, our
house is a long low building divided at one end by a partition into
two rooms, the end room, which is occupied by Mother, Father, George
and the baby is about 17 feet square and has two
For the sake of my amusement in some subsequent hour when we shall have exchanged our present residence for a more roomy one and when I may have become partially oblivious to our present state I subjoin an inventory of the furniture contained in this last mentioned room.
There are two bedsteads, two wardrobes, three bureaus, one large
chest, one grand piano, with stool, one couch, two washstands with
towel horses, three large trunks and one small one, two kegs of nails,
one rocking horse, one box of tools, one side saddle and a great many
chairs, besides this there are numberless bandboxes, baskets and toys
lodged on the tops of the two wardrobes, and on the boards overhead before
spoken of. I count four trunks, three valises a box of sash, five
pillows and one bolster a broken table and a frame for a couch sundries; to fill up the picture it must be
Besides the house I have described we have a kitchen which is set upon blocks and the boards nailed on about two inches apart, which gives it the appearance of a large birdcage, between the house and the kitchen connecting with both and walled like the latter there is a room which we use as a dining room and in which we keep the safes. We have as yet no storeroom nor stable, the mules and horses are kept at Mr. Bry's still, but will be removed with Uncle Jim to Willie's old camps tomorrow.
We have not any well yet, but get our water from Dr. Young's; Sallie
is still at Mr. Bry's and will not come up here until she finishes the
Father a negroe man and a boy raking up the leaves, grubbing up the roots and cutting down the bushes in our yard, this is a very pretty place, though not as beautiful or as susceptible of improvement as the other hill upon which I hope Father will build a permanent residence.
I rode down to Mr. Axley's with Father yesterday, I rode Railroad, at first I was rather afraid, as it has been nearly two years since I was on horseback before and Railroad is very tall, but I soon became quite easy and enjoyed the ride very much.
Father went to Vicksburg yesterday afternoon, we expect him back
Ah! I am nearly on the last leaf of this old book, this book which has been my companion for almost two years, which has been with me from Louisiana to Canada and which has been the repository of many feelings both of joy and sorrow.
I cannot close it without one brief sentence concerning my country,
on Sunday we received the latest news, affairs in Virginia remain the
same, both parties are concentrating their forces but there has been
no fight beyond a few slight Skirmishes. But developments are being made
in another direction,
But Mother calls me to walk with her, goodbye, dear journal, this is my last entry in this book and for the first time I feel how dear it has become to me
From Amite to Jackson, Miss. by the N. O. J.
From Jackson to Vicksburg arriving at V. 8 1/2 P.M. by the Southern R.R.
From Vicksburg to Memphis—left V. 6 1/2 A.M. Friday the 26th Aug. on Steamer Capitol, arrive at Memphis Sunday 10 A.M.
From Memphis to St. Louis—left M. at 5 1/2 A.M. on the Memphis &
Ohio R.R. change cars at Humbolt, from Humbolt to Columbus, Ky.
on the Mobile & Ohio R.R. took the boat at Columbus, the W. A. Eaves
to Cairo, took cars at Cairo, from Cairo to Centralia Ill. on the
Ill. Central R.R. Arrive at Centralia 10 P.M. stayed the over night.
From St. Louis to Chicago—Took the Steamer Baltimore at St. Louis at 7 A.M. for Alton, 25 miles above St. Louis. Took the St. Louis, Alton, and Chicago R.R. at Alton for Chicago, Arrived at C. about 10 1/2 P.M.
This is my first entry in my new journal book, the leaves are all fresh and fair, let me try to keep them unsullied by evil thoughts and the record of evil actions, yet to do this and still keep a faithful record my life must be pure, I would that one mighty effort might achieve this, then should I achieve it, but as this may not be, I must watch against the little trials which tempt me to daily sins.
Our first Sunday at our new home has been past as usual alltogether; Willie stays here now, he has sold his interest in the mill to Mr. Pierce, and will stay there no more.
This morning after breakfast Rose went over to Mrs. Young's to enquire if the Doctor had come, she brought word that he had not and that Carrie was sick in bed. Mother thought, I had better go and see Carrie, so Miss Mary and I went over, we found that it was only one of Rose's exaggerated messages and that Carrie was no worse than usual, only she had taken some medicine which weakened her and consequently she had not yet risen. We stayed nearly an hour but she did not come out, she has not been well since she returned home.
I have been spending today very quietly trying to strengthen myself
against the incursions of fretfulness and illtemper which so often
cloud my horizon. I am often tried since we removed here, I can have no
privacy or quiet and I have been so much indulged in both since my earliest
years that they are almost necessary for my happiness, but I can
only conquer myself this trial will be useful to me.
It is very warm, the thermometer at 95°, every one of the family
except me are lying on beds and couches or leaning back in rocking chairs
with palm
We, Father and I, left home yesterday afternoon, for this place. I have been dreading for a long time to have my teeth examined by a dentist lately one of them commenced to ache, I could no longer put off the evil day and so I came to Vicksburg with Father, we arrived here safely this morning.
I have just come from Dr. Miles, have had four teeth filled and some tartar removed, it was not half as bad as I expected, being more tiresome than painful. Dr. Miles was so gentle and kind, that I suffered nothing from fear, the corners of my mouth are the greatest sufferers, they feel as if stretched out of all shape.
I have been lying down to refresh me a little before the evening, we rose so early this morning that I felt a little dull, but am quite bright now.
Mr. Green came in to see me after dinner, Father had business over
the river and left me to entertain him alone, his visit was very pleasant
indeed, he converses so easily that one cannot feel embarrassed in his
company, he is very anxious to go to the war, and thinks he will go;
said he would be back to see us tonight.
I must dress for supper now, 'tis nearly dark; and Father must find me ready when he comes, he did not know the dinner hour, and came in so late that he had not time to eat his dinner.
Mr. Green came to tea, has just left, he has decided
to go to the wars, is elected Captain, but the company is not yet full;
I have a few minutes before breakfast this morning, and having nothing else to do, I sit down to write about our journey here, which I said nothing about yesterday, having other matters to occupy my attention. After a very pleasant drive of two hours, we reached Monroe at about six o'clock. Left my trunk at the Hotel, and went to see Aunt Jane. I found her in very good spirits and a tolerable degree of health, she says she is sick one day and well the next.
Father came for me about dusk accompanied by Major Bry, we walked
through some very pleasant streets and soon arrived at the New Hotel,
the Ouachita Hotel. Mrs. Riley, the hostess, who is both literary and
matronly, received me with a “welcome, my dear”, and Father leaving me
for a time, entertained me almost unremittingly till his return; after
tea she enquired, quite unexpectedly to me, what kind of reading I was
fond of, I replied that all kinds were alike
The house was so full that I was put in the room with Mrs. Dr. Young of Sunton, she was on her way to Virginia to visit her husband, who is in the army, she is a very nice and pleasant Lady.—
We rose very early yesterday morning and left on the cars just as the sun was rising, I enjoyed my ride to Vicksburg very much, there was very little dust in the cars, we had a fine breeze, and the woods looked very beautiful; besides this Mrs. Young was very pleasant and her companion Mr. Oliver quite as much so, I should have been glad if Father and I had been going all the way to Virginia with them, Mrs. Young wished me to go, and I know Father would have liked the journey had circumstances been favorable. Mrs. Young and Mr. Olivar left on the Southern cars yesterday afternoon.
I went out after breakfast to make a few purchases, and have just been lying down preparatory to dressing for dinner, nothing tries me so much as to go into a number of stores, I did not want much but had to visit a number of places to get what I did want. We leave this afternoon at two.
We arrived at home safely Wednesday night, found Mother in bed with a headache, Thursday she was worse and yesterday she was very sick, sent for the Doctor yesterday evening, Dr. Straughter from Monroe; he prescribed for Mother last night, spent the night at Dr. Young's and came again this morning. Mother is very weak indeed, I think she is a little better this evening, Miss May was taken sick yesterday, the Dr. says she has bilious fever, left her a powder this morning and gave her salts, she complains greatly of weakness, but I think her improving.
Father is scarcely able to be up, he looked very badly Wednesday,
is better now, but has barely escaped a spell of sickness.
I am very busy all the time, I snatched a few minutes while Mother
I have not written in here in so long a time because I have been hardly able to perform the manifold duties that have fallen upon lately, and of course would not have felt justified in taking any time for writing. Since Wednesday I have had a very bad cold, for two days it seemed almost impossible for me to sit up, indeed I did lie down all Thursday evening; yesterday and today I have felt much better.
Poor Miss Mary is in bed yet, Saturday was the first day she has
missed her regular chill and fever, she is very weak and has grown very
thin indeed, she is much more nervous than we expected from her and is
easily disturbed by noise, though poor girl she cannot have much quiet,
we are so situated that it is almost if not quite impossible to get a
Our little baby is very sick, he has had a had cold all the week, and was threatened with the croup all Friday night, Saturday and last night, today he is scarcely any better, he is very weak. Georgie also has been suffering from a bad cold, this week, he is much better now.
Mother has been sitting up since Wednesday, but has not been out of her room until yesterday, she is now very well again.
Father left us for New Orleans Monday evening and returned last
night, he is looking very well again. Father received a letter from
Mr. John Green while away, he writes that his company is encamped near
Richmond to drill, they have not, as they hoped, been called into immediate
service, but are being well prepared to fight when they do engage;
Mr. J. Green says nothing about his own situation or feeling, but
course he is contented.
The fourth of July passed very quietly here, my mind was so much
right that the feeling
should have been more of sober thankfulness and religious prayer than
of noisy joy.
We have had a nice rain this evening, it is very refreshing for the day has been very warm, Aunt Jane spent the day with us Friday she was looking very well, and was very pleasant.
There has been a comet visible for some nights past, I went out to see it Friday night, it was very beautiful, but its brightness was beginning to wane. I was sorry that I had not been well enough to have seen it at first.
The rain has cleared away, and the son is hastening to a clear setting,
this is the most delightful part of our Sabbath, it is a time
when our thoughts are insensibly drawn away from Earth and when, looking
at the declining sun
How delightful a quiet Sabbath evening, in its stillness arise thoughts that strengthen us to bear our daily burden through the busy week, until the blessed season comes again.
But if the day has not been consecrated to God the calmness of the
evening only affords a silent time when accusing actions can rise up
I realize lately how near death always is, he can enter every
where; no precaution is able to bar him out. Why not then look death
steadily in the face; why not accustom ourselves to the contemplation
of the grave, as something which we must encounter and which we cannot
destroy by looking away from it. Why not live in the constant
John is very much better, he commenced to improve late Sunday evening, and has been quite bright since, but is still pale and rather fretful. Mother thinks it is the cutting of his jaw teeth.
Miss Mary had another chill this morning, she seemed very much better yesterday afternoon and sat up some time, but this chill has prostrated her completely, she is very low spirited too.
My cold is nearly well, I feel better today than I have for a week.
I took salts yesterday and it completely freed me from the headache from
which I have been suffering the past week. I have been taking some
horseback rides lately, yesterday morning I rode out with Father, and
this morning I went down to the mill with him, we left quite early, but
Father had a mule which he wished to shoe, and this, with some other
duties detained him so long that we did not get back home until eleven
o'clock; we had a delightful ride for though the sun was shining very
warm, we came by a bridle path through the woods and did not feel the
Mrs. Nobles, one of our neighbors, called to see Mother this morning,
she gave us a paper from the
Dr. Young's oldest son, Adam, has returned from school for vacation, I have not seen him yet, he is younger than Carrie.
I have been so much
The officers elected were, Mrs. Robles, president, Miss Josephine Friend, vice president, Miss Bry, treasurer, and Miss Sarah Wadley, secretary. The next meeting is a week from next Thursday.
Thursday afternoon I went down to see Mrs. Adams and intended to
go to Major Bry's but found his daughter at Mr. Adams, and consequently
spent the evening there. Friday morning rode down to the camps with
Willie, and paid a visit to Mrs. Hodge Adams; in the afternoon went
down to see the Misses Bry, spent a very pleasant hour in the society
of the family. Saturday morning the quarterly meeting at the Methodist
Church commenced, I went to Church, and heard a sermon, which, though
neither elegant nor very tasteful, did me good by giving new impetus
After service the presiding elder made a few remarks about our
sewing society for the soldiers and invited all the ladies to join it.
Dr. Young, who was present, proposed that the gentlemen should all retire
and leave the ladies
This morning I went to Church again, Miss Marshall went with me, and I found her very agreeable, she has been very well educated and has mixed with good society for two or three years. The Church was very full today, quite a number of people were obliged to remain outside for want of room in the Church. The text was from Romans, upon Christian duty, the minister was very well at home upon this subject, and preached a very good sensible sermon, it was rather long, and many persons complained of fatigue but I was not much tired.
The Communion was administered to the white members and then to
the negroes; I thought the Communion of the negroes was very affecting,
more so than that of the whites; slaves seem so much more dependent,
their position in society makes their deportment so much more humble,
that it is peculiarly interesting to see them receive the spiritual
body and blood of Christ.
Altogether, service was to me quite impressive, the surroundings
Willie has joined a company in Trenton, he drilled for the first time yesterday. It is a home guard and will only leave in case of a call for more troops. Willie went to Church with us this morning.
Miss Mary is very much better, she has not had chill since Tuesday she rode out Friday for the first time.
Mother and I went to Mrs. Wilson's yesterday afternoon, found her very pleasant.
Father went to Vicksburg Monday, and we expect him back tonight. Every thing has gone along very quietly this week. Mother and I went up to see Mrs. Williams yesterday afternoon, she is one of our near neighbors, and is a very pleasant, elderly lady, I became acquainted with her at the meeting of our society.
I have taken my morning ride as usual, every day, this morning
Willie and I went along a delightful road through the woods, it was in
some places a rough bridle path and the leaves often formed a green
canopy over our heads. The beautiful Beech tree grew abundantly in the
low lands, and on the hills oaks and
There is to be a concert and supper in Monroe tonight, for the benefit of the Ladies Volunteer Aid society. I have been pressed to go by all my acquaintances around here, and Aunt Jane invited me to spend the night of the concert with her, but I thought it would be better for me not to go, I have no appropriate dress to wear. Father could not be at home to go with me and though I should no doubt have enjoyed after getting there, yet I felt no very great desire to go; Carrie Young is one of the performers, they expect to have very fine music.
Today has been quite warm, we have been expecting rain all day but
I do not think it will come, we are needing rain very much now, but I
We have had a delightful rainy day, we were needing rain and now
it has been granted and in just the right quantity and manner, this
morning it showered a little and remained cloudy with a very few short
intervals of sunshine until noon, when a pouring rain commenced and
continued for an hour. It has been cloudy ever since, and this rain
with the moist atmosphere will revive the verdant green all around, I
hope it has been general.
Yesterday I attended Sunday School at Church, a bible class has just been formed and I was happy to have the opportunity of joining one, we have not many members yet, but will probably have more in time.
Father returned Wednesday night as we expected, he left for Vicksburg again this evening. Mother and Miss Mary went to Monroe Friday, they spent the day with Aunt Jane at Dr. Roane's found Aunt Jane very well.
Our troops have achieved a great victory under Beauregard, the number engaged on either side is not known, the enemy attempting to advance were met at Bulls run near Manassas and a severe battle of an hour ensued, our troops gained a complete victory and the enemy retreated in confusion after a great loss; it is said that we lost very few.
Beauregard had a narrow escape, the Federalists having probably ascertained his whereabouts fired into the kitchen where he sat at dinner but he was unhurt. Strikingly illustrative of their disregard of the humanity, so to speak, of civilized warfare, is the fact that they fired into the hospital over which the yellow flag was flying.
It is said that ten thousand Federalists were repulsed by seven
God seems to aid us, he has thus far given us the victory.
How little can we
I have today to record a most splendid and complete victory achieved
by the southern army, we first received the news on Tuesday but fearing
lest it might not be authentic I waited till today to write about it.
We have now received full details. The battle was fought last Sunday,
commenced early in the morning and continued till after the darkness
came on, the number of troops on the United States side is said to be
somewhere near 60,000 we had not more than 35,000, the battle was hard
fought, at one time our position was critical but a reinforcement came
up and decided the day, the enemy fled precipitately leaving their wounded
It in said that General Scott was near the field of battle in his
carriage when they retreated he also left his carriage and escaped
in one direction while the vehicle drove off in another. The soldiers of
our army captured the carriage which contained his sword and
The accounts given of the Federal army are most disgraceful, it is said that among other things captured were a number of bills of fare, for most elaborate dinners to be given by McDowell on his march to Richmond.
Col. Francis Bartow of Georgia was killed, while heading a gallant charge of his regiment, he was a brave man and a competent officer, Father was well acquainted with him. The hand of providence is clearly seen in this victory, God fought on our side and nerved the hearts and hands of our soldiers else we had not been victorious, we are thankful for his goodness unto us.
Miss Mary, Eva, and I went to Sunday School this morning, we also
had a meeting for the purpose of testifying our thanks to God for this
great victory. Dr. Young preached, this was in accordance with a resolution
of the Confederate congress recommending the people to observe this
President Davis' message is all that we could have hoped from our hero statesman. Wise, moderate, and just in council, cool, brave and gallant in battle; firm, energetic and instant in the performance of his executive duties, truly we have in him a second Washington, there is in his message nothing rabid or undignified, his declarations are decided and explicit, but mild almost to gentleness; yet in the same paper which contains his message, we read of him on the battle field charging at the head of his troops and mingling personally in the affray.
We had our second meeting last Thursday, but little was done, we have not received letters from the volunteers and do not know what they want, shall probably have some sewing soon.
Willie has the chills and fever, he was taken Thursday, Mother has given him medicine and thinks she has broken the chills.
Father went to Vicksburg Monday, Miss Mary and Aunt Jane went in Wednesday, Miss Mary went to have her tooth attended to, she expected to have returned the same night but was obliged to remain until Thursday when she and Father both returned.
Mr. Robt. Green and his company leave for Virginia the last of next week, he said that he would be sure to come out and see us before leaving.
The first two or three days of this week were very cool but yesterday
and today have been very warm.
Today an accident happened which renders this day one of the memorable
days of our quiet life. Mother and I were sitting here very quietly
talking to Carrie Young who was over here, when Emmeline said, “Miss
We were perfectly astonished at this behaviour from the stage proprietors. I had not thought that there was any man in our midst who would not have speeded any of our soldiers on their way, especially an officer of the staff and on particular business.
The young man lived in Jefferson, Texas and went to the war as
Lieutenant in the Orleans Cadets, he was first ordered to Pensacola but
afterwards removed to Virginia, he was in the skirmish in which Col.
He left Richmond the day before the battle, but received a dispatch from a member of the Cabinet saying that the sword and epaulettes of Scott, also his carriage and horses had arrived in Richmond, and that the award was the same one presented to Scott by the ladies of Virginia! What must be his feeling, a traitor to his country, a fugitive, flying in a most disgraceful retreat, hated and in disgrace both North and South! We lent Lieutenant Hervey a saddle, bridle, and pair of saddle bags, and bade him a most fervent “God speed”.
Willie is much better today but is very weak, he looks badly. I would have thought a few days sickness could make so great a change.
Father and I rode down to the mill this morning, Father took John in his arms and carried him along, he was delighted with his ride for the first mile and then he went to sleep.
We called by Mrs. Hodge Adams', they leave for Texas tomorrow morning. Mrs. Adams is delighted to get away, she dislikes this country greatly but thinks Texas perfectly delightful.
Father went to Monroe after we returned, he was not here to see
Lieutenant Hervey, I know he will be angry when he hears of the conduct
Today is quite warm. Carrie Young spent two or three hours with us this morning, for the first time since she came home, hitherto she has only remained a few minutes, she has not been to see me before in three or four weeks. Mrs. Young has been sick, she was over here Saturday.
My last entry was filled with the description of Lieutenant Hervey and his mission, it is but fair that I should record Father's reception of our story, he merely laughed, surprised at this, we somewhat warmly asked what excited his mirth, he said he was laughing at our officer, on questioning him further we found out that he had met Lieutenant Hervey on the road, and he thought from his appearance that Davis would hardly have sent him on very particular business. Dr. Young says that the papers he offered to the stage proprietors were not Confederate bonds, but were spurious, the Dr. also says that this same man was at Bastrop last week, he was also at the concert in Monroe, his story and his actions do not tally at all, Dr. Young says he is sure that he is an imposter, Father is not so sure that he is altogether an imposter but is fully convinced that his rank and mission are not as important as he represented them.
After leaving here Lieutenant Hervey went over to Dr. Young's and
borrowed a horse from Mrs. Young after excited the sympathies of Mrs.
Y. and Mrs. Sthresthly he went on to a house about twelve miles from
here and told the same exciting story, he took the stage there, and the
gentleman of the house sent back Dr. Young's horse and our saddle and
bridle. We have seen or heard nothing more of the capture of Cairo, it
must have been an invention of Lieutenant Hervey's. Mother and I went
We met a preacher, a Mr. Armstrong of the methodist denomination. Father sent for us about dusk to come home to see Mrs. Williams who had called in our absence.
Mother and Father went to Monroe yesterday to spend the day, Father did not return, but goes to Vicksburg this morning. Mr. Boulineau one of the officers on the Southern railroad wants Father to go over the road and give him some advice, now that Mr. Green has given up the charge, Mr. B. will fill his place, assisted by Father's advice and occasional superintendence.
Mother attended the meeting of the Monroe Aid Society yesterday, she says that they had no work, but did a good deal of talking and writing, Mother says I must be more particular about my “minutes” I did not think it necessary to put down anything about our last meeting but I shall do so now.
Just after dinner yesterday an old lady and her son came to see us, Miss Mary and I were sitting in this front room when they came, and we could not imagine who they were, Willie soon came in and addressed the lady as Mrs. Brantley, she is one from whom Willie hired seven negroes when he went to work, she is a very nice old lady, she spent all the evening here, and also remained during the night.
Miss Mary has been busy making a curtain to hang up in our room in
case Mr. Robt. Green should come to stay all night; we expected him a
little last night and had the curtain all ready, he did not come, but
we had use for the curtain; there was a mistake about the beds, (Mrs.
Mrs. Brantley has fifteen children, she has three sons, two sons-inlaw and one grandson in our army, she came down to try to get a little money from Father, she said one of her sons had returned home on account of sickness and was now going back again and she wanted to give him some money and send some to his brothers, she said that if she could only get a hundred dollars that she would be satisfied. We were very sorry that Father was not at home, if he had been he would have strained every nerve to have paid her under such circumstances, but we had no money in the house and Father was not here; Father does not draw any salary now, the road is so pressed for money, and he is very much straitened; Mrs. Brantley says that around in her neighborhood every one has given almost their last cent of ready money to the war cause.
I called on Miss Julia Wilson Monday evening, found her at home, she was very pleasant, her Mother calls her wild, and some others have said the same, but she appeared only animated and pleasing, her demeanor was lady like and correct.
Mr. Hodge Adams and family left on Tuesday, Mother went down to bid
them goodbye. This is such a warm day, the thermometer stands at 96° in
the shade, it has been warm all day, but the heat is more intense now,
at one o'clock, I have taken off my dress and am sitting with a thin
apron over my shoulders; I did not till so late last night and rose so
early this morning that I feel quite badly, I have done nothing today,
except to write this journal and wipe off the perspiration, the sun
Mother, Miss Mary and I went over to Mrs. Marks this morning and spent an hour or two, Mrs. Marks is quilting a silk quilt, she showed it to us, it is very pretty indeed. It reminded me of Miss Valeria, when we were down there she showed us a quilt which she had begun, hers was made in little circles, each circle being composed of pieces which some friend had given her, in the centre was a white piece, with the donor's name written on it. Mrs. Marks looked very well today she bears her husbands absence with fortitude, maintaining sober cheerfulness all the time.
In Mrs. Marks manners I think she resembles Miss Valeria somewhat, they are both quiet and self possessed but converse easily and intelligently. Mrs. Marks is not so intellectual as Miss Valeria, nor is she quite so pleasant in conversation, that is to me, as is Miss Valeria.
Father made a windless to our well Saturday and we drink that water now, it is not so clear or so pleasant to the taste as Dr. Young's well water but tastes very well.
Mr. Axley to sick, has not worked any this week. Father has had all the sills hauled for our house, and Mr. Axley had just finished the outbuildings and was going to work on the house when he was taken sick; the summer is slipping away fast now, there are only two months more untill cold weather commences, and I am very much afraid the house will not be finished far enough for us to move into it in the winter; it seems almost impossible for us to live here in cold weather.
Willie has not had another chill but is very weak, he is very low-spirited too, he wants to go to the war and does not feel able to go; Father is very anxious that he should go at all hazards.
Rose had a dumb chill Tuesday and another yesterday, she is up today,
I did not intend to put off writing so long but have almost unconsciously deferred it from day to day.
Father returned home very unexpectedly to us all Friday night, Mother sent Uncle Jim to Monroe that night to get some butter and when he came back he brought word that Pa would be home on the stage. Pa said that he was not wanted in Vicksburg, and so he came home.
Sunday night Lieutenant Hervey came out to the gate about two
o'clock and called for his buggy, Father answered him that the owner of
the buggy had come and taken it, the Lieutenant then said that he had
gotten off the stage and was now in the open road with a lady, Father
told him that we could not take him in, that our shanty was “filled to
overflowing” but that he could probably get a shelter over at Dr. Young's,
the man went away and (according to his version) when he had gotten down
opposite, our house the lady fell down in a faint, he built a fire, and
as the night was dry concluded to wait there until morning. Mother got
up to attend to Rosa who was sick in the room and seeing the bright
light she imagined that it was Lieutenant Hervey and thinking that Dr.
Young might have refused him admittance, she felt sorry for the lady and
sent down to the fence to say to them that if they would come up she
would give them all that she could in the shape of lodging, the servant
returned and said that they were not there. Lieutenant Hervey says that
the servant did not go to the fire at all. In the morning Father was
going into Monroe with the carriage, (to bring Mr. Green out) and Mother
sent over to invite the Lieutenant and the lady to go in with him, soon
after breakfast the Lieutenant came over, he said that he had had great
Mother's kindness. Before I
dismiss this subject I must say (though not in regular order) that Mr.
Robt. Green says that Lieutenant Hervey has never been to Richmond!
that he has passed over the road several times from Camp Moore but never
from Richmond, and that the last time he passed he had a Lieutenant's
commission.
Monday afternoon, Mrs. Noble, Mrs. Marks, Mrs. Wilson and Miss Scarborough, Mrs. Wilson's niece, all came to see us, Miss Wilson was too sick to come out.
Monday night about half past ten or eleven o'clock Father and Mr.
Green came; I had been feeling badly all day and went to bed very early,
knowing that if I did not I should not be able to sit up on the morrow.
Tuesday Mr. Green spent the day with us, it was very pleasant and I enjoyed
his company an much as any one could who was only half able to
sit up. Mr. Green is really an admirable man and one whom it would be
a pleasure and a privilege to know intimately; there appears to be but
one defective point in his character the want of earnest religion, this
alas is a want which too many of us have to deplore; neither strictly
moral life or a poetical conception of Deity can supply the deficiency.
Mr. Green expects to leave for Virginia tomorrow, he may be duty
to go and he will not fail in this duty. His company are now called
We had a delightful rain yesterday afternoon, it commenced at
three o'clock and rained on steadily until nearly sunset. I was so glad,
and yet I partly regretted that it rained so long, because Father and
Mr. Green had to go to Monroe in the rain. Father went on to Vicksburg
too, we expect him to return tomorrow night.
Rose is very sick, Mother sent for the Doctor (Dr. White) Monday evening he pronounced her sickness inflammation of the bowels, has been attending on her ever since, she is no better, but her case is not one of the worst.
This has been a delightful morning, everything looks so green and fresh and the air is deliciously pure and cool.
Mr. Pierce spent the day with us Sunday, he is looking very well.
This is our society day, of course I was present, Miss Mary joined— Mother did not go, she could not leave Rose, and as she had been sitting up to give medicine until twelve o'clock for several nights she was very much fatigued.
I was very pleasantly surprised to see Mrs. Young of Trenton, my acquaintance of the cars, at the meetings she met me very cordially, she expected to remain in Virginia all summer, but when the militia was all called out, her husband thought it dangerous for her to remain and she returned with Mr. Oliver, not, however, until her husband promised her to come home the last of this month, but after she had come back she received a letter from him saying that he could not come home for there was so much sickness among the soldiers that he was needed there.
They say that Dr. Young loved another young lady but she jilted him and
very pleasant
lady; is boarding at Mr. Oliver's this summer, said that I had been so
kind to her in going to Vicksburg and during her brief stay there that
she wished to continue our acquaintance and would come to see me soon,
I hope she will; she joined the society today.
We have no work as yet, will probably have some at the next meeting; Mrs. Gainey gave us ten dollars today and also brought four pair of socks, Mrs. Friend sent twelve pair of socks.
Mother received a letter last night from Miss Stewart, she showed me the back of it this morning and asked me if I could guess who it was from. I could not, and she told me, I was never more perfectly surprised I had given up all idea of hearing from her again, she says in her letter that she answered Mother's letter saying that if we could make her only tolerably comfortable she would accept or the situation; but she directed her letter “Lynhurst” and consequently we never received it; she is now teaching in Vicksburg but her engagement will expire in September and she is then willing to come to us, that is if we have not filled the place. Mother is going to open negotiations immediately; oh! I do hope that she will prove to be a superior teacher and that we will be able to engage her, I must learn something soon I am fast approaching young lady hood and I am very ignorant.
Father has just come, we have been sitting up for him, I must now retire.
Mrs. C. G. Young and Carrie came over yesterday evening. Mrs. Nobles
Since the rain we have had very cool evenings and mornings, but at noonday it is quite warm, while I write (2 o'clock) the thermometer is a 97°. This morning when I went to ride this morning it was delightful, the fresh, cool air swept through the woods with that swift rustle which always reminds me of Autumn.
I have just found the following beautiful poem in the Monroe Intelligencer, as the paper is Dr. Young's and I cannot cut it out I copy it here.
We could not go to Sunday School this morning, it rained from
daylight to nine or ten o'clock, it was quite a
Miss Mary had another chill this morning, she was perfectly discouraged, had not any control over her feelings but exclaimed that she should die if she remained here during the summer, she had a slight dumb chill day before yesterday, and was imprudent in leaving her bed this morning, she has almost recovered from the effects of the chill now and is talking and laughing in the other room, though she is still in bed. Rose is much better, has sat up for some time today.
Sylvia had a child born yesterday, a boy.
It is quite warm today in spite of the rain. I do not think it can have cleared off yet.
I think I am passing, I might say have passed, through an ordeal lately, the ordeal of selfdenial in the greatest of luxuries to me, This is occasional privacy and quiet. I used to think when we first came here that it would be almost impossible for me to live as we have lived in constant society with one another and almost constant noise.
I hope I do not speak presumptuously or inclined to murmur, it
has been a great blessing to me in teaching me self-control in little
things, self-control in great things I learned before, but have never
been sufficiently watchful over the “little foxes”; yet let me not exult
before the day of trial is passed, let me bear in mind the apostolic
injunction “Be not highminded but fear”, to be constantly fearful of
sin is the only way to guard against it.
The days have passed in their usual routine all the week. Father left us for Vicksburg Monday but returned Wednesday night. Miss Mary has had two chills this week, one Tuesday and one yesterday, she is very weak today, looked almost as badly as she did after her first attack. We have had very cool weather this week, yesterday was a delightful day, Father and I went to Monroe yesterday. Miss Puss and Miss Hannah Bry went with us, we went in to attend the meeting of the Monroe society, we went to Mrs. Roane's and asked her to accompany us and then repaired to the meeting, where we remained until one o'clock, we then returned to Mrs. Roane's and spent the rest of the day there, we did not come home until after the cars arrived, so that we had a moonlight ride, the day was very pleasant indeed.
Mr. Robt. Green and his company leave for Virginia today, The employees of the Southern road presented Mr. Green with a very handsome sword before he left.
Father is at home today, he is having the sills of the house placed, the house will occupy much more room than I at first thought, it takes up almost the whole of our little hill.
So quietly do the days pass that the record of one may almost suffice for that of another. Father left, for Vicksburg Monday, we expect him back tonight.
We have all been picking lint this week, and have filled two good-sized boxes; Miss Mary and I went over to Mrs. Parks' Monday evening, learned how to card, it is very hard work and my hands are nearly blistered, and my arm quite lame.
Mrs. Marks spent the day with us yesterday, and we all worked together, Miss Mary and I tied up our heads, but Mrs. Marks did not, and her hair is full of lint; it flies about so, all over the floor and our dresses.
Misses Puss and Hannah Bry were up to see us Monday evening, they are very pleasant indeed.
The weather has been rainy or cloudy all the week, yesterday it was quite warm.
We have heard of victories won by our soldiers in Western Virginia, Missouri and Texas. It is reported, and believed, that at Leesburg three hundred Federalists were killed and the rest (one thousand five hundred) taken prisoners; in Missouri Gen'l Lyon is killed and Siegel reported wounded. I hope all these good reports are true, it is almost incredible that at Leesburg only six of our men were killed and nine wounded.
I forgot to mention that Father called upon Miss Stewart while in
Vicksburg, she is forty or fifty years old, rubs snuff and pets a lap
dog, the first is no objection but the last two are. Besides this, she
never stays in one place longer than six months, this last would deter
Mr. Barron has
Willie, Miss Mary, and Rose have all been sick since Sunday, Willie was taken with a chill Sunday, but has not had any since, he is walking about today, but looks badly.
Miss Mary has been very sick, she too had a chill Sunday, and
another Monday. She is very very weak, and her face, hands and whole
body are painfully thin. Mother sent for Dr. Whyte yesterday morning,
he prescribed the invariable calomel and quinine, she is somewhat
better this morning, but is utterly prostrated, she will never get
well until she has a change of air and scene. I think this attack was
brought on by exposure, Friday afternoon she went out to ride on horseback
with three or four girls and boys, it was very damp, but the girls
came for her, and she wanted to go so much that Mother could not refuse
her; it was the first ride she had taken this year and she went four
or five miles, then she came home she had a boisterous dance until
dark. Then again Saturday evening we took tea at Mrs. Noble's with a
party of girls and boys, and after playing in the yard for some time,
came home after dark, it was not raining but was cloudy; and the damp
air, together with such an unusual amount of violent exercise was too
much for Miss Mary in her weak state.
Rose has had an attack of common chills, she has missed the chills today and will probably be up this evening.
Father left for Vicksburg Monday afternoon. we expect him back tonight.
Rain, rain, I sometimes think it will never stop, it rained all
last week, we had a short respite Sunday morning but the rain commenced
in the evening and continued steadily all night, Monday morning it
“held up” for a few hours and we hoped it would clear off but it commenced
again and rained all night. Yesterday was a regular rainy day,
no cessation, and the air was raw and chilly, last night a continuous
dropping, this morning after breakfast we hailed the bright sunshine
with delight but a brisk shower quenched our hopes, now the sun has
come out again, and as it seemed to be growing brighter I think it may
clear up. Our house leaks all over, in some places the floor is beginning
to mildew! every thing is damp, and the mould is constantly accumulating
on books and boxes, every night this week I have been awaked
by the rain dropping on my pillow and have laid down again with a wash
basin at my head to catch the water. Father took a great deal of trouble
to get cypress boards so as to have the roof tight, but they were too
thin and have all split.
Mother and I sewed for the soldiers yesterday, we made three flannel shirts, with Emmeline's help in the evening.
Mother and I are knitting woolen socks for the soldiers, Mother
has begun her second pair, but I have not finished my first one yet,
it is the second sock I ever knit.
The three
Since I wrote last Miss Mary has entirely recovered from her
attack. Willie had another chill Wednesday night and a fever last
night, he is up today, but looks rather like an invalid. Our society
Monday, Mrs. Noble, Mother and I went up to the meeting of the
society at Zion Hill six miles from here, but they had changed the day
of meeting and we went up to Mrs. Bennett's house, we had never seen
her before, but her daughter, Miss Newcomb, is the secretary of the
society, and Mrs. Noble had been invited there, they received us very
cordially; Mrs. Bennett is from the vicinity of Milledgeville, she
and Mother had many acquaintances in common. The Bennetts have been here
twelve years.
Miss Newcomb is a very nice young lady, she showed me her scrap
book, herbarium, and many other little treasures. Mother spent the day
with Mrs. Bry Tuesday. Wednesday she and Mrs. Cauthorn went into Monroe.
Father left for Vicksburg yesterday; we expect him back tonight. Yesterday evening Carrie Young invited me to go to ride with her we went in her buggy.
We have had warm weather lately, it has not rained this week.
I cannot help feeling sad this evening, Oh when we think what may be before us, how can any of us be aught but sad. Father, Mother and Major Bry have just walked over to Dr. Young's who returned from Virginia Thursday night.
Dr. Young is in high spirits and expects that we will be victorious and that soon; but oh if we are, how many many bleeding hearts will that victory cost! I sicken at the thought.
Father and Major Bry think that the war will continue through
can I bear it? but why speak thus, I know
I must bear it, and it only rests with me to decide whether I shall
bear cheerfully or repiningly. I hope I may be enabled to be cheerful,
and I sometimes think I can be so, but there are moments of darkness,
in which I cannot think of the brightness which is often hid by clouds,
and waits but for the stormy wind to scatter them and make its glory
apparent. Oh, that I might have grace given me to wait on the Lord's
good pleasure, I am too impatient, and I sometimes fear that God has
wholly withdrawn his countenance from me, else I should not so rebel
against his chastisements.
I think too much of my sorrows and too little of my blessings, truly God has been very kind to me, and though he has sent trials to me, yet how do I know but that if it had not been for them I should never have tested the sweetness of God's mercy.
Father has been sick since I wrote last, he was caught in the rain
last Friday night, and took a chill, he was quite sick, but was able
to leave for Vicksburg on Thursday, he returned last night. Father was
unfortunate on his journey home at one of the stations he met with a
very bad man, who opened a conversation with him about some cattle
which had been killed on the road, and for which Father had refused to
pay an exorbitant price, after speaking a few words Father walked off,
where upon the man followed and used exceedingly abusive language to him,
Little Jim is now quite sick, we called in Doctor Whyte Friday, he said that if had been suffered to run on it would have terminated in Typhoid fever.
Miss Mary, Eva, and I passed the day at Mrs. Bry's yesterday, in the evening we went to Monroe for Father.
I have been very busy this week, have knit a pair of socks. How many more will I knit before the war closes? I am afraid I shall have time to get accustomed to it before I cease, my hand is now quite lame from constant knitting.
Father and Miss Mary and both sick again, Father went to bed Thursday
and has not been up since, he insisted at first that all he needed
was rest and would not let Mother send for the doctor, but yesterday
he consented, and Mother sent; Dr. Whyte says that Father has only
a slow fever, but that he has needed medicine for some time; he left
calomel and quinine. Father is very weak, but feels a little better
this evening.
Miss Mary had a slight chill this morning, and has had fever ever since, as usual she is exceedingly nervous and very much discouraged. Little Jim has been up for two or three days, he is now quite well.
Miss Mary and I spent Monday at Mrs. Noble's, we were invited there
to meet Mrs. Richardson (Mrs. Noble's niece) and her children. She is
a very pleasant lady, and we enjoyed the day. Yesterday Misses Puss and
Hannah Bry and Carrie Young spent the day with us, I should have enjoyed
This morning it cleared off cool, the air is rather damp, and it has seemed like a real Autumn day, we must expect many such days now, Autumn is really here, many of the leaves are turning and some of the black gum trees are almost bare.
Mrs. Noble has resigned her position as President of the society, and last Wednesday Mother was elected in her stead.
I have neglected my journal very much lately, not because I did not wish to write, but because I have not felt justified in taking the time. I have been so busy knitting and sewing that I have not had a moment to spare; the week and months pass before I am aware, and yet, when I look back it seems a long and weary time, the events of last month seem to have taken place almost a year ago.
I have not written one very important thing, Uncle Dole has a baby,
a little girl, she is seven weeks old; Aunt Satira thinks her beautiful.
Aunt Mary writes that she and Grandma are knitting for the soldiers. I
received a letter from Miss Valeria night before last, they have all
had chills, sometimes four or five in bed at once; John and Angus have
gone to a military school in Nashville, Tenn.
I have been so busy that I have not had time to mention in my
journal the burning of Mr. Water's house at Amite by some companies of
the Polish Brigade which were encamped there, the soldiers had annoyed
Mr. Waters very much by stealing his fruit and breaking his
trees, notwithstanding he freely gave to them when asked; at last he threatened
to shoot them, and finding them in his field one day, he shot at two of
Miss Valeria says that the people of Amite were in terror lest they should burn the town before they left, there was one company, the Gross Tete Guards, which guarded the town several nights. This is a dreadful tale too tell of our own soldiers, there is but one consolation and this is that they are not our own countrymen, they are, most of them, the low, foreign population of New Orleans. Our country soldiers are many of them accomplished gentlemen, and all are men of humanity and honesty.
The night is coming on, in darkness and gloom, the sky is grey,
and cold, and the north wind sounds drearily, this is one of “the
melancholy days, the saddest of the year”, our indoor scene is not one
to raise the spirits, and when we seek refuge in thought we but increase
the gloom. I would not allow weather or privations to sadden me, but I
can scarce bear up against sadness when I seen Father and Mother so
depressed, Father is so sad. We must try and remember that “though
sorrow may endure for a night, joy cometh in the morning”.
Oh it is cold very cold for September, last night the wind
whistled round the house like winter. Pa is having a clay chimney
built today. We are going to have a fire in it tonight, it will be
so delightful, this morning we all went to breakfast wrapped up in
blankets, Father has been wearing a blanket in the form of a poncho
all day. Yesterday we all went
We came home before sunset, a long time, but as we carried every
body home we did not arrive such before dark; we had two flags in the
wagon, and hurrahed at every house we passed, some of the people thought
we were soldiers and came way out to the road to see.
Mother and Father went to Monroe yesterday and took Georgie with them. Miss Mary had a chill Monday; and Willie had one Tuesday. Father is improving, but very slowly.
Mrs. Batchelor spent the day with us Tuesday, she is a lady teacher
who is spending her vacation near here, Mother went to see her the other
The sun is near
I have waited until the seventh day of the month has almost past to write in my journal. The past week has been a busy one to me. Almost every day I went visiting. Tuesday Mrs. Cauthorn and Miss Puss Bry spent the day with us, Wednesday our society met, and I spent the morning at the Church, Thursday I spent at Major Bry's. Friday I went up to the meeting of the Summerfield society, I went on horseback with Capt. Marks and Miss Phoebe Friend, and enjoyed myself very much, Saturday I went to walk with the Misses Bry, started right after dinner and did not get home until nearly dark; besides all this I have scalloped two flannel skirts, knit half a sock for John and written one whole morning, and I have been labouring under a severe cold nearly all the time.
This morning I have been very busy compiling society reports, a work of considerable labour since all the donations with their donors must be put down, and to omit a single pair of socks is a great negligence. I went over my minutes five or six times to see that nothing had been left out and then compared tables and amounts until I was heartily tired; but it is all done now, and I can feel a little better contented, this reason of all this trouble is that our society has separated from the one at Monroe, and I wished to make out a report of every thing we had done.
Father has been improving slowly since I wrote last, he is still weak, he went to Vicksburg Wednesday and was very much fatigued when he returned home, he and Mother have gone to Monroe today.
Mrs. Batchelor has taken the Academy in Monroe, so that hope is past; we have written to two other teachers.
A great calamity befel Uncle Moses the other day, on last Wednesday the temporary scaffolding around his bridge fell down and killed one of his workmen, besides wounding one or two.
The weather is quite cool now, we had some very warm days last week, but it rained last night and is momentarily getting colder.
We go on another great
We took our very uneasy about them, and thought they were lost in the woods.
The Brys moved to Monroe yesterday, we were sorry to lose their company—are going to move down to their house Monday.
Mother was threatened with a raised breast day before yesterday, she took a violent cold, and increased it by going to the society, she is up today, Miss Mary had a chill Wednesday, another Thursday and another yesterday, she missed it today and has been up all the afternoon.
Miss Newcomb and her sister Miss Bennett spent the day with us Wednesday,
I was very glad to see them, Miss Bennett is pleasant, but I
The weather is very pleasant now, cool and clear, this morning it was very cold, but it is warmer now.
We have moved; our fifth move since leaving Georgia has been completed we shall have to make one more, and I hope that will prove the last. We commenced moving Monday, and all slept here last night. I came down early yesterday morning and remained all day, putting things in order as they were brought down, it was a dull, leaden day, and about dusk it commenced to rain, there had been no time to bring a load of wood, and when the night came on, cold and damp we had only a few sticks to make a blaze in the chimney, still the neat blue carpet on the floor, the white beds, mahogany stand and rocking chairs drawn close to the fire-place made a homelike picture as seen by the mild light of the Kerosene lamp. I was tired and Mother was nearly sick with the colic, we had to sit for Father and Miss Mary who had gone to Vicksburg. The heavy rain pouring down on the roof was no pleasant reminder of their cold ride home, and although I read aloud from the fascinating Conquest of Peru the hours wore away heavily till the rumbling of the carriage wheels announced their coming. They were both wet, having crossed the ferry in the rain, and our little fire was not a sufficiency for them, however, we soon went to bed, and I at least, forgot my cares (?) in sound refreshing sleep.
When I rose this morning my limbs were very stiff but this soon
wore off. I have spent a very quiet day, unpacking and arranging my
writing materials, looking over my papers to select a piece for Miss
Puss Bry's Album, writing letters, and writing my journal; besides
Father is President and Superintendant of the railroad, I suppose
it was necessary he should be, but if it could have been avoided it
would have been a great pleasure to me, now he will have to be away
from home a great deal. I am sorry too on Dr. Young's account, it deprives
him of his situation.
I went to Church Sunday at Chapel Hill.
When I wrote last I forgot to say that we have had quite a naval
victory on the Mississippi; last Saturday commodore Hollins made an
attack on the
Father, Mother and I went into Monroe Thursday, Georgie went with
us, he had his hair cut off, I could not bear the idea of having it
cut, but he did look very cunning after it was done, he looks so much
like Willie now, he is delighted with the idea of having his hair cut
like Father's thinks himself entirely above wearing frocks any longer.
We went to the sewing society, to Mrs. Roane's Mrs. Bry's
and to Mrs. Steven's to dine. While we were waiting on the steps of the society
We found Major Bry's family very well, all were at home except Miss Hannah, who was at Cottonport with Mrs. Cauthorn.
Aunt June was quite well. I think Miss Mary Stevens, Mrs. Steven's
On our way home, we stopped at Mrs. Maguire's she is Judge Lemie's sister, a very pleasant lady, has been living at her present residence forty years! this of itself is enough to render her interesting in this country where almost every one has recently moved here.
We have had very disagreeable weather, it commenced raining Thursday night, and has been either raining or misting ever since. The sun came out this afternoon, and it seems to have settled into cold weather.
Father has come from Monroe.
Father left home a week ago last Monday for New Orleans, we have missed him very much indeed. This past week has been a very busy one, with us, Mother has been making two or three winter dresses and altering some old ones, I made a dress for myself this week, it is only the second one I ever made. I have been very busy sewing every day and this morning I worked too, this evening I have been writing some letters.
Mother is weaning John, poor little fellow, he does not cry much,
but looks so pale and pitiful, he is fonder of Mother than he was when
This evening a man, his wife and child came here to know if they could stay tonight, they had moved from Mississippi and came out from Monroe in a hack, they had applied at several places for a night's lodging, and had been refused, Mother could not turn them off, she told them they could stay until Monday.
Last week we had delightful weather, neither very warm nor cold, the last day or two it has been really cold, this morning there was a heavy frost on the ground.
Poor Willie had a chill last night, he has been up all day today, but looks badly.
Father returned home last Tuesday night, and left for New Orleans again this morning, he went to Monroe every day last week, except one, so that we had no pleasure of his society, in this way we must expect to spend the winter.
Willie had a chill last night, he is almost discouraged, and no wonder, he has been having chills now since last summer.
John has been quite sick, he still looks as white and fragile as a lily, but his eyes are very black, and shoot glances of fire at any one who crosses him, he will not be petted by any one but Mother, I scarce dare to speak to him or look at him.
We all went to Church, yesterday, morning, heard a very excellent
sermon, though not a polished one, one comparison struck me as particularly
just and original, in illustrating the Providence of God the
minister said “God's Providence may to likened, to a very long chain,
which stretches from the creation of Adam to the end of time, to make
Mr. Pierce came over to see us in the afternoon, he says he has
not had a chill in more than two weeks, Willie prophesied that he
would have one soon. The weather is very warm, while I write I am in
a perspiration, and this on the tenth of November, the warm breezes
are sending thousands of dead and dying leaves to the ground, and it
seems strange to look out on the brown woods, a few days ago clad in
gold color and crimson, and now so changed, but one thing remains steadfast,
the unchanging pine still rears
Aunt Jane and Miss Mary Stephens spent the day with us Saturday, I was glad to see them.
I have been busy writing all day, and feel quite tired, but must write a few lines in my journal.
Eva and I are quite alone this evening, Mother has gone to Mrs. Axley's and the children are out gathering hickory nuts. Eva is almost sick with a cold. Misses Joe and Phoebe Friend spent the afternoon with us yesterday, Carrie Young and Mrs. Cloud also called.
I received a letter from Miss Valeria. yesterday, she says Angus
has been very sick since leaving home.—It is still very warm.
This is the fast day appointed by our President to pray for a continuance of those blessings which God has thus far bestowed upon us. I could not go to Church this morning as the Church where meeting was held today is four or five miles distant, and Willie could not spare the mules for us to go. I have not eaten any meat or butter, however, and having been reading newspapers and knitting socks all day. Truly we have reason to fast and pray, for war now encompasses us on every side, and though God has thus far enabled us to ward off our enemies, yet we have much more to do ere we establish our independence.
On the 7th there was an attack made on our troops opposite
Columbus, Ken. our force stationed there was very small, and being
overwhelmed by superior numbers retired to the river bank and awaited
reinforcements, these soon came, and charging the enemy forced them
to fly in confusion to their transports, we gained a complete victory,
although their numbers were superior to ours.
A part of the great northern fleet attacked the South Carolina coast on the 10th and took two of our batteries, they also gained possession of the small town of Beaufort and were expected to attack Savannah, but a large body of troops were ordered out to guard the city, and the railroad guns were mounted, and vessels sunk in the channels and it is thought that, should they attempt a landing they could not fail of being repulsed.
East Tennessee is reported to be in an insurrectionary state, several railroad bridges have been burned, and the country said to be in a state of great excitement.
The officers and crew of the privateer Savannah have been tried and found guilty of piracy, President Davis will fulfill his threat of retaliation, and the prisoners in our hands have drawn lots, if our privateers are hung; Col. Corcoran of the United States army, two Capts. and ten Lieutenants will suffer the same ignominious death; is it not horrible! every day increases my abhorrence of Lincoln and his parasites.
Fremont is withdrawn from the command of the western department, and Hunter appointed, great dissatisfaction is felt in the west, and it is said that threats are made of appointing Fremont military dictator of the West, a military dictator in the United States! a military dictator to rule over the race which produced a Washington! they are unworthy of the heritage of this name, his hallowed birthplace owns not their rule, henceforth Washington, the Father of our country, his memory, his virtue, his valor, they remain the heritage alone of his native state, and the fair sisters that with her form our youthful Confederacy.
Gen'l. Scott has resigned, but with what different feelings do we
hear it than we did five months since, when every heart beat high with
exaltation and every eye glanced proud welcome to the old soldier,
faithful to his native land, when every Virginian as they met, each
shook hands over the tidings, and every Church bell rang out a glad
welcome, but we were mistaken, he was a traitor, and he is now fallen—
below our indignation we look upon him with pitying, contempt, in all
his pride of Generalship he has succeeded in wounding only himself, and
as he has been able to do us no harm, so his resignation can do us no
good. He has been careful in the terms of his with-drawal from active
service to proclaim still a friend to his country's foes, and as such
Father came home last night, he is quite well. He brought a letter
from Mrs. Aucorn, a lady teacher in New Orleans, who applied to Mother
for a situation several weeks ago, she wrote stating the branches she
teaches so candidly and her situation too, that Mother and Father concluded
to take her. She is married and has two children, but her husband
is in the army, and his pay is insufficient for their support. I am glad
we have at last engaged a teacher, I feel that after the desultory life
I have been leading lately, it will be hard for me to settle down, to
my studies, but I feel that I am ignorant and I really want to learn,
then too the other children must have a teacher, Miss Mary and Eva are
fast growing up, and they scarcely know the elements of education.
The weather today is cool and cloudy, a dense fog settled last night before dark, and is just now clearing away.
Father has just left for Monroe.
My seventeenth birthday; I cannot but think of my last birthday and the retrospection makes me sad, how many changes have taken place since then, how short the time seems, and yet in that short time our infant Confederacy has sprung up, where are now the enemies who boasted that we should be hushed into quietness as easily as the Mother hushes a fretful babe! there is much, very much to be thankful for, why does my heart ever cry more?
But my birthday has been very pleasant, and enlivened by an unexpected
visitor, yesterday morning Lory came it and said that there
was a buggy coming with a lady in black, and a negro man in it, we
possibly take her, show her the way over to Mr. Adams' ” so saying
Mother hurried out upon the piazza, but what was her horror to see
the buggy driving off and the lady traveller walking up to the house.
“What could Emmeline mean by letting the buggy go off, who knows who
she might be,” but when the lady arrived about half way up to the
house I heard Mother exclaim “isn't that Mrs. Horne”, and, sure enough
it was, we were very glad to see her; she and Mr. Horne had just come
to Vicksburg to attend to some business and are going back to Georgia
to spend the winter.
Major Bry spent the day with us Sunday, and Mrs. Bry and Misses Puss and Hannah came over in the afternoon.
Captain Smith, one of the directors in the railroad came down Sunday night, he went away, this morning, Father has been trying again to buy Mrs. Richardson's place, he wrote up to Capt. Smith to try and buy it for him, but he could not succeed, he is now going to try and buy five or six acres to put the house on, it is not framed yet, and Father wants to move it over on the place we first selected, that is, if he can buy enough land to put kitchen and outhouses upon. The weather is quite pleasant now, it rained last night, and has been a little cloudy today.
Mrs. Marks is spending, the day with us, in honour of my birthday. Father and Mr. Horne went into town today.
Mr. and Mrs. Horne left us Wednesday, Father and Mother went into
town with them, I spent the day at Mrs. Friend's Wednesday and enjoyed
it very well. I had sent word that I was going but the boy did not
carry the message and they were not expecting me, they thought it was
one of the children knocking and bade me come in very carelessly. I was
very much surprised at this but entered accordingly. Misses Nancy Neal
Joe, and Phoebe Friend were sitting around a quilting frame, their
tongues keeping time to the motion of their needles, all except Miss
Nancy destitute of the expansive
Mr. and Mrs. Friend soon entered, and inquiries about the health of our respective families having been exchanged, I was asked if I know how to quilt. I was obliged to confess my total ignorance of that female accomplishment, at the same professing my desire to learn. I was invited to take a seat at the quilting frame and immediately found to my great satisfaction that my quilting was unequaled in smallness of stitches, and the accuracy of the lines by any of my companions, though I must in candor say that while I was quilting one shell they had finished three! I always like novelty, and was very much pleased with my new accomplishment.
In the afternoon we walked over to see Miss Applewhite, who—with
her Mother, Mrs. Simmons, lives very near the Friends. I found them at
home and was soon on easy terms with Mrs. Simmons, whom I have met once
or twice at the Society. She is a very neat, pleasant lady, and her
daughter a modest, pre-possessing girl. Mrs. Simmons was carding cotton
rolls; my experience about carding lint had been very favourable, and
Father left us for New Orleans Thursday, he will bring Mrs. Aucoin back with him, that is, God willing.
Willie had a chill Thursday, it was very slight however. Today is very pleasant, considerably colder than it has been for several days.—
Mother and I went over to Mrs. Drake's Thursday. Mrs. Anding was over here this morning. Mr. Jones came down Thursday, took Dave home with him.
I am reading “Woodstock” aloud, and Miss Mary is here begging me to go and read it to her, so I must not write any longer.—
Father returned last night but did not bring Mrs. Aucoin with him,
one of her children was taken very sick and of course she could not
leave it, she wrote saying that she thought perhaps
While Father was in the city he went to see a Miss Hokerno, a
jewess, who once taught in Major Bry's family, she is an excellent
teacher, but her salary is one thousand dollars. Wednesday was society
day, we went, but there were but ten members present. Mother and I spent
Thursday with Mrs. Marks.
Mr. Pierce spent Sunday with us. Mother, Miss Mary, Willie and John expect to leave for Amite Monday.
This evening we had a very hard rain, but not of very long duration, it is still cloudy.
Miss Mary, Eva, Lory and I went up to Mrs. Britt's yesterday afternoon
to got some yarn which her daughters were spinning for Mother,
it is about a mile and a half from here and the road is through the
woods all the way nearly; just after we left the public road and were
walking in a little path through the woods we saw a large black snake
lying before us, just
Father has received a letter from Captain Smith, Mrs. Richardson will not sell us the land.
They have all gone, they left just after dinner, poor little Georgie,
pe corns” in it.
Even Father has gone, he was obliged to go to DeSoto one day this week and thought he had better go with Mother, so the children and I will be all alone tonight. How much I shall miss them! two whole weeks! but I shall have so much to think of that the time will pass more quickly.
One week has passed since Mother left, and though each day has gone so quickly that I was not able to finish all I wished, yet it seems a long time since she went.
Father has been raising the house for a week past, and I have
been up to the place
Then Sunday morning, Father was very much fatigued and after Miss
Puss left he lay down on the couch and took a good nap. I brought Lory
and George in the parlour and was amusing them by showing them some
pictures, Eva was looking out of the window,—and she interrupted us
by saying “who is that?” at the same time I heard a man's step in the
hall, I did not rise, thinking that it was Mr. Pierce, but Eva, who
had gone to the door, startled me by exclaiming “Captain! no, Mr”—
but before she had added the name I was at the door when to my perfect
no dinner”, notwithstanding
that I had the rare luxury of Chicken for dinner I could not help
being very anxious lest everything should not be nice, well! I sat down
at the head of the table, and could not help smiling as I did so,
though I have occupied the place of mistress of the house too often to
feel much embarrassed in my position. I was helped to chicken, and it
seemed to me that it was very insipid, I was afraid that Alice had
made a mistake and my company would not relish their dinner. I knew
that Mr. Pierce seldom eats more than sufficient for a bird to live on,
so I turned my attention to Mr. John Green and while I listened or replied
to some remark my eyes were more interested in observing the contents
of his plate than in marking the lineaments of his face; but I
had no cause for apprehension on this score, as he helped himself to
gravy and rice he observed “Miss Sarah, camp life has not taken away
my appetite”. I might have answered that I perceived it had not, and
The Battalion to which the Blues and the Madison infantry belong is now in Richmond forming into a regiment, it is reported here that they have gone into winter quarters.
Mrs. Marks leaves for Georgia Thursday, I am sorry she is going, she is an excellent neighbor; Father will accompany her as far as Canton so I shall have to spend two more nights alone.
We received a letter from Mother last night, Willie has not had but one chill since he left, Mother says he is enjoying himself, I do hope this trip will improve him.
The weather is delightful, has been ever since Mother left, last Wednesday we had a slight rain, and it turned very cold, it is warmer now.
Father went to bed an hour ago, and I should have been asleep ere this but my multifarious duties leave me no time for writing in the day, and thought I could not let my journal go any longer.
I have neglected to write in my journal for some time, but on the last day of the old year I feel that I must write.
Mother, Miss Mary, and John returned home Friday night, the 20th;
a little more than a week ago, Willie did not return until Sunday night,
he has only had one chill since he came home, and that was on the same
Mrs. Brantley and her son Green came down here a week ago Sunday (22nd), the old lady came to see Father on business.
We had a very pleasant Christmas; the day after Christmas day, Miss Mary and I fixed up a little pine tree as a Christmas tree, we had no costly gifts, but a few sugar plums in lace bags, and some home made Cornucopias with two or three little wax candles made the tree very attractive to the children. Father had a few fire works too which he had forgot to bring home Christmas eve, and we were delighted looking at them.
The negroes had a supper and dance up at the place and we all walked up to see them, Father was very much pleased to see them dance, and as their house was small and smoky so that we could not look on with any pleasure, Father had our long room cleared out and had them go in there and dance. We stayed looking at them till nine o'clock, and then walked home again.
Mr. Pierce took all his meals here after Christmas, until Sunday when he went back to the mill again.
Mother received a letter from Aunt Mary last week saying that she thought something of coming out this winter.
Aunt Jane has a little daughter born on the 16th of the month.
Mother, Eva, and I went into Monroe yesterday, called at Mrs. Steven's, Mrs. Noble's and Mrs. Roane's and dined at Major Bry's passed a very pleasant day. Aunt Jane looks very well, talks about the baby very naturally.
Father left for Vicksburg yesterday. Mrs. Marks left for Georgia
the on the 19th. George has been quite sick with a cold, is getting better
Old Mrs. Adams and Mrs. Temple are here, I must really go in the parlour, it is the first time Mrs. Adams has ever been here.
We are having delightful weather now, we had a hard rain Friday night, and another Saturday, but Sunday it cleared off cool and pleasant.
Last week Miss Mary and I planted some Jasmine vines up at the place, they seem to be growing well, we look forward with pleasure to the Spring when our labour will be rewarded by their fragrant yellow blossoms. The house progresses slowly, it is now nearly all raised, and begins to look something like a house, Father has two negro carpenters to help Mr. Axley.
Friday night I had a most pleasant surprise. Father came home and said that Eldridge had a paper box on the waggon—marked for me. Of course we were all very curious to know who it could be from, and what could be in it. Uncle Jim was sent up to Mr. Axley's to wait till the waggon came, and soon returned with it. When it was opened there lay a very pretty chair made of velvet, ornamented with ribbon and straw and the seat of which, being raised, showed a space nicely lined with flannel, it was a fancy jewelry box from Miss Valeria, she had it made for a Christmas present, and thought it might reach me by Christmas Eve, the taste and beauty of the chair would alone have rendered it acceptable, even had it not been a souvenir of affection from one whose affection I prize so highly, and made too by her own hands.
Father left for New Orleans yesterday, we expect him back Saturday night.
Miss Mary, Lory and I have been very busy this week up at “the place”,
Mother received a letter from Mrs. Dwight (the last teacher we wrote to) accepting the situation and saying that she would leave New Orleans on Tuesday, she must have arrived at Monroe last night, Mother has sent in to see if she is there.
It is with mingled feelings that I see the
At length I am able to write “the teacher has come” and more than
this, I can say that I like her very much. She came Saturday night with
Father, and Monday she commenced teaching, but we have not yet settled
into the regular routine of school, as our books have not come, and
other things have prevented our being regular. Miss Mary and I are
Mrs. Dwight is very tall, but well proportioned, with dark skin,
dark eyes, and black hair, she speaks English perfectly correctly but
with a slight accent, which at first makes her voice seem rather affected,
she is very lady like, very cheerful, and has a good education, built
upon the solid foundation of good sense and real literary taste.
Besides French I study Ancient Geography, Mythology, Rhetoric, Astronomy and am to take philosophy, physiology and arithmetic when the books come.
Sunday was a very warm day, but at night it became very cold, all
day Monday it was cold and gray, snowed some about dusk, Tuesday colder
and still gray, but this morning about eleven o'clock the sun shone
out, and it has been getting warmer all day.
Monday morning we came in here for school, but it was so cold, and the change was so sudden that poor Miss Mary took a chill, it was slight, however, and went off, so that she could say her french lesson in the evening, but this morning she had another one before breakfast, it continued for nearly two hours, and she has been in bed all day, she is quite weak.
We have had a visitor nearly every day this week. Sunday Mr. Pierce,
as usual, spent the day with us. Monday Mrs. Mason and Miss Puss Bry
spent an hour or two with us in the morning. Mrs. Mason brought me a
This morning Major Bry came in and dined with us. Before we had finished dinner Mrs. Craig and Miss Pamela Collins came in, Miss Pamela brought some money which she had had subscribed for the Society.
I received a letter from Aunt Mary tonight, they hope to start
from Georgia by the
Willie has his hands at work clearing up the yard up at the place. I have not been up there since Sunday, I have been so busy studying that I have not had time. I should not have been able to write so long a “journal” this time, had it not been that I am sitting in the room with Miss Mary tonight, and have thus a very good opportunity of writing.
Just two weeks since Mrs. Dwight came, the time has been in studying hard all day except a short time for a walk. I feel happy now it seems as if I was doing right.
Miss Mary is quite well again, is taking medicine though, to prevent any more chills. We expect Uncle David and family tonight, they were in Jackson yesterday, Father has gone in with the carriage. I am full of pleasurable anticipations. Weather delightful, cool but not freezing, the roads are good too, and it is Saturday night, just the right time for company to come, I have had time to get all my things in order. Miss Phillips and Carrie Young spent an hour or two with us this morning.
A week since I wrote, and now only to record a most astonishing
event, Mr. Green spent the day with us, Mr. Robert Green; this morning
Mother, Aunt Mary and I were sitting talking together when one of the
I have been so busy enjoying myself for the past week that I have had no time for writing. Uncle David, Aunt Mary, Grandma and Hun and Kitty arrived last Saturday night, there has been no school this week, it has been so long since we have seen any of them that we could not do anything but enjoy their presence. The children have been in a perfect glee, have made noise enough to deafen me.
Willie has had the chills again this week, I feel so sorry for him.
Since Aunt Mary left my time has been so fully occupied that I have not had time to record their departure, they left a week ago last Wednesday. I was very sorry indeed to have them go, Father, Mother, and Eva went to Vicksburg with them, and it seemed very lonely; but we immediately commenced school again, and constant employment filling up my mind as well as time soon dispels loneliness.
We had had rainy weather nearly all the time Aunt Mary was here,
and it only cleared off last week, Friday we had a snow, woke up Saturday
morning and found the ground covered, but not so deep as to prevent
roots and bushes showing, some rain had fallen on the snow, and,
freezing, had made an icy coat, so that the snow was very slippery.
Many a fall was gotten during the day, we all walked up to the place
in the morning. I fell down just a few steps from the door but sent for
Today the snow is melting, it is nearly all off the ground, but the housetops still look white, though it has been dropping from the eaves in a continuous stream since ten o'clock this morning.
Mr. John Green is to be married the 20th of this month; he wrote Father word, but did not say to whom.
Mr. Pierce spent the day here today.
Our house is progressing more rapidly now, it is nearly shingled and Uncle Tom is at work on a chimney, it begins to look as if it might be finished sufficiently for us to go in it by May.
Bad news from the war comes in upon us now, for the last week we
have heard of continual successes of the federalists; they have advanced
up the Tennessee river as far as Alabama; into North Carolina, and are
preparing to attack as at Savannah and in Missouri, we are menaced on
every side, but from what the later papers say, our troops are rallying
to the threatened points, and ready to meet the invader. I hope and
pray that they may drive back the vandal horde.
As yet we have heard of nothing but reverses, Fort Donnelson was
taken by the 17th last month, since that Nashville has been surrendered
by the civil authorities, and now Columbus is threatened by an army of
100,000 men, rumours are all around, we know nothing certainly except
that the Yankees are advancing and our troops retiring, it is hinted
that only enticing the enemy forward, I hope it is so. I cannot be sure
of anything except that I would rather die than see our armies humiliated
by flight, our country ruined by submission; submission! why do
I speak that disgraceful word, why do I think it for a moment; victory,
Friday was a fast day, the first act after President Davis' inauguration as President of the permanent government was to appoint a day of fast and prayer, it was kept very strictly in Monroe, all the stores and other places of business was closed, and the Church was crowded, we fasted here, had no dinner at all, no meat for breakfast, school was also suspended. Mother and Grandma went into Monroe to attend Church, Grandma remained with Aunt Jane.
We received Mr. John Green's wedding card today, his bride was Miss Skipwith of Mississippi.
We have been having delightful weather for the past week, yesterday, the first day of Spring, was bright and warm. I walked down to the bayou and gather some sassafras and haw flowers, the little violets are beginning to peep out in all directions, peach buds are about to burst, and nature all around prepares to burst her fetters.
This morning we were waked up by a severe hailstorm, it was of slight
duration, and was succeeded by rain, it cleared off before dinner, and
now the wind, whistling round the corners, the fires upon the hearths
and the sounds of the axe at the retard its progress. Among all the sad news we hear lately there is one
thing which has not yet suffered reverse, this is the wonderful little
Sumter, the exploits of the gallant Captain Semnes still call forth our
admiration. Lincoln's large, staunch war vessels cannot succeed in capturing
the leaky little craft or prevent her destroying their laden
We still hear bad news, or at least we have heard of no decisive victory, there in a report that Gen'l. Price has defeated the Yankees in Arkansas, but everything about it is vague; one thing we are sure of, our battering ram, the Virginia sunk one of the blockading ships on the Potomac last week, and badly disabled two more, rumours of an approaching battle on the Potomac reach us, Virginia is under martial law, also Memphis and New Orleans; the whole country is excited, and every body astir, Two companies are forming here, to leave in the course of two weeks, Mr. Pierce has joined one of them, a cavalry company, he will go if he can get a horse.
John and Angus Ridgill leave for the war this month, perhaps have left already; John wrote to ask Willie to join them, Willie's health was much better and he concluded to go, and wrote John word that he would, Father was away at that time, but has returned, he thinks of getting an appointment from Government, if he does he says Willie must stay at home, if he does not, he will wish Willie to go. I don't know what to wish, I can't bear the thought of Willie's going away, and yet I am anxious for him to serve his country. I feel sad all the time, my only comfort is in my bible, where we are told that if we continue patient we shall at last be victorious.
When I think what a glorious cause we have or how much less we have suffered than other nations who were still victorious, I feel strengthened, but sometimes we cannot think of all this.
Father left us last Sunday intending to go to New Orleans and
We received a letter from Captain Marks last week telling us what he wished for the company's summer clothing, Mother is trying to get the cloth, we shall soon be very busy. We keep on studying steadily; I do not learn as fast as I wish, but I am too impatient; I do as well as I can expect, the weeks pass away so quickly it seems to me I do so little.
We are sitting up tonight, thinking that perhaps Father may come, and as I am not sleepy I take the opportunity of writing a little.
When Father left, he expected to be gone three or four weeks, but was detained at DeSoto by the high water, the river has been rising for some time, and now threatens to overflow. Father wrote to Mother Friday saying that if he could arrange his business so he would come home and spend Sunday with us, he wrote again yesterday saying he could not leave as the water was over the track in some places, and we must not expect him till he wrote again, but Mother thought perhaps he might come tonight.
We have a very cold windy week, Wednesday night we had a perfect storm of wind and rain, many trees were torn up, and blown down, since that, we have an almost constant cold wind. Grandma spent the week in Monroe; came home today.
Willie had three chills this week, but he is taking Cholagoque again and will have no more I hope.
We have not yet heard any news of importance from the war. Mr. Pierce was here this morning, the company which he joined has broken up, he has not decided yet whether to join the other company which, is made up, or go and join the Blues.
Father returned Wednesday night, but left again this evening, he has just gone. This time I hope he will not be delayed, for I hate to have his absence in anticipation; the river is now at a stand, I hope it will soon fall.
Major Bry and Miss Hannah spent the day with us, there is no news of importance from the war. Mr. Pierce is here this evening.
We have had delightful weather for the past week, everything looks lively and beautiful, nearly all the trees are dressed in tiny young leaves and the dogwood begins to look quite white, though the flowers are none of them fully matured.
Willie has not had a chill since Saturday, if he will only continue his cholagoque he will fully recover.
Angus and John Ridgill have gone to the war.—
Father has been gone two weeks today, and we cannot hope for his
return until next Sunday, the time passes so slowly while he is gone.
I never can bear for him to be away, but I think I feel it now more
than I ever did before. Oh! what a time is this, the past week has
been one of feverish excitement, Tuesday we received news of a great
battle, near Corinth, Miss. Every day since we have been hearing scraps
of news from the battle field, on Wednesday we were triumphant conquerors,
must be victorious; my heart sickens
when I think that under this beautiful blue sky, with God's heavensent
air breathing warm and fructifying around, while the birds sing, and
the green leaves wave as if to praise their Creator, thousands of men
are mingling in mortal combat, and groans and shrieks sounding amid
the roar of artillery and the trampling of cavalry, the picture is too
dreadful; how many Mothers and sisters wives and children sit in despair
or suspense this day. Oh, if there be a retributive justice what
shall be the fate of those wicked men who have sent their myrmidons to
bathe our land in the blood of
Willie has gone to Monroe this morning to get the news, we can scarcely wait for, and yet dread his return. We have not heard from Father since he left, the whole country is in such a state of excitement, and the railroads so thronged with soldiers that the mails cannot be relied upon.
The battle at Corinth was another added to our victories, but the
work is yet but begun,
Gen'l. Johnston was killed at Corinth, every one mourns him. The conscription law has been passed, and thirty days from the time it passed every male between eighteen and thirty-five years, not legally exempt, must be enrolled in defence of our cause. We are waiting anxiously for Father to return, it is three weeks tonight since he left, and we have only heard from him once; two bridges have been burned on the route, and Huntsville, Ala. is in the possession of the Yankees, so that he cannot come by the most direct way; Willie looks for him with much impatience, to decide whether or not he shall go to the war. Willie says he cannot stay at home; though if he applied he could easily get exemption from the conscript law on account of his arm and his ill health.
I hope the latter is getting better he has not had a chill in a long time. This has been quite a cold day, fires have been necessary for comfort, it rains a good deal last week and this morning cleared off cold, it seems as it we shall never have settled warm weather.
This is Easter Sunday, at the commencement of Lent the Yankee papers said that in forty days the stars and stripes should float over New Orleans, their boast has not been verified. God grant I may never see the day that such a thing shall happen!
Miss Mary's and my little violet bushes bore their first flowers this week.
Father returned home last Wednesday night, we were rejoiced to see
him, he had great difficulty in getting home, the roads were so crowded,
he did not enter a passenger car from the time he left Jackson until
he returned, at one time he found the train under the control of a
regiment of South Carolinians, and he went to the
We have just heard such sad news, there are thirteen of the Yankee
gunboats moored at the New Orleans wharf, they have given the city four
days in which to remove foreign property and residents, and women and
children, the four days will be out on Tuesday, and what will happen
then we cannot tell; some say the city will not resist, others that it
will, the forts below the city are still in our possession, they keep
the transports from ascending the river, they say that the gunboats
came three abreast
Gov. Moore is expected at Monroe. Father left this evening, if New Orleans is taken he will not go there, of course. Mother is busy making up Willie's clothes, he expects to leave when Father returns, I sewed on his shirts yesterday, it is melancholy work, my heart sinks when I think of it, but I try to keep brave.
I received a letter from Miss Valeria day before yesterday, Mr.
McNair was killed in the battle of Corinth; also Mr.
If New Orleans is taken the Yankees will probably soon have command
of the river, I cannot bear to think of it. I wrote to Miss Valeria
Father has been away ever since last Sunday, he stayed at De Soto nearly all the week, and then went down the country in search of some government officers with he has business.
The river has risen so high as to cover nearly half the railroad,
with its waters. The last we heard from New Orleans was that the Yankees
had demanded its surrender, and that all the Confederate flags should
be hauled down and the stars and stripes run up instead; Mayor Monroe
said in reply that in compliance with his request Gen. Lovell had withdrawn
his forces from the city as they could not successfully resist
the enemy, that he (the mayor) was no military man, that if he had an
army at his command it would be presumptuous in him to lead it to the
field and that he knew still less how to surrender a city filled with
women and children and unarmed citizens; the city was at their mercy,
but that as to hauling dawn the flag of their adoption and substituting
the hated one of their invaders, there was “not a man in his constituency
so dastardly that his hand and heart would not be palsied at the
thought of such a thing”, and in conclusion he said that he wished
them to understand that “the people in New Orleans, while unable at this
moment to prevent you from
The Yankees had not entered the city, the forts below still held
out, Commodore Duncan says that he will not surrender, so long as there
We heard yesterday of a battle at Yorktown, it was a dreadful battle, the dispatch said that we were in full pursuit of the Yankees, and that their escape had been cut off by the Virginia, but sad to tell Gens. Lee and Joe. Johnston were both killed.
General and President Davis was in command. A battle is daily expected
at Corinth, both armies are concentrating their forces, and will
move as soon as the weather allows roads to dry a little. We have
had a very wet Spring, since May came in it has been very bright warm
weather, however.
Our first sabbath in our new house, how still every thing is, the
sawing and hammering is hushed, and from the grove we hear the twitter
of birds mingled with the noise of chickens and
We moved here Thursday, and ever since then I have been arranging
my things, and getting ready to settle into our casual quiet study life,
Miss Newcomb and Miss Bennet have been spending the last week with Carrie Young, I have seen three times, I was over there yesterday evening, the family were very much delighted by the arrival of their Uncle, Col. Young, from the war.
We have reason now to keep constantly in mind the transitory state
of human affairs, and the need of a more stable hope for every day deepens
the gloom hanging over our country. The victory which was reported
to have taken place at Yorktown was only a false report, it is now said
that Norfolk has Allen and that we have burnt the Virginia in order to
keep her from falling into the hands of the Yankees, New Orleans is in
their possession and their gunboats are coming up the river. It is reported
that there has been a little battle in Virginia in which we were
victorious, It now seem as if it would be a long time before we can have
peace, I can bear it, so long as it bring us peace and liberty at last.
Father has been at home all this week, he is obliged to leave tomorrow. I dread to see him go, even for a day, how much more for such an indefinite period.
Willie has the chills again, he had one day before yesterday, it seems impossible for him to go to the war. Mother received a letter from Grandma Holton yesterday, it is very sad, Horace came out of the skirmish safe, but was killed by a sentinel whom he, himself, had put upon guard and told to shoot any one who came near. Horace passed by, and by some sad mistake the sentinel fired, and killed him immediately. Grandma writes that before his death he was much changed, and seemed very penitent for the errors of his youth. Bernard is worse.
This is the first day of summer, a summer which promises to bring sadness to us, evils thicken around, and the clouds are no longer gathering, they seem about to burst, God grant it may be with blessings, not with cursings. We hear news constantly of some weak rash act, some cowardice, some treason in our Confederacy. Our enemies seem to be gaining ground, but it may be a delusive dream but still I love to cherish, I believe we shall prevail, I believe that God has not, and will not forsake us.
The Yankee gunboats have commenced firing on Vicksburg, damaging some Churches, and private homes, but nothing more. Father brought home last night a sermon of Dr. Lord's on the last infamous proclamation of the Yankee General Butler, it makes one's blood boil to read it. Can we believe that such men will prosper?
The war and public matters occupy my thoughts so much that I
scarcely think of noting down the events of our quiet life, this week,
Monday, I spent the day with Miss Newcomb and Miss Bennett; found Carrie Young there, I enjoyed the day very much, brought home some flower roots and cuttings, and also “Evangeline” and Trelawny's “Last days of Shelly & Byron”, the former I read yesterday, there are many beautiful passages in it; the latter does not deserve to mentioned in the same paragraph, it is, as far as I have gone, hardly worth reading Tuesday night Father came home, Thursday evening we went down to see the Misses Bry, who moved out this week.
This morning Major Bry, Miss Puss and her brother and sister came to see us. Yesterday evening we had quite a little tornado and a heavy shower. Mr. Bennett, who was on his way home from Monroe, stopped in from the rain, he In a very pleasant man, I gave him Jackson's “Tallulah & other poems” to take to Mrs. Bennett, she is a Georgian, and every Georgian's heart must warm over those poems.
Yesterday evening Father brought home a buggy, it is a very nice little one, and very convenient, it seems strange for us to have a buggy, we never had one before. Willie, Grandma and Georgie have gone down to the mill in it this evening.
Willie had a little flower bed fenced off for us, last week, and we have all been very busy in it this week, we have a good many cuttings in it, and some flower seeds planted.
Father left us this evening, he did not know exactly where he would go, or how long he would be gone he may possibly go to Richmond before he returns, every thing is uncertain.
Vicksburg still holds out. We have heard many reports, but do
not know whether to believe them or not. There is report of a battle
Thursday I rode Mollie for the first time. I can now mount her without fear, and am delighted with her. Miss Mary and Willie spent the day at Mrs. Noble's yesterday. Uncle Moses and his family perfectly well.
A month since I have opened my journal book! as I look back upon
it, it seems an age, though the days and weeks pass as a dream; the
times are feverish, and often my heart burns with anxiety and sympathy
for our soldiers, our noble soldiers, yes I will say noble, for erring
and violent as they often are, yet how many noble hearts are among
them! Noble Vicksburg, I am proud of her, she still holds out, though
the large Yankee fleet before the city is constantly bombarding her.
Many of the buildings are injured and some in ruins, the Court house
is still untouched. The Yankees have landed at De Soto and penetrated
ten or twenty miles into the interior, they have seized the negroes from
many plantations along the river, have about two thousand at work cutting
a canal across the point opposite Vicksburg so as to draw off the
river from that noble town, and thus ruin her prosperity. Their gunboats,
too, want a safe passage up the river, and even their gunboats feel a
slight distaste to passing Vicksburg.
There was a youth here today who carries the mail from here to the
Parole of
honnour
Mr. Dwight has been here since I wrote last, he came the 12th June, stayed two weeks, we were all very much pleased with him, he and Mrs. Dwight have bought a place about a half mile from here.
Misses Newcomb and Bennett spent the day with me Thursday. Many of the “summer people” are out here now, all the houses are occupied except Mrs. Drake's, she is at her Father's; within a mile of us, we have for neighbors, Dr. Young, Mrs. Williams, Mrs. Dortch, Mrs. Temple, Mrs. Richardson, Mrs. Fe ohl, Mrs. Wilson and Major Bry's family.
The fourth of July Willie and I spent on Crew lake with a small
party, Maj. Bry and Miss Puss, Mrs. Wilson and daughter, Miss Black,
Miss Bright, Capt. Former, Capt. Martin, Lieut. Holmes, Mr. Douglas,
Mr. Shields, Willie and I. The lake is about thirteen miles from Monroe,
We rode out to the lake on the cars, spent a very pleasant day, catching fish, rowing on the stream, talking and lounging under the shady trees and,—eating dinner.
Willie and I reached home at dusk.
Father did not go to Richmond, he sent Mr. Maguire in his stead, Father has been quite sick for the last two weeks, his sickness was brought on by exposure to the sun, he was walking on the railroad track between two breaks, when he was taken with vomiting, and vomited for half an hour. At length he dragged himself under a woodshed, and lay there all alone for three or four hours, when a hand car came along, took him up and carried him to a house. He stayed there a day, came home, took to his bed and did not rise for a week; he has been into Monroe now twice, but still looks very pale.
Willie has not had a chill in a long time, we hope he is getting
well. Bernard is dead, Mother received news of his death about the middle
of June, Mother is anxious for Grandma to come to her, but she cannot
The weather is very warm and dry now, we have not had rain in a long time, a month, every thing is drying up. Willie will not make any corn; the thermometer stood at 98° today at four o'clock; even the dogwood trees are dying from the drought.—
Oh we have had such a delightful rain, yesterday it rained all day, so softly, that it penetrating the parched earth without washing the soil off. Today it has been showering a little, everything looks so beautiful, the trees are so green and seem almost to speak their thanks for the rain.
Mr. Dwight returned today, and we have not had any school this evening. I have been writing a french translation for tomorrow, and can hardly write correct English now, I have commenced to make the acute and grave accents quite often since I began this.—
Captain Smith came down yesterday morning, he does not look very well, is anxious about his son, who was in the battle of Richmond, he is in Jackson's division, had been (when his Father last heard from him) marching for thirty days, often twenty miles a day, and had a fight nineteen days out of the thirty.
Father start the repairs of the road, the commanding General at Monroe has
ordered the repairs to be continued, they had been stopped so that the
road might not afford facilities to the Yankees in penetrating into
the country, but the General says it is necessary to transport troops
over the road.
A large body of Calvary from Texas passed here the other day, we
waved to them, Miss Mary was in the grove waving and hurrahing, one
cried out to her “I will bring you two Yankees home” “I will not thank
you for so few as that”, she said. He replied enthusiastically, “God
Bless your little Jeff. Davis rebel soul”; a characteristic dialogue,
characteristic of the time, ah! we almost
Peace, how beautiful thou art! I never the happiness of peace
until I felt the bitterness, the weariness of war, now the peaceful
seems to as a dream; and yet even in the midst of war we may have inward
peace, sometimes I realize this, and though I mourn for my country,
mourn for my loved ones, yet I feel sometimes as if I have known
an inward conflict, a conflict of passion and duty, of good and evil
far more difficult to bear that even this heavy heavy
This is one of the saddest pages in my journal, I have not written
here for more than a week, I have not had the heart. Grandma is dead,
she was taken sick just two weeks ago today and died last Sunday (the
27th). We all followed her to the grave on Monday, she is buried almost
in sight of the house, on our land, Oh! what a week this has been, it
seemed as if it would never end. I sat up with Grandma the last night,
she was unconscious for two days, except at short intervals, the last
word she said was “Satira”, I was leaning over her and I think she
Every thing reminds me of her, especially in my room, I could scarcely bear to enter it and am just beginning to overcome the feeling a little; she died in the hall, the hall where she was so fond of sitting we scarcely ever sit there now. It seems months since she was here, though it is not a week since her body lay cold and quiet in that very hall, where we all walked on tiptoe and spoke in whispers, as if death could be disturbed; my mind has been so weak, so very weak, and I have felt so sad, my body too has been sick and today I feel scarcely able to sit up. George is the only well one.
We are all getting better now, but many of us are far from well, Georgie has been complaining for several days. I took medicine and lay in bed Tuesday and was hardly able to sit up for several days after, I feel much better now. John is not at all well, and is very fretful.
Father left home Tuesday to be gone two weeks, but returned very unexpectedly last night, he went to Vicksburg and to Jackson, he looks much better than when he went.
Mr. Green has been in two battles lately, came out of both uninjured,
Father saw it in the papers, I am so glad to hear it, but they are constantly
skirmishing in Virginia and he may not be living now, a number
of young men from Monroe were killed in the late Richmond battle. We
hear of deaths
Mother and I called upon Mrs. Filhiol yesterday, she is a very
pleasant lady, she reminds me so much of Aunt Lydia, her manners are
so like Aunt Lydia's, pleasant and easy; Mr. Filhiol too is a very
agreeable gentleman, reminds me
Miss Scarborough came over to Mrs. Wilson's last week, she and Miss Julia were here Friday.
The weather is warm yet, and dry, but not very dry. I received
letters from Lois and Aunt Mary a week or two ago, Grandma Holton
is at Uncle David's she has been very sick but the country air was improving
her. Lois is at Mr. Holgandorf's still, says she is in excellent health.
The Yankees have come back, a few days ago they came down the river, took a cargo of arms which was lying at the landing, marched over to Tallulah, burned the railroad warehouse and some cars and then marched back to their gunboats again; we had a guard of several hundred men at the river, but they had no head to direct them and ran “like sheep”. Some soldiers have now gone down to the swamp. Father intended to go to Mobile this week but of course he cannot go now. I am sorry, for I think a journey would do him good, he went into Monroe Monday, heard the news, was busy preparing a train to transport the soldiers until eight or nine o'clock, reached Tallulah at twelve; was busy there for some time and did not reach Monroe again until daybreak, he was busy there all day yesterday, returned home about dark and went to bed without any supper. He is thin, weak, and lowspirited. Oh! what would I give to see him well again!
A soldier came here to breakfast this morning, after he had finished and was sitting at the table, Mother told him not to wait if he was in a hurry; “no”, he said, “I am going to take my time going back, I had to run all the way down to Monroe, yesterday”.
General Blanchard sent out an indefinite order to the camps, and all the men that were able, went off, the consequence was there were too many and some had to march back immediately. Capt. Sam. Adams is at home on furlough.
Monday morning Mother and I were sitting sewing when we were surprised by his entrance, accompanied by a Mr. Golding; we had not expected the honor of a visit from him; as it was, he came to see about buying a negro. He is much improved since he went, not near so conceited, apparently, and more polished in his manners; there is a familiarity about him, however, which repels me; I may be too romantic in my ideas, but I like to see a gentleman's manner towards a lady respectful even to reverence.
We have a vacation now, we have no school since Grandma's death.
I have been busy, since I have been well enough to do anything, making
out a list of British poets and writing down the most important events
of their lives, this keeps me contented
It is now nearly four months since I heard a word from my dear
Miss Valeria, though I have written several letters to her, sometimes
I long to see her with a longing that cannot be described. Now when I
am in my room, every where I turn I see something to remind me of my
departed Grandmother. I stay here no more than I can help; I have visited
her grave only once though I feel I ought to go there; the sorrow in
We have had no rain yet; Willie says if we do not have rain soon all the crops will be ruined; the dust in the road is perfectly suffocating. Mrs. Richardson and sister were over here Monday, they are very pleasant ladies. I think I like Mrs. Scarborough best.
The last day of the month and also of our vacation, tomorrow we
commence school again, I have not accomplished half the work which I
allotted to this vacation. Alas! I could not
I received a letter from Miss Ginnie Calwell last night, it brought sad news to me, the Ridgills have left Amite, that was in June, three months ago, and I have not heard from Miss Valeria yet. I don't know what can have happened, if I could only hear from her, she is one of my few loved, they are few whom I love, but oh! how my heart clings to them.
I ought to feel thankful this evening, and I indeed I do feel so,
though I cannot but be a little sad; we have had quite a little shower
this evening, hardly enough to lay the dust but there is prospect of
more, it has been so dry everything is burning up, even this little
shower refreshes us, though it has now nearly all dried into the parched
earth.
Father returned from Jackson, Miss. last night, he crossed the
Father came from Jackson to Vicksburg with Dr. Lord and Bishop
Green, the Bishop had not received a letter from his nephew, neither
had any one else that Father saw, though Mr. Smedes had heard of him
through his son, who is a lieutenant in Capt. Green's company, he says
that Capt. Green behaved with great gallantry, their regiment was in
that desperate charge in which so many brave men were fruitlessly sacrificed;
they were commanded to lie down to shield themselves from
the deadly fire, and kept that position an hour, when finally, they
were allowed to retire, Capt. Green found himself alone with two of
his lieutenants and four men, the rest were killed wounded, and missing,
of course many came back again after the fight was over.
Puss Bry spent the day with us yesterday, Capt. Sam. Adams has been very sick, is better now, Mr. Dillard has also been very low, his situation is now precarious. All our family are quite well now. We have commenced reading aloud again, last we begun “Anne of Guirstein”, we enjoy it very much, Willie is exceedingly interested in it. We shall have little time for reading when school commences again.
We commenced school a week ago Monday and have been studying steadily
ever since, it seems natural to be in school again, and makes me
feel happier. Mrs. Dwight is an excellent french and music scholar,
and I am perfectly satisfied with her as a teacher for me; but I am
afraid that she is not all I at first thought, and not capable of
disciplining the mind of a child. Eva does not understand her studies
as she ought to do, and Miss Mary, though she has improved in some
It is almost the middle of September, I can hardly believe that winter is so near, yesterday evening the air was really like fall; today it has been warmer. Our house gets on slowly, they are now at work on the pantry, Mr. Axley is making sash.
Willie commenced making brick about two weeks ago; our chimneys cannot be finished until those bricks are burned.
Uncle Moses left for Georgia on Wednesday, I spent the day with Aunt Jane. Thursday, at Mrs. Garrett's Miss Sarah Garrett is a very pleasant young lady, I think I should like her very much.
We have had no rain yet, several times it has clouded up, thundered and lightened and a few drops fallen, but not enough to lay the dust.
I must close my book now and get ready to go over to Dr. Young's to see Carrie and the Misses Compton; we have so many neighbors to visit that I seldom spend an evening at home, they will soon leave, now that fall is coming on. Willie and I took a ride with Miss Julia and Miss Tabitha Thursday evening, enjoyed it very much, only Miss Julia's pony stumbled and threw her off, but she was not hurt.
Emmeline had a baby on the 4th—
I have time this evening to write a few lines in my journal, and
this is a thing of such rare occurrence that I must not let the opportunity
pass. I was very much relieved and rejoiced day before yesterday
by a long letter from Miss Valeria, telling me all about their removal
from Amite and their journeyings to Sharon Mississippi, again today I
We are having good news from the war now, on every side our armies are triumphant and are driving the Yankees from Tennessee, Kentucky, and Virginia, while Vicksburg stands firm, and we hear that the Yankees are dying by hundreds in New Orleans, this last is an awful thing to rejoice over, and yet such the fate of a bloody war and such are the feelings which it engenders, even in the merciful heart of a woman.
Father left us this morning for Jackson, we do not expect him home until next Wednesday, he is improving very much now, and I rejoice to see that with health he is regaining his spirits.
Mrs. Wilson moved to the swamp Monday. Fall is already here, I am
just beginning to realize that it is the middle of September, we have
had no rain yet. Last night there was a very cold drizzle which lasted
for about half an hour and then every appearance of a storm, we thought
that the very warm, but this evening it is quite
chilly, the sky is threatening and we hear distant thunder now and then.
Miss Julia Compton spent the day here today, or rather, took
dinner here, she and Mother went to Trenton this evening, they have
not yet returned; though it, is nearly dark and expect them every moment.
The work on the house appears to progress more rapidly now, yesterday and today they put up the bookshelves in the parlour, I long for the time to come when we may arrange the books on them, Mr. Axley will soon be done the sash for my room; and the pantry is nearly finished Father said yesterday that he expected to move us downstairs when he returned next week. The clouds are very black, oh! may they bring rain, the earth is parched like a brick, and the dust is over the shoetops.
We have had two or three good rains since I wrote last, the cloud I spoke of in my last entry did indeed bring rain, a dreadful storm. Mother and Julia Compton were in the whole of it, when they arrived they were of course drenched to the skin; Julia spent the night here, she rather enjoyed her adventure than otherwise, she is a frank, pleasant girl, but not of very great depth of character; one cannot avoid liking her, however, nor can one be ceremonious with her. The whole family arrived yesterday and went up to their place. The weather is now quite warm, last week the mornings and evenings were very cool indeed.
Friday night two soldiers lodged here, they belong to Wall's Texas
legion, company Sunderland braves, cavalry. One of them was but seventeen
years old and looked much younger, his complexion was not yet
brown face, jet
black hair, hazel eyes, and a slight black moustache, he spoke more
than the other, and appeared very intelligent, and well bred, though
quite plain. He was very gallant too, and proud of Texas and her soldiers
and his company and Captain. A division of the “legion” passed
the next morning, before he left he told us of the different companies
as they passed, their hurrahs for Louisiana and the ladies were deafening;
we said that some of the troops did not hurrah to us though we
waved to them. “Ah !” said he “they don't know any, better, there are a
great many dutch among them who don't care for anything, I despise
them”, then, as his company came along he said “See,
Capt. Smith came down here last night, he is going away tomorrow
our yard; the salt will probably
cost Father five dollars a bushel and the hauling of about seventy
miles.
Mrs. Williams will move this week, there will then be none of the summer residents here except Major Bry's family. The good news from the war continues to arrive, we hear of some new feat of arms nearly every day. Longstreet's division has been in nearly all the late battles, I tremble to think of John Ridgill. Mr. Green's company is also in that division, Oh! for peace, but war rather than peace except with perfect independence, and this the infatuated north is not yet willing to give us.
Miss Mary and I planted some violets on Grandma's grave Friday, they were part of those Mrs. Drake gave us, Grandma used to watch their growth with us, little did she think they would bloom upon her grave; Oh! how constantly we should remember that death is ever near us.
This is an ever memorable week to me, for this week we moved
downstairs, and I feel once more at home, yes at home again after
five years of wandering, five years in which I have experienced my
first considerable trials, my first disappointments, five years in
which I known much happiness, and lastly, greatest of all, years in
which I hope, I believe, that I have been able to see the light that
dwells in darkness, and to draw near to the holy of holies. My heart
It is quite cold today, and it was not till ten o'clock this morning that the sun was able to penetrate through the cold gray clouds which covered the sky, but now it is shining brightly and I no longer shiver, though I still wear a shawl.
This morning we had three men here to breakfast who were on their way to get salt for the volunteer's families, they told Father if ever he was in their country and wanted a meal to come to them “we are all Confederate brothers you know” said one.
While we were at dinner a man came up and asked one of the servants if he could get dinner for six, “Are they soldiers?” said Mother, “they don't look like it ma'am”, she answered “well” said Mother, “tell them they can't have dinner, I have only enough for my own family”, he went out but the other four came in, said they were soldiers, we all begged for them and Mother sent Miss Mary out to tell them to come in, there were three Texans guarding a deserter, he was an irishman who had been hired as a substitute, we all pitied him very much, but he did not seem at all distressed.
Reuben came back from the salt works yesterday.
I received a letter from Miss Valeria day before yesterday, Angus had been home on a furlough, and John came out of the battle safe, I was so glad to hear it.
Father received a letter from Mrs. Veader Friday, she had just
We heard today of a defeat sustained by Price and VanDorn, from
Rozencrans, (despicable german!) they say, however, that there were
twelve Yankees to our one, we have heard no particulars but Father
says he thinks Van Dorn must be to blame, for Price is
Father left us yesterday evening to be absent a whole month, how long the time seems! he is gone to Georgia.
We have a poor woman staying here tonight for whom my heart bleeds, she went down to the camps on horseback with her baby, only seven months old; to nurse her husband, when she arrived there this morning she found him dead and buried. She is now on her way back to her sad home. She is a very young woman, apparently quite poor, and has no parents living, as I hear her deep and frequent sighs from the adjoining room I can only pity her and be grateful for all the blessings that surround me. Oh! how many, many such widows this war will make, nay, has already made; scarcely a family but has lost one member.
Willie has not been very well today and yesterday, Saturday he took a ride of thirty miles after some oxen, and again Monday, since then, he has been very tired.
Mrs. Young has a baby boy, born today.
Oh! how cold it has been, I shiver to think of it, Saturday night
my flowers froze in my room, and I could not keep warm in bed, though
I spent Saturday with the Misses Compton, passed a very pleasant day, in the evening Col. Gibson, from Mallison Parish, who has been up at the salt works making salt, came in, he is a very pleasant gentleman indeed. Mrs. Dwight moved into her new room yesterday, it is all ceiled and therefore more comfortable than the other, though she cannot yet have a fire, for the chimney is not quite finished; I have not been able to have a fire in my room yet on that account. They are building the brickkiln now, and I hope the chimneys will be finished before we have any more such cold weather.
My poor little Valeria had some of her leaves frozen the other night,
but one side is still green and untouched; I could not bear for it to
die,
We have not heard from Father since he left, the two weeks past seem a long time, and I long for the next two to be past. We have heard of a victory gained by Bragg over Buell in Kentucky, the battle is said to have taken place some weeks ago, but we have not yet heard any particulars of it. Carrie Young came over here yesterday evening, she looks quite thin.
Mr. Drake called here this morning, has been to Texas, he was looking very well.
A week ago today was Willie's twenty first birthday, he is now a
man, my dearest brother, the companion of my childhood is a man. How
strange it seems, I cannot think of his otherwise than as he has always
Julia Compton and her sister Maggie spent yesterday with me, the day passed very pleasantly.
We have a poor, sick soldier here, he came Monday, has two brothers
with him; the poor man was not well when he left home, and has
been in the hospital three months. He is a perfect skeleton, and
could not walk up stairs, but is anxious to get home and would have
started today, but it is threatening rain, and Mother thought he had
better not go. They are of the poorer class of people, but are well
clothed in complete suite of homespun, the two well ones have very
heavy, dull intellects, they seem to be good people, but it is almost
impossible to get them to say anything but yes and no. Mother says
they are like all of the good country people are, very shy, especially
among strangers.
Oh how the wind blows, I think it will rain, I hope so, for the
dust is suffocating and the turnirps need rain very much. What changes
have taken place outdoors since a few days, the oaks are all brown,
and the leaves of many trees are already falling, such a frost as we
had in October is seldom seen here so early. But though the oaks are
seared some of the other trees still preserve their bright red and
yellow leaves and enliven the landscape.
It is so dark now that I must stop writing.
Two of those men I mentioned are gone, but one, not the very sick one, is here still, he was taken sick the night before his brothers left, the doctor thinks he has typhoid fever, his name is George Woodard. It appears that he left his company without a furlough only to be absent one day, today an officer of his company came after him, but went away again finding that he was sick, he is going to send the sick man's brother to wait upon him.
The officer who came today amused us all a great deal by his conversation,
he said at dinner, speaking of camp fare “I used to think
it was mighty hard living it I could not have just what I wanted, but
now I would walk half a mile for that potatoe” then seeing us smile
incredulously be continued “Yes, I would, and so would any of the boys
if they tuk a notion for it”. Poor soldiers! I am sorry for them. Oh!
when will we have peace. We have heard nothing from Father since he
left, though it is now more than three weeks, as the time for his coming
draws nearer, I become more and more impatient to see him.
Saturday morning we were very agreeably surprised by a visit from
Mrs. Bennett and her daughter, they had been at Monroe and were going
home that evening, so that they could not stay and dine with us. The
young ladies are coming down soon, and promised to spend some time with
me. We had just sat down to dinner when Emmeline came in to say that
there was a carriage at the door, with what looked like a sick soldier
in it. Mother told Willie to go and see, and tell him we had a sick man
here and could take no one, after some minutes of impatience on our
part we found that it was Mr. Murrah with two other gentlemen, we have
bought for
five hundred dollars, though he has known a thousand to be given. He
says those persons who take the oath are not allowed to leave the city
except to go to the United States. He said that those negroe regiments
the Yankees have are more trouble than use to them, they have to watch
them closely to prevent their running back to their masters.
This soldier is still sick here, the doctor came this morning, pronounces his disease camp fever, says he will probably recover soon. The soldier's brother came and spent the day and night with him Saturday, but his regiment was ordered off and he could not stay.
It is very warm tonight, we are all hoping for rain, we are in great need of it. Willie left home yesterday to look up some pork, we expect him back tonight.
We are reading Prescott's conquest of Mexico now, commenced it last week, we find it very entertaining.
This morning we were most delightfully surprised on waking up to
Father here, at least we all were surprised except Mother and
I cannot bear the thought of his being absent another week, perhaps longer.
This poor soldier here is very ill indeed, his wife came this morning, he seems to know her, but cannot speak to her, lies and groans constantly, it is pitiful to hear him, one can hear him as soon as they approach the house and he sleeps very little; I have been with him all day today and must go up again now.
Our poor soldier died Saturday night, and was buried Sunday, his widow is still here but will probably leave tonight, poor woman, I am very sorry for her.
Mr. Horne spent Sunday with us, he looks very well indeed.
Last night we had rain all night and today it has been so damp
that we could not have school. I have been very busy, however, reading
French, mending gloves, marking socks, writing letters for Father to
take with him and mending Eva's doll, it is one which she prized very
highly, John broke it yesterday and she sorrowed deeply over it, but
I think I can mend
Father brought me such a beautiful present for my eighteenth birthday,
I feel almost guilty to have such a present now but it was a perfect
Father also brought home with him a beautifully bound copy of Humbolt's Cosmos, I anticipate great pleasure in reading, but fear I shall not yet be able to understand it.
Father left Tuesday, another month of waiting is before us now. The small pox is at the camps, several have died with it, we are anxious to have the children vaccinated, but cannot get any matter.
At last they have commenced burning the brick kiln, it has now been burning two nights we have been out to see it each night, it has been beautiful starlight and we have had an excellent opportunity of observing the stars, the trees no longer interpose a leafy screen between us and the heavens, nearly all of them are bare now.
This is a delightful day, the sky is perfectly blue and the air
warm but bracing, as I sit here the perfumes of our heliotropes and
geranium reaches me, and
My eighteenth birthday has come and gone, I have now reached a period long looked forward for I am now a young lady. I do not feel the weight of my new dignity much, however. Yesterday I finished reading Paradise lost and commenced “Cosmos”. What a sublime work Paradise lost is, and there are touches of exquisite beauty as well as grandeur, I closed the book with a clearer conception of the divine scheme of redemption, and a deeper love of Christ in my heart. I am anxious to read some in Cosmos before Father returns, but I do not have a great deal of time for reading.
I received a letter from Miss Ginnie Calwell last week, she was on the eve of starting for N. Orleans, said Butler would allow ladies to go in and out now, and that a great many are going down to attend to their husband's business. She says anyone can bring goods out of the city by paying Butler, I want none of his goods and I should not trust myself to the whim of the brute Butler, as he is commonly called. What sanctity can the publisher of his proclamation accord to the name of woman.
Mother has gone into Trenton this evening to see Mrs. Cauthorn, who was thought to be dying last week, and is still very ill indeed, she has a young baby, I hope she may be spared for her children's sake.
We are having delightful weather now, this morning it was very damp but has cleared off now, and the wind is blowing the leaves in whirlpools around the yard. We have had no war news for some time.
The small pox is really in Monroe, there are now four cases there,
not soldiers but in private families, we have at last succeeded in
getting some vaccine matter, two returned soldiers stopped here last
Willie is not at home now, he left Sunday to go about sixty miles
from here into Arkansas to try and get some hogs, I hope he will succeed,
it is very difficult to get meat at any price here, pork is twenty-five
cents, and bacon impossible to get, the last was bought at fifty
cents. We expect Willie back tomorrow or next day.
We heard from Father Sunday, he telegraphed from Richmond to Mr. McGuire to call a meeting of the directors to elect a president for this road in his stead, so I suppose he has accepted the situation. I am sorry and yet I am glad, for I know he can do a great deal of good for the Country, and I feel that we ought not to think of ourselves— it will be hard to be separated from him.
Saturday evening Julia Compton and Miss Lucy Seale came down to see me, Julia invited me to go home and spend the night with her, I went, and enjoyed myself very well, became acquainted with Mrs. Compton and Miss Mary, and learned how to plait palmetto for hats, Maggie was plaiting some for a hat for one of the negroes.
The weather is delightful now, it rained all the first part of last week, but has been clear ever since Thursday. I commenced “Cosmos” a week ago Saturday, but have only had time to finish the introduction yet.
We have our first fire in our room
We have some more poor people here tonight, a young soldier who was taken sick in the swamp, his Father came for him, and was himself attached with inflammatory rheumatism, lastly the Mother left her young children and came down for them, hearing of the small pox in Monroe they left immediately, though the son is very weak and the father not able to be taken out of the carriage. The young man was carried upstairs, but the poor woman was obliged to stay out at the carriage with her husband. Oh! this terrible war.
Since I wrote last we have heard again from Father, Mother received
a letter from him last Saturday he has really accepted the position
offered him as chief of all the railroads in our Confederacy, with the
title of Assistant adjutant Gen'l. and with the rank of Colonel, he says
that it is the opinion of the secretary of war that it will be necessary
for his to have a separate bureau. I grieve to have Father separated
from us, but am willing to submit to this if he can benefit our country,
and I know he can do it; I feel no selfish pride in his elevation to
such a conspicuous and important position, though I feel a worthy pride
in my Father when I reflect on the change which his own intellect, industry
and energy have produced since he set his foot on Georgia soil,
a youth of twenty, with no fortune but his trade, a half dollar and a
few changes of clothes, and—his own genius and will; now he can protect
and aid the country which has been his foster mother.
Father writes that it he establishes his headquarters in Richmond
he should like to have me spend several months there, I should like to
go very much on some accounts, but yet I wish to remain at home. We hope
All the children were vaccinated Sunday morning, also some from the neighborhood, the matter was taken from the arms of Joe and George.
We had such an amusing traveller here the other night, he was a
perfect fool, I have read of such characters but never met one before,
he kept us all in a constant agony of suppressed laughter. He said he
was sometimes afraid that the prophecies of Isaiah would now be accomplished
from “the simple fact” that the “masculine gender would be almost
extinguished by this war”—how ridiculous!
Christmas night, it has been a sad Christmas day to us Father was not here, we received a dispatch Tuesday night saying that he must return to Richmond before coming home, it was a great disappointment, since we had at least hoped that he would arrive Christmas eve. Today has seemed just like Sunday, while at dinner we received some papers one of which contained a list of the wounded, among them was a Capt. Green. I am sure it must be Mr. Robt. Green, for he was at Fredericksburg and was in the 21st regiment.
Mother and I went to see a new neighbour, a family from the swamp who have rented Mr. Richardson's place just opposite, their name is Dawson, there are three young ladies in the family, we only saw the eldest she is quite pretty, pleasant and of a fashionable appearance.
Mrs. Wheatly was married Tuesday night to Mr. Mays, the soldier whom she has nursed so long. There was no one invited, as the bridegroom was too lame to stand and did not wish to have any company.
Our turn has come at last, we heard this morning that the Yankees
had come as far as Delhi (on the railroad) burning everything in their
The negroes are busy barbecueing and cooking for their party tonight, they may have to start away before day, but we shall let enjoy themselves while they can.
Willie returned this evening, bringing us no further news, Mr. McGuire thinks that the Yankees have e'er this gone back to their gunboats, it is true that they laid Delhi in ashes.
General Blanchard has ordered all the men under forty five to meet at Cotton post tomorrow morning early, he purposes to make a stand at Monroe, I hope he will.
We have been watching the negroes dancing for the last two hours, Mother had the partition taken down in our old house so that they have quite a long ball room, we can sit on the piazza and look into it. I hear now the sounds of fiddle, tambourine and “bones” mingled with the shuffling and pounding of feet. Mr. Axley is fiddling for them, they are having a merry time, thoughtless creatures, they think not of the morrow.
I am sad, very sad, tonight, last Christmas Father watched their dancing with us; where is he now? where shall we all be next Christmas, and tomorrow Willie must go, perhaps to battle, I do not feel a single complaint in my heart, but I am very sad.
Monday Dec. 28th—Willie went to Monroe Saturday and brought back
and there was a whole company of our
soldiers in the but they happened to be watching the wrong place, if
we only had a man for a General instead of the effeminate creature
we have, these raids might be prevented, and this important railroad
left open for the benefit of the whole country.
Mr. Murrah dined with us yesterday, he was on his way to Mississippi but was stopped by this Yankee demolition of the railroad and will be obliged to travel from Delhi to the river on horseback.
We have not yet heard from Father.
The old year is past and today a new one commences. I feel inclined
to look back tonight upon the past year, gone now, with all its duties
neglected or performed, all
Miss Mary Compton called here this morning, this evening Mother, Miss Mary, Eva and I went over to Mrs. Dawson's, heard some beautiful singing tram the young ladies. Willie has been away all day for pork, returned with a load tonight and is now busy in cutting it up.
We were all very much surprised yesterday by Mr. Dwight's arrival, for although we have been expecting him so long, he had so often failed to come that we began to think of him as a thing of the past.
Mother went in to Trenton yesterday to see poor Mrs. Bry, Mrs. Cauthorn died the day before New Years, after a long and painful illness.
It appears that we were misinformed about the conduct of our men in the swamp and that they were surrounded by a greatly superior force and made their escape in a masterly manner.
It rained all night and is now raining, my room floor is quite wet from a leak, it seems almost impossible to stop it. Willie came home last night in the rain, but no bad consequences ensued from it.
Yesterday evening we were surprised by a visit from young Robert
Smith, he has changed very much since he was here last year, looks
pale and sad; poor fellow, he returned home the morning of the day in
which his Father died, he did not know of his sickness. He has been in
eleven battles, in nine of which he was actively engaged, at last he
was wounded in the hand in August, and came home last month on furlough,
We hear that Butler has been arrested on a charge of defalcation
to the amount of six millions! we are certain that he has been superseded
by Banks, who has revoked all the late brutish orders of Butler
and invited the citizens to return to their homes. I hope none will
return, I am more afraid of the kindness of the Yankees than of their
unkindness. We hear also that Seward has resigned.
Father has not come yet, how I long for his coming.
Mr. Smith left Thursday morning, we have not heard from Father yet. The weather is cold and damp. Dr. Temple has bought Mrs. Dwight's place and moved into it; Mrs. Dwight asked Mother, with tears in her eyes to let her remain here for a month, and teach us French and music for her board; of course Mother could not say no, though she would have preferred a different arrangement.
I spent the day at Mrs. Dawson's Wednesday, it passed away very quickly and pleasantly—
We received a letter from Father yesterday, oh, how glad we were, he wrote on the 21st of Dec. says he cannot possibly get home before the middle of this month, it is almost here now, we may begin to expect him about the last of this week.
We went to Church yesterday evening for the first time in many
months; heard Mr. Goodwin (the new minister) preach, I was not much pleased
with his sermon, but as usual found something in it to arouse my
Monday Willie and I went about eighteen miles from here into the
country, across the Schuder, as every one says; it is there that Willie
has been buying his pork. We went in the buggy and were riding from
nine o'clock until after dark, only stopping about two hours and a
half; the face of the country is much the same as it in here, but
much more thinly settled, we saw five or six very good houses. Took
dinner at the house of old Mr. Reynolds, a fine old man, from Georgia.
Mrs. Seale, Mrs. Morris and Miss Scott spent the day here Monday, I was sorry I was not at home to see them. Miss Newcomb and sister also called to see me in the afternoon; I went over to see them yesterday afternoon but they had gone to Mrs. Compton's.
Willie went off for pork again yesterday after dinner, has not returned yet. Last night a wounded soldier from Minden stopped, was very well acquainted with young Smith.
This morning when we rose little Jim, who came to make our fire
this morning said “Miss Sarah, it's snowing” I looked out of the window
and sure enough there was the white fleecy snow, falling in large flakes,
it had just commenced, we could hardly dress for looking at it, none
of us had ever seen it in day time before, and we were perfectly
delighted with the beautiful sight; it snowed quite steadily for
about an hour, but the ground was very wet from yesterday's and last
leaden hues that I have never seen before;
such a peculiarly snowy and cold sky. We have had few gleams of sunshine
today but as I write “the western waves of ebbing day” throw
their golden light upon my page, giving promise of a sunshiny day
tomorrow.
Poor little John has a dreadful cold, last night he was very sick,
and Mother was afraid he would have the
I have just finished, answering a letter from Mrs. Yorke, Mr. Smith's sister, in relation to some pork which she wished to sell to Willie.
Today is the fifteenth, I wonder if Father will come tonight.—
Oh what weather, cold as zero—last night it snowed again but this morning it is too cold to snow, everything, is frozen—the water in pitchers and basins and vases, and all my poor flowers; my poor little Valeria is frozen stiff, I have been pouring cold water on it, which iced on the leaves, now I have it close to the fire, I am afraid it is gone, I would not have given it for all my other flowers.
The sky is blue this morning and the sun shines brightly on the
white and frozen landscape, icicles hang from the houses, and every
little twig whitened with snow stands out still and distinct against
the bright sky. I must stop writing, for although I am as close the fire
The cold weather is gone now, but it has left irreparable ravages, my poor geranium and the heliotropes look quite dead, though I hope they will put forth fresh leaves in the spring. Miss Newcomb and her sister have returned home without paying me the visit they promised, they only called here for a few minutes Saturday, I was at Mrs. Dawson's but came home before they left, I was quite hurt at their not coming to see me, but I am afraid I have been again mistaken in my estimate of character.
I received a long and affectionate letter from Miss Valeria Saturday, that is worth a dozen visits from anyone else.—
Sunday Willie and Mr. Dwight took their buggies and went into Trenton for Miss Lucy Seale and Miss Amelia Scott, they came out intending to spend a week with me, but were obliged to return as Mrs. Scott's wagons arrived Sunday, and she wished to go to her place beyond Vernon; they spent the night with me, and did not return home until yesterday afternoon; yesterday we sent over for Miss Fannie and Miss Nannie to come and spend the day with us, we enjoyed the day very much, though the weather was very disagreeable, misty, cold and rainy, it cleared up though after dinner, and the sun set clear, but this morning it is cloudy again.
We heard yesterday that Hindman had been taken, together with four thousand men, I hope it is not true.—
I went in to see Mrs. Seale yesterday, found her and Lucy at home
and spent a very pleasant day, I am afraid I cannot say as much for Loring,
Miss Mary and I spent the day at Mrs. Dawson's yesterday, when I first went I intended only to stay a few minutes, in fact I went to get some palmetto and to hear Miss Fannie sing La Marseillaise, but Mr. Amos came in before we had been there long, and as he said he should only remain a few minutes, I thought I would remain till he left, then it was near dinner and Mrs. Dawson pressed us to stay, the day passes so quickly, in music, conversation, and books, that I could scarcely believe it when I heard five o'clock strike.
Miss Mary had a dreadful toothache last night, I thought she
would not have any rest, but she went to sleep and awoke this morning
quite free from pain. It is quite cold again, we had ice this morning,
not in our room, however.
We heard yesterday that six of the western states had sent delegates to Richmond asking admittance to the Confederacy, I don't know how true it is; I am glad to see them leave the North, but I had rather not have them with us.
The children went to a little party at Mrs. Dawson's yesterday, and returned in high spirits.
Our little school goes on quite well still, I truly happy, though I am
afraid I do not always set a consistent example, but my indolence and
selfishness retards the work I would accomplish.
As for myself, I find my heart so full of sinful feelings that I am ready to say “I am the chief of sinners” and I often fear that I shall never find that perfect peace that the bible promises; but I must keep on trying, and if I do the bible promises I shall at last succeed.—
It has been raining steadily since yesterday morning, drip, drip, drip without a moment's intermission, and it seems as if it will continue all day, Willie just arrived in time. My boil burst last night, and does not pain me at all this morning. I hope I shall soon be able to wear my dress again. It is now nine o'clock, and I must go to school.
I have neglected my journal, very much indeed lately, I do not know
why it in but I have become very reluctant to write at all lately, except
to Miss Valeria. I suppose it is in some degree owing to my
Here it is the fourth day of Spring, and I have not yet welcomed
it in my journal, though I have longed for it so much, for I feel as
if the painful thoughts and sad remembrances which this winter has
brought will be in some degree dissipated by the mild air and flowers
of Spring, for who can be entirely sad when nature is bursting into life
and beauty around. Oh, how lovely is Spring, I am almost sorry to see
her development, so quickly does she pass away, merging all her bright
freshness into the voluptuous dreaminess of summer. The peach trees have
Willie went into town yesterday, and procured seventy two trees from Dr. Calderwood's nursery, they are nearly all apple trees, only eight pears, he is going to set them out this morning. Mother sent to Mrs. Bry's last week and got some cuttings, and some flowers which are planted in our little garden; our heliotropes have all come out beautifully, and my geranium is getting to look quite green again, I had them all carried up stairs last week.
Mr. Myrick spent the day with us Sunday the 22nd Feb'y—left for Georgia the next week; we sent a number of letters by him, he said that Father would probably return with him in April, so we now look forward anxiously to April it is now three months and a half since Father left us! he was never absent so long at a time before.
Julia Compton spent last week in our neighborhood, she stayed three days with me, the rest of the time with Carrie and the Miss Dawsons, we had quite a gay time, took several horseback rides, and spent one evening all together at Mrs. Dawson's. Miss Mary Compton spent Monday with us, went home in the afternoon, I promised to go up there Friday and stay till Saturday evening. Willie is getting quite fond of the young ladies' company, enjoys his rides with them very much, and I observe he is more scrupulous about his dress than formerly.
Mrs. Brinton spent yesterday here with her youngest son.
This is Miss Mary's birthday, so we have no school, she received
no present, except a little pincushion from Eva, which pleased her
I finished Corinne this morning, it is indeed a beautiful book. We are all reading Home influence and Mother's recompense together, have nearly finished it.
I received a letter from Miss Valeria week before last, answered it by Mr. Myrick, every letter from increases my love and esteem for her, oh, if I could but see her, even for a little while, it would be such a pleasure.
I have another of those painful and troublesome boils under my arm, it is almost well now.
We have just received a letter from Father, it is the first we have had in more than a month, he is quite well, or was on the 6th of February (the date of his letter), and I thank God for that, but he says his duties are very arduous and very annoying, and that he has been more than once tempted to resign, but was withheld by a sense of duty. He says that he had been expecting for two weeks to leave for home, but had not been able, and did not that expect to start for a week, he must have been again prevented. Oh, how, we long to see him.
It is so cold today, and has been so since Monday, it is hard to bear after the delightful weather of last week.
We were at Mrs. Compton's yesterday evening, rode back home by starlight, with Miss Fanny Dawson, and Virginia and Adam Young.
I have at last paid my long promised visit to the
Monday afternoon Miss Julia Willson, Miss Tabitha Scarborough and
I went to ride on horseback, we had a delightful ride along the side
of the bayou, which is now very high, but oh, how I missed my dear little
Mollie as soon as I mounted it seemed so natural to give her the rein
and say “get up Mollie”, but instead of her charming
We rode about four miles to an Indian mound where we dismounted,
tied our horses and ascended the mound, it is situated just at the mouth
of bayou de Leard, and we could look down the river some distance. The
water looked still and beautiful in the light of the setting sun, over
the narrow neck of land just opposite we could see the overflow, a watery
expanse, stretching away as far as the eye could reach, it is the plantation
of Mr. Goodrich and his house is just opposite the mound. He sent
over a flat for us, and we went over to his house for a few moments,
here we saw Mrs. Scarborough, who was spending a few days there. Crossing
over again, we rode home, did not reach there till it was quite dark,
on dismounting from our horses we were met by Dr. Strother, he greeted
me warmly as “Miss Sarah”. Tabitha and I exchanged glances, I had just
Tuesday Julia, Tabitha, and I went into Monroe. We called at Mrs. Judge Bry's saw Mrs. Mason, she has the most emaciated form, and deathly expression I ever saw on any face. We dined at Mrs. Stevens'.
There was a meeting of the D. D. D's (a young ladies' company in
Monroe) in the afternoon, after which we went home to Mrs. Willson's.
While were disrobing we heard the voices of Judge Scarborough and Mr.
Shields in the hall below, they had just returned from the hunt; we soon
descended and heard all the particulars, how they had been several times
nearly mired up in the woods, how the party had become separated, and,
lastly, how Mr. Shields had seen ten deer and shot several times—without
killing one. About half past seven or eight the two doctors arrived, in
Wednesday morning we spent quietly at home, I taught Tabitha and
Agnes Willson how to nett, they were both very much pleased with the
work. In the evening we rode on horseback again, we went through some
beautiful woods, where beneath the gray moss which hung from all the
old trees, there were many beautiful dogwoods and haw trees, and some
jasmines and honeysuckles in full bloom. We gathered some for Mrs.
Willson, who is passionately fond of flowers, but these flat woods
We returned from our ride very much fatigued, and putting on our calico dresses went into the parlour where I threw myself on one of the sofas which stood invitingly near and the others established themselves comfortably in some arm chairs around, in a few minutes Mrs. Willson and Julia drew up the card table, and insisted that I should join them in a game. I do not like cards, and am perfectly ignorant of the science of playing, but I was obliged to take my seat at the table, we had just commenced playing when we heard a knock at the door, and soon the servant brought up word that several gentlemen were in the hall, this of course created quite a confusion; Mrs. Willson went down and received them, soon they were ushered in and I was introduced to Lieuts. Cobb and Flournoy and Capt. Martin. The evening passed very pleasantly, I was very much pleased with Lieut. Flournoy, found him very agreeable, though his attentions were much confined to Julia.
The gentlemen left late, and my head was not laid on the pillow till one o'clock again.
Thursday morning we went in to Mrs. Stevens. Soon after I arrived
there, a steamboat came up with a band of music on board, and was received
with shouts of joy. We could not imagine what produced so much
excitement,—Mary was not at home, Mrs. Stevens said I must go up on
the balcony upstairs, I was reluctant to do so as there was a wounded
soldier up there, but she insisted, and I followed her. Lieut. Lacy was
on the piazza, his leg supported on a chair, he was all afire with excitement
at hearing the martial music. We soon found that all the music
and excitement was caused by the fact that Gen. Price was on board; Mary
soon returned, and we were all talking about the boat when Mr. Wade and
Dr. Cummings came over to see her pass up, we went out on the Piazza and
In the afternoon Mary and I took a delightful walk up the river
bank, it was just about sunset, and the river was beautiful, the
banks too looked so green and all the trees were clothed in the soft
verdure of Spring, Mary and I were filled with calm, happy delight, we
better acquainted in that one short walk than we would in days of indoor
life. I like Mary very much, she is so good in her family, and
yet she is by no means dull, as some very good people are.
On our way home we stopped at Mrs. McGuire's, Mary's great Aunt, and saw some beautiful flowers. Mr. Ray came in while we were there, he enquired after Father, as every one did who saw me.
Mary and I had quite a race home, and in consequence our dress was somewhat disarranged, my hair was all down, and we remarked while smoothing our hair that we hoped no one would come in during the evening, as we did not feel like dressing. “Come” said Mary, “It is so warm let's go out on the gallery” “Oh, Yes” I said, and we went out into the hall, who should we see but Dr. Strother standing quietly in the door. I think he must have heard our conversation, for we spoke in quite a loud tone of voice, at first sight of him we stood still in surprise, and then we all three laughed, of course an evening thus commenced could not but be spent agreeably, the doctor stayed till quite late, I was very much pleased with him, he has such frank, pleasant manners, and converses so agreeably.
Friday Miss Sarah Garrett spent the day at Mrs. Stevens', just as
we were rising from the table Mrs. Knox came up to visit Mrs. Stevens,
Friday evening was spent very pleasantly in conversation and singing.
We walked out on the river bank after supper, the sky was bright
with stars which were reflected in the glassy surface of the waters,
while a house on the opposite bank was brightly reflected with all
Saturday Mary and I went out to make some purchases, intending to
go down to Major Bry's afterwards. but we met him and he told us that
his little grandchild had died that morning, and that he was just making
preparations for
We called at Mrs. Wade's, spent a very pleasant hour in her company. And then about twelve o'clock, Mary, Miss Knox and I went to Mrs. Garrett's, where we met Miss Fanny Hardy, and at dinner Col. Bartlett (the Commander of this post who supersedes Gen. Blanchard) and Capt. Thomas.
Miss Hardy is a very pretty young lady, very much like Mrs. Drake
in her manners. In the afternoon we were sitting in the parlour when
Mrs. Garrett's little son came in and whispered to his Mother, “Mr. Wm.
Wadley has come”, I did not hear what he said, but I did hear Mrs.
Garrett when she exclaimed “Miss Wadley, your Pa has come”. I bounded
to the door, all agitation and delight, what was my disappointment when
I saw Willie instead of Father; he said he did not wish to hurry me,
but we would not have time to got home if we did not leave soon, so we
took leave of Mrs. Garrett and returned to Mrs. Stevens' immediately.
Here I found a most beautiful bouquet which Mrs. Wade had sent me.
I bade all goodbye, and left after obtaining a promise from Mary that she would come and spend a week with me as soon as Miss Knox left her. I had passed my week very pleasantly and gaily, but I was glad to be at home again, and see all the loved ones around me.
And Oh how beautiful my dear old hills look to me, all clad in the soft verdure of spring, how dear this Oakland is to me, almost as dear as our old home, from the west windows of the hall the prospect is perfectly beautiful. I ask no other happiness than such a home as this, surrounded by my loved ones, and feeling the pure joy of a heart and conscience at peace with God and the world.
Sunday I was very much fatigued and had a bad head ache in consequence of the late hours and excitement of the past week. Mother, Willie and Eva went to Church, and I spent the greater part of the morning in reading and resting. About one o'clock Johnny Davis and Berk Seale rode up, they remained until the afternoon. Johnny Davis said he was going to Vicksburg on Monday and would take any letters I had to send. I wrote to Father and to Miss Valeria; I had just received a letter from Miss Valeria Saturday morning, I know she will be surprised to get an answer so soon.
I commenced my school duties again yesterday, I am so glad to see that the usual routine of home does not appear distasteful to me after my week of pleasure, I had feared it would.
I was busy all the evening in setting out violets, a little before
sunset Eva and I walked over to Mrs. Dawson's, found Miss Fanny in bed,
she has been very sick. Mrs. Dawson asked me if the country did not
I received a note from Miss Mattie Newcomb yesterday evening, it was full of high sounding phrases and affectionate endearments, she wishes me to come up and spend a week with her, I shall not do so, as I cannot spare another from my school, but I will go up there and spend the day soon.
It is now raining, commenced Sunday evening, and has continued at intervals ever since.—
Yesterday evening Miss Mary, Lory and I went out to ride, on the way back an old gentleman rode up behind us, Miss Mary and I were trying to avoid the mud and he addressed us, telling us there was no danger of miring, we then rode on faster and left him behind, but hearing him speaking to Loring, and thinking it looked impolite to leave him in that way, we checked our horses, he soon came up by my side and said, “Col. Wadley's family, I presume”, I said yes, he then said, “I saw your Father in Jackson the other day,” of course then we were all excitement. I asked him if he was acquainted with my Father, “Oh yes”, he said, “I am Mr. Coleman” “Coleman” I repeated, “Col. Coleman from the swamp?”, he said yes, the same. I had met him before but should never have recognised him again. He said Father was well but “as busy as a bee”, he could not possibly come home now.
Mr. Floyd was camped at Mr. Noble's place and he called to Col. Coleman, we then came on home, met a negro man who usually brings letters from the railroad, asked him if he had brought one “Yes M'am”.
“Who was it from?” “Mr. Wadley I believe, M'am”. I loosed the rein on Mollie's neck and in a few moments was at home and reading the letter. Father said nothing about coming home, I cannot wish him to take all the fatigue of crossing the swamp now, but it is hard for him to be so near us and not to see him.
Mr. Floyd stayed here last night, he and Willie had early breakfast this morning. Willie left for the swamp, Mr. Floyd for Texas. We expect Willie back Friday.
When Willie returned on Friday, he brought us a letter from Father, it was dated Vicksburg, and was written in such haste that we could hardly read it. Father says he cannot possibly come home now, every moment is busily occupied, and it would take so long to cross the swamp. Mr. Dawson brought the letter, he says Father was well. Mr. Dawson there is great risk in crossing the swamp now, of being taken by the Yankees, it was with difficulty he escaped them; he also says that the poor soldiers in Vicksburg are suffering very much for want of food, their bread is little better than pounded corn and their meat they will not eat, it is beef and nothing but gristle. Oh! how my heart bleeds for them, and it might all have been averted if proper steps had been taken a month ago. I feel so utterly powerless to do anything for them, but if I can do nothing else, I can bear without murmuring the great trial, of my Father's absence. I know he is doing all he can for them.
Friday was fast day, we kept fast, and I attended Church in the
morning, no work was done by the field negroes all day. Mother had
a severe sick headache Friday and Saturday. Yesterday it changed
Saturday night we had a very high wind, which blew down many
trees, there were three large trees, one oak, two hickory blown
It has been more than a week since I wrote any here, and yet the week has been full of events to me, we have had school only a few days out of the seven, for I have either been visiting or receiving company a great part of the time.
Tuesday I attended a little sociable at Mrs. Dawson's, it was very
pleasant indeed, we passed the evening in dancing, music and conversation,
the young ladies of our circle were all there with quite a
number of gentlemen for these times, there were Lieuts. Flournoy, Conrad,
and Holland, Captains Martin and O'Ruke, and Dr's Cummings and Compton,
besides Adam Young and Willie.
Wednesday we all took a walk down to the Bayou, spent an hour or two sitting under the shade of a beautiful Beech tree or rambling through the surrounding woods, and returned home in time for dinner. Then the same afternoon we rode in to Mrs. Seale's and came bank by moonlight.
Thursday, I believe, was spent quietly at home, in the afternoon Julia Compton came over and remained all night. Mother spent the day in Monroe.
Friday morning Miss Mary and Maggie Compton and Carrie Young and Adam came over, Miss Mary and Maggie had that morning walked down from their place, after staying several hours they all, Julia included, went over to Mrs. Dawson's. In the evening I was not at all well, and lay down several hours.
Saturday Miss Mary and I were busy nearly all day, having upstairs swept and dusted, and putting up shades and arranging the furniture in the hall, which we shall use as a summer parlour.
Mrs. Compton had a party of young ladies and gentlemen at her house in the evenings, and invited me very cordially, but I had several reasons for declining, one was that I was not well enough to go.
I forgot to say that Willie left us Thursday for a business journey into the back parishes.
Monday I spent the day with a whole party of young ladies at Mrs. Seale's, the Misses Dawson, the Misses Scott, the Misses Frazier, and Miss Slack were there, besides Mrs. Seale, Mrs. Norris and Lucy, in spite of all this company there seemed to be a pretty general ennui.
Monday night I was surprised and waked out of my sleep about half past ten or eleven o'clock by some one calling at the front door. I sat up in bed, half asleep and a little frightened, and called out Who's there? “A traveller” “What do you want” “I want to stay all night” Mother said “tell him no”. I called back “You can't stay, it is too late” “But I will stay”, those words were rather alarming, but fortunate for my presence of mind Mother recognised Willie's voice. I then said “Oh, Willie, I know it is you, come in”. We were very much surprised to see him so soon, he said he could not buy anything, government agents had advertised for every thing, and he thought it was wrong to take it from the soldiers who need it so much, even if he could get it.
Mary Stevens and Miss Knox spent the day with me yesterday, we had
a very pleasant day indeed. Mary and I called at Mrs. Dawson's, the
young ladies were at home, we found Miss Mary and Maggie Compton there,
Mother received a letter from Father last Monday, he was just on the eve of leaving for Virginia, said he would not reach Richmond before the first of May, as he had a great deal of business on the road, he said he would try and come home about the first of June, if the Yankees were away from the swamp then. It is almost impossible to cross to Vicksburg now, the Yankees have been and are still making “demonstrations” around Richmond Madison Parish.
Father says he has been trying to get time to write to me, but has
not been able to do so yet, I have not expected it, but Father is so
kind, so
I must now close this long journal, for we go into school again this morning, and I want to read some before I go.
Have been expecting Mary Stevens out all the week, but she did not come and wrote me today that she could not come next week as she was to have company.
I have been feeling weak and sad all the time for the last few days, suppose my sadness arises partly from the state of my health, without being sick at all I find my health is less robust than it has been for a year, no wonder.
I have received letters from several friends during the week, one
from Mary Waters this evening, she says that Miss Ginnie has been in
New Orleans for the last four months, that they have only heard from
her once, she writes that Banks is very different from Butler, encourages
every one to express their
Willie saw Johnny Davis today, he says Mr. Myrick is at Natchez, sick, is threatened with typhoid fever. I hope he will not have it, he is just on the eve of marriage to a young lady in the swamp.
We have just received a letter from Father, he was at Augusta, was quite well, and about to leave for Richmond.
Yesterday evening Carrie Young, Virginia Dawson and I took a ride, we met Mr. Kimball a few miles from Trenton, and Carrie asked him to ride with us, he did so. Virginia and I managed it so that they should ride together all the time, except a little way from Steep Bayou, coming home, when Virginia and Carrie sang, and I rode along with Mr. K. found him quite agreeable and intelligent in conversation.
Eva, Lory and I rode again this morning, I have commenced my morning rides again, fancy I can almost feel the improvement in my strength already.
Willie and Mr. Axley went down in the swamp yesterday, took two negroes with them to get some corn, there was no other way of getting it, and so Willie ventured, though it is rather near the Yankees, we expect them back Monday or Wednesday.
Yesterday John was very sick, we sent for the doctor, he said had inflammation of the bronchial tubes, he is much better today, has been running about the house all day.
Just a month since my last entry in my old book! What a busy month it has been, I cannot record all that has happened but will give a few items.
About the 20th. of last month, Mrs. Stone (a lady from the swamp)
came to Mother to get board for herself and family for a week; they had
escaped from the swamp in haste and at night, lost all their clothing,
except what was contained in one small trunk, and abandoned their house
and furniture entirely to the Yankees and negroes. Mother was very reluctant
to take them, but they urged it and she could not refuse persons
in their situation, so they came, Mrs. Stone, Miss Kate, Rebecca and
Jimmy and Johnny, they are a very pleasant family, have no small children Rebecca is eleven years old and a very nice, good little girl. Mrs. Stone
has been here very little of the time, and Johnny and Jimmy have been away
a great deal. Miss Kate is a very sweet young lady, so unaffected and
agreeable. Mary Stevens came out and spent a week with me last month as
she promised, it was a delightful week to me, that is (as pleasant as
anything of that kind is, now when there is a continual trouble upon us
all). Monday evening we were all looking at Gen'l Walker's division which
was passing, and had just returned from the grove, when a gentleman rode
up and inquired if we could accommodate Mrs. Maclay, wife of the adjutant inspector general, he said the Gen. was at Dr. Young's but they could not
take Mrs. Maclay, Mother said yes and they soon drove up (Mrs. Maclay and
his little girl Nannie). She travels all around with her husband, has an
Mrs. Stone and Jimmy are in Delhi, getting some negroes from their
plantation. Willie has been as busy as possible for the past week arranging
to have the railroad negroes brought over this side of the river, they
are here now, about seventy. Poor Willie is getting quite pale and thin
again, I hope all this fatigue will not make him sick again. The weather
is quite cool for this season of the year, it is warm at Mid day but the
mornings and evenings are almost cold.
We have three more “lodgers” now, really our house seems quite
elastic, we thought it full to overflowing when Mrs. Stone came, but now
we accommodate these ladies very well. Willie gave up his room and took
an unfinished one on the north side of the house. Mother would not have
taken these ladles but the circumstances of their case were so sad she
could not refuse. Mrs. Barr and her daughter Mrs. Morancy are both widows.
Mrs. Morancy was only a wife eighteen months, and her husband died recently,
she has a little baby eight or nine months old. Mrs. Barr has lost two
grown sons within the last two years, was obliged to leave her plantation,
and lost a great deal, her house with all her furniture was burnt by her
negroes a few days after she left it, her family now consists of her widowed daughter, a young lady daughter, Miss Julia, and Mr. Bowmar Barr and wife;
lodgers,” they are all such pleasant people.
Mrs. Barr seems to be a very sweet lady,—her troubles, though many,
have not soured her disposition at all.
Here is a beautiful little poem, a translation from the
I find many tastes and feelings in common with Mrs. Morancy, and
like her very much, I feel so irresistably drawn towards her, I suppose
it is because she has suffered so much, and from what I can judge has
been strengthened and purified by suffering; nothing develops and
June is here at last, long looked for as it has been, but Father has
While such great and momentous scenes are enacted so near us, I feel
hushed in awe and anxiously wait for the eventful future. God grant that
we may be successful, I believe we are in the right, yet who can know the inscrutable designs of His in whose sight a thousand years are as one day
and as a watch in the night when it is past. I am constantly occupied, occupation is life to me, and I find no lack of it, visiting or receiving
visits
Miss Kate, Willie and I attended a fish fry on Crew lake yesterday,
the party was very small, only Mrs. Willson's family, Mary Stevens, and
Miss Sarah Garrett and Mrs. Proctor, with a few gentlemen; we rose at half past two, rode into town, and met the rest of the party at the cars at
about five o'clock, we spent the morning very pleasantly in the woods,
fishing, walking and talking, Mrs. Proctor afforded me a great deal of amusement, she is one of the gay widows whom one meets with so often in
books; has a large bunch of small curls on each side of her face, and a
net trimmed with bugles, waving behind, a complexion which is a happy
mingling of brown and flushy red, a hooked nose, retreating forehead, and
a wide mouth always open and showing very good teeth, her head dress yesterday
was a black hat trimmed with blue ribbons, over which was thrown a
black lace veil which never descended to cover her face; she has a
nervously lively air, talks in a high key and shakes her curls, throws back
her head, and laughs at almost every word spoken either by herself or another;
her great affectation of youth ill accords with the number of wrinkles on
Today I am to commence a regular system in the division of my time,
We have had no rain yet, and need it dreadfully, the dust is stifling and if we do not have rain this week, our prospect for corn will be ruined; it is very warm now too, real summer weather such as I like if it only were not so dry.
At length it has come, the long desired, welcome rain, all day long
it has been alternately shower and sunshine, and just now it was raining,
really raining, oh! how delightful, to sit in my room all alone with my
book, hearing not a sound except the quick fall of the rain, and looking
out upon the freshening landscape smiling through its misty veil. Bless
God for the rain, the life giving, soul refreshing rain, and now though the drops fall more slowly clouds are over the sky and still “from cloud to
cloud returns the solemn hymn,” in the west a beautiful golden light shines through the trees and rises higher and higher in the sky. What a refreshing smell arising from the grateful earth as it eagerly drinks in the much
needed rain. When looking on such a scene, and breathing such air, I unconsciously recall the scripture comparing the rain's coming to the
thirsty earth with the mercy of God coming to the sinner's heart.
Oh! how shall I write the joyful event of this evening, Father has
Mrs. Stone and her family left for Texas on Wednesday, it seems strange
We all went out on the pay train with Father yesterday, had a very
pleasant ride to Delhi and back again. Delhi is full of soldiers, but they
I have neglected my journal for so long that I do not know now where
to begin, there is so much to write. A day or two after Mrs. Stone left,
we had an application to board some one—even the fashionable Mrs. Amos
or rather the rich Mrs. Amos and daughter and two servants. Mother refused
of course, they are staying with Mrs. Dawson, a friend, and they have a
place in Jackson parish, and are not distressed in any way. Our intercourse
with them has not been very pleasant. The first time I saw Miss Amos was
the morning she called here with her Mother to get board, I thought her agreeable and sensible, when I called on her, as usual, I was less pleased;
she has not returned my call and I suppose will not do so. Monday night
I was invited to spend the evening there, at first I wrote a note declining,
The wife and daughter of Captain Jesse Smith were here yesterday and
the night before, they left this morning. Appear honest, good and frank
hearted people, but Oh so fat, Miss Smith weighs two hundred and fifty
pounds, and is only seventeen! she is really immense, and it is a actual
fat too, I pity the poor (?) girl, she feels it too, they invited me very cordially to come up and pay them a visit, perhaps I may; they are very comfortably established with fine orchards, garden and everything around
them, but still there is a certain magnetic repulsion which makes me shrink
from the thought of spending my time in their company; this shrinking from anything coarse or inelegant in mind or manners is so strong in me that I
don't think I can ever overcome it, I have too great a love for elegant
We have not had any school for the past two weeks, first on account
of Father's return, and last week because we expected Mrs. Barr to leave
daily and Mother said I had better not have school, but I shall endeavour
to commence next Monday. Father has been spending every other day for more
than a week in the blacksmith shop, one day he is president of the road,
the next takes up his old familiar trade, he is repairing the wagons and
the carriage, getting everything ready in case we should have to move. We
I really had forgotten, or rather had not thought, that this was the eventful fourth until I wrote the date of this entry; alas we have no time now to celebrate the birthday of a liberty which we had nearly lost and are now struggling so hard to maintain. I have heard nothing of any celebration today, we have little heart for it now, little heart for any joy even the purest, which brings so powerfully to our minds the glorious past but is at the time associated with thoughts of our bitterest foes.
Mr. Scott returned day before yesterday, he was taken sick again
and looked almost as badly as when he first came. But I must note the extraordinary event which took place yesterday. About half past twelve o'clock we were all sitting down quietly in the hall sewing, braiding palmetto, busy
in a great many ways, in fact we were so busy talking and working that we
did not as usual hear the gate latch or the rolling of wheels until Loring
ran up saying “here's an ambulance, here's the staff!” We were indeed surprised,
they came up so suddenly that we had no time to dress at all. Mother
Major Mason too!” as she advanced to receive him, he was accompanied by Capt. Gault and Capt. French, the last a nephew of my favorite
the Major, I was very sorry he had not come instead of the nephew.
Of course Mother, the housekeeper, thought at once of her dinner, expecting
of course they would remain, under this mistaken idea she came out into
the hall when they had been there about half an hour and asked “if the
gentlemen would not like to wash their faces after their dusty ride” the
poor gentlemen were much embarrassed, I dare say they thought their faces
were dirty. Major Mason recovered himself with his usual quickness, and
jumping up said in a rather flurried manner “thank you ma'am, as far as I
am concerned it would give me a great deal of pleasure,” poor Capt. Gault thought he must follow, in his excitement be rose, hemmed and blushed,
looked first at Major Mason and then at Mother, and then swung off to the
room behind Maj. M. and Capt. French. It was really a most amusing thing,
to think they should have dressed up in their best, Maj. Mason especially
in clean, starched and trimmed shirt, buttoned with costly and beautiful
studs, his hair brushed just so, and particularly parted behind, fine ring
on his finger, and his whole person redolent of perfumes, and withal a face cleansed or every spec, and in this toilet come to call on the ladles and indulging in a fine flow of eloquence, to be asked unceremoniously to wash
his face, no wonder he was surprised out of his usual elegant self possession,
but Mother was perfectly innocent, his toilet was lost on her, she asked
him to wash his face as if he had been a common soldier. I dare say they
had a good laugh when they reached the cool seclusion of my room, my room
too, only think of it. I was really provoked when I saw them filing in. Notwithstanding this little mistake, their visit was very pleasant; a few minutes before dinner was announced they rose to go, but we asked them to
remain to dinner and they very readily consented, and remained some time
after. I enjoyed their visit a good deal particularly as it was quite a
surprise and a very unusual thing too, novelty gives zest to anything. I
was really surprised as well as gratified during their visit by a little
episode which displayed Capt. Gault's character in a more favourable light
than I had before regarded it, this was as follows, we were speaking of the wounded soldiers in Monroe and their desperate condition, deprived as some
are, of both hands or both legs, I said I had rather die than live thus,
yes he said, if mortal hopes and pleasures were only to be consulted, but
the question would always rise what must come after death. So entirely unexpected was this from one whose character I had conceived to be so
dissolute and thoughtless as his, that I could scarcely answer, he went on to say that it was a feeling so deeply implanted in a man's heart by his
Mother that he could never forget it, that it was the one remembrance of
a Mother's teaching which he had never cast off, but which often returned
to his, and the more bitterly as he had no doubt what his final destination would be, this last was said in a light tone as if ashamed of his former seriousness, but when he brushed his hand over his eyes and forehead I
It makes me sad to think of the situation of our country, particularly
of poor Louisiana at this time. There seems too be no law or order on this
side the Mississippi, all is in confusion. Father is now involved in a controversy between civil law and military tyranny. A week or two ago, Capt. Oliver, the indispensable articles were
carried, and during the day seven messengers were sent to Mr. McGuire to
prevail on him to receive the railroad again, he told them that as they
had no right to take it, so they had no right to deliver it to him, but
finally said that if it was abandoned he might take possession, it was immediately abandoned. Father instituted a legal process against the seizure which has no warrant in either civil or military law. No man is willing
to do more for his country, or to sacrifice more for it than my Father, but
no man is more firm in resisting tyranny or maintaining those rights which
make our country dear. Last week the trains had gone to Delhi to bring
Walker's division to Monroe, but on receiving a contradictory order from
General Smith they were to disembark. Col. Randall, commanding a brigade
in the division, sent a peremptory order to the conductor to back down,
he replied that would do so as soon as the train was ready, but the engineer said in a low tone, not meant for the ears of the official, “We don't obey
Gen'l Randall here, if he had requested us to back down we would have done
it,” this idle speech was reported to Gen'l Randall and he had McKinney
put in irons and lodged in the jail, saying that he should remain there for
the rest of the war. Was not this an outrage on liberty? I heard however
that Gen'l Walker had ordered the man to be released but yesterday he was
still in jail, and Mr. Ray had gone down to compel his release as an officer
Mrs. Noble and Annie paid us a visit yesterday, they stayed all night and left this morning, Annie is growing to be quite a pretty girl.
Last night twenty soldiers, recruits from Texas to Walker's division,
camped at our gate, they came up to borrow cooking utensils. Mrs. Bowmar
Barr was playing on the piano quite late, and three of them came up to
hear some music! it was such a good trait in their characters, I thought.
Like all the soldiers we have ever met they seem well behaved. We hear bad
news from Vicksburg, some say that it has fallen, some that it is about to
fall, I can only hope and trust; Oh God, desert us not in this our extremity! All is dark and uncertain, we cannot look into the gloomy future even a
day. Willie and his wagons leave for Shreveport today, they are going for
coffee and also to take some wheat to mill at Minden, not far this side of Shreveport. Loring begged so hard to go with Willie that Mother consented,
he seems to anticipate a great deal of pleasure on the road, it is a new
thing to him. Father has gone into Monroe today, but will be in the blacksmith's shop tomorrow, he keeps working steadily, putting all the vehicles
in running order, in case we should have to become refugees in our turn.—
Mrs. Compton and Maggie paid us a visit yesterday afternoon, Julia was out riding and stopped to see me, I really envied her when I saw her galloping
by, I have not mounted Mollie for a month or more, her back is healed up
tame.
Willie and Loring left for Shreveport Tuesday, we miss them very much indeed, it seems like a week since they left, it is hard to bid anyone goodbye in these times. Mrs. Barr, Mrs. Morancy and Miss Julia left us yesterday morning to visit Mrs. Mahier, a friend of theirs in Jackson parish, they expect to return Saturday, our family is very small now and the house feels lonesome. Mr. Scott is still here, he improves but slowly. We were very busy yesterday finishing an organdie dress which Miss Kate Stone gave me, it looks very pretty and is very becoming to me. There were some tableaux and charades last night in town, given by the young ladies for the benefit of the hospital, Mrs. Stevens invited Miss Mary and I to stay all night at her house, but we had no way to go. Father is busy working at the carriage again today, he has nearly finished it.
Vicksburg has fallen, Vicksburg, our hope and pride! Oh, it is
terrible; we would not believe it until today, but now it seems certain.
Oh God, have mercy upon us, have mercy upon us, all is dark, all hearts are sad, this is the
worst blow we have had. We hear that it was surrendered on Saturday morning
at ten o'clock, the fourth of July, hereafter a day of mourning and
humiliation to us, of redoubled exultation to our hated enemies. Oh, it is
A soldier is here from Vicksburg, left there on parole on the eighth, says the city surrendered for want of provisions, a mule was killed for meat to his knowledge, he says. Oh I am bowed to the dust with humiliation when I think of it. My God, my God why hast thou forsaken us, I cannot be resigned to thy will in this, it is too hard, our pride, our bulwark is gone, this is the end of our confidence and boasting. And it is the fault of our own Generals, well may every true patriot execrate the name of Pemberton. The Yankees are advancing on Delhi, our forces are preparing to fight them. Oh for victory. All is dark, I cannot look ahead. I shudder to think of the future. Should the Confederacy fall I feel I can never know joy again, but it cannot, must not fall, we fight for honour, liberty, life itself, we shall yet redeem our name, our former glorious name. Only this morning the calm brightness of the Sabbath invigorated my saddened soul. I trusted in God and I will yet trust in him from whom cometh my salvation.
Mrs. Barr and family returned Monday morning, they found Eva sick with
Georgie, my darling, was taken yesterday evening with the diptheria,
we sent immediately for the doctor but he could not come till late, and as Georgie was asleep and had no fever he would not disturb him to look at
his throat, I hope he will come early this morning; Father was not at all
well yesterday, retired before supper. We had a joyful surprise yesterday
in the return of Willie and Loring, it was very unexpected indeed,
Willie returned immediately from Shreveport, he could not get any coffee
except at six dollars a pound by the sack, they would not sell a smaller quantity, so he did not get any, not knowing what a panic might be in
Monroe by the time he returned. Major
Georgie's throat was very much inflamed but proved not to be the diptheria, he is as well as usual now. The doctor is here this morning at work at Jim's throat; he says it is not necessary to cauterize Eva's throat again, she is fast getting well, sat up all day yesterday, and is up and dressed this morning, but she looks badly and is still careful of her diet. We took a ride in the carriage Saturday evening, principally to give Eva an airing, it was delightful riding, as we returned home Miss Carrie Young and Capt. Gault, Virginia Dawson and Capt. Smith on horseback overtook us, we did not see the last couple, but Carrie and her cavalier seemed enjoying themselves highly. Father had a fever yesterday and sent for the doctor, but he was sick and could not come, this morning he is up though feeling badly, and Mother gave him a dose of medicine before the doctor came.
The troops from the convalescent camp passed here yesterday, there were
Today I have had once more the pleasure of hearing the service and an excellent sermon from the lips of an episcopal minister, Mr. Lawson of Bastrop. Mrs. Dortch told us last week that he was to preach at Monroe today, and I was of course anxious to go. Miss Mary, Eva, Willie, Loring and I went in, it was exceedingly dusty and very warm, but I was amply repaid for the long and wearisome ride for the pleasure I had in Church, it is the first time in more than two years since I have been in any Church but this one here, and my emotion amounted almost to pain as the impressive service commenced and the music of the melodeon, how sweet and solemn! The text was, “What is man that thou art mindful of him, and the son of man that thou visiteth him,” and well was it treated. Oh, how I felt my own nothingness, my selfishness and vanity while I listened, and more than all these I felt the grace and mercy of God, grace of which I am so unworthy. I caught a very bad cold on Friday, and feared I should not be well enough to go, but this morning when I rose I was surprised and thankful to find my head free from pain and my cold almost gone.
Rose was taken with the diptheria yesterday, I hope she will not have it badly, she is very patient, a great contrast to Jim, who will not allow any thing to be done for him except by force, he is very sick and very sullen, he is extremely reduced, looks dreadfully. John is not at all well, he either has a very bad cold or some kind of cough.
Mr. Lawson said today that the hand of God was above this dark war
cloud hovering over us, and that it is he and not man who
This morning the two wagons left for Marshall, one loaded with my
piano and the books and the other with railroad things. Mr. Burks, a
railroad overseer went with them, Father will follow in a day or two, to
find some place of deposit for the things. I had hoped never to have seen
them moved again, but all these hopes are now dashed to the ground, the
books were never put upon the shelves intended for them. All is so uncertain, where will they be unpacked? If Father carries out his scheme of sending
us all over to Germany we shall not have a home soon again, this idea of
going to Germany is terrible to me, to be separated from Father and Willie
and from Valeria, I am separated from her now, it is true, but not by
oceans. Oh, if I could only see her before we leave home, or if I could
Jenny Morancy is very sick, I hope she may be spared to her afflicted Mother.
Poor little Jim died this evening, without pain and almost imperceptibly the spirit passed to Him who gave it, his body lies still and cold in the room where he suffered, and the singing of the watchers now sounds solemnly there, how closely are life and death bound together, death is ever near, the thought fills me with no alarm for myself, but for those so near to me it is dreadful. How much we feel our own littleness when we see the breath dying out of the body, but now so full of life, no man can save his brother, here mortal love and anguish are of no avail.
Father left for Marshall this morning, went in a sort of jersey
belonging to the railroad, and took Uncle Jim to drive him, we miss Father
so much, and he will be gone two weeks. Had a pleasant rain today and this evening Tabitha Scarborough, Willie and I had a delightful ride, went up
on the hill near Mrs. Compton's, the scene from there was beautiful, very beautiful and tranquil in the light of the setting sun.
I am alone this evening, all have gone down to Mrs. Barr's except Eva
and John and they are in the garden. I feel very nervous this evening as
if something were about to happen, or perhaps it is what has happened that
intimidated) by its glitter seemed to throw the light of the charnel of the hated Massachusetts. I uttered a cry of joy, of relief, I
felt a load lifted from my heart, perfect peace was there instead of bitterness,
oh the joy of that moment, new forms the stars took, familiar names,
but the feeling of this agony and joy has obliterated the others in my mind,
but at last the stars sunk and faded, none remained but the upper one, which took again its familiar form. But now a new and wondrous sight prepared
itself, in the east arose a sun whose beams of crimson and gold and amber
light shot high up the firmament, it was most glorious and only died away
to make room for another smaller but not fainter. I drew in my breath for
awe and delight, but at last these marvellous visions past away, it was near dawn, the whole yard was crowded with negroes gazing awestruck, but they
began to disperse, a well known form drove up, it was that of Mr. Kern my Grandmother's pastor in Savannah, who has been since three years in “the
silent land”. Without speaking I put my arm in his and walking into the
house, for I had descended from the hall, I spoke to him of the marvellous
sight which he also had witnessed. I was still talking to him when Rose
came to wake me; only half aroused I said Rose, did you see the stars last night, she said “no, ma'am” was it a dream, I thought, no, she could not
have seen them, and yet it is strange. I said “I cannot get up yet, I
have been up all night.” I know not what she thought of my strange words.
When I rose I walked to my shelf, took down my french dictionary and there
found
Since I wrote last I have been very busy, and have a great deal to write now though only a week has passed. Tuesday Miss Mary and I had been down to Mrs. Barr's, Mother had a headache and we returned a little after sunset, what was our surprise on entering her room to find Father sitting there, it was indeed a joyful surprise for we had not expected him before Friday at the earliest, he says he had quite an agreeable journey, he looks improved. I have been feeling very badly for the past week, for three days especially I have scarcely been able to sit up, I have a boil which pains me exceedingly, and have been half lying down all day, last night I had quite a nervous fever. But to my record—
Mrs. Mays came up and spent the day with us Saturday. In the evening
Willie and I and Eva took a delightful ride down to Mrs. Barr's. Tabitha Scarborough was to have gone with us, but Julia Willson came over and was hastily preparing to go to Kentucky to stay with her sister, we rode down
I have another hat on hand, one for Mrs. Wynne's little boy, she
asked me at Church one day if I would make one for him and she would pay
me any price I asked! I told her if she would send me the palmetto I would
him a present of the making, I commenced it Monday and am trying to finish
it this week, though I have felt so ill that it is something of an effort.
I have my hands full of work now. So many books to read. I finished “The
Mill on the Floss,” last week, returned it and Tabitha sent me Bayard Taylor's “Europe seen with knapsack and staff” and “Dr. Antonio.” The first we are
reading aloud, the second I have not yet commenced. Besides these I have Lamartine's works, and two little stories “Jacques Cour” and “Edouard de Tremont” from Mrs. McGuire. I have not commenced the two latter but have
been revelling in the “Voyage in Orient” which I have half finished, I
think it is beautiful. I am going to love Lamartine and to wish ardently
that I had known him, his thoughts are so elevated, so pure, and there is
a sentiment of such deep religion in everything he says, such deep pure sentiment as I had thought very few of the french poet philosophers ever
felt, there is nothing more ennobling to men than this. I love poetry, and
there is none more beautiful than the prose poetry of Lamartine in which
he interprets the Holy land, it is true I could prefer it English, to me
there is something far more noble in our stately English tongue than in
the lighter, more profuse french. Oh shall I ever see these lands, I know
not, and yet something seems to tell me I shall yet stand under the solemn
must go to work. I must not forget that with me
“passion too often mingles with zeal,” this thought is from Thomas a Kempis.
I have often felt it, never been able to express it.
I found Mrs. Morancy much better yesterday, Jenny was not well.
Just a week since my last entry, a week spent for the greater part in
visiting. I consider this a duty as well as everything else, and a duty
very difficult to perform well, at least I am too apt either to neglect it altogether, or else to neglect other things in consequence of it, today I
have felt disinclined for any of my customary employments, partly from
indolence, principally from an ill, weary feeling that oppresses me very much
of late. Friday afternoon Mother, Father and I went into Monroe, Mother
and I to pay some visits, just as I was putting on my hat the two Miss
Grahams and Miss Hannah Bly drove up, they readily excused, we did not feel
as if we could relinquish our visit when we were all ready and the carriage
at the door, we went to Mrs. Calderwood's, found no one at home but Miss
Laura Barnes who was on a visit there, and had a very pleasant hour or two
with her, and some delicious pears and apples. We also went to see Mrs.
very pleasant lady, but
small and very plain. Had a delightful drive home with the rich sunset
before us; I never can drive westward without thinking of our future,
which seems bound to this western land. Saturday we went up to Mrs.
Compton's, saw the young ladies and Miss Stacy, it seemed pleasant and
familiar to me to be there and yet that parlour brought up a quick sharp
pang which I so often feel, I thought of one lost forever.
I regretted while we sat in silence waiting for the young ladies, I truly regretted our pleasant familiar intercourse of last winter, now so suspended if not entirely broken. I don't think I have been in fault, though perhaps I have unconsciously given offence. John Davis came out Saturday to make arrangements for a journey to Miss. He said on his last journey he passed within a quarter of a mile of where Mr. Ridgill used to live, he heard they had moved, I suppose it is true for Miss Valeria told me in her last letter that they would go if Vicksburg fell. Oh unhappy Vicksburg, once our pride, now—
I had just written a long letter a few days before but could not resist
writing again to tell Valeria to direct my letters care of Mr. Boulineau,
while writing I thought of a plan less foolish, than that of directing to Hazelhurst, it was to enclose my letter under cover to Miss Harrison, Summerfield, Ala. a friend of whom I have often heard Valeria speak, thinking perhaps she might know where they lived. I do long for a letter in that
beloved handwriting once more. Oh how I am blessed in this dear friend,
though parted from her I think of her as one not absent. John Davis took
a chill here Saturday and remained till Monday morning, he will not leave
so weak, I am always
failing. But I must go on; this evening I had expected to visit Miss Creath
only dress fresh, so I put the visit off for more favourable weather,
though I am disappointed. I wanted to finish my visiting this week and
have the next quiet and undisturbed. Carrie Young was over here yesterday afternoon. Miss Mat Newcomb and her sister spent a few days with Carrie
last week, were coming over here but their sister, Mrs. McClendon was
thrown out of a buggy and seriously injured and they had to shorten their
visit, we had a beautiful Cactus bloom Tuesday, I sent it over to Miss Mat,
but she was gone. I must close this journal, I have a little time before
dark, but must devote it to copying some lines Mrs. Morancy lent me a long
time ago, and which have been waiting in my desk for a little leisure,
they are in manuscript by Mrs. Warfield, authoress of “the household of Bouverie,” and a cousin of Mrs. Morancy's.
About three quarters of an hour ago Willie, Miss Mary and I were
sitting in our room, I reading, the others playing checkers, Eva was in
bed with a slight fever, Father had retired and Mother was about to do so.
At once I heard a man's step on the hall
The first thing we did was to give Mr. Davis some supper. Father
rose and dressed himself to go to Monroe, & Willie old Mr. Burke (the
railroad overseer) went out to see about the team. Poor Eva was crying
before but felt worse now. So quickly was everything done that they are
all off now, Father and Mr. Davis in the buggy, Mr. Burke perfectly free from fear, I feel a sort of
Eva is quite sick this morning, her fever lasted all night, the
doctor has just left, did not think it anything serious; Emmeline has the diptheria but not at all badly, I hope she will get over it easily, we
could not do without her now. Father returned about twelve o'clock last
night, said everything was quiet in town and he heard nothing more; he
went in immediately after breakfast, said he would try and be back to
dinner, we are expecting to hear something when he arrives; he left this
morning in a rather skeptical mood; but the doctor says that the Yankees
really are coming, he saw Mr. Oliver, who was coming from town in haste
and packing up to leave. We cannot go, our wagons are none of them ready,
I say none, one may be but that is not enough to move us. It is as cold,
perhaps colder, today than yesterday, a fire is quite comfortable though
we have none, it is just like fall weather, so unseasonable that I am
afraid it will produce a good deal of sickness. How strange that I can
write upon such trifling subjects when maybe the Yankees are so near; but
I feel perfectly calm, just as I always do when I think there is something
great to happen or happening to me, a stillness, firmness and activity which
I so often so generally lack.
I do not know where or how to begin, all is movement, anxiety, expectation.
our way, but it is impossible for us
to go now. Father says if it were not for Eva he might attempt to go, but
as it is we cannot stir. Willie wants to take away the negroes and stock,
I don't know whether he will or not. Poor Father, he says that for the
first time in his life he don't know what to do, he was in Monroe yesterday
all the morning, seeing to the railroad things, and could not sleep last
night from his thoughts.
Prince, Emmeline's husband came to Father last night begging him to
We have just finished dinner and I have resumed my watch by Eva's side,
she is—as I was about to add—sleeping quietly, she waked, and I
have been attending to her for some time, she is now sleeping again. She
has been free from fever for four or five hours and has slept nearly all
that time but complains of great weakness when she wakes, of course nothing
else could be expected when her fever has not left her before since Tuesday
night and she has taken little nourishment. Father did not return till ten
last night, found the poor officer waiting for him, but all to no purpose
for Father had the wagons (which were several miles on their way) turned
back, said he could not allow them to go in that way. He confirmed what
very much to hear the least talking and we try
to keep as still as possible, she has had no nervous
About twelve o'clock this morning Mr. McCormick came out from Monroe
and told us that the Yankees had gone, they came into Monroe about eleven o'clock yesterday morning and went away about seven this morning, taking
with them a number of negroes, mules and some wagons. We had pickets out
on the roads leading from Monroe, within a mile of this place, and though anybody was allowed to come out no one could go in, except by taking the
bushes, this was the plan Mr. McCormick intended to pursue in returning,
and Dr. Whyte was obliged to do the same. We were so glad to hear the welcome
news, though we suspect that the retiring of the Yankees may be only
a feint to draw our soldiers back and entrap them; but father says he thinks this was only a kind of so glad I did not see any of them. Father sent Prince for Willie today, to tell him to leave the negroes with
Mr. Burke and come back with the carriage. We expect him tonight perhaps,
he left about dusk last night, I never felt as I did when he left. Every
thing seemed quiet, it was so this morning and is tonight, I felt an
free choice, they might have
done so in reality, Father would not have hindered them, but they every one chose to go with Willie. Some were not sincere, for Mr. McCormick says
that Mr. Duvall is sure he saw one of them, he thinks several, with the
Yankees this morning when they left. I was passing through the hall yesterday
morning and overheard one of the railroad negroes talking to Father,
something was said about going to the Yankees, “No, Mars William,” Abe said,
“I come from Georgia and you did too and I calculate to die by you.”
Eva was better this morning, but has not slept any today and is worse
this evening, she complains of great prostration, difficulty of breathing
and a pain in her side, has very little fever, the doctor came after dinner, prescribed Quinine through the evening and night at short intervals, he
said that if she was not better tomorrow she must have more medicine, poor
child she has now been sick four days and nights, one side is so sore from
the applications of plasters that she cannot lie on it. I have been with
her all day until since I have been writing this, it is now so dark I must
put up my writing. We have three soldiers for supper and a shelter,
we can give them no bed but blankets. Mr. Taylor was taken sick this evening,
I hope he may soon recover for his sake and ours, I am very anxious
to have the wagons fitted up ready to move.——
I believe it is decided at last, in two weeks, God willing, we are
to start—not to Texas—to Georgia. Two weeks, only two weeks. That
we are to go to Georgia takes not from the sting of this bitter parting
for me. I have so many things to do in this short time that very little
leisure will be left for writing, I am now taking a few minutes before breakfast. Eva was a great deal better yesterday and is this morning. I
hope she may now gain a little, not go back and advance alternately as she
has been doing. Mrs. Seale and Mrs. Putnam spent the day here yesterday,
I saw but little of them as I was with Eva most of the time. Willie returned about eleven o'clock Saturday night, said he had gotten along very
well, that the negroes were, as he expressed it, the jolliest set that
ever travelled, picking the banjo and dancing every time they stopped,
they will be still more jolly at the prospect of going to Georgia. Dr.
Whyte told us of an outrage perpetrated by the Yankees on Bayou de Sicard,
they went to Mr. Fithiol's house, demanded some gold that he had, and
when he said that it was out of his power to got it, they put five pistols
to his head, and commanded him to produce, he still denied, and they put
a pistol to his wife's head, compelled her to get up, in her night dress,
light the house all over, unlock all her trunks and show them throughout
the house, when they still could not find the money they threatened to burn
the house. Mrs. Fithiol drew aside the bed curtains and shoved them her children, “What!” she said, “Would you burn down the house over four little children” “Children are very common things nowadays, we see them every
day” was the brutal reply. They did not burn the house however, but took
politic) and that few, if any, other
such outrages were committed. It is hard for me to admit that they are
polite.
Eva is improving, had no fever yesterday or today, we hope she can
sit up a little tomorrow. We are all very busy preparing to leave, Father
has been blacksmithing for the last two days as Mr. Taylor's attack proved
quite serious, and we are anxious to leave at the earliest possible moment;
sometimes I feel as if I cannot wait the prescribed ten days, for what may
not happen before then? I am filled with forebodings. This country on
this side the Mississippi is almost in a state of anarchy. We are so afraid
that Willie may be conscripted before we can get off, he intends to join
the army in Virginia as soon as possible but to have him conscripted and
in the army here would be dreadful. Mr. Frank Garrett and Capt. Wiltz
stayed here last night. Capt. Wiltz says that on Thanksgiving, a few days
ago, many of the officers at Shreveport and a great many citizens went to
Church, when behold! a guard surrounded the building and arrested every
man as he came out! What an outrage to humanity! such we must think,
though perpetrated in our own country. They were in search of conscripts.
Every one is taken up now, in a few days the conscript officers may come
here, Oh it is terrible to think of. Father is going to send Willie off
in a day or two on a reconnoitering expedition into the swamp. We will leave
A convention has just been held at Marshall, Texas, of the Governors of Texas, Louisiana, Arkansas and Missouri, the judges of the supreme court, the members of Legislature and the Generals—all the generals on this side except Magruder and one other. In this convention they have adopted some very singular resolutions, which virtually amount to the severance of these four states from the Government at Richmond. General Kirby Smith has extraordinary powers bestowed on him, powers equal to those of the President. It is feared that an attempt may be made to establish a new federation over here, if this be so we must get away as soon as possible. Oh it is dreadful, I feel like weeping over my country, what will we become! our enemies are those that are in the midst of us, with the Yankees we can cope. And yet there is a faith in me that bids me look forward to a time when I may be proud of this poor torn and bleeding country, but oh how far distant. I tremble to think of the future.
Willie left us this morning, I need not say how sad it was. On Father's
return from Monroe yesterday he said it was not safe for Willie to remain longer, the military had returned to Monroe and he might be conscripted at
any time, so hasty preparations were made last night and this mornings, and about nine o'clock his horse was packed with blankets, saddlebags, gun and
tin cup and Willie dressed in his “soldier shirt” had thrown his coat over
the saddle. Mr. Burke's mule was also packed and nothing remained but to
say goodbye. Brandon went off gaily as is his wont. Shall I ever see him
so hard to feel
that in truth we have no law.
Eva is improving fast, she took a ride in the carriage this evening,
is not yet able to sit up all day however. Mr. Bowmar Barr called here
this morning, is searching for his family, left his wife at her father's
in Tensas Parish, says he will be back here in about a week if he overtakes
his Mother. If we get permission we shall leave here as soon as
possible, we are very busy. I have made two pair of little pantelettes
for John today, I never sewed so much in a day before.
George is not at all well, has not been for several days, he had a chill yesterday and another today, Mother to going to give him quinine tomorrow. It is so dark I can not write any more.
Our passport came Sunday, but is only for Father, his family and
negroes and any other persons he may wish to take who are not included
in the conscription. It makes little difference, as the others can go
without a passport. We shall try and leave here a week from today,
Willie will join us down in the swamp. George has had four chills, but
Mother gave him quinine Sunday and he has had none since, he looks very
badly and, we fear, is taking the hooping cough. John has also been a
little sick, but has recovered. Col. Stevens died last Thursday.
I was at Tabitha Scarborough's wedding Tuesday night, she married Mr.
Shields, poor girl! I fear she has not made a wise choice, the wedding was
very small, no guests but Miss Sarah Garrett and myself and a few young
gentlemen. I could not help feeling sad, most of the persons present had
met at our fish fry at Crew lake, and Mary and Col. Stevens were there in
such high spirits; poor Mary! she is so desolate, I went in to Monroe
to see her yesterday evening and she called here this morning, she is so
changed, her sorrow is bitter but she does not weep, she cannot; only
yesterday when I accompanied her to their changed home and she looked at
his portrait, she was overcome, and this morning, sitting here in this
room, where we had sat so happily, she wept several times, and seemed relieved,
my heart bleeds for her. It is as if she had lost two Fathers in one year,
for Col. Stevens was a father to her, indeed she will miss him far more
than she did her own, she says she felt it sad enough when she was left
Yesterday morning we were perfectly and delightfully surprised by
Willie's return, he had been to the Mississippi. He saw no Yankees at all,
says that transports are continually passing up and down the river, but
never land either in Mississippi or Louisiana, he thinks we will be obliged
to build a flat and ferry ourselves across in the night. Dear Willie, he
is such a help to us and it is such a comfort to have him at home again,
how I shall miss him when he goes to the army, but I would not keep him
My poor little Molly, my beautiful little pet, has the sweeney, she
goes very lame and has lost her old fleetness, her shoulder is beginning
to shrink and I am afraid her beauty will soon be gone; Willie's present,
I have always prized her highly and she was such a perfect beauty, so
spirited and fleet. Miss Mary and I took a ride yesterday evening, our
horses had not been watered and Molly was very thirsty so when we arrived
at Mrs. Britt's I asked them to give her some water. I held a basin for
a drink from, but it did not satisfy her, and when we left I enquired the
way to the well, it was about a quarter of a mile from the house and the
most desolate looking place. There was a single log cabin right in the
woods, several benches for tanning leather and washing, some clothes hung
on lines stretched from tree to tree and the well, it had a few boards
nailed up around it and two pieces of rails crossed at each end, on these
the windlass rested, the bucket was a keg sawed off and there was a tub
near to pour the water in, we rode up to the cabin and asked the poor, pale woman who came to the door if there was any one there who could draw some
water for our horses, she said “no one but me;” of course I disclaimed any
wish to have her do it, and rode back to the well. Molly must have water
if I had to draw it, so draw it I must. I rode up to a log, dismounted,
gave the reins and my cane to Miss Mary, drew off my gloves, threw them on
a log and went to the windlass, my dress was terribly in my way and the
bucket was very heavy, but I went to work with both hands, furnishing quite
a laughable spectacle for Miss Mary, but when I had drawn the bucket, then
very warm this evening; we hoped to have some
rain just after dinner, but it resulted in nothing but a little sprinkle.
We have been packing all the week, I have nearly finished my preparations
for the journey, my trunk stands packed on one side the table, the valise
on the other, the bookshelves and mantelpiece are bare and so is the table,
except of baskets, papers and bottles and other things to be used on the
way; my desk is almost empty, only my journal book, portfolio, account book
and inkstands remaining and a precious bundle of Valeria's letters which I
did not put in the box with my other papers. My dear old desk must be left
here, and I may never see it again, this may be the last time I shall write
Mrs. Phillips came down today, came to see about going with us, she wrote a note to Mother the other day, saying that she would like to go as far as Montgomery, Alabama, under Father's protection, said she had conveyance for herself and baggage, provisions, servant, and all things necessary for the journey; today it appears that she has no conveyance and but little prospect of obtaining one, I am very sorry for her, but my charity does not go far enough for me to wish for her company on the way; it may be wrong, I may judge her unkindly, but I do not, cannot like her society.
This is the last time I shall ever date my journal from this dear home,
I feel as if it were the last, though Father says we may come back, everything
is packed, the wagons are drawn out in line and loaded, the furniture
carried upstairs and our mattresses laid on the floor for the last night's
It is nearly six years since we left our first Oakland, but that was nothing so sad as this, public and private grief both press upon us now; we must take up our cross, we must learn resignation.
Eva is not at all well today, she had fever this morning and looks pale and very thin, George had a chill and fever yesterday and we have all bad colds; not in a very good condition for travelling, but I hope the journey will improve us. Poor Willie has a severe cold and was so much fatigued tonight that he retired before supper. Johnny Stone called this evening to bid us goodbye, he is going back to Texas, we are going to Georgia; I cannot judge which has chosen the best. Mr. Barr was here this evening, I sent a note to Mrs. Morancy by him. Mrs. Phillips did not come down this evening, I suppose she has concluded not to go with us.
We have reached our first camping place, we are started. We left
home this morning, at nine o'clock, and are about fourteen miles on our
way. This has been an eventful day to us, we have had all kinds of adventures. When we left home we came round by Trenton to bid Mrs. Seale
goodbye, and Father and Willie and Mr. Duvall went the Natchitoches road
with the wagons, at the ferry Father came up with us and the first words
he greeted us with were “We have broke down” it was a dreadful sound to us
after all our trouble and painstaking to have broken down within three or
four miles of home. Father sent us all on while he and the carpenters
We are at our second camp, broken down again, two wheels to fill and
two tires to shrink, Last night when I went back into camp I found them preparing the beds, it was then that we felt the want of Father, everything
was confused, at last by Willie's strenuous exertions the mattresses
were laid down in the wagon, and Mother sent some one to make the bed without going to look at it, we put some boards across from one carriage seat
to the other, laid the cushions on them, spread cloaks and blankets down,
pinned shawls up at the windows and put Loring and Eva to bed in there, they
had an excellent bed but Eva was tired and wanted to be quiet, & Loring was restless and hungry so they “gassed” a good deal. We all gathered round
the camp fire, and heard something that made us feel very gloomy and long
our kitchen is established near the carriage just behind me. The carriage
looks so funny behind, there is a cake box with doughnuts and et ceteras
tied on behind, wreathed with red peppers and just on the other side is a
box with Mother's Grand duke jessamine, a cutting from my “Valeria” and
several heliotrope and cactus cuttings and one little violet, all living
finely. I hope they will get to Georgia. I am sitting on a nice log with
a tree for my back, which shaded me nicely when I first sat down, but the
sun is now creeping round on my book, just opposite, on the other side the
bayou is the work shop, established under the shade of a large and beautiful tree. Sandy, Alonzo, Mark, Levi and several assistants are at work, Father
is superintending and more often “lending a hand,” Mr. Duvall sitting on
a log, his hands clasped over his knees—looking on—Willie has gone with
a wagon and hands for corn. At the back of the camp there seems to be
great hilarity, for joyous tones mingled with the loud guffaw come to my
ears, and a little while ago the merry sound of a fiddle was heard, these
are the “poor persecuted African brethren.” This is our Second Camp. Here
is “Lazy Pete” with two gar fish in his hands, which he has just caught in
a mud hold near by, they look like alligators with the large mouths and feet like fins, and long pointed tail. Pete says “they taste like any other fish”
he asked me
if I wanted to go. I was glad of the opportunity and ordered Mack (my
hostler) to get Mollie in a hurry. We had a delightful ride, such
beautiful trees! no wonder the swampers love the swamp, but I love my
hills.
I was glad to see the dawning of the light this morning, last night
we passed most miserably. In the first place Loring had a chill just at
dark, and went to bed with fever, we were all comfortably established in
our tent, which was nicely fixed up, and were just going to sleep when we
were disturbed by a disagreement between Eva and Lory, he wanted the
windows open to get air, and she was certain she would take cold if they
were, we pitied them both, (poor Lory was groaning with fever) and at last persuaded him to take a place between Georgie and Miss Mary, at last we
got quiet again, the camp was perfectly still, and until between one and
two o'clock we did very well, but then our trouble commenced; Father woke
up with a severe pain in his back, which he mistook for rheumatism, but
he soon found his mistake, it grew worse and worse, and thinking it might
be flatulent colic (for it had come round gradually to his stomach) Father
took some peppermint, it did not relieve him, and Mother had the fire
lake water to so
sickly, it makes me feel sick to look at it, the beautiful, beautiful woods
and this black, rich earth are the dwelling place of malaria, the air last
night was heavy with dampness, and I seemed to breathe an atmosphere laden
with pestilence and death, it is indeed so. The poor man from whom Willie
bought corn yesterday has in his family a proof of it, we found him sitting
under a tree dressed in the cloth called “Lowells” pants and shirt
only which had once been white but were dirty and all raveled and worn
round the edges, bare head and feet, one leg of his pants rolled up almost
to the knee, he had a most
Father has just had another paroxysm, is easier now, Willie has fixed the syringe, and they are trying what effect it will have. I am afraid Father's sickness is a more serious thing than colic, Father thinks of inflammation of the kidneys, it is so strange that it should thus die away and return—
Just as I finished the last sentence of the above entry Father put the
tire on the new wheel, and immediately the camp was full of the bustle of
yoking and hitching the oxen, harnessing the mules, saddling horses and
other arrangements for moving on. The road for a few miles was, I think,
through the most beautiful forest I ever beheld, large grand trees, hung
with long, waving gray moss and clear of undergrowth, there is one tree I
shall never forget, just by the roadside, it is a white Oak whose giant
trunk divided a few feet from the roads into two branches each as large as
a large tree, high one for this region) for some water and
coming down through the unshaded barren field road the green wall of the
forest looked beautiful in my eyes as it must have done to the most critical,
there was no moss on the large live oak trees, whose leaves shone
and waved in the light, they grew so thick that there was no space at all between. Willie discovered about two miles from the camp that the wheel
of the North Carolina wagon was nearly broken. Father had just set the tire
and wedged some of the spokes the day before; we learned that there was a
blacksmith shop at Boeuf river and Willie said he thought the wheel would
so slowly.
Father felt quite badly and had a slight return of the pain. George had
a chill soon after we started, when we came to the Boeuf the wheel was
taken off and Father prepared to fill it, it was than about three o'clock
in the afternoon. The other wagons came down to the ford, a mile from the
shop. The ford is very long, not from the width of the river, which is low
now, but we have to go some distance through the current to avoid the mud.
One wagon ran down in a ditch and delayed the crossing somewhat, the teams
did not all got into camp and get corn until after dark, so that the breaking
of the wheel was no delay. When I had taken a piece of ham and biscuit
and let Mollie rest a few minutes, I took one of the men and went down to
see Father, I met Prince between here and the ford who told me that Father
had had another attack of pain, and was going to stay there all night. I
had already provided myself with the ginger and peppermint and Mother had
sent Father a biscuit, and when I heard this I turned back for a blanket.
Mother said Father must come home, I rode very fast, and was indeed relieved when I found Father up and in the shop, he consented to come to the
camp to spend the night, before he was ready to leave Mother came down in
the buggy, she was too anxious about Father to remain here, he came home
with her. Loring had taken a chill just as he reached our camping place,
and had had a very high fever, but when we returned from the shop his
fever had gone down, he was not entirely clear of it through the night.
Father suffered much, all night he did not sleep more than half an hour
in camp with tent
(?) pitched. Father has not been sitting up at all, has had only one
paroxysm and has slept a good deal. I hope he will be improved in the
morning, the Doctor pronounced it a severe fit of constipation. Miss Mary
and I took a nice bath and toilet this morning, we rode down to the shop
where there are some people living, carrying with us all the requisites for washing and dressing, went up to the house and made the singular request
that the lady would give us a room to dress in; how strange a request it
was, it did seem so then, but the more I think of it the more singular it
seems to me, what would I have thought if any one told me two months ago
that I should have done it, I should have laughed outright. But the lady,
a very nice polite person, did not seem to think it strange, she gave us
her only room, and we felt so pleasant when our toilets were completed
that I am very glad I happened to think of this mode of making them; we had
not undressed for three days and nights, not since we left home.
A gentleman passed here this evening who had a slight acquaintance
with Mr. Duvall, in this wise, he got mired up near Mr. Duvall's camp on
the railroad once when Father was there, and they took him in camp and I
I am so indolent and sleepy this evening, I commenced this journal
early in the afternoon, and now it is growing dark, we have a very nice
pretty camping place, large trees make it shady all day, and the grass
grows quite thick over the ground, though just around our tent its getting
a little dusty from being so constantly trodden over. If it were earlier
and I felt more in a writing mood I would describe the scene before me, but
as it is I have not the courage to attempt it. An observer of human nature
would find much entertainment in studying this
Glad was I this morning when the doctor came and pronounced Father
well enough to move and the order was given to prepare immediately, all
was soon ready and when we were once more in line a kind of exhilaration
was felt throughout the train. Father did not sleep very well last night
end Mother was up with him a great deal, but I knew nothing of it, exhausted
by the two previous sleepless nights I slept almost as soon as I
lay down and did not wake once, Mother aroused me about midnight to cover George. I was so sleepy, I got up and looked for the little fellow but
he was no where to be seen. “My little darling” I said alarmed, “where
are you” just then my eyes fell on his head, he had thrown himself quite
off the mattress and his feet were outside the tent.
Father has had no return of the pain today, but feels weak; I am not
feeling so bright and energetic as I did a few days since. I suppose it
is the fatigue and then I think the languor of the past summer is working
itself off and must be accompanied by some bad feelings. My face is full
of little pimples, and there is a fever blister on my lips, when I had the
fever I cannot tell unless it were night before last when I felt quite warm.
We came on today ahead of the ox team and when we had come about eleven
miles, stopped at a house to get good water to drink, the old gentleman
was very kind and polite, complimented Mollie before she had been two
now occupies the
other rocking chair, and Loring one of our old “country” chairs, George
and John are standing near with some potatoes, and Father not far off
directing about the tent. There is Willie with a bottle of wine in his
hand, he has been up to the house yonder to get Milk, and food for the
horses, and found out they had home made grape wine for two dollars a bottle. Mother has tasted it and found it good, “pure grape juice” she says, “we
have found a treasure, had better get a dozen bottles,” but now she says,
“Oh I was just in fun,” but I have just tasted it and think it very good,
though it leaves a taste like persimmons in my mouth, and Mr. Duvall who
has just come up says “Oh yes, it is very good!” Mr. Duvall always finds everything quite good.
I believe I am too hungry to write any more. I am so glad that neither Lory nor George have had a chill today, Mother gave them some quinine this morning. Loring is quite well, with the exception of fever blisters, but George still looks very badly though I think he is improving.—
Sunday evening it really is, and now it seems so, as I sit down quietly
in the hollows made by the roots of this gigantic tree, looking sometimes
into its boughs hung with grey moss, spread out above me, sometimes down
the sloping bank where the level evening light shades through other venerable
gray bearded trees to the calm, clear river, green with the reflection
of the thick trees and vines of the opposite bank; but this morning when
we were starting and after we started I shame to say I actually forgot it,
it was indeed so unlike our quiet Oakland Sabbaths, how differently our
last Sunday was spent. I never rode horseback on Sunday before in my life
and seldom in the carriage, when I did it was only to Church. But today
we have made the longest journey we have since we started, we have come
sixteen miles at the least, probably more, I really feel tired. We left
camp as early as possible this morning and traveled without stopping for
water or anything else until we reached Winsboro, quite a pretty little settlement with four or five white houses, a rickety looking place with
the large sign “Phoenix House” swinging on a post in front, a “New Dry Goods Store” and a “Drug Store” and in the center of a small grassy common a large brick house with two stories and several chimneys, which I suppose serves
so thirsty, the water
at Turtle creek where we stopped at dinner was so muddy that dainty Lord Railroad would not drink it at all. It seems as if we cannot travel a single
day without something breaking, nothing is actually broken today, that we
know of, but at dinner time there was one tire so nearly off that Father
doubted whether it would come here, it will have to be set before we go
further. At the house where we stopped for water this afternoon we overtook
a gentleman travelling to his home near here somewhere. Father asked
him as usual about crossing the river, he said he did not know much about
it but referred him to Mr. Murdock a “nice, correct gentleman” who lived at
St. Joseph's town, and could tell us all about it. Now this Mr. Murdock
is the same who went by our camp at Boeuf river with Mr. Bonjurin, and told
Mr. Duvall that if he could do anything to assist us we must call upon him,
so now we feel quite a right to do so having been recommended, and then
invited by himself. How quiet is this still evening hour on the banks of
Two days have passed by without my having recorded their events here,
but I think I shall have time this morning to give a full account. We left
Bayou Maçon about noon time Monday, having spent the morning in mending
and setting the broken tire and fixing up another, and in ferrying across
the Bayou, which last was of itself quite an undertaking, a few hundred
yards from the Bayou we came into the swamp, as Father informed us, the
great Mississippi swamp at last, from the Macon to the Tensas we came through it. I never saw anything like it before, I could have told at once that
it was the swamp, instead of gigantic trees, clear of undergrowth, that we
saw in the La Fourche, the growth was thick and matted with vines, everything
was green except the trunks of the trees, which in some places were
covered with vines but were generally marked with fine black moss defining clearly the height of the overflow, everything was rank luxuriance and looked more so under the damp murky clouds which hid the sky from our view, and
After walking up the steep bank on this side Miss Mary and I sat down
on the roots of a large tree to see the carriage come over, it was quite a picturesque scene before us, there was the narrow stream, the opposite banks
sage tea, which last I secretly determined I would
not take. I tried to take the pills in preserves and then in water but
could not and chewed them up at last as poor little Georgie did. I was
exhausted by my sleepless night of pain and slept or dozed throughout the
dull rainy day without any return of the pain. I am up this morning but
feel weak and giddy, ever since breakfast I have been writing, stopping frequently to lean back and rest and smell the bay water by my side, it is
so refreshing. Mrs. Morancy gave me a great present when she sent me that
little bottle full. I am sitting out here on the back piazza with a wet,
cloud wrapped view all around on my left. Sally is washing by the cistern,
the only person near, beyond is the garden and a field from the midst of
which rises the tall white-washed monument like chimney of the plantation
gin and mills which used to surround it, now they are burned down, leaving
only the chimney and a wreck of brick work and machinery to show where
This house has quite a nice appearance from the outside, with reconnoitres the ground.
I had almost forgot to say that Mr. Burke and Mr. O'Leary joined us
Monday morning at the Maçon we were very glad to see them coming, as they
In my same post on the back piazza, but how changed the scene, the willows and tall forest trees are brilliantly green, the field of weeds waves and glistens in the clear wind and bright light, and the belt of woods beyond is no longer dim though the bright haze of distance is between us, it is a luxury to gaze on the sky, no longer dim and changeless with the drifting grey clouds but full of life and beauty and movement, clusters and groups of white fleecy clouds variable as the shadows float between us, and the deep bright blue of the sky, such beautiful clouds, now shading a while the glorious sun, now letting a full flood of light on wood and fields, the mud is still here, for the sun only came out this morning, but with all this beauty and cheer overhead and this gentle but spiriting wind we are apt to tolerate more easily the muck and mire below. What spectacle can equal that of the sky, ever varying, ever full of meaning whether dark or bright there is always interest there. Well may Humbolt say that clouds give as much character to a landscape as terrestrial objects, they give more, the earth is the body, the firmament is the life, the soul. Our poor little plants are out in the sun today, the little heliotropes are wilting under his strong beams, but they will revive by and by.
Father went away this morning to the river to find out a way for us
to cross, he may come back tomorrow night but I hardly hope to see him till
Yesterday the mud dried so much and this morning the sun rose so
clear and bright that we prepared cheerfully for the days journey, it is
a bright pleasant day with a cloudless sky above, but we soon found that
the mud was still bad enough to render travelling very Mr. Watling's train and we answered yes, then followed several remarks
and he at last advised us to come back here to the first place as there
was a very good vacant house and water for men and stock, so we crossed the
long bridge which I dread, I never could bear to cross a bridge on horseback,
and we were soon established in this clean little house which has
several white plastered rooms, a piazza in front, and a little porch behind,
the little out of the mud, there is
no dwelling house on this place, the negros call this “the doctor's house”
I suppose the physician on the place used to live here, it is quite a
comfortable little place and I suppose some ladies stayed here, for there is
a discarded hoop skirt hanging in one of the rooms. We are to stay here
until Father returns, he may come tonight, but we can hardly hope to see
him until Sunday. Mr. Duvall says we got on wonderfully well today, only
broke a yoke, that was easily repaired, for we have extra new ones with us.
I believe we have no really sick ones today, though Eva is pale and Georgie looks badly, Eva missed her chill yesterday and today and I hope will not
have any more.
I have just returned from a pleasant walk down to the bayou where it
widens into a lake, and an knees, not a bud or sign of a leaf is seen anywhere about them. I
It is our task now to retrace our steps. The idea of going to
Georgia and all the anticipations—doubtful, pleasurable & painful which
it engendered are left behind us, we must do our best to forget them. I
said forget, but I did not mean, no we must never forget this journey, its bodily and mental trials and its joys, for joys it has had for me. The experience, the disappointment is useful; I hope, I trust it may not be long before we can say from our hearts “the bud may have a bitter taste, but
sweet will be the flower.”
The bud has indeed a “bitter taste” we will not deny that, it is best
to admit it, to receive the bitterness and profit by it. Yesterday evening
Father returned from the expedition to the river, and be brought the
unwelcome intelligence that we had been refused a passport, but I will
repeat something of what Father told us, after a full account of his journey
to Rodney, he said that when he arrived there he beckoned to the ferry
boat, which was a flat owned by two negro men; the Gun boat lay in the
ought to be there.” “Well, sir” was his final answer “you cannot cross
here.” Father bade him good morning, and went on to Natchez, when he
arrived there he immediately went to the Gen'ls office, when he told his
business to the usher he was told that he must go to the Provost Marshall,
he went there and was told he could not then be attended to, must return
at two o'clock, at two o'clock he returned, and after waiting about an hour
the Provost came. Father then prefaced his story by telling him that he
was the President of the V'bg, Shreveport and Texas railroad, intending to
tell him about the negroes, but here the Provost stopped him by telling him
literally everything we possessed,
and leave us on the bank of the river thus destitute; on the other hand, if
we went back we knew what we went to, it was present safety at least, though undoubtedly privation. Willie was in favour of making the attempt, but
Father and Mr. Duvall and Mr. Burke all thought the risk too great, and
Mother was appalled at the prospect of utter destitution if we were discovered, so at length it was decided that we were to turn back, and Father called
up the negroes to tell them the decision; they were all attentive while he
told them, and while he added that he had seen in those few days all kinds
of suffering that he ever expected to see, he had seen the graves of negroes
as thick as the heads before him, he had seen acres of the most miserable
little huts opposite Natchez where the negroes were staying, and negro
women up to their knees in water paddling out clothes, for want of tubs,
he had passed one plantation where there were a hundred negroes with no overseer and they had not a morsel of salt and but little meat; all the
able bodied negro men were put in the army, the others were left to shift
for themselves. Father told them that he thought he should be able to feed
and clothe them for another year here, but that if he were to be discovered
in the attempt to cross the river he should be “as powerless as Nancy's
baby there.” The negroes assented, Mark said he was willing to go back
and save what little was left, and so they all said. It is a sad
disappointment to Lonzo and Uncle Levi, they were so anxious to go back to
I have let two days pass without an entry in this journal, which ought
to be faithfully and punctually kept, I have neglected it, for no other
reason than just because I did not feel like writing, a poor reason indeed.—
did smooth it very much,
they made some of the holes worse, and the ten miles drive was very wearying, however, we reached the Maçon and forded it by twelve o'clock, which
we thought was very good driving. After resting an hour, in which we
lunched, & fed the horses and cattle, we again took up our march, having
set Winsboro for our night's camping place. It is twelve miles distant
from the Maçon, and a long and weary twelve miles it was to me, Mollie
was so lame that traveling was painful to herself and her rider, and I
could not chase away by a short thought, but not so it proved, for about one o'clock
we were aroused by Mr. Burke's calls to his “staff,” (it was his watch)
and by the running to and fro to get the women & children and bedding under shelter. We rubbed open our sleepy eyes, put on our frocks and got the
children up, fretting at being awakened. Miss Mary and Willie went on,
Miss Mary with a lantern, and Willie with John in his arms; they went to
a little house with two rooms which was fortunately on the edge of the
common. Hither we all fled except Father, he stayed at the tent to attend
white family
all seeming sound asleep, ranged around the sides of the room were the
negroes, in various grotesque positions, some sitting propped up against
the wall, some wrapped in quilts and blankets, giving no indication that
it was other than a pile of bed-clothing except by the loud snore that
came from its depths, others were lying without blanket or quilt, and Jeff having quietly taken off his coat and laid it under Willie's head (W. was so sound asleep he did not know it) had seated himself on the edge of one of the
boards, which formed part of the wall of this dilapidated house, & was
sleeping as quietly as if on a bed of down. Through the unshuttered door
I saw the floor covered with sleeping negroes lying close together, covered
scantily or not at all, but most of them better provided for than we, opposite
me by the corner of the fireplace Lonzo was seated on the floor, a
basket which he seemed to consider very valuable, by his side, and his arms embracing his knees, which formed a resting place for his head. All this
I saw by the light of the dying fire, and it was very interesting to me,
sloppy roads. The wagons
left camp about seven o'clock & we followed in an hour or so, we had gone
about a half a mile when we perceived the mule wagon drawn drawn to a halt and
all the other mule equipages in front, the carriage had not yet started from
heaving”and directing when
Father's troubled voice broke in upon us, all had been so busy they had not
noticed his approach. Antony immediately commenced his excuse, but it was
quite lost in Father's reproof. At length the wagon was pulled up on the
bank again, and then the extent of the evil was learned, the back wheel,
(the same one that was filled at La Fourche) was “completely smashed up,”
which means it was to be filled over entirely; well, the end was that
they put a drag under the axle, hung the wheel on the back of another wagon
and started, but not by any means as easily as I have written it. (Miss
Mary and I with the children came on, followed by the mule teams, Mother
waited behind for Father.) We (the advance guard) arrived here before
twelve, and drew up on our old camping place in the grove. We went up to
the house just opposite to see Mrs. Smith about corn and fodder & a shelter
but she was gone to Winsboro and there was no one at home but a Mr. Williams,
a boarder as he informed us, he gave us quite an autobiography of himself,
but did not know anything about our business, except that we could get corn
and fodder and that he reckoned Mrs. Smith would let us have what else we wanted, as she was very accommodating to strangers, had been ever since he
We have not found her
very obliging, but let that pass, the poor woman has seen much sorrow, she
has lost her husband and thirteen children on this very place, her last
child died a few months since. Mr. Williams told us that she was a beautiful
child of five years old, “the kindest child to be so much spoiled of
any he ever saw.” (The poor man has none of his own, I expect.)
It was quite late in the afternoon before the wagons arrived, and they
were ready to commence on the broken wheel, but Lonzo and Sandy and Father
all worked with other subordinates and they advanced rapidly. The wheel
is now nearly completed and it is only about twelve o'clock. I have been
writing by snatches nearly all the morning, first seated by the camp fire
where Mother and Mr. Duvall were talking on subjects very interesting to
me, and for a time when Willie came up I ceased writing altogether. Now
I am in the carriage by Georgie, who has had a chill and now is sleeping
off the fever. The dear little fellow is so still and patient that he does
not interrupt me much; my poor little darling, his face is sadly pale and
is growing quite sallow. I wish he were well like John, who is still
plump and red cheeked as ever, and—as mischievous. Two soldiers paid
us a visit this morning, they are from Bragg's army, left since the fight,
two good looking, well behaved young men, one had lost a finger in the fight, poor young man, he was so strikingly like Horace, the same blue eye and
yellow moustache and same expression of lip, only he was short and Horace
was quite tall. I remember him well, though it has been six years since
I saw him last. But I have quite digressed from my subject, it was (?) that
This soldier also told us that someone had tried to cross the Mississippi last week with a wagon, and had been taken; I did say it is best after all that we did not attempt. All other considerations I could cast behind me, but oh, if Willie could only be with Angus and John, I should feel as if I had three brothers together almost, though Willie is dearer, infinitely dearer than they can be, though they are Valeria's brothers.
I must not forget an important thing I learned this morning. Old Mr. Cole came down here to see about buying the lumber we brought along for a flat, and while he asked how I and Molly got along, he was very much delighted with Molly the day we stopped at his house. I then entered into an explanation of my grievances, and he told me he knew a certain cure for the swinney, he had cured many a horse, I eagerly took it down, and am going to try it in good faith, though Mr. Duvall does say he don't believe it can cure her.
The weather is now clear and fine, Just cool enough. We shall only
follow our old road as far as the Boeuf, where we take a road up by Girard,
to leave the negroes there, I am glad we are to take a different road,
though I should like to see the beautiful forest of the La fourche again,
Last night we arrived at our old camp here, pitched our tent on the
same place, and tied the mules to the same tree as we did before. We
left Bogue Chitto at about one o'clock, and arrived here at sunset,
without any accident. This evening found us all more cheerful than we
have hitherto been, and we sat round the camp fire and talked some time
after supper, leaving out almost entirely the subject of our future prospects. Today we hope to make Crew Lake, a few miles beyond Girard. This
will be a new road for us. Molly is still very lame, hardly able to carry
me, she was yesterday evening. I hope she may be improved this morning.
I believe I have nothing more to write of importance, and Miss Mary wants
to go down and see the wagons ford; I should not object were it not for
my remembrance of the oaths with which the first crossing here was accompanied, the sound of profanity makes me feel sick at heart; I wonder how men can
dare to take the Holy name in vain.
We are almost at our journey's end now, indeed this is the end of the
journey, for the railroad negroes and Mr. Duvall and Mr. Burke, for here
they separate from us, Father is going to leave the negroes on Mr. Gordon's
We stopped for dinner yesterday at Mrs. Raines' place, Mr. Myrick's
Mother-in-law; but found to our regret that they had all moved a week ago, started for the west somewhere. After eating our little lunch, we came on
to Girard, halted there a little while, for Father to see Mr. Baldwin, and
then came on through the swamp, the green trees grew thick around us, and
almost forgot that I had eaten no supper and that I
was tired and sleepy. Oh he is such a funny figure and has such a funny
way of shutting his mouth and twinkling his eye. When the Yankees passed
through here he ambushed himself near his daughter's house with his gun
and horse and watched their movements, he said he could easily have killed
one or two, but thought he would not trouble them unless they “interfered
with the women and then they should have paid for it certing;” he said if
he had only known that they were going to camp where they did on Boeuf river
he would made many of them fall that night. This is the hardy language of
a pioneer of the old times, and Father says he would not have failed to
act up to it. This morning he paid us another visit, and when Mollie was
led to water some of us remarked how very lame she was, he enquired the
cause and on hearing it was the swinney said immediately that he could cure
it by rubbing turpentine well into the shoulder, and then ironing it, he
offered to take Mollie and cure her in three weeks. I was only too glad
to leave her with him as he promised so great a benefit, though I hated to
part with her; Willie's pet he always called her, and I always think of
her more as Willie's pet than mine; I shall never be able to thank Captain Justice enough if he cures her. It was nearly ten o'clock when we were
ready to go to bed last night and I slept heavily after the fatigue of the
day, this morning when I rose I was still drowsy and have been all day.
We did not leave our camp until quite late and had only advanced two or
three miles when we came to the La Fourche, here we found part of a rough puncheon bridge connected with the opposite by an old flat resting on the
muddy bottom and with the floor all broken out. Mr. Burke succeeded in
pleasure of learning that our road was wrong, and retraced our steps under
Mr. Duvall's direction, who had ridden up to inform us of our mistake; we
were following Uncle Levi, who said he knew all about the roads, and really
he would have led us right if we had followed him a little further; he persevered in his own way and arrived here before we did, when we got back
Yesterday Father found that he had something to arrange here which
would make it necessary for him to remain a day or two longer than he
expected and he came to the conclusion that it would be best to send me on
as avant coureur
Our three weeks journey is safely ended, I sit by the fire in my own
old room and date my journal “Oakland” once more, around me everything is familiar, but these things awaken no joy in my heart, this coming home is
sadder than any departure has ever been to me, I feel my heart cold when
I know it ought to be grateful, I am grateful, but I am so sad, so coldly
sad, God forgive me and deliver me from my own sinful, murmuring heart.
I have been busy today unpacking and arranging things. We came home yesterday,
Miss Mary, Loring and I came in the buggy and arrived here at two
o'clock, the others stopped in town and were later. The house looked
lonely and strange, the great empty rooms echoed to the sound of our voices
and the yard was littered with fallen leaves and scraps of cotton. Even
the beautiful bright sunlight seemed to fall coldly. We tried to give the
rooms a better aspect, lighted a fire in the dining room and made it a
little less lonesome by the time Mother came. Father did not arrive till
nearly sun down, we got the bedsteads set up and beds made and partially unloaded the wagons, then Mrs. Willson and Julia came in, stayed only a
few minutes and after they left we had a little bread and meat for supper,
called down the two poor couriers who had not eaten since morning, it was
late when we retired, the day had been one of painful excitement and some
fatigue to me and I was surprised this morning when I opened my eyes to
find that it was broad day, shining through the uncurtained windows, but
all was still, and I slept again. Poor Loring had a chill yesterday afternoon
and another today, Georgie's turn comes tomorrow. Poor children, I
am sorry for them. We parted from Willie at Millhaven yesterday, he told
Yesterday I recommenced my little school, the children did very well,
better in fact than I had dared to hope. I think I shall succeed better
with them this winter than I did last. Oh if I could only interest them
in their books, I should consider it the highest blessing of my life to be
able to do them any good. We have gotten quite regulated now, Father has
every one at work under his
It is very warm today and looks like rain, the cloudy sky is favourable to my little transplanted violets and to the bermuda grass Father set out by the door yesterday afternoon. The clock strikes nine and I must call up my four pupils.
We were disappointed in seeing Willie yesterday, he could not have
received Father's note, we expect him certainly today, for Father has sent
again for him. Mother is going in town today to bring Willie out and also
to see Mrs. Stevens who has returned to Monroe. Father brought home some
news last night which was quite sad for us to hear, Johnny Davis is at work
for the Yankees, or, what is worse, for a reprobate Southerner called “old Montagu” who is perfect traitor to the country, and is working several plantations owned by refugees. I am so sorry that Johnny Davis should act
so, it is disappointment too, we all had such high opinion of him; he wrote
back to Mr. McGuire what he had done, I should not have thought he could
have so much hardihood as to write of it. Mother thinks there may be some extenuating circumstances as he is very young, and his Mother may have influenced him to act thus in view of her poverty and necessity. We ought
not to judge too harshly, we can never know all the motives one has, nor
can we know the full strength of the temptations which assail others. How
often have I condemned when I thought myself fully warranted in doing so,
and afterwards have found the innocence of the supposedly guilty person,
Wednesday evening Willie came, we were all so glad to see him, John and George ran and clasped his knees the moment he alighted from the carriage, and John immediately pulled him in the pantry to the safe to get him a piece of candy. Willie only remained one night, the next morning he and Father went to Col. Harrison's camp where Willie was sworn in and took his furlough, he then went down to Mill Haven. He says Capt. Justice says that Mollie is quite well except the healing of her shoulders, he thinks he has stopped the swinny.
Agnes Willson spent the day with Eva Wednesday, Julia sent me, by her,
a beautiful boquet of rich flowers, dahlias, cape jessemine, lantanas,
hybiscus,
These lines were in my thought last night and sadly my heart echoed them as I thought of a distant grave.
Miss Mary took her first music lesson from Mrs. DeLory yesterday, she is to go in town twice a week to take a lesson. Loring drove her in yesterday, with two of our pupils being absent, we were only in the schoolroom an hour or two. Georgie is progressing, can spell six seven words, I do not make him learn the a - b abs, but have him read and learn words by observing them in sentences in connexion with others, in this way he will not forget them, and it is much more tolerable to him than the dry columns would be. It has some disadvantages, I know, but fewer I think than the other way.
Lucy Seale and Mrs. Norris rode up to see me Wednesday afternoon,
Lucy was dressed, as she always is, with the utmost neatness, in black
I rose very early this morning, the round moon was shining brightly into my west windows and did not set until I had been up some time. Father and I were the only ones stirring in the house, so I have gained time to write and read a little before breakfast, besides having my hour for devotion, quiet and alone.
Willie came home Saturday night, and spent Sunday with us, he is going
back this morning, he and Mr. Duvall have moved up to Mrs. Willson's place, “Limerick,” where they are to remain until they gather her corn. Willie
makes excursions continually in search of hogs and cattle and other animals
for food, so that he can scarcely be said to remain anywhere, he looks so
well now, his health seems completely reestablished, he has not had a sick
day for a long time. Mr. Duvall, poor man, continues very delicate, Willie
says he eats scarcely anything and when he does take a little meat and bread
he says he has taken too much, poor man! I am so sorry for him.
Mr. & Mrs. Barr dined with us yesterday, called on their way to Homer
from Mrs. Barr's Father's in Tensas. We were very glad to see them, and
sent many messages to them all at Homer. I should like so much to see Mrs.
Barr and Mrs. Morancy and the baby, I told Mrs. Bowmar Barr to tell Mrs.
Morancy to be sure and write to me. Dr. McDonough also dined with us yesterday,
so that with the company & Willie and the couriers we had quite a
I am reading Cosmos again, am only in the third volume, for nearly
half a year I had not opened the book until this last week. I am reading “Kenilworth” aloud, we all find it extremely interesting, but feel sad all
the time that it must come to such an unhappy end. I think no one ever drew
characters and scenes more true than those of Scott and such a multiplicity,
Tuesday morning Mrs. Willson sent to borrow the buggy and after a
while Mother decided to lend it to her and send Miss Mary in to her music
lesson in the carriage, and proposed that I should accompany her and go
to see Mary Stevens, so I went, for I wished very much to see her and Mrs.
Stevens. After leaving Miss Mary at Mrs. DeLary's I drove to Mrs. Dr.
McGuire's, only intending to spend a few moments, for my errand was to get
some hops for Mother and to reborrow Lamartine for myself, but I lengthened
my few minutes very astonishingly, for I like Mrs. McGuire very much and
could not break from her conversation, continuous, varied and interesting
as well as discriminating and kind, how many adjectives! but they are all
just, she is of french parentage, but married an American, and retains her
vivacity and penetration in her age and in spite of a life full of sorrow,
she has lost her husband and her family of children, as well as many relatives;
her parlour is a perfect room of curious and pretty things, so
crowded together that one can hardly distinguish their beauties, and the
walls papered with the old fashioned, large figures are hung up to the low
ceiling with family portraits and good engravings, then she has a large
library and a greenhouse and a large garden.
From Mrs. McGuire's I went to Mrs. Steven's where I met a quiet but
warm welcome from May and her Aunt, Mrs. Stevens looks sad and much older
to me than when I saw her last; May is much improved, the stony look of
sorrow has left her face and I have seldom seen a sweeter expression, it
former
United States would be a great aid in our school room.
During our ride home from Monroe Miss Mary entertained with a description
of her lesson and her teacher, and an account of a proposed concert near
It is now past sunset, the short winter twilight is fading, the day
has been rainy and cloudy by turns, and I am sitting by my window, the
sash is raised for the air is not cold, the hillside is no longer green,
but varied with the rich colour of fall with a few green leaves and above
all, the dark, strong tinted foliage of the pine, the rosy light comes
through the light clouds and pervades the air, but as I write it grows dim
This is Willie's twenty second birthday, he was here yesterday, but
could not be at home on his birthday as we wished, he only stayed to dinner
with us yesterday, he works so hard, his aid is invaluable to Father. My
dear Father, his cares wear upon him, his expression is changed to one of
constant care and anxiety and his voice has taken a tone of sadness that
makes the tears start to my eyes when I hear it, his talents are the same,
he still accomplishes very much, but how it would gladden me to see again
the clear, bright glance of his eye, I have never seen a man's eye with such
a beautiful expression when he is well and happy, it is so clear one feels
that no falsity, not the shadow of it is there, and it strong and boyish
in perfect innocence and it kind of gaiety and yet one feels that they
can perfectly trust their life even, to him. I cannot express the “expression,”
I once pointed it out to Valeria, and she recognized it immediately.
It is now indeed winter, though the weather is less wintry than we
had last month, true to
Willie came home Saturday evening, spent Sunday with us, he leaves again this morning. We have hopes of getting the books and piano again soon. Mr. Gordon was here yesterday, wanted to get some iron from Father, made an arrangement with him to bring our things, it will be so pleasant to have them again, we miss the books especially.
We had a frost Friday night which killed the heliotropes out in the garden. I cut them down and covered the roots, the large one had such a thick stalk, it was like a little tree.
I am at home today for the first time since we returned, I feel the
full thankful home feeling, my beloved hillside speaks to my heart today
for the first time and wakes a warm, trembling throb of joy, the old meaning which has lain asleep so long that I feared it was gone forever has wakened
and once more everything looks familiar and dear, there is my beloved pine standing clear against the deep blue sky, there is the delicate tracery of
the more distant oak tops, and the little vista of brown trunks opening
through a space between the sweet gum and the being, not its varied cares and hopes and aims which are called forth by our social life; life as the free existence of an individual, ah
the very consciousness of such a life is fraught with a sense of joyous freedom. Nature is well called our Mother, what a close delightful union exists between nature and human feeling, nature always reaches my heart.
I arose very early this morning, about half past four o'clock, was very
sleepy at first and shuddered to leave the warm bed, but I felt glad of it afterwards, I had finished bathing, and was dressed in my warm wrapper and
had a quiet hour to myself when Father called me to look at the moon, the
whole place was asleep, and overhead the stars shone bright in the solemn morning heaven, the moon, a silver thread, shone in the eastern horizon and
high above glowed Venus so brilliant yet mild in her beauty, she was the
fairest gem in the heavens, but my heart gave a bound of joyous recognition
as I walked into an open space between the trees and saw glorious old Orion
just before me, what a beautiful constellation it is and being the first
one I learned, it seems like a familiar friend, there too were all the well known winter constellations, Sirius and Procyon and the pretty little triangle
It was Wednesday I think that we were surprised by a visit from Willie,
The week that has past since I last wrote has been a long one and
very eventful to us. Miss Mary and Loring went in town on Monday, and as
Eva was not very well we did not have any school. Mrs. Mays came to spend
the day. In the evening Willie rode up accompanied by his substitute, it
is a hard word for me to write, harder still for me to think of. Michael
for the price. The surgeon here expressed himself well
pleased with the man, but the papers had to go to some higher officer from
whom they returned the other day with the endorsement, “no more substitutes received except in case of the sickness or disability of the party procuring them,” this is ridiculous for it is only those well qualified for
the army that need a substitute, Col. Harrison said it was an assumption
of power and advised Father to write to Kirby Smith about it. I sometimes
think I have false ideas on this subject, and that Willie is perhaps
doing his duty better by remaining to assist Father who so much needs him
than by going into the camp where he would not assist our country any more,
but still I cannot help feeling it as a stain, a cause for blushing, that
he should have a substitute. Oh, if we had only got to Georgia! but then
a greater sorrow might have come upon us. I ought to be resigned, and yet
I cannot be. It seems to me I am getting more and more irritable and unhappy.
The children, try me so much, I could be happy if I thought I was doing them
any good. Friday Mother, Father and Miss Mary went to town and George had
a chill, so I had only Lory and Eva in school. I tried to teach them with
as much gentleness as possible, but Lory yawned and made faces and would
not read, and at last fell into a fearful passion. I have never seen any
one like him when he does so, which he does quite often, he raged and trembled
Mary Stevens and Mrs. Harrison, her cousin, dined with us Friday, they came by in the morning on their way to Dr. Temple's to have Mrs. Harrison's teeth worked on, and did not get back to dinner till late, their visit was so pleasant that it made me almost forget the morning but at night the recollection came back. Oh if I could be assured that I doing right, that the end will be for good I could bear the present trial, but sometimes I think it would be better for me to let Loring alone altogether.
Mr. Seale set out for Arkansas on Monday, he is to buy flour and grain
and salt for us. Dr. McDonough took tea with us Thursday, Willie was also
Mr. Gordon came back last night but I suppose it will be a week before
the wagons arrive. I am getting on a little better in school, yesterday
Miss Mary went to her music lesson but the others were in school and did
very well indeed. George took quinine and missed his chill; he has had but
Father went on a shopping excursion yesterday, bought a piece of
very pretty plaid linsey for twelve dollars a yard! and some other woolen
stuff for seven, he brought home a piece of bleached cotton for Mother to
look at, it is coarse and very thin, price nine dollars per yard! The
cheapest thing was a paper of needles only a dollar and a half.
My nineteenth birthday, it is evening, and that quiet hour when all
are gathered in the parlour and no sound is heard except the crackling of
my fire which throws its cheerful light all over the walls and furniture,
a pleasant scene inside, but out of doors the dreary November evening is
fading into night. I feel sad, and many thoughts stir in my breast, as I
think of the past year, ah, if I could, I would not write the retrospect
here, many trials there have been, it has been the most eventful period of
my life and probably will remain, so, but it is not for me to consider what
I have felt, but how I have improved the gifts of Providence for trials
are gifts as well as joys, and to me more beneficial ones, I hope tremblingly that I may have grown stronger, more perfect in the faith which is life's greatest blessing, but I feel within me the need of far, far greater strength, in looking into my heart today, I see many prevailing errours of life and thought, and there are others thrown into the shade I know, I feel every
day, every hour how weak my own resolves are, unless my God supports me!
But with all these thoughts mingle those of the dead and the absent. I
yearn for my friend, my Valeria. If I could write to her, if I could once
more see her familiar writing, even if I knew where she is, I pray constantly
I spent a few days in town last week with Mary Stevens, went in
Thursday, and came out Sunday; it seemed so strange to be at leisure, and
free from plans as to how I should apportion my day, I enjoyed my visit,
it was very quiet and somewhat sad. Mrs. Stevens was not well, and I
spent most of my time with May, she was kind and gentle but the shadow on
her is dark and heavy, poor Mary, how every hope seems to have been removed,
it seems to me she must live amidst sad memories and she does in a measure,
but not as I would, she is an excellent disposition. I met a
Sunday when I came home I found that our books and piano had come.
Monday as soon as school was over we commenced to unpack them. I spent
that evening and the next in arranging them upon the shelves in the parlour where I thought a few months ago I should never see them stand. Father put
up the shelves and fixed a lock on the door and we laid down a small carpet
and arranged the furniture so that now our parlour is very comfortable and pleasant looking, something better than luxury pervades it. Yesterday evening
I am reading “Little Dorrit” aloud, I do not like it very much, my interest in it already begins to flag, though I am as yet only a quarter through. The wearying phraseology of the characters, the constant, recurring portraitures, produce somewhat of the effect of repetition, in my mind Dickens cannot compare with Scott.
Oh how cold it is! I am very cold though sitting on the rug, with my
Yesterday morning we were all joyfully excited by Mollie's arrival; Capt. Justice's little son rode her home, she does not limp at all, but is a little stiff in her shoulder which Capt. Justice thinks she will never recover from. I must take a ride the first fair day.
Mr. J. Gordon left for Texas yesterday.
A new courier, a Mr. Flowers, came here the other day, Wednesday, we have now two, Mr. Bilberry and Mr. Flowers, for a time we had only one, the second one who came was very anxious to go home, as he had a large family, and had left his affairs somewhat unsettled. Father used his influence to get him a furlough, and he has been absent eight days, he promised to bring Miss Mary and I some flowers on his return, entirely of his own accord.
Father has decided to take Mrs. Willson's place (“Limerick”) and Willie is there now, we expect him home tonight.
Major Bry returned from Houston the other day with some goods;
brought some calico for us at five dollars a yard, sevenpence in peace
times, he did not get any shoes, they were seventy-five dollars a pair.
Dr. Calderwood returned from Vicksburg yesterday, brought out some goods,
are all we
have, this one does not quite suit me in shape, although I tried hard to
make it like mine.
I took my first ride on Mollie Tuesday evening, Father and I rode
down to the mill, through the woods, in other times our favourite and almost daily ride, we had a very pleasant one on Tuesday, Mollie did not go lame
at all, she actually bounded beneath me in her old wild, free way. I enjoyed
my ride very much, it had been nearly two years since Father and I
rode together. I was busy Wednesday evening in the garden with Uncle Jim
setting out roses and other things; I set a cutting of a climbing rose
which Willie brought me from Arcadia before my window, and a honeysuckle
and “Lady Banks” in front of the house. We put stakes around them and I
think they will grow. I was very intently superintending the planting of
my roses when Dr. McDonough came up, he took me quite by surprise but I was
very glad to see him, as I always am for I have come to like him very much.
He sat some time. Miss Mary made the remainder of some gelatine that he
sent over Sunday, he said the poor soldier to whom it was given relished
Sunday night there was a soldier here from Bragg's army, he was on foot and we took him in, though the house was full; he brought a newspaper which contained news of the late battle between Bragg and Rosencranz, it appears that Bragg was defeated, but I am in hopes from the tenour of the despatches that he may recover his position. The dispatch said that the Washington and Cobb artillery had been taken with all their guns. I do not know whether John and Angus and Green Raoul were in that division, but oh I hope not; I have been thinking of them and their sister all the week, it has seemed as if I were walking among memories of the dead and absent, and a grief like that of first bereavement has been with me. Oh if I only knew where Valeria was, I might write to her and that would be some relief from the grief of her absence. I wonder if she has any idea of how constantly she is in my thoughts, ever lovingly and with a great desire.
Mrs. McGuire went away yesterday, she had improved from her visit.
I have been busy as usual during the week, reading and teaching, yesterday
Last night we recommenced our readings which had been interrupted during Mrs. McGuire's visit, we have nearly finished Little Dorritt.
Eva had a chill Sunday, but took quinine and did not have another. Georgia has had two this week, I hope he will not have another, he has grown yellow already. Mr. Seale came back today, he brought some flour and some skins for Father, he had been gone a month. He brought me a letter from Mrs. Morancy, a letter so affectionate and so like herself that it was extremely grateful to me. It is in answer to one I sent her by Mr. Barclay the other day; he called here a few moments, was looking remarkably well, he is very gentlemanly in appearance, with a face very attractive to me, and one which is unlike any I ever saw before. The weather has been disagreeable for several days, dark and cold. Willie is at home this evening, has just returned. I suppose his arrangements for his substitute are quite finished now, I never speak of it, and cannot think of it without pain, which is so much the worse that it has none of the softness of sadness, but rather a little mingling of self reproach that I should ever seem to lack affection for a brother who has always been to me the kindest and dearest that a brother can be.
I have just read the closing sentences of Lamartine's
I had a letter from Miss Kate Stone Saturday, it contains the sad news of her brother's death from a hurt received by his horse, this is the second brother she has lost in the army, there is now but one remaining, and he is just recovering from severe wounds; how much sorrow everywhere. How different our feelings now from those this season brings in time of peace. A shadow of evil to come hangs over us, Father's face is sad and anxious, he has heard something lately that leads him to fear that the Yankees will make Monroe a permanent post; he looks forward to losing all his property, and perhaps a worse fate. I should be willing to endure poverty, willing to labour for my bread all the rest of my life if I could see my country in peace, see the South take her place among nations and be able to say with grateful pride, I am a southerner, this is the end I hope and pray for and I believe it will come, though now our sky looks so dark; our foes within, our inefficient and false officers, and the lukewarmness of the people are what we have contend with, these are foes far more powerful than the Yankees, and when I think of the corruption in our midst and see no genius powerful enough to crush it, I fear that we shall gain our liberty only after years of war and perhaps anarchy.
There is to be a ball in Monroe Christmas eve, I have received an invitation
and yesterday Mrs. McGuire sent to urge me to go with her, but I am
Mrs. Brantley and Miss Randall, a relative of hers, spent the night with us Thursday. The weather has been very cold for several days, but is warmer now, the ground did not thaw for three days; we had some ice cream Sunday, frozen with ice from the little stream in the grove.
Christmas has come, and the holidays are almost gone before I have
written a word about it. The day before Christmas was busy cooking all day,
and this made us feel a little like Christmas was coming. Father and Miss
Mary went into town that day and brought out some candy and pecans with
which we filled the children's stockings, they woke up before day in the
morning and were highly delighted, John was full of surprise, for he cannot
remember last Christmas, and if he could, we had no “Santa Claus” then;
we had our stockings hung up and candy in them, and Miss Mary scratched the
chimney bask in imitation of Santa Claus' carriage wheel tracks, Georgie
came in our room in the morning and related with a wondering air how he
could see the marks of Santa Claus feet on Mother's room chimney, we then
showed him ours and he was strengthened in his belief, After they were
dressed, the children ran out to distribute candy among the little negroes
and before breakfast all had disappeared. When our late breakfast was over,
We had singing and playing for an hour or more in the evening, and then closed the day with a few pages from Homer's Iliad. Mr. Haddrick, one of our couriers, came down to hear the music, and seemed somewhat cheered, he looked low spirited before, thinking about home I suppose; he is a very young man, quite modest and well mannered, at first he was very shy but is getting a little acquainted now, he never saw a piano before he came here, and ours is quite a curiosity to him.
Altogether, our Christmas day was better than the last, principally
because Father was here, but yet it was by no means merry, as it could not
be now when our prospects are so uncertain and gloomy. The next two days
passed quietly enough, Monday we went in to the concert at Mrs. DeLary's. General Mouton's command, from lower Louisiana, has just arrived, and part
of it was crossing at Trenton, so we were obliged to drive down to the Monroe
Willie had accompanied us on horseback, but he was obliged to turn and
drive the mules home. I don't know how we should have done but for our kind
Lieutenant who went over in the flat with us and assisted us out, indeed
all the soldiers were very good and seemed sorry instead of glad at our
accident. We laboured up the hill completely loaded with packages. Rose
had her blankets and a carpet bag to carry, I had a shawl and bundle and
Mother a box, we parted from Miss May at the top of the hill, for she was
going to Mrs. McGuire's. The street was crowded with soldiers and our walk
was anything but agreeable. We got to Mrs. Stevens just in time to make
ourselves presentable for the concert; and then we were rather late and our
The last night of the old year, today has been dark, cold and snowy,
and the wind has blown and whistled all day long, but it is stilled now,
and the quiet stars shine brightly in the cloudless sky; tomorrow's sun
will rise upon a new year. And in this year if it please God to help me,
Oh what a cold new years day, everything was frozen this morning, and
is still frozen, the thermometer this morning stood at only eight deg.
above zero; I think it was colder this morning than I ever felt it before.
I was busy thawing all the necessaries for washing about half an hour after
I arose, and it took us so long to warm and dress that it was nine o'clock
when we eat breakfast, a pretty beginning of the year but it was so cold,
But I was so sorry in going into the parlour after breakfast to find Mother's pretty, chaste little parian marble pitcher broken, I use it to put violets in, and day before yesterday I gathered a large and beautiful bunch and filled it with them, last night the water froze into a solid mass and split the pitcher into three pieces all held together by the ice, the same happened to my little vase, only it was worse broken. I am so sorry about Mother's pitcher, it was a gift from Aunt Mary and she prized it highly, and it was all owing to my carelessness in not thinking to pour out the water. We took the ice (shaped like the pitcher) and put it on a saucer on the what not and although there has been a large fire in the parlour since early this morning, it has not even softened. The ink I am writing with has just been thawed out. But I must stop writing and go to bed, I am afraid I shall take cold sitting up in my dressing gown.
My real New Year commenced this morning, not very auspiciously either, we did not get along quite smoothly in school, I am in hopes we shall do better tomorrow.
I commenced learning John his letters this morning, the dear little
fellow was so good and so funny that he set us all to laughing. Saturday
it was so cold we could hardly do anything but keep warm, the thermometer
Mr. Craig was here Saturday morning, said such cold had not been known since 1856, one of the steam pipes of his mill was burst by the frost. Our poor little plants have fared illy, this cold has finished what the last began, the cactus is killed down to the roots, and so is the wax plant, and all the rest. Oh for Spring to awaken life once more, to bid our dead plants to revive, and infuse new life into us as well as the vegetable world. Today has been dark and gloomy, and the atmosphere is very raw. I commenced reviewing my latin lessons today, indeed it can hardly be called a review, for I have forgotten most of what I learned. Commenced reading Gibbon's Rome abridged New Year's night, we take it instead of the original, though it is so much abridged that it hardly resembles it except in the bare facts. Dr. McDonough spent part of the morning and dined with us yesterday, said he was very much exhausted from watching and care, had slept very little for three or four nights; they have an insufficient supply of bed clothing at the hospital, and he was obliged to keep up large fires all night, and even then they suffered from cold during those intensely cold nights, they had used seven large wagon loads of wood since the Tuesday after Christmas, but this will appear probable when one knows that they keep up six fires day and night.
I am sorry for poor Dr. McDonough, he is of a very sensitive temperament, and the sight of so much suffering must be very painful to him.
There was a most horrid murder perpetrated in Monroe the other day; Mr. Baker's little son, only seven years old was riding through town attended by a negro boy when he was shot through the head and instantly killed, by a Mexican, in the Texas regiment. The man was delivered over to the civil authorities and his trial is to take place today, from what we can hear, he assigns no motive for this atrocious murder. Dr. McDonough says he heard that the Mexican said he had sworn to kill the first child or woman he met, but this seems to me not worthy of consideration as a motive, for he must have met women and children before, when he had been in Monroe several days. The little boy belongs to an afflicted family, his Mother and a brother died very suddenly last summer, and now the only remaining son is taken by such a dreadful death. The shock almost killed his Grand mother, his Father was absent at the time.
The cold weather still continues, we have not had such a long “bad
spell of weather” this winter, this has been the pleasantest day, but
that is not by any means pleasant, for this morning the thermometer stood
at 20°, and I don't think it is much, if any, warmer now, it has been
freezing all day in my dressing room. Yesterday was a dreadful day (as
for weather I mean) cold and dark and even a little snowy in the morning,
though but few flakes fell. I felt quite happy though, for we had such a pleasant morning in the school room, not a single fit of bad temper and
every lesson perfect; I commenced keeping an account of lessons and behaviour and was so glad to be able to give all a perfect mark; today it was very well
little impatient and George quite refractory in
his first lesson, though very good in his last, so I was obliged to give
them imperfect marks. I was very sorry on Lory's account, for I think
he tried to do well, but it is very hard for him to control his temper,
he did not like it at all, but I thought if I did not distribute the marks
perfectly justly they would soon lose their value. Dr. Dabbs spent the
night with us Monday, he came out quite early in the evening. Oh such a
man as he is, so tall and large, he is a head taller than Father, and large
in proportion, with heavy beard and moustachios now quite iron gray, the
children looked upon with something like awe; I like him quite well, though
such a
Dr. McDonough spent last evening with us, he has an assistant now at
the hospital, and consequently his labours are somewhat lightened, he
seemed in very good spirits last night and the evening was quite pleasant.
There is the supper bell and I must go, I have already written more than
The cold still continues unabated since I wrote last, though we have
had so many sunshiny days. I don't remember such another continuous, clear
cold in my short experience. The other night we were quite surprised by
a visit from Dr. Cummings; Miss Mary, Willie and I were in the parlour, Miss Mary was reading to Lory and Willie and I were playing (how dignified)
when some one rapped on the door. I thought it was Eva come to “fool” us
and threw the door wide open with a “come in, Miss Eva,” when I could see
in the darkness I discovered Dr. McDonough and was still more surprised
when he said “Dr. Cummings, Miss Sarah” and then only I perceived his large figure looking up in the background. We had quite a pleasant evening, and
Dr. Cummings at Mother's invitation spent the night with us, as they were
very much crowded at the hospital; we also had a Texas soldier to spend the night with us.
Miss Mary went to town today to see Mrs. DeLary, she has concluded not
to take any more lessons for the present, as the roads and weather are so
bad. They have a steam ferry at Trenton now, it is managed by a detail of soldiers Miss Mary said they were very polite to her, and the landing
was very good indeed. I must hurry and get to bed for it is quite late,
Willie returned from Millhaven today. I have been busy all day mending and
Father made the last.
I hoped this morning that we should at last have a fine day, when I
rose the sun was not yet up, but the blue sky was streaked with beautiful,
rosy clouds, and the golden glow on the horizon showed the ground all whitened with a heavy frost, the sun rose brilliantly and the early morning was
glorious with bright sunshine and the fresh wind, but about 12 o'clock
the sky was suddenly overcast, and since then we have not seen the sun.
I was so
John and George have both caught very bad colds, and George was quite
sick yesterday and not well enough to come to school today. Loring also
has a bad cold. Lory has improved very much since New Years, has not had
but one of his fits of anger, though temper has several times been severely tried, the other day he was quite provoked about his geography lesson, and
even threatened to run away, but he grew ashamed and could not help smiling
There has been a new conscript law passed calling out all men from sixteen to fifty five; at least so it is reported; this will take Father. I don't know what we shall do without either him or Willie, it would not be so bad if it were not probable that the Yankees will be here this winter; and I would not so much mind doing without them both if they were on the other side of the river.
Willie is preparing to join his company, (the Tensas cavalry, under Harrison) now, and will leave as soon as he is ready; he did not get a substitute, partly because on thinking it over he thought it not best, and partly because he could, there was some trouble about the final ratification of the papers, and we hear that there are to be no more substitutes, those that have them are to have their money restored by government and be called out themselves. Some rumour is heard of a proposition of peace from the Federal government, but I am afraid it is only a rumour. Oh if it were peace, honourable peace, how rejoiced we should all be.
Miss Mary and Eva met Mr. Bowmar Barr in the road yesterday evening,
he said his Mother and sisters sent their love but had not time to write;
Jenny had been very ill with the measles, was just a little better when he
The sunshine is gleaming through the window, and I hope it is the fair promise of a fair day tomorrow.
I have not been able to write for several days past, my usual time,
just before supper, when it gets too dark to work or read has been otherwise occupied; I have been arranging Valeria's letters into little books so that
I can read them easily, I find it some little comfort to read them over and
over again, though sometimes they contain sentences that sadden me by bringing the past too vividly to my mind. I have been busy since Friday afternoon
sewing a palmetto hat for Mrs. Temple, of course I could not work at
it this morning as we were in school, but I have been busy all this evening,
and am discouraged tonight at the ill success of my day's work. I believe
I will take it out and sew it over again. Yesterday I could hardly sit up
I felt so weak and ill, and today I have a great soreness in my chest when
I cough, as I do quite often; tired and sick and ill tempered! a bad picture indeed, it fades however in this quiet room, bright with firelight, and in
groom “Yellow Antony” with him, a sober and quiet
man who has attended Willie's a horse ever since we started to Georgia, and
who is very anxious to go to “the war” with him.
Last week Col. Harrison sent here to ask Mother to take Mrs. Harrison
I read last night in the “Diary of Mad. D'Arblay,” “Dr. Johnston says
an hour may be tedious but cannot be long,” this day certainly has not been
long, but it has been tedious. Our colds were all so bad that we did not
have school. Miss Mary was so ill last night that I was quite anxious
about her, but she was better this morning, and is still improving, my
cold is very bad, though better than hers. I have been working on Mrs.
Temple's hat all day, and it is now finished, all except one round which
I shall do tonight, it is now a very good shape, and I am very glad indeed
that I ripped it. Father shod “Caesar” this evening, I was, of course, out
to see it; the horse is much better than I expected. Father is very tired
tonight, no wonder, he is not well and has been working hard all day. The
sun shone out brightly today, and I hope the roads will soon be good enough
for us to take a ride. I have been waiting so long for good weather.
It is evening, the close of a bright, beautiful day, we have had
delightful weather for some days, today it was very pleasant by an open
window, it has been such a pleasant day to me too, but I must go back a little
to explain it. In my last journal I said that we were all too sick to have
On our return we found Mrs. Lemay and Miss Eliza Baker with Mrs.
Stevens, Miss Eliza Baker has such a lovely face, such a pensive, sweet expression that I like to look at her, she came to see me and asked me to
come to their house when I came in town, I certainly shall do so. We invited
Mrs. Kenison to come out with us and after dinner we bade Mrs. Stevens
This morning the sun rose bright and clear and we congratulated each other on the pleasant morning and the pleasant ride we had in perspective, and pleasant it proved to be, our horses all went so well, Mollie did not limp at all and Railroad paced like the wind. Mrs. Kenison and Mary had quite an exciting race coming home, but Railroad paced far ahead of Pompey's gallop. I was afraid of hurting Mollie's leg and came on behind, so I had a full prospect. We rode up via Mrs. Phillip's high hill and had a fine view of the valley and the woods, it was very pretty, though the fields were brown and bare and there was no green except that of the ever bright pine.
When we came home it was eleven o'clock and we rested and looked at
pictures and talked or read until dinner. Mother was not able to come to
dinner, she has taken a dreadful cold like the rest of us and it gave her
Father finished Willie's bridle yesterday, it is such a nice one and the bits are so bright and pretty; Willie's last coat came from the tailor's today; it is only cut; as soon as it is made he will be ready. Oh, how sadly those words sound they make my heart sink within me, but this is not the feeling I must cherish.
We have had no school this week, Miss Mary has been to Dr. Temple every morning, Eva has been sick and Mother indisposed, and we have been getting Willie ready, everything is done now, tomorrow he leaves us for camp, oh if it were a different service, an honourable service he is going to enter upon, but to be here, inactive in camp, with no prospect of usefulness, how often I say if we had only got to Georgia; but I am glad Willie did not get a substitute.
Today we were surprised by the sight of a strange carriage driving into the yard, and more surprised when we found that the occupant was not Mrs. Harrison but Mrs. Bondurant; her husband said he had gone to Minden unexpectedly and his wife was so anxious to come down that he thought he would try and get us to take her until he could find a place for her in Monroe, Mother could hardly refuse and so she came in, I don't like her much as yet, but my opinions so often change that I attach little consequence to first impressions.
Dr. McDonough came over yesterday evening, brought his successor at the hospital, Dr. Furness. Dr. McDonough is to go up to Mt. Lebanon with Dr. Powell. I shall be sorry for him to go, am just beginning to get well acquainted with him, and he improves on acquaintance; this Dr. Furness is a young man, I expect quite pleasant too, but cannot form an opinion from one evening when I only saw his face by candle-light. Mrs. Bondurant spoke of him today, said she thought him fine looking, he is large and well formed but I thought his face very ugly.
The fine weather still continues, today it is almost as warm as summer. I have been setting out some jessamines, am so in hopes they will live, though I am afraid they are planted too late. Miss May has been braiding a hat for Dr. McDonough and I am now sewing it, have it almost finished.
Saturday night. Willie left Thursday the 28th. as he had intended
for the camp but not to stay; he was all ready equipped as a cavalry man.
Father had soldered an old canteen and tin cup for him, his clothes were
finished and ready to put on and Mother was making a wallet for Antony;
when Capt. Oliver the quarter master came up to the door, he wanted to get Father's and the railroad negroes and teams to employ in gathering corn
for the government. Father told him that he could not have them unless
Willie was in charge of them, and Capt. Oliver then made arrangements to
detach Willie to superintend the gathering of some corn at Millhaven.
This Willie thinks will occupy him about a month during which time he will
Mrs. Bondurant left today, has procured a room at Mr. Oliver's old place, now occupied by a Capt. Marble, a refugee, it is nearer the camp and therefore more convenient than this.
Mr. Haddicks, the courier who went home, returned yesterday. The weather has continued fair and warm till today, it commenced to rain this morning and still rains. I have been writing letters to Aunt Mary and Grandma today, and telling them about our journey has made me think of it more than usual; how strange it seems for us to be sitting quietly in this old place after so many and such various plans for moving. I also wrote to Miss Gussie Harrison again to try and find out where the Ridgills are, it seems a very slight ground for hope to find them out, but even the slight hope cheers me. I think the man by whom John Davis sent my other letter fell into the hands of the Yankees; I am very much afraid none of these letters will reach the destination. I am obliged to take the chance of sending them by a chance traveller, and do not know even when I shall have this opportunity.
This is such a beautiful day, “so cool, so clear, so bright,” after
we had finished school this morning I had an hour or more before, for as
Miss Mary went to the dentist we finished the studies quite soon, and I
spent the time out in the garden where Father is pruning the fruit trees
undercurrent in him.
The other night after we had sung “Annie Laurie” he got to speaking about
the song and incidents connected with it. Miss Mary and he and I were
sitting rather apart and as he always speaks in a very low voice the
conversation of the others flowed by us; he told us a story of a young man
who had loved and lost a beautiful young girl and was left by his misfortune
What has happened since I wrote last, it will take me some time to
think of everything and would take longer to write it if I were honest
enough or had time enough to tell of all the varied shadows dark and bright which have passed over me. The weather has been delightful and I have spent several hours every day in the garden, where Father and one or two Negroes
have been busy all the week, sowing seed, clearing off beds and planting
Mr. Gordon stayed untill this morning when he left for Millhaven.
Yesterday morning he came into the parlour while I was giving Eva her music lesson and when I had finished he commenced talking about the Terrys and
told me that Temp (the oldest son) was now in Texas, a hospital surgeon,
and he went on to say that if I wished to write to any of them, he, Mr.
Gordon, could send a letter for me, through a Dr. Haydn, a friend of his,
who had offered to send any letters across the river for him by the couriers
Wednesday night Dr. McDonough came over, we were glad to see him, as we always are, and the evening was very pleasant, he was so much interested in Annie Laurie that he overcame his bashfulness sufficiently to sing it with Miss Mary, in order to show her how to repeat the last line. I like his voice very much, it is a great improvement to the song, gives it so much more fervor and strength.
Yesterday afternoon Miss Mary and I went down to see Mrs. Bondurant
and Mrs. Marble, found them both at home. Mrs. Marble seems a very quiet
pleasant little lady, has been there ever since November and no one had
ever been to see her, she was quite lonely, having no children, and husband
at the camp all day, we did not know she was there, or should certainly
Our ride was quite a laughable one, we had a lazy mule in the buggy on whom all Loring's whipping and Jerking produced not the slightest effect except to make her jump out to one side of the road when it required all his strength to turn her in again. Miss Mary found it so tiresome that she left Lory and I in the buggy alone and walked quite a distance, at one time Lory got so tired and angry that he jumped out of the buggy and holding the reins in his hands lashed old Carry until she struck up a sharp trot, and he was obliged to run to keep up with her. When he thought he had whipped her enough to ensure better behaviour he got into the buggy again, neither Miss Mary nor I could speak we were so convulsed with laughter, and a negro man who came up during the performance was very much amused. Notwithstanding all Lory's efforts the old mule checkened her trot to a slow walk as soon as he came back into the buggy. Lory exclaimed in vexation, “Oh Sister Sarah, if I wasn't afraid some white person would come along the road I would get out and run Carry again but it looks so funny I won't do it,” he is very much afraid of ridicule and became quite angry with Miss Mary and I when we first left home because we could not help laughing at him and the mule.
We were joyfully surprised by Willie's return Friday night, we were the more surprised as he had just sent us word that he should not come until late in the night or until the next day. He sent us by Eldridge some geese and some butter, the last made from the milk of his cows down at Millhaven.
Willie left us again this morning. We had a very pleasant morning in school, the children all did very well, Loring was a little provoked about his spelling but soon overcame it. It has been a long time since he has been in one of his violent passions with me. Dr. McDonough and Dr. Furness came over yesterday after supper. Only stayed a short time. Dr. Furness twisted and turned about as if he were very uncomfortable, and I could scarcely keep my eyes open I was so sleepy, and Dr. McDonough had not much to say, so the evening was not very pleasant. There was a very sick man over at the Hospital so they could not stay long, Mr. Haddicks said they expected him to die today, poor fellow! how I pity them, it must be so hard to die in a hospital. I must stop writing from necessity, my ink is all used up, it is some Dr. McD. gave me, and I have no more fit to use. I am ashamed to ask for any more, though the Dr. is so kind he would not hesitate to give it to me.
The other evening after I finished writing, I walked out in the hall and saw the children all in the grove, playing so merrily that I went out to join them, we played “puss in the corner” until we were tired and then as we were dancing around singing “Sweet beans and barley grows” Miss May saw a buggy coming out, and telling the rest of us we all stopped to wonder who it could be, it was Mr. Gordon, come to see about his teams crossing the river, the teams camped here that night and Mr. Gordon left with them the next morning.
Yesterday afternoon we went to the funeral of Mr. Moore, Mrs. Lidwell's brother, who died Monday evening. The funeral was very small, there were but three or four besides the mourners; Miss Mary and I did not go to the house as we had no conveyance (our buggy and ambulance were used by the family) but we walked to the grave which is only about a mile and a half from here. George and Loring went with us, we arrived about two hours before the funeral procession came and the time of quiet waiting prepared me to feel the sadness of the scene, the burying ground has no enclosure of any sort around it, there are a few graves, each surround either by a neat paling, a rude rail fence or a little sort of roof built over it, the dead leaves lie thickly over the ground, over head the pines sigh a low requiem which alone breaks the stillness and takes away from the desolation of this rude and lonely spot, in sight is the rude Church blackened by time and now all fallen into ruin. I was deeply touched by the sight of some sweet violets blooming on a mosey grave. Poor Miss Anna Moore, the tears came in spite of my efforts to restrain them when I saw her silent weeping and thought how desolate, how lonely she was in seeing the last remains of her Father lowered into the grave.
Today is Ash Wednesday, we had school this morning, but I took no dinner and spent several hours this afternoon alone with my bible and my thoughts, thoughts sad enough when I reflect on my many, many faults, on the times when I swerve from my right path. I had no ink when I wrote before, this is little better than none. I mixed the dregs of my inkstand with some watery stuff I had and used before I got the other, it is too dark to see any longer, must put up my book.
We have spent such a pleasant day, Dr. McDonough has been with us
from soon after breakfast until a few minutes ago, and he and Miss Mary
have been singing ad practising a great deal of the time. Last night
he and Dr. Furness spent the evening with us, and Dr. D. appointed this
morning as a practising time, so we expected him and did not go into
school, he came accompanied by Mr. Kimball, a great surprise to me. I
had never met him but twice before, and then only by accident, he only
stayed about fifteen minutes, said he wanted to get to Vienna tonight,
he brought me a message from, as he said, an old friend of mine, Miss
Sallie Brantley, it was that she sent her best love and an urgent invitation
to come and see her; I feel quite acquainted with Miss Sallie
Brantley though I have never seen her I have heard her spoken of so often.
Mr. Henry Reynolds (brother of Loring's god father) and Capt. Thomas
also called but did not come in. Mr. Reynolds called to know if I had
heard recently from his sister, Mrs. Veader, gave me two letters he had
just received from her. I was glad to hear from her and to know that
she is well. Mr. Reynolds said that if I would direct letters to Savannah,
via Shreveport, putting five ten cent stamps on it, it would probably go
safely by mail. I am so glad to find any way to send a letter.
This is the last page of my journal book, a book which has been with
me and been my faithful confidant in so many scenes and in so many different
moods, I don't know what I should do without my journal, it is such a
relief to me to write here; and this book will always be of peculiar
interest to me as the one which holds the record of our eventful, of our
Willie came home Friday night quite unexpectedly, he was in Monroe hauling corn across the river,
went away early the next morning. Mother spent Friday with Mrs. Seale, brought as some Magnolia
seed, I have not planted them yet. Saturday morning I set our plants, or rather the roots, out on the
shelves, I don't know whether they will revive; my geranium is dead. I was going to set it in the
garden, but on taking it up found the roots quite rotten. I was not very well Saturday, and this
discovery of my poor dead flower was too much for me, it made me so sad, it seemed to me to
foretell evil to my friend from whom it took
Saturday evening Mr. Baxter came, he is an old gentleman from Georgia, not personally known to
Father though they are mutually acquainted by reputation, and have corresponded; he and his wife
stayed all night here a year ago, while Father was in Virginia, and he stopped the other evening
to know if we had heard from him, but finding Father at home and it being late Saturday evening, he
accepted Father's invitation to remain with us
Sunday morning I was so ill and weak I was obliged to lie down for an hour or two after breakfast,
was much benefitted by my rest and well enough to eat heartily of roast duck at dinner, when Dr.
McDonough joined us, he returned to the hospital in the afternoon but rejoined us after tea, to
tell us goodbye, but while here he received letters from Dr. Furness (who is on a visit to Mt.
Lebanon) telling him that Dr. F. had obtained leave for him to remain here until he came back,
probably about Thursday. I found myself scarcely able to sit up in the evening, and though the
company was very pleasant I rejoiced when we came to our room. Monday Mother was confined to
her bed with a bad headache resulting from cold, this prevented our having school. We were quite
lonesome with Mother sick and Father and Willie away. Father went to Millhaven Monday morning,
is not coming back till tomorrow. After dinner Dr. McDonough came over, gave me some ideas on
drawing and colouring and made me desire to learn to draw more earnestly than ever. Miss Mary and
he practised an hour or two, commenced to learn
I can write no longer now, am going this evening to see Miss Anna Moore.
Oh it is so cold, I have just returned from a walk in the garden with Father and though I was well
wrapped up I was painfully cold when I came,
ours are not.
Tuesday evening on my return from Mrs. Lidwell's I found Mrs. Bondurant and Mrs. Marble here,
before they left a negro boy came up to know if two ladies could stay all night, after some little
demurring Mother consented to take them, they were Mrs. Moore and her daughter Miss Nichols,
refugees form Tensas parish. Mrs. Bondurant was slightly acquainted with them and they had a
great deal to tell and to hear; we found that we had stopped in front of their house about five
minutes one day while we were travelling and this circumstance, slight as it was, made us feel less like
strangers; they had a dreadful time coming through the swamp, broke down once, five or six
miles from any house, and had to ride that distance on mules with only a
shawl for a saddle; they were quite pleasant. Miss Lucy Nichols was very young and
very small and very affected, appeared like a spoiled only daughter among
three older brothers, but very good humoured and lively. The next morning Mrs. Moore charged me
repeatedly to make Willie get acquainted with her sons, “one a Lieutenant in the Tensas cavalry,
and one in the commissary department,” and her last words were to Willie, repeating the same
charge; her Lieut. and her commissary are equally indifferent to me.
After Mrs. Moore left Mother started for Monroe to meet Father, she took Georgie with her. We
had all assembled in the parlour for school,
cow peas for dinner with some fried
eggs for an entree, it was all we had and he seemed quite content. The evening was so chill and cloudy
that we could not ride. Dr. Rolls sent for Dr. McD. in the afternoon near dark. It was late when
Father and Mother and little Georgie came home, they were very cold. Doctor McDonough spent the
evening. This morning we had school again, all my scholars behaved well, and consequently I feel
quite bright tonight. I had a good time for reading this evening, have been interrupted for several days.
Have just returned from a ride with the Dr., he came over this morning to ask if I could go this
evening. I had just sent Mollie away this morning and thought I could not go, but the Dr. proposed my
riding on Dr.
The birthday of Washington, an anniversary sacred to the memory of freedom. Alas, how is it
now polluted, this is the day appointed by the infamous Banks for his election for Governor and
other State officers of Louisiana, a mere farce; the flimsiness of the pretence must be apparent to
every mind, for the legislative assembly is to have full power, except where its decrees conflict the will
of Lincoln, made known as he shall see fit by proclamations from time to time. Oh that we could free
ourselves from this bondage, from this disgraceful, this heavy yoke, when will the
We children are quite alone today, Father and Mother have gone to Monroe. Dr. McDonough left Monday morning, we miss him so much, he was here so constantly before he left, spent the day and evening with us Sunday, we parted with sincere regret on both sides. Mr. Peterson came out yesterday, took dinner with us, brought “Life on the Ocean wave,” which he had copied for Miss Mary, he copies so nicely; spoke of his baby, says he thinks it is the greatest treasure in the world.
The weather in fine and warm again, I hope we shall have no more cold. Mother, Miss May and I went to Mrs. Craig's yesterday evening, something was said about our school, when Mrs. Craig asked me if I did not want another scholar, she was in jest, but told her in earnest that if she would send Margaret I would do my best for her, she is just Miss May's age, and a nice, sensible girl, I like her very much, she is so plain and industrious and intelligent too.
We had quite an excitement here yesterday evening, I was sitting reading when I heard a
terrible scream from Georgie. Mother and I were both frightened and started up, I ran with
several of the servants to the place from whence the screams came and found George up in
the other grove with Mr. Heddicks and Loring, they had erected a machine called a flying
horse, consisting of a pole supported on a stake by a pin which allowed it
The fine weather still continues, I have been eager to get out in the garden all day but have not been
at liberty until now. Have felt quite “lazy” all day and very dreamy, had a very vivid dream this
morning just before rising of my dear friend Valeria, and have been thinking of her all day, it seems
to me I can see her before me, and very often in spite of my sober reason when I lift up my eyes I
expect to see her beloved form, this morning when I was thinking of her it seemed to me a long,
narrow vista opened before me and in the distance was her familiar figure as clear and full as when I
last saw her more than three years ago; how vivid my imagination is, sometimes these
impressions are so powerful that I feel like ascribing to them a kind of spiritual reality.
Mother brought me a little bunch of violets and geranium leaves from May Stevens the other day,
her geranium is putting out finely, I want to go in and get a cutting from her, but we have but three
mules here, one is sick and the other two are ploughing. Dr. Furness spent the evening here the
other day, was quite agreeable. I keep thinking whenever I see him of his neglect of the soldiers,
these couriers here say that he does not care
I rose this morning long before day and have some leisure time before breakfast to write. Last night we were joyfully surprised by Willie's coming home, we did not expect him for several days, poor fellow he was quite troubled, had worked very hard to get back to Monroe before “the twilight” should make another trip, on account of some of the railroad negroes who were on her, and who were very much dissatisfied, but when he got to Monroe he found that the twilight had come and gone, and that four of the negroes had left her at Monroe, two Willie thinks may have gone entirely, the other two he supposes to be at Millhaven. Willie had promised his squad to give them a holiday at Millhaven as a reward for their hard work, but when he went to the government clerk to get the order, he found him locked up, playing cards, and when he got access to him he would not give him the necessary order. Then Willie had no horse to come out on, he went all over Monroe and Trenton and could neither hire nor borrow one, then being in a last extremity, he went to Capt. Seale's and Lucy lent him her pony, he arrived at home about eight o'clock, quite tired; is obliged to go to Vienna today to see Capt. Oliver about the negroes, and we have nothing here to ride but three lazy mules, to ride any of them would be torture. Willie will have to borrow or hire a horse from Dr. Temple, and he hates to borrow a horse.
The weather has changed so suddenly, yesterday morning it was very
Margaret Craig came Saturday for me to alter her hat as I promised,
I went to immediately and finished lining, trimming and all some hours
before dark. I succeeded beyond my hopes, it was the prettiest shaped
brim I have ever made, and as Miss Edgeworth would say, was vastly becoming to Margaret. We have Mrs. Temple's backgammon board and chess men
now, and Father and I are learning to play chess, we are learning from
the Encyclopaedia Brittanica, were so fascinated with it Saturday night
that we did not read any but sat up till after ten playing chess; ten is
a very late hour for us. Poor little Georgie had a chill Friday night
and the fever never left him till late Saturday evening, he looks very
badly, but escaped his chill last night. I hope he may get better now,
his leg is improving, he walked on it a good deal yesterday, but in the
evening complained very much of his knee, which was much swollen.
Willie returned very unexpectedly last night, he had sent a note to me in the evening saying that he
would not be able to come before his next trip on the boat, and that we must send Antony down
with his clothes, but last night after supper we heard his well known whistle, and his “walk, walk”
to Pompey. The government clerk in Monroe had received news that the Yankees were
coming up to Harrisonburg, and that he must move the government stores from Monroe a
few miles back in the country. Willie left
Dr. Furness came over last night, we were just finishing supper, and as Father and I had been
playing chess, our nearly finished game was left on the stand. As I was putting the men away Dr.
Furness naturally said something about playing chess and Father proposed we should take a
game. I checkmated him, whether by his indulgence or not I don't know. Today is Miss Mary's
sixteenth birthday and the children have begged a holiday, so I am free to follow my own devices. I
finished the last volume of Cosmos yesterday, have been more than a year reading it, it has given
me a great deal of pleasure and information though there are several parts which I cannot now
understand, by reason of my imperfect knowledge, much that he says about magnetism was
beyond my range, and about geology too, I mean pure geology, the names of the different kinds of
rock and their classification; but there is one thing the book has done for me without doubt it has
made me feel a sincere respect, admiration, and if I might so far presume, a love for its
authour, the very name of Humboldt seem grand to me. Now that I have finished Cosmos, I
shall read more in my french than I have lately done, and I hope soon to commence my
Blair's rhetoric that has been tantalizing me on my shelf for so long, the study of language and of
composition is delightful to me.
I did not know till just now that it had been so long since I wrote
here. I don't remember all the remarkable events that have taken place in
that time, and shall not attempt to recount them. Mary Stevens and Miss
Sarah Garrett made their long anticipated visit to me on Thursday. I
was very glad to see them, and enjoyed the day very much, Mary took me
quite by surprise by saying that I was to go home with her, however on
considering that it was Thursday and that I should enjoy a visit to town
very much, I concluded not to oppose her design, we had a delightful ride
in, the evening was
Played chess while I was in town with John Stevens, he don't know how
I forgot to say that I went to church on Sunday, heard good and fervent sermon from Mr. McGuire, Mary's Grandfather; it is the first time I ever heard him preach, he was with as at Grandma Wadley's burial and I thought of that when I heard his voice in prayer, I could not restrain my tears when he prayed for “all our absent friends wherever they may be or whatever their situation,” there was one in my thoughts as she ever is, where is she, where is she!
On my return home I found a note waiting me from Mrs. Morancy, affectionate as her letters always are. I have some friends that I know love me very much and I return their affection, but I can always think of some friend they love better than me, with Valeria I “am esteemed and loved more than any other friend she has, or can have,” she wrote me those words and I believe them as much as I believe that long before she told me that, she was my one friend.
We commenced school again yesterday, all the children did well, and they have done so today too,
except that I had a little bit of trouble about Loring's reading; he is now reading Abbott's history of
Alexander, it is true there are a good many long words in it, but with a little help he can
disobligingness”
he had, and when I called him to read, began to talk about how everybody was cross to him
and how he would not be kind to him if I would always be encouraging sister May to be cross to
him, and finally begun reading by jerking out each word in a slow, sullen tone which is peculiarly
irritating, but after talking to him a little while and telling I should certainly speak to Mother if he did not
improve in his manner of reading, he commenced and read five or six pages well and with great
interest, his usual lesson is three pages, and when he had finished that I was about to close the
book, what was my delighted surprise to hear that he wanted to read more, it was the story
of Bucephalus and he was much interested. Speaking of Bucephalus reminds me that Willie has
sold, or rather “swapped” his fine horse Caesar with Dr. Temple, he won't let the Dr. come
near him. I was so much amused the morning after Willie sold him, Miss Mary and I were
sitting in the parlour reading when them came a “Hello” at the door. Miss Mary went out and
found a negroe boy with the petition, “please ma'am Dr. Temple says will Mr. Wadley
please send a hand up there to help catch that horse Mars Willie sold him this morning.”
Dr. Temple had bought the horse, but he had not bought Antony.
Willie has lost his pony, he went off the boat one night and before Willie could get out went
off in a run, he thinks he will certainly get him again, I hope so, he is such a fine pony and so necessary to Willie now.
We were surprised yesterday evening by a visit from Dr. McDonough, we were all in the
parlour, Father and I were engrossed in chess, Mother was knitting and Miss Mary playing
and singing for the courier, who had asked to hear her, when the knock came. Mr. Haddox
who was sitting next to the door, answered it. I thought I knew the voice but would not say
so, I have been so often mistaken in voices and steps lately; we were all heartily glad
to see the doctor, he looked jaded and ill, no wonder, had been riding a day and a night in
the stage; he is going down to Delhi to settle up his business with Mr. Smith's wife. Mr.
Smith has gone away to Vicksburg and is in the employment of the Yankee government. Dr.
McDonough feels very badly about it, they were intimate friends. We kept the Dr. with us
all night, he retired early on account of his headache and fatigue. Eva, Miss Mary and I were
sitting alone in the parlour when we heard the tone of his companions' mind and manners can scarcely fail
of having some effect upon him; I love him so well, my dear kind brother! he left immediately after
breakfast this morning, don't know when he can come back. The Yankee gunboats are in Red river,
and the Twilight keeps her steam up ready to run up to Camillen if they approach nearer. We hear
rumours of a threatened attack on Alexandria, and of a great victory gained by Lee over Butler in
Virginia, but everything in uncertain.
We have such dreadful weather since I wrote last, it commenced on Saturday which was a dull,
gloomy day and quite chilly, but Saturday night we had a most violent storm of wind and rain
and the morning dawned cold and cloudy, growing more cloudy and cold as the day wore on, with
occasional falls of rain, the night came on with a cold, slow rain, which increased to a storm. Monday
it was very cold all day, and about dusk we were electrified by the sight of falling snow! this changed
into a driving, sleety rain, but this morning when I rose from my bed, Rose, who was making my firs
up the hillsides, wherever
a few boards or logs furnished a resting place, the roofs were all white,
and by the glimmering twilight I could an the snow lay on the great arms
and tiny twigs of the oaks, forming a contrast to the yellow blossoms
which I knew were there though I could not see them. Snow on the 22nd. of March, I could scarcely believe it! As the morning light advanced the
dogwoods and the snow vied with each other in whiteness, but the sun rose clear and brilliant to our glad vision so long wearied with clouds and darkness
and the snow disappeared like frost work, the dripping from the roofs sounded
like rain, it was so strange and pretty to see the clear, fast falling drops
shining and changing in the sunlight, it is not warm yet, but is pleasanter
than it has been for several days, once more we all say “Oh I hope this
will be the last of the cold weather,” I hope it so much. Bright, beautiful
Spring when will you come again, how long will you sicken me with hope deferred, all winter I have sighed for Spring, but I am afraid we shall see
her shorn of some of her many beauties when she comes at last, this
alternately cold and warm weather is spoiling all the flowers, as well as fruits.
Willie spent the night with us Saturday, was obliged to go to Fordsville on government business Sunday morning but came back to dinner.
Father is making some gloves for himself, out of some very nice buckskin which he had
dressed on the place. I think he will have a very comfortable, serviceable pair of gloves. I wanted to
help him make them, and had intended to do so, but a most inconvenient rising came on my
thimble
I have been making a pair of corsets lately which have taken a good deal of time and trouble,
I cut them out from a pair of Mother's without ripping them up, and think they fit very well, taking this into consideration, they will fit very nicely indeed when I have made a little alteration which I contemplate.
We have commenced reading Dickens' “Old Curiosity Shop” aloud. I like it very much but
should like it better were the horrid, disgusting Quilp left out, or at least modified, are there
really any such monsters in mind, heart, and person all combined? I hope not, I cannot
believe there are. What a beautiful story is that of Little Nell and the Old man, so pathetic
in
The evening of Good Friday, I spent the morning as usual in school, George and Loring
both gave as some trouble, and tired me very much, the
so
weak and my mind too. I have just been walking a little in the garden to rest myself but my
head feels so weary.
Mother and I went to spend the day at Mrs. Seale's yesterday, I did not want to go but Father
wished it, the wind was high, and keen as a sharp sword and it blew directly in our faces, so that
the ride was very disagreeable, but I was very glad we went for we saw Willie, he was just
starting for Camden, we saw him only a few minutes, he looked so well and was so kind, expects
to leave the boat at Camden and return by land. It is reported that the Yankees will be here before
many days, but some think they will go to Shreveport, and leave Monroe unvisited. Was there ever
such a dark period in a nation's history before, sometimes it seems that all is dark, all is east of the
Mississippi, the soldiers are deserting by scores, the officers are most of them cowards or knaves and
the people seem to have lost patriotism, even the shadow of patriotism; to be high in rank in
this army is almost synonymous for high in corruptness, to the east of the Mississippi lies our only
stay, our only hope. I hope all from there, but we hear nothing but vague rumours; I hope strongly,
but the end seems afar off and in my darker hours I am tempted to believe it uncertain.
The last hours of Easter Sunday are passing away, it has been a happy
After breakfast the children had gone down into the garden, I went there too for a few of the white violets that grow so plentifully near the little water course that runs at the foot of the hill, there I found Georgie and together we walked up to Grandma's grave, we sat down on the leaves, leaning against a tree, and listened to the continual anthem of the wind among the pines. My heart was filled with grateful happiness as I listened and as I felt the warm rays of the sun, the budding trees and shrubs looked high against the blue sky and the little birds twittered their sabbath songs from branch and twig. Loring and Eva saw us from the garden and came to join us, we sat there some time, talking of Christ and the resurrection, solemn but happy themes, as we walked slowly to the house we met Miss Mary and John, and stopped to gather some of the little “turkey berries” at the foot of the beech tree; their red colour delighted the little ones. My little bunch of violets had been increased by so many and various gifts that I had a pretty boquet when I reached home. The morning was spent in reading the service and the bibles, and in rest which fell into sleep for about quarter of an hour, I found myself refreshed by my little sleep and after dinner read a short sermon, then talked and read to the children and then we took our bible and prayer books up to Grandma's grave, where I read them the affecting story of Christ's judgement and crucifixion out of the Gospel of St. John, they learned some verses and then we took a very
The month is going out in stormy wind an it came in, how it sighs and
whistles round the house, just as it has done all day, blowing the sand
and leaves in whirlwinds, it seems as if it must blight every bud and
blossom, but in spite of it spring is now coming in earnest, the dogwoods
are bleaching whiter and whiter every day and the beautiful and varied
green of the young foliage brightens the hillside. Father and I took a
ride yesterday evening, gathered some jessamines and I returned with my
hands full of the graceful, fragrant wreaths. I love the yellow jessamine
so much, I am rejoiced to see some tiny green buds coming out on those I
planted in February; the buds are coming out on our few rose bushes too,
and the violets are again blooming. If this cold, blustering wind will
only cease with March, and make place for the gentle April showers, all
will be well; I never saw a more disagreeable March, there have not been
more than three calm days in the whole month. Today just after dinner I thought we were going to have a violent storm, the clouds gathered very darkly in the west and the wind swayed the tall pines like reeds, oh how beautiful the yellow oak tops and the fresh green of the gum trees looked against the dark
I am getting to be quite a milliner, if misfortunes should reduce me thus far, might set up a shop after a short apprenticeship. Father and I rode to Mrs. Wynne's Saturday evening, in the course of conversation she mentioned that she wanted me to fix over her little daughter's hat, wanted it turned down like Margaret Craig's, on hearing that it was Leghorn I thought I could do nothing with, but little Mattie's face turned so grave and her Mother had such a disappointed air as she said she must smooth out the ribbon and put it on again herself, I thought I would try and do what I could. I was at work on it nearly all of yesterday afternoon, for the ribbon required much smoothing and even washing, but after all it looks like quite a pretty little hat now. Mrs. Mays asked Mother the other day if she would come up and spend the day if I would show her how to sew her palmetto hat, that will be equivalent to doing it myself. I have read two or three lectures in my rhetoric, it so delightful to me.
I have been playing chess this evening and reading so long in the “Old Curiosity Shop” that my eyes are quite tired and I feel as if Richard Swiveller's ‘balmy’ could descend very gently on my heavy lids.
I have not had time to write any here since the month came in, on the first we had, as usual, plenty of “April fools,” some very successful, others very nonsensical. Saturday was a very happy day, the brightness and the warmth of the weather made us incline to joyfullness, and then about ten o'clock in the morning we were delightfully surprised by Willie's coming, he was in fine health and good spirits, and we were so glad to see him. In the afternoon he drove me out in the buggy to try his new mare, she trotted very well and we took a very pleasant drive indeed. Loring and I rode part of the way to Trenton with Willie, we were very sorry he could not have stayed all night.
Sunday the weather was cold, cloudy and stormy, we had a short but beautiful storm of wind and rain in the evening, after which the sun set quite clear.
Yesterday we had quite an early breakfast for Father to go down to Millhaven, we missed him very much yesterday and today, and were rejoiced when soon after dinner today we heard the buggy. Willie came with Father, is going to stay until day after tomorrow when he leaves for Homer. The Twilight is going to be returned to
Willie and I took a very pleasant ride together this evening, I always enjoy a ride with him so much, the woods are beginning to sport their spring robes now, the dogwoods which were not blighted by frost are now dazzling white in the sunlight, our hillside is brilliant with them, the jessamines are falling fast but the honeysuckles are just coming into bloom.
Father brought us some bad news today, Mr. Peterson has gone to the Yankees, I was astonished and sorry to hear it, he is not an American, and has not been here many years, this may be an excuse. We have so many disloyal persons amongst us now, the public sentiment in Louisiana is very much demoralized, patriotism is a virtue out of fashion and one that is looked askance at, the universal sentiment in that this side of the river at least, is lost to us, and there is even now and then a low murmur that we will soon be altogether subjugated. Oh, we don't think enough of what subjugation really means, far from us be such a thought. Father says he saw a man today from the other side the river who said that all were hopefull over there and fighting on with a good heart. Oh, how I wish we were there.
This may prove to have been a memorable day in our lives, for today our long deferred fears are realized, the Yankee gunboats have come up to Monroe and the Yankee pickets are out an each side of the river, we know
no particulars as to the number of boats or the men, and we can only vaguely
Thursday morning rose bright and clear, and it was only ten o'clock when our visitors came, we had a very enjoyable day. I am too sleepy now to say any more about how it passed, in the latter part of the morning the sky clouded over and soon after dinner the rain commenced and continued all the evening. I was very glad of an excuse to keep May all night, but while I rejoiced for my own sake felt badly on Mrs. Stevens' account, for she was alone with James and Louis. Mary and Mrs. Tucker went back early in the morning with an appointment from me to spend the day with her today.
I worked steadily all day at sewing Father's hat, but could not quite finish it. Last night was Willie's last night at home and we sat up quite late. This morning we were ready for our visit to town, soon after breakfast the carriage which Father has just mended drove up and Willie stood at the door to tell us goodbye, dear brother, when shall we see him again, our hearts would have been sad if we could have foreseen this Yankee expedition, as it was we thought we should see him soon again, and felt quite happy as we drove slowly along in the bright sunshine, admiring at every
The stage did not go in to Monroe this evening, was within a few miles of it when they heard the news and turned back, the only passenger on board came here to spend the night, and from him we heard that the Yankees have come. Lieut. Pugh has come in since I commenced writing, he says there are three gunboats, two barges and two transports, he is camped very near here tonight with a squad of pickets. I am so sleepy I can't write any more.
I forgot to say in my journal the other day that the couriers left here on the fifth of this month.
This has not been at all like Sunday; fatigued by the excitement and exertion of the past weeks, I slept until much later than usual this morning. Lieut. Pugh and his brother came to breakfast, which was quite late, his brother tolerably tall, with fair complexion and blue eyes and a pleasant modesty, open countenance, quite different from Lieut. Pugh who is quite small, black hair and eyes and a rather swarthy complexion, which however, does not give him a manly air, his manners are quite pert and somewhat affectedly careless, soon after breakfast Father had Prince make the ambulance ready to drive him in to Trenton with the gentleman who stayed here last night; his name is J. A. Roberts, he is going to Virginia where his friends are, had been living for a good many years in Arizona, but took refuge in Texas soon after the war commenced, his health is very bad, and he shows it. He had such a large, heavy blanket, woven by the
We grew very impatient as the hours passed on to one o'clock, it was
nearly two when Father came, accompanied by a strange man, and with his hands quite bloody, we were all excitement until he could sit down and
tell us the story. He said he had gone on very quietly until he nearly
reached Trenton, there Mr. Craig, who was very close behind, called out that he heard the Yankees were coming up to Trenton, and he turned round and came back home. Father however, thought he might as well go on and did so, when he arrived opposite Mrs. Seale's he saw a party of Yankees, thirteen in number, with some uncommissioned officer at their head, they were talking to a knot of ladies, among whom were Mrs. Seale and Lucy. Father stopped then too, and the officer began to ask him if he had seen a Confederate officer mounted on a white horse pass up the road. Father told him he had not seen a white horse since he left home. It appears that a Captain Brigham, said to be a bravo sort of a man, had been “cavorting” round below Trenton in sight of the gunboats, had been seen from them, and was the cause of this party having come on shore. After speaking to the yankee a little while Father asked Mrs. Seale if she would not like to take a ride down to the Monroe ferry, she took her bonnet and went with him. Father did not go over to Monroe, left Mr. Roberts at the ferry and returned up to Trenton. When he got up into the town he found that this party of Yankees were going into the stores and houses, not private dwellings, searching for this Captain Brigham and for arms, they found some old muskets and some rusty swords and two kegs of powder, went into the post office and took out all the letters except those addressed to ladies, (a rare act of courtesy indeed).
Father stopped up in Trenton, sat there in the ambulance to see
what was going to happen, them was a Mr. Turner in the post office who
had come down to Trenton that morning with his buggy, they took his buggy
to carry their arms and powder down to their gunboats with, Mr. Turner
asked them to send it back, they said they would not, but if he chose he
might ride down to the boat and bring it back himself, so he got in beside
the young yankee who was driving. In the mean time one or two Yankees had gone up the road a little way, and as they returned Prince (who was walking up the street) overheard them say to the commander that there were some Confederates up the road, he said they would go down and gather some horses and then go after them. Prince also overheard one say to the officer, “Why don't you take that ambulance to carry the arms down,” he replied that that gentleman was using it, and he would not trouble him. Well, having taken two horses from citizens who were there, they all went down towards Monroe, and Father and Prince faced slowly back towards home. They had advanced only a few yards when a loud report which they mistook for a gun from the boat arrested their progress, they waited for further developments, pretty soon the two horses the Yankees had taken came running back. Father
thought they had been frightened and thrown their Yankee riders, pretty
soon they heard another report, a real gun this time, and in a few moments
here came one or two of our soldiers saying they had had a skirmish. At
first Father did not believe it but Lieut. Pugh soon overtook him, and he
found that it was really so. It happened thus, as the Yankees went on down
with the buggy in front, our men, some dozen or so on horseback, dashed round
the corner and the parties met, unexpectedly I reckon to both, perhaps our
charge’, some of the men discharged their guns, the keg of powder exploded between my legs where it was sitting, the horse plunged and I jumped out. I thought I would light on my feet but came flat down on my face, and when I picked myself up and looked round I expected to see at least two or three lying dead on the ground, but not one either Yankee or Confederate was to be seen. I don't know where the Yankees went to, some of them might have jumped over the bluff, but I didn't think to look and see, and had I thought I wouldn't have looked for fear they would shoot up at me!” how the powder came to explode no one knows, or how the horse got his leg broken, it appears that none of the Yankees were hurt. One of our men was severely wounded, he was supported on his horse out to a house about three miles from Trenton. Father laid him on a bed and examined his wound, it was just above the hip. We heard yesterday evening that Dr. Whyte said it, the ball, had passed through the liver and that his recovery was doubtful; it is sad to think of a life thus lost for worse than nothing. The only effect upon the Yankees after their fright was over was to rebel soldier there again they would certainly shell the place,” rebel indeed, proud invaders, when shall we teach you the bitterness of that word again!
Mrs. Temple and Miss Anna Moore came over in the afternoon; about four o'clock we were surprised by seeing Major Waddill ride up, he had come to Monroe on business not expecting to meet the Yankees. I suppose his business is of a somewhat important and difficult sort, I don't know what. Mother and Father invited him to spend the night, he went to meet an appointment but returned about dark. Is a very elegant and agreeable gentleman, my short acquaintance with him disposed me to like him very much, he is very fond of his family, and is a great money maker, looks quite jaded, probably from fatigue and anxiety combined.
We are preparing for quite a battle an Red River now, probably it has taken place before this, I scarcely dare to hope much. Oh, if we could but gain it, it would so reanimate the sinking spirits and revive the hope that is almost dead, I mean always on this side the river, from what we hear we have no right to distrust our troops on the other side. We hear that Forrest and Morgan are again doing brilliant things, Forrest has lately taken and destroyed Paducah, Columbus, Ken. and Union City.
It was nearly dark this evening when Lucy Seale and Mrs. Norriss rode up on horseback, I was alarmed, thought they were coming here for refuge from some impending evil. Lucy looked the picture of troubled alarm, wanted to know if Father had an ox wagon, or any kind of wagon here that he could send for their trunks, they were afraid that our men might go back there and that the town would be shelled. Father had nothing but a cart, and promised to send it in tomorrow morning. Mrs. Norris had been in to Monroe, that morning, said that the gunboats were not going to stay but a very few days, the river is falling so fast as to render a longer delay dangerous.
Capt. Frank Garrett and a Lieut. Hardy were taken prisoners, were about town in citizen's dress and someone, I suppose, informed of them, it is a disgraceful thing they ought to be heartily ashamed, but Mrs. Norriss says they took it very pleasantly, probably they did not reflect that if the Yankees chose they might consider them as spies and hang them instead of parolling them an they promised, and as they very probably expected when they put themselves in the way. Father brought me a very cordial, sweet note from Miss Sallie Brantley in answer to one I wrote her inviting her to visit us, she was on the eve of starting for Minden on a visit of three months, said she would with pleasure accept the invitation when she returned home in July.
Father went into Trenton this morning in company with the cart that went for Mrs. Seale's trunks, Mrs. Seale concluded not to send them out today. Father did not go over to Monroe, says the Yankees appear to be in considerable commotion caused probably from the surprise yesterday. Father said there were a good many negores on the bank with their bundles who had run to the Yankees. He says he saw some ladies and children carrying chickens to the boat to barter for coffee. Sandy, who drove the cart, was on the bank when the skiff came on shore to get the chickens, says the Yankees gave one pound of coffee for four chickens. Sandy asked the negro who was in the skiff if any body could go on board that boat that chose, (meaning the gunboat) the negro said no, asked Sandy if he wanted to go to stay, Sandy told him no, that he had had no hand in bringing on the war, and
was not going to have anything to do with it! Maybe none of our negroes
will go, but we don't know what might happen, it would I feel be far better
for them to stay with us, but they don't know that and I don't blame them
in the least for being dazzled by the false idea of freedom, ours go on
just exactly as usual as yet, one who was hired in Monroe is gone to them
we hear, the same who got drunk and was so impertinent to Willie the day
we started to Georgia, and whom we sent back from the La Fourche.
There are six gunboats and no transports we hear now, the two that were sent up for the Twilight returned today without her, and sent up a smaller boat, I suppose of course the rest will remain until this one comes down. It is such a warm, delightful afternoon, the view from my open window is beautiful, the trees now in their prettiest spring garb, the foliage just enough developed to present charming varied tints of delicate green, and to let us look through the moving screen to new beauties beyond. The dogwoods have not yet faded, but the leaves on them are fast mingling green with the hitherto spotless white. Oh, how beautiful the earth is, well may we exclaim “man alone is vile.”
I do not feel at all well, think I must have taken cold, my face burns and my throat is quite parched, and I have a feeling of nausea and slight lightness of head, which is very disagreeable.
We went into school again this morning, after our long recess. Margaret Craig did not come as I expected, probably on account of the Yankee excitement. I do not feel at all afraid, am just beginning to realize that they are indeed in Monroe, we have no fear of their coming out this far.
I have determined to keep a faithful journal of all I see and hear
mules and lastly the poor white men, that he wanted
to abolish the slaveholders, exterminate the slaves so as to give an opportunity
Lieut. Pugh was here this morning, it was after we had gone into school and I did not see him, brought a fine turkey which he asked Mother to have cooked for them, they took it from Mr. Stamper, an old countryman back here, they met his this morning going in to the river with bale of cotton, some eggs and this turkey to trade with the Yankees of course, took the turkey themselves and I suppose turned him back with the rest.
This evening a man came over here from the Lieut. for a pair of scissors to cut hair, and soon afterwards another came to know if rather had any hand cuffs, that they had two Yankee prisoners. I am afraid Lieut. Pugh is not very trust worthy, I mean for a commander, he appears too rash, this taking of the prisoners may very likely bring the Yankees out here, unless they suppose our men in much stronger force than they really are. Never mind
I have been playing chess and writing so long this evening that I
shall not have much time to finish the cuffs Mother left for me to do, I
have not read any french this week, have been sewing, and Mother has been reading “No Name” to us, this is a book Miss Maggie Calderwood sent me the other day when I returned “Say and Seal.” I had hardly time to read it, but could not resist the temptation as it is by Wilkie Collins. I am as much interested in it as I was in the “Woman in White.” The weather brilliant and warm, the hills around are beautiful, I can find no words to
express the enchanting picture like
I have allowed two days to pass without writing the news, the Yankees are gone, and I have been so busy that I have not been able before to chronicle this great event. We heard the news Tuesday evening and on Wednesday morning Father and Mother went to town, the Yankees had indeed
But let us leave this sad and sickening topic for one very dear and happy to me. Wednesday evening Eldridge came back from Homer and brought me two letters, one from Willie and one from Mrs. Morancy. Willie's letter was very delightful to me, is so affectionate, he says he arrived in Homer
Mrs. Morancy's letter was affectionate as ever, she tells me that Willie's staying with them, says Mrs. Barr would take no excuse, she writes of the happiness of Mr. Bowmar Barr and his wife in their baby boy, I feel with them in this deepest, purest joy, it seems strange to think that Mr. Barr is no older than Willie.
Mrs. Mays spent the day with us yesterday, came for me to sew her hat. I was showing her about how to sew one for her little bay and had so many interruptions that I only finished the crown of her hat, have not worked any on it today, but shall try and finish it tomorrow. It has been disagreeably chilly today, fires were comfortable even at noon, Father and I took a ride this evening, saw such a beautiful haw tree in full bloom and gathered a quantity of the fragrant white wreaths, some of them are shedding their perfume through my room, combined with that of a rose that Mary sent me the other day, my little geranium is living and growing, my Valeria, it means so much to me as I look on its two delicate little leaves I am scarce refrain from caressing them, am only with held by the thought that my caress might hurt it. But my writing is becoming almost illegible, my eyes are
I did not know so many days had past since I opened my journal book,
I have been intending to write every day but have not had time. Monday
I received a long letter from Willie by Maj. Waddill and sat down to answer it immediately after dinner, it gave me great pleasure, described his habits of spending his time, was going that evening to Mrs. Bennett's to tea and from there to Church. I was surprised by a letter from Miss Mattie Newcombe it was full of expressions of affection for me, of truly kind feeling for Willie, I have just been answering it. Shall I say what lies on my mind, yes surely here; I don't like her extravagant sentimentalities to me when she has once or twice seemed wanting in common attention to my feelings and seems often constrained in my presence. I have been disappointed deeply in her and I cannot sincerely respond to extravagant expressions, yet I do feel truly grateful for hers and her Mother's kindness to my dear Brother, and I know Mrs. Bennett would not leave anything undone for his comfort if he needed it, so how could I write otherwise than affectionately to her, and how could I do otherwise than say that I wished very much she would come and see us. I do like her very well and I should like to see her, and after their warm welcome to Willie I should be unkind and ungrateful not to extend the same to her, but it troubles me that I have written to her as “My dear friend” than which I could apply no better save to my dear Valeria. But let me take up events again. Margaret Craig came to school Monday, I find her well behaved and intelligent as I expected, and better informed than I hoped.
Mr. Barr was here yesterday evening, brought a little note from his sister, asked me to go up with him tomorrow. I should like to go but don't feel that I ought. Finished Mrs. May's hat Saturday after a hard
Miss Mary, Lory and I had a delightful walk yesterday evening for flowers, we gathered our hands full of Haw, Black haw and honeysuckle, and they were so beautiful. We have three vases full in the parlour, and I have two boquets in my room, one of wild flowers and one, such a sweet one, of roses, violets, and a lovely cluster of white haw, our beautiful and sweet roses are blooming finely now, I have gathered six or seven in the last three days, must go now to water my geranium.
I am a little troubled about my dear Father, he looks badly, has a dreadful cold in his head. I hope his spirits will rise after this great victory at Mansfield, it is a second Manassas oh! how thankful I am, it was so unhoped for, we did not dare to hope even to check the Yankees, and
I am often troubled about the course I ought to pursue towards the children in my daily intercourse with them. I have been thinking much about it today and I am afraid I have not been kind enough to them, I don't mean that I have ever failed in love to them, indeed it is this very love, this intense desire that they should grow up virtuous, happy and well bred which makes me so eager to help them, and I see so many things every day to reprove that I fear I have reproved them too much, perhaps I have been too rigid, and have not made allowances enough. I ought to make them when I am so full of imperfections myself. I will try to be more loving in manner as well as in heart. I will try not to use authority but persuasion and to pass over slight faults however irritating they may be to me. Oh, I do so want to make them happy and yet I often seem to produce a contrary effect. What can I do? I can trust in my God, I can try always to keep my peace with Him, if I could do this I should never go wrong.
This has been a delightful day and how sweet is its close, the last rays
All the morning was not thus passes though, I heard some sad news, the death of Mrs. Dortche's brother, Capt. Martin, in the last battle, and several others that I knew by name but not personally. I had no friend to be killed it is true, but my heart bleeds for those who have been so bereaved by the many, many killed in that bloody fray which has preserved to us our peaceful homes. Captain Martin died nobly, the colour bearer had been three times shot, as the third one fell he stood near him and raised the flag in his hand, he had not made more than three steps before he fell, two balls had penetrated his stomach and one his shoulder, he lived for
has died.”
We hear many rumours but know nothing certainly about the position of the enemy, the time before is anything but a time of rest, the war cry resounds on all sides, its distant notes come from Virginia, from Kentucky and from the shores of the Atlantic, while nearer home its thunders appall us. What has this year in store for us. Oh that it may bring peace, how calm, how soft this evening hours, the distant cooing of the dove, the chirping of the little chickens under my window, the bright rays which shed a soft dying light over all, how can believe that this evening so many are losing in mortal strife, or groaning and tossing on the wounded soldier's pallet.
My room is perfumed by a glass full of roses and pinks on my desk.
Our friends in Monroe gave us so many roses when we came away, they did not know what a precious gift it was. I filled a large bowl with them and I never saw a more beautiful boquet, or rather pyramid of flowers, we hung over them in
Eldridge returned from Homer last night, brought a letter from Willie
Miss Mat seemed not to have the slightest idea of any tinge of coldness in my letter to her, I am glad she had not, hers is as warm as the last, says she and her sister hope to come down soon. I was very much disappointed by not getting letter or even a message from Mrs. Morancy, I expect she is going to write by Willie.
This long day is almost ended, I have been so weak and sick all day
that I shall welcome the shades of evening, it is Eva's birthday, and in
honour of her we have holiday. This morning immediately after breakfast
we all took a little walk to gather flowers, got a quantity of the beautiful
graceful blossoms of the “Old man's beard” tree and in coming home stopped at Dr. Young's and gathered our hands full of the honeysuckle that grows over the piazza. We have the parlour full of flowers, two small very weary still.
Mr. Barr came here on business about the iron that he is getting from the burned railroad bridge, stayed to dinner, is coming back to spend the night with us. I was very much indisposed to see anybody, but roused myself a little, feel better this evening, hope this dreadful lassitude will be over tomorrow. I have been expecting and hoping for Willie all the week. I wish so much he would come tonight, I expect him very confidently, there is no reason to prevent his coming they are doing nothing at Homer.
Mother went up to Mrs. Brinton's Wednesday for her spinning wheels, did not return until yesterday, to dinner, we missed her very much indeed. She took Loring with her, they brought me a beautiful white Texas pink (wild
The good news from the army still comes in, we heard of a gallant exploit
I have just come from witnessing the children's little party, they had a table set under the trees down at the foot of the gently sloping grove, and there the four sat, Eva, Loring, George and John, all as happy and contented as possible. Miss Mary and I sat and looked on, Eva is fourteen today, I often look at her and think how different she is from me at that age, she is a perfect child, with all the naieveté of ten years old, she has no idea of self control.
Lately in my moments of bodily weakness the sad thought comes over me that I am losing my youth, it is more a hypochondriacal fancy than anything else I expect. I have never had any beauty, I have always known and sadly known that I was ugly, but I have lost my color, my eyes are often surrounded by a purple band of coloring, my hair used to be the only beautiful thing about me, and now it has fallen out till it is not more than half as thick as formerly. I can't walk fast or walk at all without being exhausted by it and these frequent seasons of unconquerable lassitude incline me to fretfulness. I fancy that my voice is getting shrill, it is not so strong as it used to me, I know. Oh what a terrible picture, it is only to relieve myself that I draw it, it may provoke a smile in some better day to read over these
The rain, the longed for rain has come at last, and how softly it falls upon the thirsty earth, how I wish it were day that I could watch it, it is delightful thus though, and I will not be so ungrateful as to wish for anything more, the smell of the rain comes up from the earth speaking its gratitude. All the evening the clouds have been gathering and since supper the rain has commenced, gentle at first but growing faster and faster, it sounds like one of these delightful slow and general rains, I hope it will last all night. I have such a beautiful bowl of flowers again, Father went to Monroe this morning and Mary sent me a
I have felt miserably again today, but hope I shall be better tomorrow, this rain is so delightful. There was a young lady here this evening who
Willie has not come yet, I have been hoping and looking for him all day.
I have just finished my late dinner after having been asleep all the morning. Sunday evening Mother, Miss Mary and I went to see Mrs. Hawkins, a poor woman whose only child is very ill, we found the poor little girl at the point of death as we thought, yesterday evening Mother and I went down again, the child was no better and the poor Mother was quite worn out with watching and care. She had no one to sit up that night, and I resolved to stay. Mrs. Lidwell afterwards came over and we persuaded Mother to go to bed, exhaustion conquered her and she slept soundly all night while Mrs. Lidwell and I kept watch. The poor little girl has been sick in bed four weeks, and for a week past has taken scarcely any nourishment, she lay quietly almost all night. I felt so sorry for her, she must be a beautiful child in health, her eyes are large and black, and she has silky golden hair, even attenuated as they are her features are beautiful. She is only six years old, has been afflicted since her infancy with a partial deafness and dumbness caused from scarlet fever, her head is now drawn back
The morning was fresh and beautiful, the sun was just rising and his earliest rays fell on a scene of exquisite freshness and beauty, gilding the shining green leaves of the oaks and the dusky tops of the pines above, while the wheat field and the road lay in dewy shadow. As I walked slowly homeward I thought of how many such mornings I have risen and looked out on all this beauty, many a time with a glad worshipping heart, but ah too many times with a dimming care and a heart full of my own little daily troubles, not thinking of how many wake every morning to bitter or despairing sorrow. I am afraid I have been too selfish and have confined my cares my hopes too much to the circle of home, I might have done much more, at least I might have thought much more and might have prayed and trusted more than I have done.
Father went to Millhaven yesterday morning, we do not expect him back until tonight, perhaps he may not come then. Willie has not come yet, Mr. Barr is going to send a servant to Homer Thursday and I shall write to Willie by him. Mr. Barr spent last night here and breakfasted with us this morning. Loring and Eve were a little unwell yesterday and the night before,
Night—I returned from Mrs. Hawkins' late this evening, her little girl was still breathing. Oh how sorrowful to see her lie thus, her breath coming gaspingly, and her poor weary eyes seeming dimmed by the shadow of death. I did not think she would have stayed so long, soon she will be one of Heaven's angels. Our Father knows when to call his children home. When I look at this dying little child how all my cares, my sorrows and my restless yearning fall away from me, what matter is it what troubles we pass through if we only bear them so that we shall be taken to God at last.
I have not had time to write any for the last week and am now filching a few minutes from my sleeping time. Last Thursday evening we were delighted by the arrival of Willie and Miss Mat Newcombe and her sister. I was so glad to see Willie, he looks perfectly well and his visit has given me great pleasure. The young ladies too, I like them so much better than when they came down, they are both very pleasant and amiable girls. I think Mattie has a very sweet disposition, thus do my feelings change with acquaintance, I ought never to form a hasty judgement. We have been to ride every evening since they came. Sunday we went to town to Church, Miss Mary, Shep & Willie went to the Catholic and Mattie and I to the protestant Church. We heard a very feeling sermon from Mr. McGuire, and one which affected me
Mattie and Shep spent Monday and Tuesday in town, we have all been working hard today getting me ready for my visit. I had two dresses to make, they are beautiful patterns but are from Yankee land and I shall not on that account take pleasure in wearing them, should not have taken them but that Father had bought them and wished me to wear them, and I thought I could not disregard a positive duty for one which is perhaps doubtful.
Mr. Gordon brought the things from Vicksburg, some coffee, tea, cloth and actually some fruit. I am ashamed to write it, I could not bear to eat those things. The night after they came I went to sit up at Mrs. Hawkins' and at Father's urgent request took an orange with me, which I shared at midnight with the other woman who was watching with me then; at supper the next night I was afraid to wound Father's feelings by refusing the piece of pineapple he offered me, but it did me no good. Mrs. Hawkins' little child died Sunday, I have not been able to go to see her since, have not had a moment to spare. We had a little rain Monday.
I can't sit up any longer, it is already late, my next date will be in Homer; I feel like I was going far off, can't bear to think of taking leave of them all for two whole weeks. Tonight when I was thinking about it the thought came over me, suppose I was called to the last bitter parting, suppose God should call me to Him. Oh the bitterness of that hour, but “Thanks be to God who giveth us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ.”
It has been almost a month since I last wrote here and in that time I have been and returned from Homer. I cannot pretend to give anything like a daily record of my visit, it seems to me like I had written it all, and I would have done so had not every hour been filled up with visiting, receiving visits or conversation, except the many hours when an overwhelming weariness of body made one indisposed even for pleasure.
We left for Homer Thursday evening as we anticipated, went only a few miles and spent the night with a friend and relative of Mattie Newcomb's, Mrs. Lawler, we did not leave there until eleven o'clock the next morning, journeyed on slowly until we came to a fine shady place near an excellent spring, we were hungry and so chose this place for eating our basket dinner. I felt very weak and sick but a little lunch refreshed so very much, we took out our late Yankee papers, read some and talked more, then slept a little and by that time Antony was ready to “hitch up” the mules again. Our evening journey over hill and dale was very pleasant, the day was not too warm, the sun shone brightly, the road was well shaded and we had a company of four young people bound on pleasant journey, what more could we need. Ah youth, what a priceless blessing it is, would that I might be always young! The country through which we travelled was very much like our own immediate neighbour, poor and hilly but few fields and these few generally left uncultivated by the removal of their owners, the houses far between and badly built. Towards sunset we came into a prettier and better country, saw one or two very pretty little houses, came up to Col. Gilson's, one of the few stopping places on the road, it was early, but it was seven miles to the next
This is one of the poorest, meanest little places I ever saw, there is a so called “Hotel” there, but we had heard such accounts of it that we were by no means anxious to stay. As we drove up the long hill on which Vienna is situated we saw a man leaning on a large bay horse which stood at the side of the road without either saddle or bridle, as we came up he turned a bold face to us and stared right into the carriage, after we passed he turned again and continued his impertinent gaze until we were out of sight, then mounted his horse side wise, and passing us looked again, whistling all the time. We drove up to the only nice looking house in Homer, situated a little back in a garden, the residence of a Dr. Stuart. Willie went in to ask if we could stay all night, a young woman came down the path, evidently expecting an acquaintance. She was dressed in white with flowing sleeves and had on a black silk apron, her arms looked so cold and unfeeling when she said we could not stay, it was now nearly dark, as we turned from the gate we met the same impudent young man, who again gazed at us. In perfect disgust with Homer we drove rapidly through the one little street, by the time we reached the bottom of the hill the moon's pale light shone down on us. We had then four miles to go, we did not mind it much as it was a bright moon light, and went on talking and singing until we saw the friendly lights from Mr. handed on a coarse plate; however we were very thankful for the shelter, they were very much crowded but we slept very soundly three in a bed.
The next day we left as soon after breakfast as possible, we had a delightful days ride through a beautiful hill country, sometimes we would come to the summit of a lofty hill, the road wound red and rough through the green woods an its side, in the valley waved small fields of wheat and rye, glistening green in the sunlight or lying darker in shade of the opposite hill, a little stream ran across the road and beyond the hill rose in terraces, below a wood of oak and hickory with their bright gleaming foliage,
The road was very rough and much washed into
I was so tired I had to stop just there, and do not now feel like taking up the record again, but must just say how delightful it is to be at home. We only arrived yesterday evening, I have been putting to rights today and now at the twilight hour everything in so pleasant in my room, everything in the garden has grown beautifully, my little flower garden is so sweet, and my dear little geranium so luxuriant. I wrote to Valeria while in Homer, it was a painful pleasure, Mr. Gordon kindly sent the letter to Mr. Cassidy who had promised to forward it.
Sunday evening I went up to Mrs. Barr's, was so glad to see them and met such a warm welcome. I do love Mrs. Barr and Mrs. Morancy, I never knew a lovelier character than Mrs. Barr's. I remained at Mrs. Bennett's a week, while there received a good many calls from different young ladies, took several very pleasant rides. One evening Mr. Kimball called to accompany me, I had a delightful ride, a slight shower had just washed the dust from the trees and we went along a very pretty road, we mutually exerted ourselves to please, and discoursed at large on the beauties of nature, he described several beautiful scenes in the White mountains, and we found some places which we knew in common. I have rarely met a pleasanter companion, but he lacks that indefinable, that subtle essence of manhood without which refinement, culture and taste all leave a visible lack in a man. The strength, the decision and fearless uprightness of a true man, what can equal it?
We had a little surprise party at Mrs. Bennett's while I was there, about fourteen ladies and more gentlemen were present, the evening passed quickly and delightfully and three o'clock came before departure was thought of, the stars were beginning to fade when I went to rest.
The next day I went to Mrs. Barr's, spent the day in company with Major Street, he was probably fatigued from the party, at any rate he was very dull. I was enjoying one of my best days, was neither tired nor sleepy. That week at Mrs. Barr's was one of great enjoyment to me, it is delightful
to be with those who never offend the taste by any lack of refinement, towards whom the heart goes out in perfect trust and love, such are Mrs. Barr and
While at Mrs. Barr's we borrowed “Shirley” from Mattie Newcombe, I read it aloud, some parts of it spoke so to my heart that I seemed to breathe out myself in reading them. The book has some great imperfections but I like it very much for all that. Mrs. Bowmar Barr left with her husband for Monroe the day after I went there, she is now here, has been staying with Mother ever since she came down, her baby in a very pretty and good little fellow.
I was much more pleased with Julia while at Homer than ever before, she is not a friend in that high sense in which the word should only be used, but her many good qualities make me like her in spite of the prejudices which were engendered by her surface faults. The day after I expected Father and Miss Mary I received a note from her saying that as Father was coming from Millhaven with one of the mules he was going to drive to Shreveport, the mule kicked up and struck Father with his hoof on one side of the nose, breaking the bone and cutting a great gash, she wrote that Father was getting much better and would be up soon, that his principal trouble was about my disappointment and a fear of my being anxious about him. I was indeed quite anxious but the next day, Friday, as we were sitting reading
she tells me so? But let me leave the speculations for more apparent facts.
The week of Miss Mary's stay was divided between Mrs. Barr's and Mrs. Bennett's, we spent one day with Mrs. Scarborough, I had been twice to see them before, was very glad to meet them again. Tabitha is as kind as ever but her face has taken a still more pensive cast and her girlish beauty is much impaired. I am afraid her married life is not happy, her husband is an inferior man in every respect, and is besides, a gambler. I do not see how she can either love or respect him. On Saturday evening we were delighted by seeing Father again, he and Mr. Gordon spent the night at Mrs. Bennett's. Father was very much fatigued, his nose was much improved but one his eyes was badly inflamed. The next morning we all went to Church, the sermon was not good, and it was excessively warm. Father and Mr. Gordon dined at Mrs.
Monday morning we left as soon as we could on our way home. It was a cloudy morning and when we had gotten about three miles we had quite a little shower, about an hour afterwards the rain commenced again and just poured down, it drove steadily against us, soon the waves, of course our progress was extremely slow, I did not get wet much, Miss Mary and I were safe except our dresses which got a little wet and very much tumbled. Father was quite dry too, but Mr. Gordon and Jerry were the sufferers, they sat in front and although Mr. Gordon had a blanket over his knees he got quite wet. Before twelve o'clock the rain ceased and when we found a good place we stopped to eat dinner, in an hour or two we started again and plodded slowly on, it was yet more than an hour before sunset when we came to Mr. Green's, the next stopping place was eight miles on, but Miss Mary and I had such a distaste to stopping at Mr. Green's again that we went on. About a half mile on we met Maj. Waddill, he was going up to Homer to meet his wife, but when we told him that she was not there he said he would not go on but would probably come back to Mr. Gibson's after a short business interview with Mr. Green, so we went on slowly. It was almost sunset when we reached Vienna, Mr. Gordon took the reins and
young ladies, so of course we had to drive on. Maj. Waddill was accepted, we left him standing in the dark with “I regret exceedingly, ladies” on his lips. The next mile was over the muddy, rough road in the dark, Jerry got out and walked ahead, to find the bad places. At length we came to the next inhabited place, the lights burned faintly, our suspense was dreadful while Father held a parley which we could not hear. What was our relief when we heard the welcome words, “Gordon drive up here,” so up we drove guided by the voice, the people were all gone to bed, the gentleman of the house came out with a lantern by which light we descended and walked up the short path to the house. I never was so grateful for a night's shelter in my life, I was tired to death and when the young lady showed us into a little room with white curtains to the one window, and a white counterpane on the plump bed, I could not help giving vent to my gratitude. There was a nice little white basin and pitcher and linen towels, the room was only about twelve feet square but everything was so nice that Miss Mary and I were enchanted. We had soon stretched our weary limbs and were fast asleep. The next morning we had a very good plain
fortunately they found a man in Shreveport who had a horse he wanted to send to Monroe, so Father put him in beside the other mules. At Mr. Mayfield's (where we stopped all night) Jerry lost his knife, which is a negroe's greatest treasure, he was very such distressed about it. After we started we found that he had had no breakfast and Father took out our lunch basket to give him some ham and bread, we had had a large piece of cake in it, but when I lifted the towel which should have contained it there was none there. At first I suspected Father and Mr. Gordon of having taken it for supper, but they looked so innocently surprised that we had to suppose some negro had pilfered it, everything else in the basket was all right, as Jerry munched his bread and meat he muttered, “bad luck, Mule lost, knife lost, cake gone, pipe lost and like to turn over, don't like to travel.” We all laughed heartily at his enumeration and concluded that poor Jerry was, next to Mr. Gordon, the greatest sufferer by the trip. Father, it is true, had broken his nose, but flesh will heal. We arrived at home by three o'clock, were so glad to get here again, the house looked so large and the parlour had such an elegant air to our eyes, while I felt quite lost in the hall. We found Mr. and Mrs. Barr still here, Mr. Beck and Miss Mary had been to pay Mrs. Barr a visit, just left last week, I was
I have been intending to write here all the week but have not had time. Mother was taken with the
Mr. Bowmar Barr and his wife and baby left here Sunday, being afraid of the
We were surprised by a visit from Capt. Oliver Tuesday, he was on his
way to Trenton, “the Post” is at last moving down. Capt. Oliver stayed
to dinner, said that Willie would probably be on that night, so we expected
him, but went to bed disappointed. I was gladdened the next morning however
by hearing from Rose that Willie had come about ten o'clock, I had
slept so soundly that his coming was unheard. He brought many loves from
everybody, and a very affectionate note from Mrs. Morancy to me. Mother
has been very much troubled for fear Willie might have fallen in love with
Shep Bennett; I think she has no cause for uneasiness, at one time while
in Homer I feared the same, but I hope the fancy was fleeting, she is too
old for him, and I don't think she would make him a good wife, perhaps I
hope too much for him, it seems to me it would almost break my heart for
him to marry her; he has not been very well lately and has become thinner,
probably owing to the warm weather. Mr. Newcomb, Mrs. Bennett's oldest
son, called yesterday evening, we kept him with us all night, and he and
Willie left together after breakfast this morning. Father is not very well
today, had an attack of dizziness and could eat but little breakfast, but
insisted on going in to Monroe. We don't expect him back till after dinner.
It is very warm today, we have not had a shower for two whole days.
I happened this morning to glance at a portion of my journal written soon after the fall of New Orleans; how dark the times were then! and oh how trebly dark there were this winter, but now light has at last dawned and in such a bright promise of a sunlight day, at last the tremulous hope
know little with certainty, our confidence in Lee has never once faltered, may he prove again victorious!
We have heard that a resolution has passed the lower house in the Yankee Congress proposing to open negotiations for peace, this is too good to believe. The four years of Lincoln's administration are drawing to a close, we have looked forward to this as affording prospects for peace, and now the state of affairs in the north seem to justify the words of President Davis' last message in which he expresses an opinion that the war will end during the year. Long, of Ohio, has made a speech in the Federal Congress in which he advocates in the boldest and strongest manner that the Confederate States shall be recognized and propositions made for peace. He frankly declares the right of secession, condemns coercion as wrong in principle and effect, and pronounces Lincoln alike a fool and a knave, all this in the forcible, moderate manner which speaks conviction not passion to be the motive of his words, if there were many such man in the Federal Congress our hopes would be assured. From these great national interests which are so absorbing, I descend to the small but to us important events of our own lives.
Mother left her room for the first time yesterday morning, she is not
cunning sitting up
on the butter bucket. Willie now comes home to his meals and to stay at
night, he is having the hands out wood for coals, down at ostensibly to take down the
cotton which belongs to Maynard, a frenchman who bought it from the government and paid in government
We were delightfully surprised last Friday by Dr. McDonough's arrival, he came while we were at dinner, we were very glad indeed to see him, he and Father went in to Monroe Saturday, the Doctor did not come out till late in the evening. He remained with us yesterday, left this morning immediately after breakfast. I finished plaiting Jenny Morancy's hat Saturday, sent it up today by Berry, one of the negroes who is going up with a wagon train. I am not at all satisfied with the plait, it in not as nice as I have done, but I have been so long out of practice in braiding that it is difficult for me to do it. I am going to commence making a pair of corsets for dear Mrs. Barr this evening, and then I have a hat to sew for Willie and one for Louis Stevens and one for Sandy, after this I hope to be over my press of work for a time.
Eva has had the chills again, looks very badly, her system is in a low
state, she imagines she has the
It is very warm, we begin to need a shower already though it is not more than four days since we had one, we have been very much blessed in showers for the past month; the vegetables are doing well, we had Okra soup today for the first time this summer. One of our heliotropes is
Father has been having the piazza floored in front of the house, it is a great luxury to have it to sit on in the morning and evening, though it is too sunny at this hour, or at any time between seven and six o'clock, it gives quite a different character to the front of the house.
We hear today of a new victory gained by Lee over Grant, I hope it may be true and I believe it is, we hardly recognize the possibility of Lee's being defeated. I think tremblingly of John and Angus, they must have been in these late battles if Indeed they had not fallen before; Oh that I could hear from them.
I received two letters by Mr. Newcomb yesterday evening, one very
affectionate and welcome from Mrs. Morancy, she tells me that she has at
last in earnest commenced to wean Jennie, and that they are both much better for it. I am glad indeed that this is so; Mrs. Morancy also writes that
Julia and Miss Creath expect to come down next week. I wish it might be
Mrs. Barr and Mrs. Morancy, though I like Julia much better than I used,
and shall like a visit from her. My acquaintance with Miss Creath is very
slight, and has not left a favourable impression upon me. My other letter
was from Mattie Newcomb, written in high flown style of sentiment with
hardly a single rational sentence in it, this is grievous to me, I must
do my best to preserve my own sincerity untainted. Oh my own dear friend,
Mr. Gordon spent last night with us, on his way from Shreveport, where he had been to get his mule, he succeeded in getting it. Was called upon by the conscript officers, told them he had always been willing to go into the army, and would go anywhere if they would not conscript him, they promised to write to him when they wanted him. He has a natural deformity, one of his hands is imperfect, and this has prevented him from being in the army.
It has been nearly two weeks since I have written here, two very busy weeks they have been to me. Mrs. Bowmar Barr has been with us since Saturday, she came out to spend the night and next day, but we persuaded her to stay until her husband came, she expected him Tuesday but he did not arrive here till this morning. They expected to leave this evening but it is raining now and probably they will not leave; this is such a refreshing shower, such a grateful smell comes up from the thirsty earth, for though we have a shower almost every day the sun is so hot that it soon dries the
Mr. Gordon came out today to have his horse shod, he expects to go to Georgia in two weeks. Father thinks something of going with him, we would miss him dreadfully but I am anxious for him to go, I know the trip would improve his health and spirits, and then if he went I should be certain of hearing from Valeria once more.
Mother expects to leave for her excursion into the country on Wednesday; Eva had another chill a few days ago, but kept off the next by taking quinine. Loring's health is still bad and his chills return often, he and Willie went up the river this morning, Willie was going up on a flat boat for government corn, and Lory begged to go with him, and as Mother thought it might do him good she consented, they expect to be gone about a week. I have been suffering much for the past week from boils, today the second one has attained
I finished Mrs. Barr's corsets the first part of the week, although I took a great deal of pains with them I yet feel so sensibly how unworthy they are her wearing that I am timid about sending them. I finished Lewy
The rain still continues, a delightful summer rain, it cools the air
After writing the above last Saturday I found my pain increasing so much that in an hour or two afterwards I was obliged to go to bed. I was reading the “Last days of Pompeii,” commenced it soon after I came home, and have not yet finished it, and thought this a good opportunity to read some. While I lay there groaning and reading by turns, I heard a great hubbub, and up drove Mrs. Stone, Miss Kate and Jimmy. I was very glad to see them, we were surprised but not very greatly so, as Mr. Barr had told us that they were in Homer and expected to come down the next week. Mrs. Stone looks older, as is natural she should after so much trouble, but she is as loquacious as ever, talks constantly and very cheerfully, with a compliment in almost every sentence, Miss Kate seems just as if she had only gone away yesterday. Jimmy is quite changed, has grown a great deal and is very manly. I like him very much, he has come in to join the army.
Sunday I rose for breakfast but was obliged to lie on the couch afterwards, and finally to go to bed in much pain, my boil burst about twelve o'clock, which much relieved me. Mr. Scott the President of the western division of this railroad, came in on the stage just before breakfast, spent the day with us, he is a quiet, pleasant gentleman, a little older than Father; he came in on railroad business. Mr. Gordon left soon after breakfast.
Monday morning we all went into town, Mrs. Stone, Miss Kate and Jimmy
Mother and Eva left yesterday morning, we miss them so much, last night we were very lonesome indeed. Willie and Loring are still absent, and this makes us feel it more, but I am so very busy all day looking after the children and Susannah; our new maid; that I don't have time to be lonely until evening.
Mother took Rose with her, and the woman that we have in her stead is quite ignorant of her new duties, and requires a great deal of looking after, but she is apparently willing to learn, and does very well.
Monday night Father brought me a letter from Lois and Grandma, it was dated last April, is the first line we have received from Georgia since
The weather is still very warm, this morning it was quite breezy and pleasant, we had a heavy rain Monday night.—
I have not had a spare minute to write any in my journal until now, and have now only a little time. We were delighted Saturday morning by the arrival of Willie and Loring, they had had a very saving work; it has
not been quite a week since Mother left, but it seems to me like months.
Since Emmeline is sick I have to wash and dress George and John every evening, the little fellows are gone out this evening to get a book Mrs. Leighton promised to lend me, I have hardly time to read it now; the children sometimes irritate me, but I always feel so sorry for having given way to any tempers, and cannot bear them out of my sight.
We were pleasantly surprised Sunday by the arrival of Julia Barr and Miss Shawlie Creath. Miss Shawlie left that afternoon but Julia remained with us. I was very glad to have her, we were so lonesome, and it seems so pleasant and homelike to have her with us. I was sorry to see her leave this evening, she went for a short visit over on the Bayou with Mrs. Dortch
Mother returned yesterday, we were almost wild with joy at seeing her again, but neither she nor Eva are improved as we had hoped to see them, Eva had two chills while she was gone. I am in hopes that coming home may cure her, as going away would not. Mother returned with a very bad nervous headache, probably arising from fatigue, it is not well today, but is better. I received a letter from Mrs. Barr which gratified me much, and which brought tears to my eyes, also a long and affectionate letter from Mrs. Morancy, and an equally long one from Mattie Newcomb full of sentimental expressions.
Juila Barr spent Monday night with me, went over to Mrs. Dortch's yesterday evening; we were agreeably surprised by Miss Kate Stone's return last night, she has not yet heard from her Mother, came out with Mrs. Templeton, (the lady whom she was visiting) who brought her daughters out for Dr. Temple to operate on their teeth. Kate is going back with them to meet Jimmy, who has now joined Harrison's command, and gone in to the river on a raid.
Willie returned home Monday morning, was of course very much tired, but was obliged to leave yesterday just after dinner to be gone a month, to haul corn down to Columbia. Oh, I would be so glad if he could get out of this quarter master's department, but there seems to be no prospect
George and Loring had such a narrow escape last Friday evening, they had driven down to Mrs. Lidwell's for some apples, leaving me at Mrs. Dortch's, and as they were starting back Nelly, (the mule) started off at a rapid pace, which frightened Lory, he checked her and then got out of the buggy to lead her along, but on reaching her head she became alarmed and galloped off, and George commenced to scream loudly. Loring held on to the bridle for some little distance but finally let go, and the mule dashed right on over all that rough road, and came round the corner. We heard Georgie's screams, and I at once thought of him and Loring, we all ran towards the fence and saw the mule galloping rapidly on with poor little Georgie alone in the buggy. Not knowing what was become of Lory I was dreadfully frightened, but was soon relieved, Alick Dortch caught the mule by jumping out in front of him. The worst effect of the affair was that in running rapidly, with Johnny Dortch in her arms, Miss Laura Barnes had tripped and fallen, spraining her arm badly; there was no one else hurt, except that the next day poor Lory was very much tired from running so fast, and from excitement, and was confined to his couch almost all day.
The weather has been very cool for several days, the mornings are absolutely unpleasantly chilly, but this evening I feel almost suffocating though it is only the stillness of the atmosphere that is oppressive, it is quite dry and we are needing rain very much, we had a promise of it today but it passed off with only a shadow of a sprinkle. I am quite engrossed with “doctoring” Mollie now, she has the “big head” I have found out, and
rancid, very
rancid, bacon, enough fat to make a pint and a half of grease, try it out
and then put in a bunch of wormwood as large as you can clasp one hand
around by holding it tightly, simmer over a slow fire until the wormwood
is completely exhausted of
Julia Barr says Mr. Ludeling brought up a great many things for himself and his immediate friends, and she says she heard that Captain Griffin told some friends that he had Mother's things and she should get then before he left. I cannot write any more now; am going dam to Mrs. Dortch's to see Julia, and then to Mrs. Temple's with Kate to call on Mrs. Templeton and daughters, and invite them here, and then Kate and I are going to Mrs. Scarborough's to sit up with her two little boys who are dreadfully ill with the
John has been quite sick, we were very anxious about his yesterday, he was taken Thursday night and early the next morning we sent for the doctor, he pronounced his attack bronchitis, he had a high fever yesterday, but today is better and is playing about though very taciturn and languid, he is very hoarse and has a bad cold but has improved so much since morning that I hope by tomorrow he will be quite well. George also has a bad cold. Both of Mrs. Scarborough's children died Wednesday night, the youngest one in the afternoon. Kate Stone and I were there when the oldest one died, oh it was dreadful to think of those poor parents with one little figure lying cold and shrouded and the other insensible, breathing his last, his dying was long and painful. The Father's grief was terrible, the Mother had left the bedside, unable to view her darling's suffering and when his Father in an agony of grief tore himself from his almost lifeless boy, we could hear their groans and sobs as they mounted together in the adjacent chamber. As I saw the fearful change come over the face it seemed to me I could live and see it on one of my own dear ones. Oh God, it is terrible, and then to see the lifeless body, to think where has the spirit gone, there it was certain this little suffering soul is now an angel in heaven, but we cannot be thus sure of those who have lived to manhood's years. My darling brothers, rather would I now see you on the bier than to think that in future years you may die without the grace of God and leave Earth in uncertainty of gaining Heaven. Mr. Scarborough and all his family left the next day carrying with them the corpses of the little ones for whose health they had come here so lately in strength and rejoicing. Mrs. Scarborough
Just now I came to my window to watch the rising of the storm, which the clouds
seemed to promise us, but now it has all passed by. I still hear the sound of
distant thunder, but am afraid we shall not have the much needed rain; for three
days it has been very warm and sultry, today the heat is
My worst fears for Willie's health were realized yesterday, my poor brother is
sick at Columbia, and wrote up for Father to send the ambulance and a mattress
for him, he has chills and fever. He wrote that he was quite sick, but the fact
that it was written by another person, for him, makes us very anxious, we cannot
expect him till tomorrow at the soonest, sent immediately yesterday evening.
Father would have gone but thought it better for Willie to have all the room.
George had a fever all day yesterday and last night, we were alarmed by an
eruption which appeared on his body, sent for Dr. White early this morning, who
said the fever was caused by a severe cold and the eruption was nettle rash, we
have only to be careful that the rash does not strike in. A negro child near
here broke out with it last week,
Mrs. Stone and Kate arrived yesterday morning, Mrs. Stone had been to her place
and to Millikens bend, was rejoiced to get out safe, found the old negroes she
left on her place faithful, and that they had taken care of her silver, she
brought out a few pieces, gave the rest to a yankeeized southern lady at the
bend. Mrs. Stone got a few goods, could not get either tea or coffee, says
greenbacks are rapidly depreciating. She brought out a quantity of new songs,
books and magazines, the fashions are perfect curiosities to us, so much
changed. Mrs. Stone also brought a large packet
Willie did not come Thursday, as we hoped, and we were quite anxious but Friday
morning early we heard the ambulance coming. I was sleeping up stairs with Miss
Kate Stone, and was not yet dressed though I had been up some time. I was soon down stairs, Willie was very weak, and looked badly indeed, he has fallen away
so much, his cheeks look hollow and his form very thin. He has not improved
very much since he came home, but is as well as one could expect, he was very
sick indeed with the bilious fever, has had no fever since he came home. Mrs.
Copely and her daughter George spent the day with us Wednesday, as Mrs. Stone and Kate were here we had quite a large party and spent a pleasant day. Mrs.
Stone left Thursday
It is all so quiet this morning that the bustle and company of the past weeks,
especially last night, seems like some gay dream. But I will commence at the
first day. Monday Mr. Beck and Miss Mary left, I was so sorry to see
Tuesday Miss Mary, Kate and I went into Monroe to spend the day with Mary
Stevens, I called on Mrs. Harrison at Dr. Calderwood's, found both her and Miss
Maggie at Home and spent a very pleasant hour. We found Mrs. Stevens quite well,
for her, and it was late before we left, having obtained a promise from May and
Mrs. Copley to come out and spend the night with us and meet Miss Chaffe, a
young lady at Dr. Temple's, who came down for some dentistrical work, and who is
a friend, and Miss Copley's. Mrs. C. described her to us as a beautiful
songstress, and as we had a great desire to hear her sing we determined to have
her down with us if she would come.
When at Miss Calderwood's I borrowed several books from her, one of which
“Family pride” she recommended very highly, so as we had nothing better to do we
thought it would interest us to read it aloud, accordingly after all our
domestic affairs were settled we seated ourselves to our sewing, and I was as
usual constituted reader. After we got into the interest of the story, which was
not long, we were not willing to stop, and pursued Margaret Desmond's mysterious adventures till dinner and immediately after until time for our afternoon
dispersion at nearly five in the afternoon, as may be supposed I was troubled
with a slight hoarseness from which I have not yet recovered, my throat feels
quite raw this morning, and I have been soothing it with loaf sugar.
While I was dusting the piano Mary and Mrs. Copley drove up, rested
faded
pumps. We laughed very much at her description of the gentleman's last and
apparently most striking characteristic. There was quite a circle of us on the
piazza when we saw an ambulance driving up, a lady holding the reins, on it's
near approach we recognized Lucy Seale, her Mother, and a young gentleman
clinging to the back of the vehicle whom they introduced as Capt. Gillespie, and
of whom we had frequently heard Kate speak as a cousin of Mrs. Templeton's of by
no means a staid disposition or demeanor, as we now experienced. We prevailed on
them to descend from their elevation and join our party, and there we sat in
formidable array of summer evenings toilets with only three coats interspersed,
when the solitary “pair of faded pumps” rode up and manfully facing our bright
artillery dismounted, and advanced up the steps, being introduced to us in a
body as “Lieut. Coleman ladies,” he gladly sank
This morning after breakfast Mrs. Templeton left, taking Kate with her to pay a visit at her house at Oak Ridge.
Willie is much improved the last two days, is much stronger, but still looks very badly. Father went to the flouring mill at Downsville this morning to have our little crop of twenty-five bushels of wheat ground, it is only sixteen miles and he will be back tomorrow. We have not yet had any decisive news from Atlanta, but hear some vague rumours about our position there which awaken much anxiety and disquiet in our minds.
Nothing has happened since I wrote last. Father returned from mill yesterday
afternoon, we also finished reading our book, after having read all day my eyes
were very tired, and I wanted to walk over to Mrs. Craig's but Mother thought
the walk too wet and proposed that I should go down to Mrs. Leighton's. I was
just walking up to the gate when Willie saw me, and claimed my promise to take a
buggy ride with him, the evening had been so wet I thought he had abandoned the
idea. I called at Mrs. Leighton's to return
We hear rumours of a raid the Yankees have made into Georgia from Hilton head, but nothing certain.
Willie rode into Trenton this evening in the buggy, is ordered into camp as soon
as he is able to go; the ride in tired him very much. I have been anxious for
him to quit the quartermaster's service, and now that he is about to leave I
find myself full of a kind of
Willie heard today that the Yankees in their raid from Hilton Head had gone as
far as Macon and had burned the Oconee railroad bridge, but that they had all
been surrounded and captured, probably by our own brave militia. Oh, how it
makes my heart throb with proud, thankful joy to think of it. The Oconee bridge
was built by Father, it was in a manner the commencement of his railroad career.
How anxious we are to hear news of Atlanta, the Yankees on their raid must have
passed right by Uncle David's, I wish we could hear from them. The mysterious
horseman who passed through our yard the other night was no more romantic
personage than a poor half blind soldier who brought a note from Dr. Temple to
his wife and probably mistook this for his house, he stayed at Dr. Temple's all
night, and went off the next morning to hunt conscripts!
How lightened my mind feels tonight of the heavy burden which has so long pressed upon. Oh, have I indeed made one stop towards that end which has long been to me the highest. Mr. Lawson, the episcopal minister from Bastrop is coming down to Monroe to preach on Sunday, and tonight I told Mother about how I had long desired to join the Church, she said I might see Mr. Lawson Sunday, unworthy as I am of this high privilege I feel it will give new life to every effort in duty and Oh how inexpressibly it will soothe my weary and often doubtful soul if I am thought fit for this sovereign mercy.
I have just come in from the room where they are warping our first piece of
cloth, it looks so pretty, and I could not help putting my fingers in to the
“leese” as they call it, crossed the threads correctly and was full of my
Susannah, has been lazy and only spun five,
but yesterday Miss Mary told her she must do six or finish her task after dark,
she brought in only five and a half. Miss Mary was faithful to her promise and
she brought in the other half cut, in a surprisingly short space of time.
I received a letter from my dear Aunt Mary yesterday, the first one in a year,
though she says she has written many, her letter was affectionate and
interesting, and was truly welcome. I do not now feel so utterly cut off from
Georgia as before, for this letter came by mail in the short time of one month,
she had only received two of my letters, but one was the long one that I wrote
first and which described our affairs most fully.
Miss Mary came at this point in my writing and called me away, to
accompany her in a rattling ride home with Mrs. Lidwell, we went in the
ambulance and had a delightful ride through the mud; it has been raining almost
continually since last Saturday, but now as I raise my eyes I behold with
rapture the golden lined clouds in the west which give cheering hope of a fair
day tomorrow, while they fill our souls with love and rapture in
hard woman, has
gone to get Mr. McQuiller from he bought Pompey to go up with him as proof; sad
to think that this should be thought necessary, but such are these degenerate
days when oaths are often lightly taken and still more lightly broken.
Tuesday morning Mrs. Dortch sent up an invitation for me to come down as she expected Miss Maggie Calderwood and Laura Barnes to come out; I accepted her invitation with pleasure, and spent a very pleasant day, though the rain prevented Miss Maggie and Miss Laura from coming. I think Miss Kane a very pleasant young lady. We have passed many of the hours of this rainy week with great pleasure and profit in reading “The Talisman” aloud, like almost all of Scott's novels it is admirable, the first few chapters rather dragged a little owing, I suppose, to the preoccupation of my mind, but after that we were all intensely interested.
The air which comes through my window has something of the bracing
I received a letter from Mrs. Morancy the other evening, she says Mrs. Barr will gladly take Miss Mary and Eva if she can get the room fixed; I hope they will be able to go, it will improve them both. I think in some things Miss Mary depends too much upon, she will when away be obliged to exert her own powers, but how we shall miss them, Willie too away, ours will indeed be a changed family.
I sit down this evening to chronicle the great event of our year, we have our
first piece of cloth in the loom, and while I write I hear Alice weaving. Mrs.
Lidwell came over yesterday and put it in but she made a mistake and had to put
it in over again today. I congratulate myself that the mysteries of weaving are
beginning to be elucidated in my mind. I now understand plain cloth, and really
think I could put in a piece myself. Yesterday I “handed up” the thread to Mrs.
Lidwell and tired my arm so that it pained me all the evening.
Willie returned from Mrs. Brantley's Sunday evening, did not get Pompey. Antony
made a mistake, the horse was very much like, but (in Willie's opinion at least)
not equal to that
We went into Monroe Sunday, but how disappointed we were when we found that Mr. Lawson had not come. We heard an earnest and fervent sermon from old Mr. McGuire, and I felt benefited by it, but I was so much disappointed about seeing Mr. Lawson. I have now to put off further the purpose of opening my heart to him on that nearest and highest subject, that which I feel is so imperatively my duty, and which I must perform before I can hope for enduring peace of mind.
We had the pleasure of welcoming a visit from Dr. McDonough the other evening, his came Saturday soon after dinner, was away yesterday and today, but we expect him back tonight, we are very glad indeed to see him again. The hospital has moved back here again in the same houses it occupied last winter; we are so sorry Dr. McDonough is not with it, but I don't believe he wants to come; Dr. Furness is the chief with Dr. Melton for an assistant, we shall probably have opportunities for perfecting our acquaintance with the former, have not seen him yet. Mr. Gordon is here this evening, will remain all night, I suppose, I am very much afraid he will not go to Georgia. Oh, if he only would, how rejoiced I would be!
We had a lame soldier here Sunday and yesterday. Father was at the
quartermaster's office in Trenton the other day and found him there trying to
get transportation. Father brought him out this far, and this morning
Peace,” has been in the army three years, wounded twice, the last time
was at Chicka mauga, where he was shot in the ankle, and now he has to walk on
crutches, he appears to be a very good, honest young man; has not heard from his
family since Vicksburg fell, and says he supposes his Mother and Father think he
is dead. What a glad surprise his return will be.
The weather is delightful now, we appreciate it so much after the rain, my
geranium is growing so beautifully and the heliotropes are luxuriant, the little
garden looks so beautiful in the morning when the heavy dew actually drips from
the plants.
I have been quite sick ever since I wrote last, was very languid Wednesday, and lay on the couch all the morning, but thought it was nothing more than the debility which so often prostrates me, but in the evening I felt severe pain in my head and limbs, which prevented my sleeping during the night. Thursday morning Mother went up to consult the Dr. and as he thought my symptoms were typhoid in their character he came down immediately, but it proved nothing serious. I, of course, had to take the usual Blue mass and calomel and quinine, I had but very little fever, suffered principally from pains in my limbs and great prostration of strength, with an indifference to everything which seems astonishing in my nervous temperament. Yesterday was the first day I dressed, though I went to ride Wednesday evening. I still feel quite weak and look extremely pale and more than usually ugly.
The weather is excessively warm, the afternoons and early part of the night are scarcely tolerable, but in the morning we have quite a pleasant breeze, the sun is burning.
There is much sickness through the country, as usual we have our share. Loring
has had another slight attack of the chills, and Eva is taking quinine today to
keep hers off; she has had three. Mr. Barr and Julia spent last night with us,
left this morning for Homer. Mr. Barr came down last week, Mrs. Morancy has been
very sick indeed, and now has dreadful sore eyes, how thankful I am she was
spared to her family and friends, her disease was very dangerous, threatened
comparatively as in New
Orleans in 1853. Dr. Furness himself looks very badly, took tea with us Tuesday
night before I was sick, has been over since with his colleague Dr. Melton. Miss
Mary thought the latter quite agreeable, I am quite curious to see him.
Have really nothing particular to write this morning, but have just finished writing to Aunt Mary and felt in a humour to keep on. Father and Mother are gone to Monroe today, we are quite alone. Miss Mary and Eva are very busy, the one sewing, the other plaiting a palmetto hat. They are again getting ready to go to Homer. Mrs. Barr sent us word in a letter to Julia that she would try and get the room “fixed,” and hoped to have it done in a week or two.
I have quite recovered from my illness, took a pleasant ride in the
Our neighbourhood is full of soldiers, several divisions came up from Alexandria
the other day, and are still near Monroe, the sick are sent out to these
hospitals, except Walker's division, whose sick have gone up the river
somewhere; Walker is transferred to the command of some department in Texas. The
two hospitals are very much crowded, but I believe there are only three
dangerously ill, poor fellows, they are in want of many things, I wish we could
supply them. The accommodations and provisions they have are both insufficient,
one of those who has been here from the first was over last night to get some
bread we had had baked for him, he said there was not room for all the men in
the house, but some were lying out under the trees just on their blankets; it
distresses us to think we can do nothing for them. Yesterday morning when they
first came out, Mrs. Dortch
The weather has not been so oppressively warm for the last two or three days,
the sky was a little cloudy last night. I hope we shall have rain soon, we are
beginning to need it, so many wagons passing on the road have made it quite
dusty. Willie and I took a long horseback ride Monday evening, went to Mrs.
Bullock's on the Arkansas road to carry a hat Miss Mary and I made some time ago
for a little orphan boy she has. I have seldom seen a more desolate looking
country, for a mile the road lay through continuous woods, only here and there
some deserted and ruined cabin. After we came out on the public road it was
perhaps more dreary, for the houses were of the poorest sort, far between, often
deserted and always ruinous, with people as miserable looking and as scarce as
their cabins. We were quite tired when we reached our destination, rode up a
washed and “gullied” approach to a most miserable looking habitation, a little
have cultivated enclosure on one side, a lot on the other in which stood a poor
bay horse, while outside under a tree languished a miserable claybank, with his
back all bloody, a decrepit paling enclosed a little yard before the door where
a few stunted altheas grew out of the hard ground. The house was composed of two
log “pens” with a passage between and a “gallery” in front, on a little stool in
this “gallery” Mrs. Bullock sat carding, while here two “gals” were near, one
spinning, the other apparently just from the kitchen; Mrs. Bullock welcomed us
cordially, wanted to know “what I had for the hat” and was much obliged when I
told here it was a present. When we said it was late and we must go back “Why
you ain't going home tonight!! Won't you stay all night with us?” What an idea,
I was almost too much surprised to thank her. As
Our ride was longer than we had expected, and yesterday I found myself perfectly
lame and exhausted, went to Mrs. Dortch's in the evening, felt better; and after
a good
I commenced the “Girondins” the other day, it has for me all the exciting interest of a novel. I could scarcely tear myself away from it yesterday, and am thinking of it all the time, have nothing else particular to do now but read. I long for the time to come when I can commence school again, I am not strong enough yet, and am afraid I shall not be able to commence until Willie and Miss Mary and Eva are gone.
We took our cloth out today, are delighted with the success of our first piece, it looks so even and strong.
We have received news of our daring and successful raid into Memphis, it makes
me quite exultant, is equal to the gallant exploits of the ancient knights. We
hear rumours that Sherman has raised the siege of Atlanta, but
Have been so weak and sick today that I have kept my place on the couch nearly
all the time, reading the “Girondins” in the intervals of my attacks of
weakness. I have a pain in my back nearly all the time, cannot imagine whence it
proceeds. Am tired of lying down and not well enough to read or sew, and fly to
my journal in despair. I have a good deal to write, too, yesterday morning I was
sitting in my large rocking chair, propped back, and listening to Loring read,
when a carriage came up containing—Mrs. Proctor! Miss Lawrence, and Miss
Laura Barnes, the motive of their visit was to get Miss Mary to take part in
some tableaux and plays which the D.D.D's are to give a week from tomorrow, for
the purpose of buying the materials of a flag for the 17th regiment, whose
colours have been destroyed in some of their fights. After some consultation we
decided that it would only be a pleasure for Miss Mary to go, and so we rode
down to Mrs. Dortch's in the afternoon to announce her decision spent the whole
afternoon in discussions of costumes and parts; Miss Mary is to have that of a
housekeeper in a very pretty little play by Miss Edgeworth, whose
good sign. Dr. Furness was over last night, I was
really ill, but not sleepy, and when he came was reclining in a rocking chair in
the parlour listening to Miss Mary's sweet voice. She sang several songs before
she discovered that he was on the piazza; I begin to like him right well, but
have no reason for this change in my opinion, and therefore do not know how long
it may continue.
We have soldiers coming in constantly, there were four here to dinner today, besides, a good many others before and since, poor creatures, we are glad to give them any pleasure in our power, at most, we can do but little for them. I expect the soldiers sewing society will soon be started again, in Monroe, Dr. Furness says the quarter master at Shreveport has plenty of cloth but can get no one to make it up, and many of the soldiers are without clothing. Two came here today to get some washing done, and two shirts made. Mother has taken both to do, is engaged on the shirts this evening. Father is busy this evening, warping another piece of cloth. Willie went to Millhaven this evening, had some personal business and in addition is going to bring back two cows for the hospital, he is much better and will soon leave for his command. Father had commenced a pair of spurs for him.
We had a delightful and needed rain yesterday evening, and there has just been a
little shower, how the leaves sparkle in the light of the declining
so beautiful.
The atmosphere is much cooler, I hope the summer heats are over, it is almost
time. Mrs. Dortch and Mrs. Leighton were here today to bid us goodbye. One of
the hospitals is very near Mrs. Leighton's, and as they come over there
constantly for water and other things, she is afraid of disease, and is going
away this evening. Mrs. Dortch is quite alone, as Miss Laura has gone on a visit
to Miss Lawrence, and she does not like to stay after Mr. Leighton leaves, so
she is going over to her place tomorrow morning. I am very sorry they are gone,
we shall miss them greatly and besides they might have been of assistance about
the soldiers, but they were both so unpleasantly situated they could not stay.
I have been very sick since I wrote last, had a chill last Friday, the first
chill I ever had, and I was so vexed and mortified. I was in bed Saturday,
Sunday and Monday and had a chill each day till the last, I never remember
suffering so much, and my state of mind was very low and painful. I am stronger
now, but my heart is like a deserted house in which the ghosts of the departed
are walking always to and fro. I am so lonesome, Willie has gone, left yesterday
morning, it seems as if with him were gone all the vivacity of the house. Oh my
brother, my brother! I miss him every hour. Father too is absent now, left for
Shreveport Wednesday, he will only be gone a few days but it seems a long time.
We have just heard of the fall of Atlanta, but know no particulars, this is
indeed a great misfortune, and we feel it deeply, Father had expected it but
nevertheless it depressed him
We have a young man staying with us now to recruit his health, Capt. Williams of the engineer corps, he has improved very much since he came last Saturday, I like him very much, is very quiet in his manners and spends most of his time in reading. I feel too weak to take much interest in anything, sit idle a great deal of the time; am taking a preparation of iron, by Dr. Furness' advice, and hope it will improve my health.
There has lately been a sudden change in the weather, yesterday morning on
rising we found it almost cool enough for fires, this morning it is the same;
the golden rod begins to blossom on the hillsides, and a slight autumn tinge
appears an the edges of the limbs; this weather reminds me of that we had on our
trip to Georgia, the crisp, rustling breeze whispers to me of all the pleasant
scenes in my life, it brings to mind all my friends.
I have been taking a walk this morning, exercise is essential to my health, I am
determined to walk every day hereafter; the sky is so deeply blue, the dark
foliage of the pines defines itself so clearly against, all the other trees
glisten in the sunlight and every spear of grass and little flowering sprig is
so full of beauty that a walk is a series of constantly recurring beauties; but
these beauties awaken only memories of other far remembered scenes and people
that have vanished. Can I never free myself from this life in the past, which
from earliest childhood has so clung to me? I do not try as I ought, it is such
a seducing pleasure though I know it is enervating and idle. Father received a letter from Mr.
Father surprised us early Sunday morning, we had not expected him until
tomorrow, were so glad to see him, though he had only been gone three days; I
think his journey did him good, his spirits are much better. He met a gentleman
who left Macon, Georgia, since the evacuation of Atlanta, he said that it was
not considered a very serious loss to us, and that it was there confidently
expected that we should have peace in a few months. I hope it may be so. Every
body that comes from the east side of the river are in fine spirits, they have
not our inaction to depress them. I have improved so much, am well enough to
take a walk every morning, went more than two miles this morning, and don't feel
tired. The weather is still cool and bracing, my spirits mount with my health,
that dreadful and unaccustomed visitant ennui is quite gone. Our guest, Capt.
Williams, improved a great deal, but took a little slip back yesterday. I
continue to like him though he vouchsafes very little conversation to me and
that only when he can't help it. I suppose he feels sick and cross though he
does not show it, I am determined to become acquainted with him, with or against
his will. We have not heard from Willie yet, it is only four days since he left,
but it seems like weeks, I miss him hourly.
This time last year we were on our journey to Georgia, this very
morning a year ago we were in the beautiful, but deadly Lafourche swamp,
and Father was suffering such severe pain as makes us shudder to look upon;
yet I look back upon this time with regret, the accidents and troubles of
our journey are softened by time and distance and the excitation of exercise,
and novelty, and bright hopes stand out in fascinating colours, when I look
back upon the past year so full of uncertainties and trials, of miserable
doubts and impious repinings, I am filled with thoughts so mingled and
various that I that I cannot disentangle them. I am thankful for the restored
health which God has been pleased to vouchsafe me, for the past week my strength
and spirits have been better than I have rejoiced in for months, no terrible
morning weakness, no miserable depression. I have felt the blood flowing bright
and clear in my veins.
Captain Williams left us Wednesday morning for his command, I sent a letter to Willie by him; we missed him very much the day he left, but have gotten accustomed to his absence as easily as we got accustomed to his presence. The day before he left he conversed more with us than ever before, and I found him a most intelligent and interesting companion, he had the sensible quality of not speaking unless he had something to say, and so visible was this peculiarity that I felt no